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I hope you like this next chapter!

"Don't look at me like that," Merlin told the horse. "It's our master's fault for drinking too much."

The night at the tavern had been eventful. Merlin had mulled over his feelings as he nursed his ale. The only reason Arthur didn't call him out on being pathetic was because the prince had been too busy complaining. The king had ordered him to increase the guard, but Arthur refused to tax the people further and they were at loggerheads over where the coin was going to come from.

Merlin was only half-listening. He felt pathetic without Arthur telling him so. He had always known how he was feeling, so why was this different?

His brooding meant Arthur drunk far more than he did and when he had arrived at the prince's chambers that morning, it was for Arthur to order him to muck out the stables as punishment for being cheerful. Merlin had just rolled his eyes and left - after ensuring there was sufficient food and drink to stop the prince feeling so rough by the time he attended training. While Merlin thought Arthur deserved it, he also knew full well who would end up looking after him afterwards and wanted to make his life a little easier.

"Hello, Merlin."

Merlin jumped, staring at the horse in bewilderment before realising the voice came from behind him. He turned and smiled at seeing Clarissa in the doorway. There was a basket over one arm and she smiled at him, partly in greeting, partly in apology for making him start.

"Hi," Merlin said. The horse snorted in his ear and nudged him on the arm. Merlin turned and glared at the creature, wishing it wouldn't try to interfere.

"Are you busy?"

"Nope," Merlin said. Clarissa looked around the stables and Merlin followed her gaze before shrugging. "Nothing important that can't wait. He won't even notice. Do you need help with something?"

"Not exactly." Clarissa shifted the basket's weight, looking at the floor before back up at him. "I wondered if you would like to join me for lunch?"

"A picnic?" Merlin's eyebrows raised in surprise even as he grinned. From the disastrous attempts at love and courting he had witnessed in Camelot, especially lately with charms flying back and forth amongst the royals, a picnic meant more than just friendship.

"Only if you want to."

"Definitely," Merlin said. He threw down his fork and secured the stable door behind him. "Give me a few minutes to get changed."

Clarissa agreed to meet him in the courtyard and Merlin sped back to Gaius'. He hadn't confirmed how he was feeling the night before and he wondered if this would clarify things for him. He certainly enjoyed spending time with her and it would be nice to get away from the castle.

He splashed his face, ran his fingers through his hair and pulled on a clean shirt before hurrying back outside. He didn't want to leave her waiting, but also didn't want Arthur to see him and prevent him from leaving. Luck was on his side, for once, and Merlin breathlessly arrived in the courtyard. Clarissa rose from where she had been sitting on the steps and Merlin gallantly offered her his arm.

They couldn't go far – Merlin knew he would never get away with "borrowing" a couple of horses from the stable for the entire afternoon without Arthur finding out. But it wasn't far to a small clearing that was out of sight of the castle. The grass was lush and green and a small stream trickled through it. Merlin had found it by accident in his first few months in Camelot and hadn't had the chance to spend time here properly.

The delighted smile on Clarissa's face made it worth it. She had thought of everything and Merlin took the blanket from her to spread it out on the grass. There wasn't much food but he hadn't expected more. She could afford it even less than he could, despite Gaius paying her what he could for her assistance.

"This looks great," Merlin said sincerely. He helped her sit down and wondered if he should have been the one to come up with the idea. He didn't understand the intricacies of getting to know someone, despite Gwen's suggestions.

"It's not much," Clarissa said, blushing.

"It's perfect."

The afternoon passed quickly. They ate in silence, neither of them knowing what to say. But then they relaxed in each other's presence and shared stories and quips from their past. Merlin made her laugh more than once with some of the adventures he had experienced since arriving in Camelot. He made them sound bold and daring rather than terrifying and dangerous, but if Clarissa noticed, she didn't let on.

"Tell me about your magic."

Merlin was lying on his back, soaking in the sun. His head lifted at her question and he slowly sat up, propping himself up on his elbow.

"Why?" He had never openly spoken about his magic before. The only time he discussed it with Gaius was when an emergency demanded it. There was no one else to talk to.

"I understand so little and yet you saved my life with it. I'm curious."

Merlin couldn't resist that and he opened his mouth. No words escaped him though. He didn't know what to say. He couldn't explain his magic because it was just part of him. He had never been without it and didn't know what aspects of himself was linked to his magic and what other people felt. He shrugged.

"There's not much to tell," he said. He carefully looked around, remembering all too well the consequences the last time he had used magic in the open. Once he was sure no one was about other than Clarissa, he smiled.

"But I can show you."

He had never showed off with magic the way he did that afternoon, but her smile made it worth it. As the sun started to dip behind the horizon, Merlin sighed.

"We should be getting back." He knew Arthur would kill him if he didn't show up. He made to stand but Clarissa put her hand on his chest, pushing him back to the ground.

Before Merlin knew what was happening, she had lent in and kissed him deeply. He had never been kissed like that and was more than happy to return it. But as Clarissa moved closer, Merlin knew the answer to his dilemma.

He didn't love her.

He liked her, a lot. But her kiss didn't make him feel alive the way Freya's had done. There was no spark, no real desire. He enjoyed her company and having fun, but not this. He slowly pulled back.

"I think I love you," Clarissa whispered. Merlin awkwardly stood up.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, having no idea what to say. "We really should get going, Arthur will be looking for me."

It happened so fast that he convinced himself he imagined it. But a flash of pure fury shot over Clarissa's face, twisting her features into something ugly. When he blinked, she looked saddened but like her normal self.

"I understand," she said, also standing up. "You have others who come first."

Merlin didn't know what to make of that, so for the first time in his life, he did the sensible thing and remained quiet. Clarissa touched his arm.

"Don't let this spoil our friendship," she said with a smile. It didn't reach her eyes the way it had done previously. She reached up and unclasped a chain from her neck. Merlin hadn't noticed it before. A small pendant hung on the end, a pale red teardrop no bigger than the pad of his thumb.

"I want you to have this," she said. Merlin shook his head.

"I can't. It's all you have."

"And I owe you my life," Clarissa said. She took his hand and pressed the chain into it. "I want to thank you, Merlin. I understand if you don't return my feelings, but as a friend, I want you to have it."

"Thank you," Merlin said. Not knowing what else to do, he clasped it around his own neck. This time, Clarissa's smile appeared real and Merlin knew he had done the right thing to keep her friendship. He touched her shoulder gently.

"I do care for you," he began. Clarissa put a finger against his lips.

"Maybe in time," she said. "But let's not ruin our day."

Merlin agreed whole-heartedly with that and the conversation felt like nothing more than a dream when they arrived back in Camelot, breathless with laughter from where they had rushed. Merlin escorted her back to her rooms, claiming he was being gallant, but they both knew it was because he needed to get to Arthur.

Once her door had shut, Merlin tucked the pendant down his shirt and opened the door to his master's room.

"So, Merlin," Arthur drawled and Merlin groaned. His absence had been noted and the prince was less than happy. It was going to be a long evening.

But he didn't regret the afternoon.

MMM

When Arthur awoke, he couldn't initially work out what had disturbed his rest. His room was in darkness and the fire had died down, meaning it had to be the middle of the night at least. Merlin had left hours ago and Arthur knew his servant would be asleep; it wasn't Merlin disturbing him for once.

All seemed quiet and Arthur lay back down. But just as sleep tried to claim him, he heard it again. The faint sound of something breaking. Instantly alert for an intruder, he slipped from the bed and drew his sword. On a whim, he checked beneath the bed, but neither Merlin nor anyone else was hiding there this time. He stood in the middle of his room, on edge and waiting for the next crash.

He didn't have to wait long and he realised the noise wasn't coming from his chambers at all. It seemed to be coming from the ones next door, the thick stone walls muffling the noise. Arthur pulled on his boots and strode for the door. Merlin may have saved the girl in the forest (Arthur knew it even if he refused to say it out loud when Merlin was in earshot), but Arthur knew his servant wouldn't forgive him if something happened to her when she was just next door.

He stole down the corridor and paused outside the door. He heard a snarl of frustration and another crash and Arthur pushed against the wood. It wasn't locked and the door opened a fraction on well-oiled hinges.

The prince froze. From his limited vision, he could see that Clarissa was alone. Arthur thought he should check she was alright, but even as the thought entered his mind, she picked up a pot and flung it at the wall with a cry of rage. Arthur backed away, shutting the door silently and slipping back to his own chambers. He turned the key in the lock this time before toeing off his shoes, putting his sword away and climbing back into bed.

Sleep was a long time coming though. What was she so angry about? She may have lost her belongings in the forest but she had escaped with her life and Arthur knew that Gwen had fashioned her a new dress. He would know Guinevere's work anywhere and he wondered if he was as bad as Merlin's teasing implied. Now, however, he forced his thoughts away from her. Camelot had been Clarissa's intended destination and she had found work and lodgings far grander than anything she could imagine.

So what had her lashing out in the middle of the night like a woman possessed? Arthur's last thought was he would have to ask Merlin. If anyone knew, it was his servant. He had spent the afternoon shirking his duties to be with her, after all. Arthur snorted, pushed his pillows into a more comfortable position and tried to put the matter out of his mind so he could sleep.

When he next awoke, it was to the sound of someone pounding angrily on the door and sunlight streaming through. Arthur rolled out of bed and unlocked the door, revealing an irate Merlin standing the other side.

"You want me to be on time and then lock me out!"

"You know you could have entered through the servant's quarters?" Arthur hadn't even considered locking that door. Clarissa might have been angry, but Arthur doubted she would slip through the servant's door if she wanted to gain access to the prince. It was too well concealed – that was the whole point of it, after all.

Merlin looked at him like he was mad and elbowed his way into the room. As he brushed past Arthur, the prince caught sight of something around his servant's neck. He hid a smirk, knowing it must be a trinket from Clarissa as he certainly hadn't seen it before and not a lot got past Arthur.

"If your breakfast is cold, you're not blaming me," Merlin huffed as he put a tray on the table and began making the bed. He tripped over Arthur's boots and stared at his master.

"I put them away last night."

"I got them out again."

"Why?"

"I heard something."

Merlin looked alarmed and Arthur barely concealed his amusement. He was the first Knight of Camelot and Merlin could barely remain upright. Merlin wouldn't have been able to assist him even if there had been something dangerous occurring.

"And?"

Arthur was halfway through a mouthful of food and stared at Merlin, the conversation already having fled his mind.

"What?"

"Was anything wrong or was your hearing playing tricks on you? Wouldn't be the first time, would it?"

Arthur flicked a grape at his servant. "It was something, actually," he said slowly, cautiously. For all of his teasing, he knew Clarissa meant something to Merlin and his own recent discovery of love meant he knew how painful it could be if not handled correctly. Merlin was an idiot, but Arthur wouldn't wish that on anyone.

"It was Clarissa."

"What about her?" If Arthur wasn't mistaken, Merlin's tone was guarded and he looked wary as he stared at Arthur.

"She…" Arthur had no idea how to say what had occurred. "Did something happen yesterday between the two of you?"

"Why would you care?"

Arthur ignored the bite to Merlin's comment. "Because something made her lash out and destroy half her room in the middle of the night."

"That's nonsense."

"Are you calling me a liar?"

"Maybe you were still asleep? Maybe you dreamt it?"

Arthur sighed at Merlin's challenge. He could understand why the man would defend her – no one wanted to admit the person they cared about had a temper, especially as one as destructive as Arthur had witnessed. He also realised that Merlin hadn't answered the question.

"So something did happen between the two of you?"

"It's none of your business. Besides, you're wrong about her."

"I know what I saw, Merlin."

"Show me."

"Excuse me?"

"Show me," Merlin repeated. He moved across the room to stand opposite Arthur. "She's out for Gaius at the moment, so show me the destruction."

Arthur knew it was a bad idea and an invasion of privacy. But he was not going to stand for Merlin calling him a liar or acting as if Arthur was the one who had done something wrong.

"Fine." Arthur stood up and strode out of the room. Merlin had to run to catch up. Despite his servant saying that she wasn't there, he still knocked on the door. There was no answer and Arthur pushed it open.

The room was spotless.

"I know what I saw," he repeated. He knew it hadn't been a dream; the fact his boots were in the wrong place was testimony of that.

"It was late and you were tired." Merlin's voice was softer now and he reached out, pulling the door shut. "Nothing happened here."

"I know it," Arthur muttered. "She looked feral, she was furious. She looked…dangerous."

"Stop it." Merlin turned and marched back into the prince's chambers and Arthur followed suit, wondering what was going on with Merlin.

"You should be careful around her," he warned. Merlin turned, anger on his own face.

"I can look after myself, Sire. She's just a girl who has been through a lot and I'm trying to help her. Maybe you should give it a go, someday. Helping someone out of the goodness of your heart rather than for the glory."

"You're going too far, Merlin."

"Someone has to say it."

"Merlin!"

"Not everything is about you, Arthur!"

"Get out." Arthur pointed at the door, anger coursing through him. He had always respected that Merlin said what he thought rather than bowed and scrapped like the normal servants. But he was the Prince of Camelot and Merlin was just his servant. There was a line and Merlin had just crossed it. Judging by the look on his servant's face, he had no intention of backing down either. Arthur wanted Merlin to leave before either of them said something they couldn't take back.

Merlin threw down his cleaning cloth with a huff and stormed from the room, slamming the door shut behind him. Arthur didn't move until he was certain his servant had left.

With the pendant hidden inside Merlin's shirt, neither of them saw it pulse.

Arthur sank into his chair and ran his fingers through his hair. He had never heard Merlin sound so bitter before and if he was honest, Arthur was concerned that maybe he was the one who had gone too far. But he was damned if he was going to chase after his servant and apologise.

He finished his breakfast in a mood, then dressed and sheathed his sword. There was only one person who could help him with this. Despite knowing Morgana would never let him live it down, Arthur didn't know who else he had to turn too.