Mira: Here we are! Back fo—

Envy: Shh!

Lane: Anyway…Here's the next ch—

Envy: Shhhhhh!

Mira&Lane: … *stare*

Ed: Mira and Lane don't ow—

Envy: Shut it!

Ed: …

Al: Theydon'townfullmetalalchemist!

Envy: CAN WE JUST GET TO THE CHAPTER? I want to play strip poker…

MAD Academy

A Collaborative Project by:

Mira Hinder and Lane Render

A Fullmetal Alchemist

Crack / Alternate Universe Fanime

Mira's POV

Morning Homeroom; Mrs. Riley's Homeroom

Lane was bouncing up and down on her seat, hands in her lap, watching the clock. Yeah, I know that probably doesn't strike you as weird, but Wrath and I were doing it as well. In complete unison.

Why are we acting like total freaks (more than normal at least)? Because, my friends slash enemies. It was Friday.

Let me explain something. Fridays at this academy were random fun days. Like karaoke day, or paint-splatter-the-halls day, or (and this has happened) let's-all-pack-up-and-go-to-the-water-park day.

Well, today was club day. And take a wild guess which club Wrath, Lane, and I all decided to hang out in?

"Alright, you can pass," Mrs. Riley opened the door.

The three of us jumped over our desks and sped out of the classroom.

Lane's POV

Mustang's Science Room

Ed and Al were just walking down the hallway with their messenger bag. "GUUUYS!" Mira and I called, running up to them, Mira grabbing one of Ed's arms and me grabbing one of Al's, dragging them along with us. "Let's go!" We ran into Mustang's homeroom.

"What the hell, crazies!" Ed shouted as Mira shoved him into a seat next to Envy at one of the lab tables.

"L-lane! What are you guys doing!" Al stared at me with a 'what the hell insane girl I don't even know' look.

"YOU GUYS!" Wrath pouted at us, running in behind us. "You ran away!"

"Sorry!" I patted his head and turned to the Elrics. "Club day. We have no classes. We get to chill in here!"

"No one explained that to you guys?" Envy questioned.

The Elrics chorused, "Nope."

I was just observing the fact that we were the only ones in Mr. Mustang's room. Well, to be honest, I should have figured that there wouldn't have been any of the science nerds. They knew that we were crazy and only here to goof off, and they were probably anticipating something they wouldn't want to be involved in, which was what Envy was just suggesting, "So we should definitely play strip poker."

"Yes!" Mira and I agreed immediately, before looking at each other and saying simultaneously, "waaaait…."

"What?" Envy asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Can't play poker," we chorused.

"Oh that's fine, I know how to modify BS for it."

"Awesome!" I cheered as Mira fist pumped.

"Now Lane, Mira, mostly Lane, go be cute and convince Mustang to let us do it," Envy directed. Ed and Al both had looks of concern, but we were all ignoring them for the moment being.

Mira and I consented and skipped over to 's desk.

"Rooooy!" I sang, lightly pushing the newspaper out of his face.

He sighed, looking up at us. "Yes?"

"Well, we wanted to know if we could-" Mira started before cut her off.

"Does it involve anything too risqué?"

We looked at each other then back at him and smiled innocently.

He sighed."You know what, I don't want to know about it. Go in the science closet. Lock the door. Don't touch anything. I will not bail you out if you get caught. I will pretend that you snuck in there on your own. Understood?"

"Thank you!" we cheered before skipping back to the boys. "Mission accomplished!"

Al's POV

Science Closet

Mira and Lane made sure that both doors were locked while Wrath buzzed around the room looking in cabinets at chemistry supplies. I wasn't sure what "BS" was, but I was pretty sure I knew what "strip" entailed. And that made me kinda nervous.

"So I assume we all know how to play BS?" Envy was shuffling cards very skillfully. Brother and I shook our heads, "Okay. Then I guess I get to explain it to you noobs."

I questioned what a "nub" was. I peeked a look at Ed and he gave me this look like his overly-confident self. It was a little reassuring.

"So the object of BS is to get rid of all your hand of cards. Sound simple enough?" he said tauntingly at Ed, who glowered back at him, "However, we go in a circle putting down cards facedown in order from Ace to King. Whoever has Ace of Spades goes first."

"Well we're obviously going to have to lie," Ed said, "BS. Bullshit. I get it."

"Thanks Captain Obvious. I was about to say that," Envy glared at him. Ed glared back, "And yes. You have to lie. If you think someone's lying. Say "bullshit" or "bs" whichever floats your boat. If you're right, they have to pick up all the cards lying down and take off one item of clothing," he wiggled his eyebrows in Mira's direction and she stuck her tongue out at him, "And if you're lacking clothing, you may put one item back on. If you're wrong, you have to take the pile and take off an item of clothing. And if you lie, after the person next to you puts down a card and calls it, you have to say peanut butter. Any questions?"

Silence. I put on my best poker face.

This had been an awful, terrible, just plain bad idea. Mostly I thought so because I was extremely uncomfortable. We seemed to have gotten stuck in an endless loop and Envy didn't let us put clothes back on when a new game started. Mira was down to just her bra and underwear and Lane, who was sitting next to me, was down to her skirt and her bra. And when I say skirt and bra I mean it, her panties were sitting in the growing pile of clothes. It had been so hard to avert my eyes when she took them off. I didn't want to look (or at least I convinced myself of that) but I couldn't not look. Like a car crash. But more attractive.

My shirt was gone but my bottoms were still intact. Envy was only missing his shoes. Wrath and Ed had managed not to lose anything the entire time.

It was Lane's turn. She was cursing at herself under her breath, "Goddammit I'm usually beast at this game." She placed a card on the pile, calling out, "One seven."

Envy examined her face before saying, "BS."

"NO! Take it off!" She yelled and she grabbed her underwear from the pile and stood to pull them on. "Oh that feels nice, I lost these last game."

Envy sighed, taking off his socks. "Whatever, babe." He shrugged.

I stared at my hand muttering, "Two eights." No one questioned it.

The turn then passed to brother. "One nine," he spoke confidently.

"Peanut butter," I offered up, and Mira and Lane both swore. I suppose they really wanted their clothes back.

Envy moved to put down his cards but Mira yelled out, "Wait!" while staring at Ed's face. They had a short staring contest that ended in Mira yelling out, "BS!" and pointed dramatically at Brother.

"Goddammit," he swore.

And that was the end of his winning streak.

Another couple games and I was wearing my shirt again. Lane had only managed to loose and gain back her underwear many times over. Envy was topless at the moment. Mira was still down to her bra and underwear. Wrath had still somehow managed not to lose anything, and Ed was only in his boxers.

Cursing to himself, he jumped the moment Mira said, "One five," shouting out a triumphant "BS!"

Mira blushed, cursing. As Ed put his pants back on he seemed to make the realization the Mira was already down to just her underwear. As Envy cheered, "Take it off, Mira babe!" Ed and I exchanged looks of discomfort.

Ed's POV

Well obviously I had wanted to just get my clothes back on, but I hadn't looked at who I was catching to do it. And when I realized what she was down to, I became extremely uncomfortable. She was going to end up taking off her bra.

As Mira blushed red she surprised me by putting her legs in front of her, clamping her thighs tightly together, and instead taking off her underwear. Al gave me an absolutely terrified look, but I just shrugged helplessly and stared up at the ceiling as Mira placed her cards in her lap.

She was only like that for a few moments before the bell rang. I heard the sound of metal on the door and a lock clicking before Mustang stuck his head in and started, "Time to le-" before catching a look at everyone, frowning, and turning tail, closing the door behind him.

Mira's POV

Mr. Mustang closed the door and I was the first who jumped at the pile to grab my clothes, "Alright. Wrath wins. Now gimme my goddamn underwear!" I pulled them on and shot a quick look at each of the guys. Wrath, Ed, and Al were all respectfully looking in another direction. Envy on the other hand was staring at my face with unwavering eyes.

"Don't worry your pretty little head," he smirked as I picked my clothes out of the pile, "I'm not looking."

My face was probably as red as the stupid fire extinguisher hanging off the wall, but I paid no mind and dressed myself. The reason I didn't say much is that I'd let myself take a couple of looks at the guys. Save Wrath. That little card shark was able to keep all his clothing on. At any rate, I noticed that all three of the guys were…let's say "well shaped." I know Envy did his fair share of working out, and I'd been swimming with him before.

The Elrics on the other hand I've only known for a few days, so I wasn't sure what to expect. Al was around the same look as Envy; as in he was well defined and mostly smooth skinned. Ed though, had a strange amount of scars along his body. I zipped the side of my skirt up while watching him out of the corner of my eyes. His arms stretched as he pulled them through his shirt, "Oh my god…" I said softly, just as Envy started loudly teasing Al for "gawking" at Lane. A slightly good-natured argument started among them all.

He was close enough to me to be the only one that heard me; "Hm?" he met my eyes.

I blushed at being caught looking, "Where'd you get that?" I pointed at the spot where his right shoulder met his arm. A bumpy and painful-looking scar wound all the way around his arm. I followed the line down to his chest where there were similarly textured scars in the shape of circles embedded into his flesh.

His eyes followed my gaze to his shoulder and he gasped, pulling his shirt forward and started to button it up, "I—um…it's…" the expression on his face was almost comical. He looked up at me, his face a deep red color, "It's an accident."

"You mean it's from an accident?" I wondered aloud.

"…Yeah," he looked away and I pulled on my button-down white shirt.

Ed's POV

It would have been stupid to expect none of them to notice, but my stomach still dropped down past my feet when Mira mentioned it. She seemed to notice it made me uncomfortable so she focused on pulling on her knee high socks, though I noticed her keep glancing at me. I self consciously pulled my school uniform blazer tighter, looking away from her and focusing on Al's blushing face as he stammered something out at Envy, who was still standing around topless, fighting Lane and stopping her from pulling her sweater vest over her head. She ended up toppling backwards onto Envy and I could tell from one look at Al's face that he had gotten a glimpse up her skirt as she fell. If she wearing her tights, I'm sure Al would have passed out from the embarrassment.

We all got our clothes back on and left the room, Al, Envy, and Lane walking along and laughing, Lane and Envy tag teaming making Al uncomfortable as Wrath skipped along beside them. I waited behind for Mira who was having trouble with her boots. Standing there in the doorway my brain started working to come up with some lie I could tell her to explain away the scars. How do you explain automail scars to someone in this world? How could I possibly explain those away?

We shuffled along behind the four of our friends. I shoved my hands in my pockets, staring straight ahead.

"Ed?"

I jumped a little at the sound of her voice, but didn't look at her when I asked, "Yeah?"

"I don't mean to pry, but…what happened?"

I was about to stammer out some half-assed answer but instead I told her some amount of truth, "I don't really like talking about it. Shouldn't have even played that game in the first place none of you want to see that," I grumbled the last part out.

I side-glanced at her, and saw her giving me a look of disbelief. "Seriously, Ed? Ok I totally get it, you don't have to talk about it, I'm sure whatever it's from isn't pleasant. But Ed, it's doesn't change the fact that your kinda hot." She seemed to realize what she said and her cheeks turned pink.

I felt my cheeks heat up a little too. "Yeah, right. Your lying."

"Your overly self conscious Ed. Trust me, I know, Lane is the frigging queen of it, though she brushes it off by being obnoxiously open about her body. And I mean…I'm a teenage girl I know body image issues. I have a ton, and I'm not pretty enough to shrug them off."

"Are you kidding me, Mira?" I almost laughed. "You seriously shouldn't have any image problem."

She blushed. "Well I guess we all have some issues with that."

I considered it for a moment. I then considered that maybe I wasn't terribly disgusting. Maybe my scars weren't all that bad. I considered it, but still didn't completely believe it.

Mira broke my thoughts. "Hey Ed, wanna come over today?"

"Huh? Why's that?"

"I wanna brush your hair."

I stared at her blankly.

She blushed, but insisted, "C'mon, it's seriously nice."

I laughed. "Well thanks. Sure, I'll come over.

Mira's House; After School

Mira's brother made me seriously uncomfortable. I sat, legs dangling off Mira's bed (I'm not short, her beds just high up!) with Mira cross-legged behind me, working a brush through my hair. It would be a very soothing feeling if it weren't for the fact that the doorway opened to show Mira's brother Jacob leaning against the opposite wall, staring into the bedroom, right to the bed, straight at my face. He had a bowl off popcorn in his lap and he kept popping some in his mouth and crunching.

"What's his problem?" I muttered.

"Oh he's just-" Mira started, but Jacob cut her off.

"You look like a punk!" Jacob called in, popping a piece of popcorn in his mouth.

"I look like a punk?"

"You don't," she assured me.

"He does," Jacob called.

"He'll get used to you," Mira told me muttering, "eventually…" to herself.

Well that was reassuring.

Mira's POV

"He's just being a dip…" I tried to explain, "He doesn't like ANY guy." looking scar wound all the way around his arm. I followed the line down to his chest where there were similarly textured scars in the shape of circles embedded into

"Yeah I can tell…" he grumbled, "Can I piss him off?" He turned up to look at me, his eyes almost pleading me.

"That depends how you plan to do that," I mumbled.

"I can tell you don't mean it," he sighed, "I won't mess with him…"

"What are you two muttering about in there?"

Mira and I both jumped.

Mira: Shortest chapter yet. Haha.

Lane: Yup. I miss the longness.

Ed: …

Al: …

Envy: R&R please! :D