I woke up around three pm. It wasn't pleasant, I wouldn't eat. I hurt but my sister was hurt more. She never left my side, and I was being selfish. Making her go through all this. It was my fault, I should just eat someone, but I don't what to kill. I don't want to hurt. But even if I don't kill I do hurt. I hurt my brothers and sisters. Mostly Jazzmine though. She cries almost every night. Begs me to eat, but I wont. Thank god it's Christmas break, and thank god her mothers gone. But that still doesn't help the fact im killing her slowly. This went on for four days. I only had three days left to find a mate.

The pain was overwhelming. Constant red hot pain, like knives ripping through my body. When my sister left to get more morphine from her purse downstairs'. There was a knife on the table. It was so easy, just cut my jugular I would die messy, but quietly. I reached for it. Ignoring the pain to the thought of all of it being it over. I got it, letting tears run down my face. Letting my small, malnourished body take in a last breath I put the knives to my own neck. Hay that was a first. I started to cut my pale flesh only to have my hands ripped from my neck and held back.

What are you doing!? She said red as a lobster.

Not answering I turned my head. To ashamed to show my face. She slapped me and let go of my hands. Grabbing the knife she through it directly into the wall.

Brother…. I know it hurts…. But you can not give up like that. No…. YOU WILL NOT GIVE UP LIKE THAT! That's weak, your not weak joker.

She turned to me.

Please…. Just let me put the fangs in.

Sister I've said this before… I couldn't finish, I felt a much greater pain zip through my back. Screaming my sister injected some morphine into me. Triple dose…. I still felt it. It wasn't the same pain. No…. It was electricity.

Sister….. I…. They…. Shocking….. I said thrashing in the bed stuttering each word.

The council. .. Oh my god you only have three days left. That means I only have…. Two… She dropped her bag and stared at me with wide eyes.

Brother! I'm going to put these fangs in you. You are going to listen to me. I'm going to fix all of this. She said very fast

Grabbing her bag, she got some more morphine. Putting in with a total of five heavy doses in me. I couldn't feel anything but the pain in my back. She grabbed four Wight fangs and put them directly into my gums. The artificial fangs drilled all the way into my skull. But I couldn't feel it. I tried to protest, but I only got death stare back from her.

About ten minuets later she sat me up. She looked at me. I knew what she wanted me to do. I couldn't though. I couldn't drain her blood; she's so young and has been through more things then anyone.

No I'm not doing that to you. I said louder then I ment, I coughed up some blood.

Brother, it isn't your choice… Its mine. Now look you're hurting, I won't be hurt for long. I can regenerate faster then you. Please….

I screamed again. Falling back on the bed breathing heavily, I looked at her with teary eyes.

You promise you'll be ok? I said gasping.

I promise on our mother's grave. I'll just be a little weak… Will you let me do this? She said tears rolling down her cheeks.

I'll let you do this… I owe you everything sister, if it wasn't… She cut me off.

Shush….

But what about later? I'm get doing to get hungry again….

Let's not think about then. Right now we need to fix you. So let's just get this over with.

Getting up she came and sat on my lap. Looking at her I put one arm around her stomach. Brushing her hair of her neck I inched to its surface. I felt tears drop onto my arm. Licking at the neck I heard her make a small gasp.

Shhh…. I said with tears in my eyes.

Pressing my fangs gently against her neck, I wrapped my other arm around her and squeezed hard onto her torso. Then like a flash I rammed my two front fangs into her soft neck. She screamed until I pulled them out. Dropping her head, I had to hold her weight with my arms. The crimson liquid ran down her neck. Lapping at it with my toung, she shot up and cursed in her own language softly. I started to suck the blood. Mouthfuls at a time, but I watched myself. I didn't want to kill her. My body slowly began to feel better. My bruises disappeared, my cuts dropped the stitches. My fangs didn't hurt. Putting my hand up to her neck to feel her pulse I realized it was slow. I had enough, I thought to my self. Letting my gripe loosen, she almost fell. Catching her with myself I laid her down and put my hand to her neck to stop the bleeding. Yes thoughs two fang marks were clearly there. I would have to wrap them up.

She was frowning. I put on a cheep smile and went to go get the gauze and bandages. Throwing every thing out of my medicine cabinet, I found what I was looking for. Running back I throw the door open and started to wrap her neck very carefully. She kept crying… I expected that though…. But she started to laugh, manically. She started to have a maniac episode. We try to act like there really isn't anything wrong with us, but…. We do have are off days. And there are things wrong with us. She has mostly tragic episodes. Her nightmares, her episodes, not sleeping. She has a longer list then me.

I laid her down, brushing her hair be hide her ears I shushed her, sang to her, a comforted her. With heavy tears in her eyes she fell asleep in my arms. I curled up next to her, trying to warm her. I realized that in the morning she had to go to a new year's party. As I heard her say while I was supposal sleeping. She was going to Saras, in Illinois. I fell asleep after setting a alarm for 4:00 am. She needed to get ready and go to that house party thing. She has been gone for about a week. That could raise suspension. We'll take the cruzer, I'll watch from the window. Yes… That will work. But until then I needed sleep, but she needed it more. Squeezing and clinging onto her I fell into a deep sleep. Dreaming about nothing…. Absolutely nothing…..