I want my family back.

I want my life back.

I want my brother…

My mom…

My friends…

I tossed and turned all night on my bed. Sleep wasn't an option right now, so why force it?

The Hokage should have killed me. The villagers are terrified of me; my classmates hate me and most think I should have died.

But no. The sharingan is valuable. It's a power that the elders would have wanted to keep to themselves should I ever procreate. It felt so liberating to kill them.

How was I to trust that they would even consider letting anyone from my family live? They easily demolished my entire clan; they could have done it again. It's only because of Tsunade that I trust that any family I could have would be safe. But it would be better if the sharingan ceased to exist altogether. No more darkness no more power to the world. No more family secrets or forbidden jutsu. No more pain.

Naruto was to become Hokage in one month. Tsunade was old and weak and could no longer hold the position, and Naruto was the perfect fit. Not to mention he earned his title and would uphold the position well. I heard his father did a pretty damn good job when he was Hokage.

And Sakura…was a medic. I don't think she was ever suited for killing anyone; she had a soft heart for anything capable of taking a breath. Hell, I remember her nursing a baby bird back in the academy days. Regardless, the occupation suits her well.

Her appearances haven't changed much at all from a distance…but up close I've seen so much more really has changed. Her hair darkened a bit with age and the scars that showed were just faint light pink scars, long been healed.

She hates me. She should hate me; she should fear me and she should have started a riot to have me killed. I will do anything not to have her acquainted with me again. Ignore her and insult her and call her weak. Sakura needs to forget me.

Why does she instill so many reactions I try not to show…her anger this afternoon was almost enough to make me loose my temper, and the chakra was still lingering around my fingertips. No matter what I won't hurt her.

Looking around my room I noticed that the walls were unnervingly bare since this was supposed to be a temporary solution. The only natural light filtered through the gossamer curtain covering the barred window on the west wall. Artificial light was given by nothing but a tableside lamp, although it lit the small room sufficiently. Clothes had been given to me, standard issue clothing like sweat-pants, jeans, shorts and shirts. At least they were new and clean. I don't plan on embellishing them with my crest; I'll do that when the clothes are completely mine and not some ANBU issued clothing with tracking devices sewn in.

I need to sleep.

"She had a point, teme." Naruto cooked himself a bowl of ramen for breakfast. He needs ramen like a fish needs water, there's no point in trying to break a habit. "You need to stop moping around and move on."

I said nothing.

"Sasuke…" he pursed his lips and rolled his eyes. I just stared at my glass of orange juice and stayed silent.

"Why did you try to kill her?" he asked.

"She shouldn't have been there."

"She loved you."

"It doesn't matter. She was in the way."

"Is everything she does wrong in your eyes?"

"Depends." I took a sip. "She needs to stay safe in Konoha. Not poisoning her teammates to look for me." The orange juice was expired. I rose, dumped the juice down the sink drain and headed towards the door.

"Where are you going?" Naruto stood, trigger button at the ready. "You aren't allowed to leave without an escort." He slowly walked towards me, pocketing the small black device.

"Nowhere…I just need to get out of this house." I placed my hand on the doorknob. "Feel free to follow. I just need a walk." And out I went.

I walked aimlessly, not really thinking, not really aiming for any destination in particular, but I found myself staring at the ruins of what I used to call my home.

Caution tape surrounded the area. Abandoned and forgotten with all of the rubble still piled in the ground. The only difference was that the plants seemed to have more life in them now and he grass was unkempt and overgrown. No one seemed to want to go near this place. SO many deaths had happened here…I'm sure there have been rumors of ghost stories. Funny how the family that wanted to take over was stuck roaming it in the afterlife. I don't believe the rumors though. It's too quiet here. The calm after a storm, although the storm has long passed.

How many years has it been?

My hands grazed the edges of the wall, tracing the crack where my brother's kunai lodged into the rock; right into the heart of the Uchiha family crest.

There is this empty feeling of being here. Like there is nothing left for me in these ruins? No meaning, no ties to my old home. I felt hollow. I've left this place behind and I've been gone for so long that this place doesn't belong to me anymore. I don't belong here. The feeling of Home, of loss and sorrow has been replaced.

I can leave this place without regret or sadness.

I should have Tsunade-sama tear down the old housing; to build a memorial for my family. Including my dear brother.

Naruto was waiting for me outside the gate to the complex.

"Find what you were looking for Teme?"

I didn't answer.

Naruto rolled his eyes and started walking. I guess its time for lunch at Ichiraku. Again.

The walk was fairly quiet, mostly because villagers walking leisurely down the street would slow their pace as we walked by. They continued to stare at our backs, but they can rot in their own pathetic existences. I don't need sympathy or fear from anyone here in Konoha. What I need is silence; and my own apartment. There is too much noise here…

Naruto 's pace sped up as we reached the ramen stand…and we walked right past it?

"Sasuke there's someone you need to see."

"Oh?"

Naruto's face grew solemn as he walked towards an old building. It was partially worn and aged but half of it had been completely reconstructed and rebuilt. The old clearly separated from the new but connected together by the framework nonetheless. I remember seeing Shikamaru up here, cloud gazing and thinking, The Lazy Genius. Hn.

We scaled the fire escape to get to the rooftop of the building, where Shikamaru was sitting on the floor alongside of Kurenai and the woman from Sand, Temari if I remember correctly. In his arms was a small child, no older than 3 or 4, trying to learn how to set a simple trap.

"Sasuke, huh?" Shikamaru nudged the child off of his lap to stand, the little girl jumped up with a smile and ran to Kurenai and Temari on the bench. "It's been a while." He brushed himself off.

"7 years, just about." I nodded in his direction. "Is she yours?" I gestured towards the kid.

"Hm? Oh, no, not at all" He pointed towards Kurenai, "She belongs to Kurenai and Asuma-sensei. Conceived right before his battle with Akatsuki." Shikamaru looked lovingly at the child. "She's my student, Asuma left her under my care" he smiled a bit.

"So, what are you two here for?"

"Just introducing Sasuke to the newest Konoha ninja" Naruto grinned. No, this meeting was much more than that. He was showing me our future, the hope and will we entrust the new generation with. We will have to pass along everything to this new generation, regardless of anyone's past mistakes and failures, in order to build a stronger village.

"We'll see you later, alright Shikamaru?" Shikamaru nodded. "Nice seeing you Temari-chan! You too Kurenai-sensei!"

Kurenai laughed, "Nice seeing you again Naruto." Her daughter waved at him shyly, and Naruto waved back with a grin.

As we walked back towards the apartment we passed by the Yamanaka flower shop, where through a window I could see a back door closing on a mop of strawberry blonde hair and a half gone bottle of sake. Sakura took a large swig of the bottle and reclined on the employee couch before the door finally shut.

"You and Sakura need to make peace, Sasuke." Naruto said. "Right now I'm pretty sure she'd rather die than forgive you but…" he shook his head.

"Things would be much simpler if she never forgave me."

Naruto and I kept walking in silence until we reached the door to the apartment.

She really shouldn't forgive me for what I've done. No one would blame her for shunning me. Despite this attraction I admittedly have for her…my world would be much easier if I were alone. Having her hate me is something I deserve; I would feel guilty and selfish if she loved me again. I can't give her what she needs.

Fuck me.

I sat down on the shitty spring mattress the ANBU issued us, it's cheap and I always wake up with a kinked shoulder or neck.

Naruto walked in with a cup of instant ramen in his left hand, a pair of chopsticks in the right, mouth half full.

"Shashke shoo meed shto shpeak wish shakura-shan" he swallowed. "I want you both at my wedding. COOPERATING." He pointed at me with his chopsticks and then took another bite.

"Wedding?" Since when...?

"Me and Hinata of course! In 3 months she will be my Miss Hinata Uzumaki!" Naruto grinned from ear to ear. "I want you to be my best man Sasuke."

No. No, no, no I can't be your best man. I betrayed you. I tried to kill you! Why are you trying to make me feel like this is a team again, Naruto! We're not a team anymore. We're broken! You want me to see you smiling and happy with your wife walking down the isle…I can't do it… I shut my eyes and hung my head in my hands.

"Please, Sasuke. It's all I'm asking." He sat next to me and placed his hand on my shoulder. "One huge favor. You know I already forgave you for everything."

"… I can't."

"Think about it…alright?" He flashed me a smile and left me there…

Damn it all.