"Welcome back to another episode of Hope's Peak Variety Show. I'm your host, Monokuma."
"And I'm-"
"Today we picked a small handful of students to participate in a group date. What's so special about this one? We have several despair inducing activities and pranks in store for these lucky participants. Let's get right in and introduce everyone."
Kyoko Kirigiri
Ibuki Mioda
Celestia Ludenberg
Hifumi Yamada
Peko Pekoyama
Akane Owari
Nekomaru Nidai
Fuyuhiko Kuzuryu
Kiyotaka Ishimaru
Sakura Ogami
"So how many of you have been on a group date before?"
No hands were raised.
"How many of you have been on a date?"
Peko was about to raise her hand but Fuyuhiko stopped her. No hands were raised again.
"How many of you are all single losers?"
No hands were raised.
"At least show some excitement!" Monokuma shouted, realising why nobody was raising their hands.
"Do any of you now where we are?"
"Nezumi Theme Park." Kyoko answered.
"Correct! First, we will split you all into groups of two-"
"Wouldn't the term pairs, be much easier Monokuma." Celeste challenged Monokuma, making him scream in anger.
"You will get into pairs, and explore the park together. The pairs will be determined through a luck draw. Later, we will all meet up for dinner, and then you can confess your feelings to your love."
"W-what?" Ishimaru began sweating.
"You heard me! But first, let's get your opinions on who you would prefer to be with today…"
Celeste: How very bold of Monokuma to ask me who I would want based on first impressions. Out of everyone, nobody interests me. I do have my eye on Hifumi, but only to use him for my personal benefits. His royal milk has improved since we first got to this academy.
Hifumi: I have no interests for any of the girls here. 2D is the only way for me.
Kyoko: I will be frank. I am not interested in any of the people present.
Peko: *Blushing* I-I cannot just...perhaps the young master…
Fuyuhiko: Why the hell do I have to answer this? There's no way I'm gonna say who I'm interested in...I mean, I don't like anyone in general!
Sakura: I harbour no feelings for anyone here. I do not usually tell anyone this but my heart remains faithful to my first love.
Ibuki: Aww...Ibuki was hoping Hajime could make it. Even Ryota works. But if Ibuki must choose, she chooses the ogre!
Akane: Coach Nekomaru of course! Who else?
Nekomaru: Bwahaha! I have to say, Akane is the closest to what I'm looking for. Lately, I've been giving 'it' to her.
Taka: I cannot allow this group date to happen! Public display of affection is not welcome in a school environment. This variety show has become a bad influence on my fellow schoolmates. Action must be taken before-
"Boy, they have no lives." Monokuma muttered to himself as he monitored the ten students with a surveillance camera system that he installed. "This is the behind the scenes of the group date, and we will cause much despair on these students. Joining me today for some pranks is…"
"Hey everyone. It's your fashionista Junko Enoshima. But feel free to call me one of the despair sisters. I'm with my sis Mukuro, here to deliver despair! So who is with who Monokuma?"
"These people!"
Ibuki with Peko
Hifumi with Kyoko
Celeste with Fuyuhiko
Nekomaru with Sakura
Akane with Kiyotaka
"Interesting pairings...let's ruin their dates!"
"Up top!" Monokuma and Junko gave each other a high five.
"Let's examine the first group…"
From the camera, you could see that Ibuki was dragging Peko around the theme park, stopping for cotton candy, rides, puking out cotton candy, and games. All expenses paid for by the government!
Pretend I never said that last bit.
"Peko-chan! Let's climb the castle!" Ibuki began climbing the castle which alerted the security guard stationed nearby.
"Excuse me miss, you're not allowed to climb the castle."
"But it's fun! Right Peko-chan?"
The guard turned to Peko. "Please tell her to-"
"Could you repeat that?" Peko asked, her red eyes staring directly to the guard's soul.
"Nothing miss. Have a good day!" And with that, he ran off.
Monokuma: Bwahaha! That look of despair on the guard's face. I'm surprised they hired someone with the lack of a backbone!
Junko: I'm bored. Nothing we do can bring those two to despair even if we tried.
Monokuma: You're just being lazy!
Hifumi was running around the park chortling while wearing many of the mascot clothing from the gift shops. Kyoko followed close behind staying on her phone. There really was no chemistry.
Monokuma: This is lame. Let's activate the water fountain near Kyoko, shall we?
Instantly, the water fountain near Kyoko exploded and began to rain on the detective. Kyoko was slightly taken back but remained her stoic expression. She wiped her hair and walked away with a slightly pissed look.
Junko: What the f*ck? She had like, no reaction!
Mukuro: I'm here for you Junko...
"Be a dear a get me a royal milk tea. You can also get yourself something." Celeste handed Fuyuhiko a single thousand yen bill.
"Why the hell should I do that?"
"Because you are the male in the relationship. And I do believe a gentleman must care to his ladies' needs."
"Go to hell. I'm not doing your bidding just because Monokuma put us here in this stupid date."
"Hmph. Fine, I shall go get it myself." With that, Celeste walked off to buy her royal milk tea.
Monokuma: Attitude~
Junko: You should see her when she's mad. It is hilarious!
Junko: Sis, Nekomaru and Sakura are boring!
Monokuma: There's nothing worth inflicting despair upon!
Nekomaru and Sakura were walking side by side talking about many sports programs, but there were no opportunities to inflict despair.
"Hey there, hall monitor." Akane grabbed Taka with her two arms and was trying to press his face in her boobs.
"Akane, I must plead for you to stop. During a date, we must remain a thirty centimetre distance. But in your case it must be doubled!"
Monokuma: Junko, you thinking what I'm thinking?
Junko: Mhm. Someone push Taka!
Standing near the duo, Mukuro was wearing a beige trenchcoat, sunglasses, and a white mask to protect her identity. Without either Akane or Taka noticing, she pushed Taka into Akane's boobs. Taka screamed while Akane complained about him tickling her.
Junko: Monokuma~ Can we skip to the dinner rotation already?
Monokuma: Sure! I got bored already. Geez...this is worse than the perso-
Usami: Don't say it!
Monokuma: Worse than the persona four group date.
Usami: He said it…
"This dinner date will be a rotation." Monokuma explained. "You will have a small dinner date with one person for five minutes, then we rotate to the next person. This will go on til' everyone has been with everyone rotating once. Group date dinner rotation, begin!"
These are the people rotating:
Kyoko
Celeste
Peko
Ibuki
Akane
Our first pair is Kyoko and Fuyuhiko, followed with Celeste and Sakura, Peko and Taka, Ibuki with Nekomaru, and Akane with Hifumi.
"Tell me about yourself Fuyuhiko." Kyoko was cutting her steak and putting a small dab of butter, while Fuyuhiko ate hamburger steak.
"What? You gonna report my crimes to the police?" Fuyuhiko smirked.
"No. Monokuma said we have to ask at least one question or else he's gonna fire the cream cannon on us. I assume you don't want that to happen." Kyoko pointed to Monokuma who held the cream cannon with a devilish grin.
"Tch. The usual yakuza stuff. Illegal imports, territory disputes, blackmail. What about you?"
"I'm a private investigator. I do my own work and report things to the police. Now that we've asked our question, let's go back to eating." Kyoko went back to eating her steak, as did Fuyuhiko.
"Celeste, may I ask why you went to today's recording? You seemed like you disinterested like a few of our classmates."
"It is simply so I can appeal to all the viewers. I did a little spying myself, and it turns out the public will vote for their favorite student. Although there's no prize besides a trophy, winning would allow me to spread my name further in the underground system. But don't take my word for it. I may be wrong. May I ask why you came?"
"I see. To answer that, Hina was originally meant to come but she caught a cold."
"So you're her substitute. You two must be very good friends."
Celeste and Sakura resumed with their meals, a salad and eclairs, and a protein shake and a royal milk tea respectively.
"Peko." Taka attempted to talk with Peko, but received a glare from both Fuyuhiko and her. "Um, how is your dinner?"
Junko: Man, Taka sure is a loser, huh.
"I cannot complain." Peko stated, and went back to eating her meal and drinking her coconut milk.
Mukuro: I'm surprised Peko didn't cut him down. Also surprised Fuyuhiko didn't shoot Taka on the spot.
"Ibuki is curious! How does Nekomaru make such huge muscles?"
"Bwahahaha! Hard work and determination. Everyday, you must run one hundred laps around the school for a healthy life!"
"So if Ibuki runs one hundred laps around this restaurant, Ibuki can get huge muscles?!"
Junko: Why do I have a bad feeling about this…
"Ibuki shall do it! One hundred laps it is!" Ibuki jumped from her chair and began to run around the restaurant, bumping into every waiter trying to serve other customers.
Junko: We should rotate before Ibuki tears down the restaurant, shouldn't we.
Monokuma: Mhm.
"Ibuki, please come back and eat your food." Taka pleaded with the running girl.
"No way! I can feel the burning of my legs! I can feel it!"
"Ibuki you will come back or I will give you detention!"
"Worth it!"
From Fuyuhiko's table, Celeste let out a sigh.
"How immature of her. If she keeps this up who know what will happen to her."
"Shut the hell up you bitch. I don't wanna talk with you."
Celeste's eye twitched slightly before she went back to her poker face.
Junko: This should be interesting. Mukuro, pour something on her.
Mukuro: As you wish Junko.
While Celeste was enjoying her royal milk tea, Mukuro in her disguise from before accidentaly spilled water on her gothic dress.
"Very sorry ma'am." Mukuro said and ran back to Junko, Monokuma, and Usami whose mouth was taped shut. Fuyuhiko began laughing at her suffering and Celeste snapped.
"That's it! I've had it with this stupid show! I don't care about the general rankings on the most popular student anymore! In fact, let me say everything wrong with this show! For starters, were being hosted by two furries! A young adult wearing bear ears and a young lady wearing bunny ears! Disgusting!"
From the side, Ibuki collapsed on the floor.
"Ibuki's legs feel funny…"
We are currently experiencing technical difficulties. We apologise for the inconvenience.
"And we're back. We've have to skip to the confessions part because we had to send Ibuki to the hospital. Mikan is on her way there unfortunately so Ibuki will live. Everyone, are you all nervous?"
Nobody raised their hands as per usual. Peko was about to but Fuyuhiko glared at her to put it down.
"Grr...who wants to go first?"
Surprisingly, Celeste's hand shot up first.
"Go ahead Celeste."
Celeste stormed up to Hifumi and started screaming at him. "Listen hear you big tub of lard! I want to go back to my dorm, so accept my confession!"
"O-of course Miss Ludenberg."
Celeste grabbed Hifumi's arm and they made their way back to the campus.
"Wow." Usami said.
"Coach Nekomaru! Let's go get dessert after this." Akane smiled at him, earning one back.
"Sure!" He extended his arm which Akane grasped. Together they walked off to a local ice cream shop.
"Boring~" Junko yawned and rested her head on Mukuro's shoulder.
"Y-young master." Peko stuttered. She was blushing like mad and so was Fuyuhiko.
"S-shut up Peko." He tried to say, but only resulted in whispers.
"I...I think I like you."
"Blergh!" Monokuma shouted, ruining the moment.
"You ruined it!" Usami whined.
"Great acting Peko!" Junko called out to the duo.
"A-acting?" Fuyuhiko asked.
"Um...yes!" Peko answered. "J-just an act!"
Usami puffed her cheeks at Monokuma and Junko who were trying hard to hold in their laughter.
"I suppose it's just the three of us now." Kyoko said to Taka and Sakura. "Let's just head back to the school and call it a day."
Sakura and Taka nodded and the trio made their way back to school, Junko and Mukuro following them. With everyone but Usami gone, Monokuma turned to the camera.
"And there you have it. This ends the group date. Now for one last confession." He turned to Usami.
"N-no!" Usami screamed.
"Usami…" Monokuma whispered.
"Stop this right now!"
"I think that…"
"Before it's too late! Please, Monokuma!"
"You should kill yourself Monomi! Ahahahaha!"
"What?" Usami remained frozen in shock.
"See you all next time!"
Next time on Hope's Peak Variety Show, the student council make an entrance to the show. Join the seventy seventh and seventy eighth class as they offer feedback as to how to make the school a better campus.
"Add a buffet table to every classroom!"
"Add doughnuts to the kitchen!"
"Too much hope! Add despair!"
"These are just selfish requests!"
(A/N) It was fun writing this chapter at first, but then it got boring. At least I got it done, right? So next episode, I will try and feature the student council! We didn't get much from episode 7 besides death but oh well. Let's just hope that it goes well. Thanks again for all the favourites, follows, and reviews! They mean a lot to me! See you all next time!