Leg 3: Roast Nuna
Previously on The Amazing Race…
…Eleven teams took off from Dagobah to their first pair of Roadblocks on the ice world of Hoth…
"Oh, the race! How could I have forgotten it? I'm on it, Cad."
"They don't pay me to wait on slowpokes!"
…At the tauntaun colony, Lagos took multiple tumbles…
"If this thing throws me one more time, I swear I'm gonna personally gut it after the challenge!"
…While Katooni enjoyed the experience thoroughly…
"This big guy's kind of bouncy."
…Then, while hunting wampas, Embo finished the job like a professional, while Sabine made it into an art form…
"Kwah!"
"Can't rush an artist, especially one who's having fun."
…As a result of his professionalism, Embo and Sugi dived into first place and came out the winners…
"Sugi, Embo, I am pleased to say that you are team number one!"
…While the other bounty hunters narrowly made it in time to stay in the race, leaving Zeb and Chopper in disappointment.
"Zeb, Chopper, I'm sorry to say you are the last team to arrive. And you have been eliminated from the race."
"Serves you right, Chopper old boy."
"BLEEP-BOOP-BEEP!"
Good Bounty Hunters Steal First Place; Dysfunctional Rebels Sent Packing
Ten teams remain. Who will be eliminated next?
"This is Hoth, the sixth planet of the star system of the same name, and one of the most well-known ice worlds in the galaxy," said Dexter Jettster, "Sugi and Embo came in first in the lastLeg of the race, and will depart first for the Hoth Spaceport."
Sugi and Embo: Good Bounty Hunters; 1st to Depart
"Here we are, Embo," said Sugi, "leaving the beautiful ice world of Hoth."
"Kawh twek ta!" said Embo as they ran toward the spaceport from their taxi.
Suddenly, as they ran on a particularly slippery ice patch, Sugi slipped and twisted her ankle.
"Aahh!" she cried, almost falling over. Embo walked to her side to check out how she felt.
"I'm all right, Embo," she said, "I just took a fall. A rather big fall, but I'm fine. I was afraid my ankle broke, but it seems all right enough for me to continue racing."
Kanan and Hera: Rebel Leaders; 2nd to Depart
"Hera, you ready to go?" asked Kanan.
"Yeah, Kanan," Hera replied, "I want to get off this ice cube and into a space cruiser as quickly as possible! Ice worlds don't agree with Twi'leks, you know."
"Yeah, I know, that cold wind really gets to your lekku," said Kanan. "Listen, don't worry about it. Our next clue says that we're going to Saleucami, a much warmer place."
"That's good to hear," said Hera.
Satine and Bo-Katan: Mando Sisters; 3rd to Depart
"Relax, sister," said Bo, "We'll be off this ice ball any time now."
"I hope so," said Satine, "I almost wish I was back on Mandalore where the temperature's always comfortable."
Ezra and Sabine: Young Rebels; 4th to Depart
"Come on," said Ezra, "Let's catch up to Kanan and Hera!"
"I was about to say that myself," said Sabine.
"See? You don't always think of things before I do, Sabine," said Ezra.
"Hey, we just overtook the Mando Sisters!" Ezra commented with ecstasy.
"And there's Kanan and Hera just ahead!" said Sabine.
Kanan and Hera/Ezra and Sabine
"Hey! Kanan! Hera! You wanna split a cab?" Sabine shouted.
"It couldn't hurt the race, you know," said Ezra.
Hera shrugged. "Why not? Let's do it, Kanan. Anything to get out of this cold."
"I'm game if you are, Hera," said Kanan.
Qutee and Wack: Droid Team; 5th to Depart
"This planet almost froze my joints," said Wack in their cab. "But now, I think we can enjoy a ittle bit of nice, warm time on another world. How does that sound, Qutee?"
Qutee chirped cheerily.
"Me too, Qutee," said Wack. "Hey, wait a minute! Those little younglings have just passed us by in their own taxi! Driver! We must put the pedal to the medal!"
"Sorry, DUM droid," said the driver, who didn't care much for droids, "I can only go so fast in these wind gusts."
"Shucks," said Wack, "It just goes to show you that anything can happen in a fair race."
Katooni and Petro: Younglings; 6th to Depart
"Lead dog, baby! Head of the pack!" Petro shouted as he and Katooni passed the droids' taxicab. Katooni cheered loudly.
The driver winced. "Keep it down, you little brats!" he complained, "I have sensitive hearing, especially in this small space. You want me to go deaf, or something?"
Katooni and Petro quieted down, but Katooni squinted at the back of the driver's head. "Leave it to a sensitive cabbie to wreck the mood."
"Yup," agreed Petro, "Taxi drivers just aren't meant to run races."
"I heard all that!" the driver said.
(The first six teams made it to the spaceport and began to board the ship.)
Kanan and Hera: Rebel Leaders
"Well, it looks like all of the teams on the first flight have caught up to us," commented Hera to Kanan, "We've got Ezra and Sabine, the Droid Team, the Younglings, and the Good Bounty Hunters."
Sugi and Embo: Good Bounty Hunters
"Hello, guys," said Sugi, as she winced from a pain coming from her ankle.
"Oh my gosh," said Sabine, as she saw the injury to Sugi's ankle.
"Whoa!" said Kanan.
"Oh my goodness!" said Petro.
Katooni stared with a gaping mouth.
"I should say," said Wack, "That definitely does not look right. Her ankle is very big, and not the right color."
"Don't worry about me, guys," said Sugi, "Worry about yourselves. This is a race, after all. Besides, it's not really an injury. It's more like a flesh wound."
The other teams were caught off guard by Sugi's black humor, and only Embo instantaneously thought it was funny.
"Of course, I've got to elevate it for a while and let it relax, or I'll find it harder to run the rest of this race," Sugi remarked as she sat down. A droid stewardess provided her with a footrest.
"Sentients, please prepare for takeoff," the pilot droid informed them, and soon enough, the flight was leaving Hoth en route to Saleucami.
Satine and Bo-Katan/Ahsoka and Lux/Lagos and Soniee/Echo and Fives/Cad Bane and Robonino
"Great to see you guys!" said Ahsoka.
"I'll say," said Lagos, "We all missed the first flight, which means we're stuck behind the other five teams now."
"True," said Robonino, "We're all in the same boat!" He laughed at his own joke.
Satine looked at him uneasily. "I don't know whether or not to laugh at a bounty hunter's humor," she said quietly to her sister.
"Aw, don't worry about it," replied Bo-Katan, "Remember, we're here to win the million. We're not here to make more friends than we already have; we're here to win the race."
"Why didn't I ever think of that?" said Satine sarcastically.
"Beats me," said Bo.
"Who needs friends when you have brothers?" said Echo.
"Beats me, brother," said Fives.
"This is the Capital City of the star system and kingdom of Saleucami," said Dex. "When the teams arrive, they must find a lot full of marked landspeeders, and drive them to the wetlands due south of the City using no more than 1/5 of a gallon of fuel. If they succeed, they can go straight on to the next Detour, where they must choose between Herd Toasts or Nuna Roasts. In Herd Toasts, teams have to prod a herd of eopies through a field of fences, and into a pen, and then they must take a branding tool, heat it up, and brand each eopie on its rump with the appropriate symbol of the farm they are working on. Once all of the eopies are in the pen and branded, the local farmer will hand them their next clue. In Nuna Roasts, teams have to catch a healthy nuna bird on a farm and properly cook it according to a farmer's recipe. Once it has been properly cooked according to the recipe without being burned, the farmer will hand them their next clue. If, however, they fail to drive under 1/5 of a gallon of fuel to the wetlands, they must first run to a field 1/3 of a mile east of the northern edge of the wetlands, and correctly answer a trivia question about the history of Saleucami. Then, they may go on to the Detour."
(The first flight arrived on Saleucami. The five teams poured out, with Sugi moving the slowest due to her crippled ankle. They found the Route Info clue just outside the terminal where they were left off.)
"Detour: Herd Toasts, or Nuna Roasts," read Hera.
"Let's do Herd Toasts," said Kanan. "Nuna Roasts sounds like a cooking class, and cooking isn't one of my stronger suits."
"Okay, Kanan," agreed Hera.
"Let's try out Herd Toasts," said Sugi.
Embo grunted, as usual.
"I say we do Nuna Roasts," said Ezra.
"Sure, why not?" said Sabine. "I bet you just can't resist, can you?"
Ezra blinked. "How did you know, Sabine?"
"Nuna Roasts is more my speed," said Satine.
"All right, then," said Bo-Katan.
"Nuna Roasts," said Petro.
"Definitely Nuna Roasts," agreed Katooni with an eager look on her face.
(Above the spaceport, the marked landspeeders were parked and ready to go. Each team soon piled into one and began to drive, with the Rebel Leaders and the Mando Sisters in the lead.)
Satine and Bo-Katan: Mando Sisters
"I hope you know how to get us there efficiently enough," sais Satine, "Because I surely don't want to run around finding some stranger to answer a trivia question about this planet's history."
""Relax, sis," said Bo-Katan nonchalantly, "I'm an experienced driver and pilot as well as a good soldier. I know how to get us there efficiently enough."
"I hope so," replied Satine.
Kanan and Hera: Rebel Leaders
"It's a good thing that I've had plenty of experience flying ships and driving speeders," said Hera, "So I'm sure I can get us there in no time at all."
"I have every faith in you, Hera," said Kanan. "I always have."
Ezra and Sabine: Young Rebels
"I hope you know how to read a landspeeder's mileage, Sabine," said Ezra, "Because I sure can't."
"Ezra," said Sabine passively, "Relax. If I can design a paint bomb, surely I can get us to the wetlands in no time at all."
"Maybe," said Ezra, "But I want this speeder to get us there in one piece, not to blow up in our faces along the way with lots of ink and paint mixed with our blood!"
Sabine sighed. "You worry too much, Ezra," she said.
"Maybe you don't worry enough," Ezra countered.
Sugi and Embo: Good Bounty Hunters
"As a bounty hunter who charges by the minute," said Sugi to Embo, who drove their speeder, "I can tell that you're using more mileage than we should."
"Twis dee gant, stibt separae!" Embo snapped.
"Don't give me that, Embo!" retorted Sugi, "If you're as smart as I am, you should've noticed that for yourself!"
The second flight is arriving…
"Detour: Herd Toasts or Nuna Roasts?" read Wack.
Qutee beeped.
"Herd Toasts? Okay!" said Wack.
"Herd Toasts, for sure," said Robonino.
"I'd love to do Nuna Roasts, Ahsoka," said Lux.
"Okay, me too," said Ahsoka.
"Let's do Nuna Roasts," suggested Soniee.
"We're going to do Herd Toasts," said Fives.
Kanan and Hera: Rebel Leaders
They had just reached the wetlands. A Twi'lek farmer looked at their mileage gauge.
"You managed to drive efficiently," he said, "You can move on to the Detour, a little farther south. You can easily make it on foot."
"Thanks. Thanks a lot," said Kanan.
Satine and Bo-Katan: Mando Sisters
"Did we do all right?" asked Satine nervously.
The farmer checked their gauge. "Yes, you have," he said.
"Oh, good," said Satine. "Let's get going!"
Katooni and Petro: Younglings
Katooni looked at the farmer with big, puppy dog eyes when she and Petro arrived. "I hope we did fine, sir. I am only a little kid, you know. I'm not an experience driver."
"I'm sorry, but you haven't driven efficiently enough," he said. "You must go and answer the trivia question before you can go on to the Detour."
Katooni's face fell.
"Oh, come on, Katooni," said Petro, "It's not that hard. All we have to do is answer one small question about Saleucami, and we're on our way."
They ran to the place where a female Mirialan farmer waited for them. "I only hope that the question is one we can answer."
They came up to the farmer, and she asked them the question:
"Which Jedi Master was killed on Saleucami as part of Order 66?"
Katooni looked more than a little disturbed by that. "Petro, you answer it," she said.
"Why can't you help me?" asked Petro.
"Because it's a troubling question, and so is the answer, all right?" she burst out. "I know which Jedi Master died here at the end of the Clone Wars, but she was very close to me, and I just can't bear to answer a question that seems to mock her existence by being called a 'trivia question!' Just answer it, Petro. I'm sorry if I'm holding us up."
"All right," said Petro, "After all, I'm your friend, not your brother." He turned to the Mirialan woman and answered the question as soon as he figured out who it had to be. The fact that the Master was close to Katooni made it relatively easy for him to figure it out. That, and his knowledge of the galaxy's history helped out immeasurably.
"Stass Allie."
"Correct," said the farmer. "Go on to the Detour."
"Thank you, Petro," said Katooni gratefully.
Kanan and Hera: Rebel Leaders
"You think that's it, Hera?" asked Kanan, pointing to a bunch of farms clustered together over a wide space of land.
"It must be," she said, "It's the location the clue pointed out to us."
"Hey! Need any help there?" called a voice that sounded strangely like a clone trooper's voice.
They turned and saw an aging man dressed in farmer's fatigues, standing outside his farm with his wife and his mostly grown children, human/Twi'lek hybrids.
"Yeah, we could," said Kanan, walking over and shaking the clone farmer's hand. "We're in a race, and our latest clue told us to come here to do a Detour."
"No problem," said the man, smiling amiably, "I'm Cut Lawquane. This is my wife, Suu Lawquane, and our two kids, Shaeeah and Jek. There are enough farmers for each team here, whether they choose Herd Toasts or Nuna Roasts."
"Well, we've chosen Herd Toasts," said Hera. "As long as we met you first, how about we herd and prod your eopies, sir?"
"It would be our pleasure," said Suu.
"By the way," asked Hera, "Why is it that a Jango Fett clone is a farmer instead of a soldier for the Empire? I thought clones couldn't desert."
"That's a long story, I'm afraid," said Cut, "One that the race doesn't allow the time for me to explain. But it is possible for it to happen, although it happened quite rarely. Now come on. I'll get you a prodding tool, and you can get started with our eopies."
"Can we help out, daddy?" Shaeeah asked.
"Please?" said Jek.
"No, you can't," said Suu, "This challenge is for the racers to do by themselves. Now please get back to your chores, both of you."
"Yes, mom," Shaeeah and Jek submitted.
It appeared that Cut and Suu's children hadn't entirely grown up yet to Hera and Kanan.
Satine and Bo-Katan: Mando Sisters
"There it is!" said Satine, "The farmland!"
"Aye aye, m' lady," said Bo-Katan dryly, and they came up to another one of the farmers.
"We choose you and your farm," said Satine. "We're going to do Nuna Roasts."
"Okay," said the farmer, "Come on inside my homestead, and I'll provide you with a bird and my recipe."
"Great," said Bo, "We're going to cook a nuna."
Cad Bane and Robonino: Bad Bounty Hunters
"Can't you understand how to read a mileage gauge, Cad?" demanded Robonino in their speeder.
"I'm not used to such ridiculous things, fish face!" said Bane. "Now leave me alone! I know what I'm doing."
Qutee and Wack: Droid Team
"Do you think you can get us there under 1/5 of used fuel in a gallon, Qutee?" asked Wack.
Qutee beeped in the affirmative.
"Excellent!" said Wack.
Katooni and Petro: Younglings
"Wow! These farms are beautiful!" said Katooni.
"They sure look like a fun place to visit," said Petro.
They chose a farmer, and told him that they wanted to do Nuna Roasts.
Sugi and Embo/Ezra and Sabine
"I'm sorry," said the mileage farmer, "but you haven't driven efficiently enough, either of you."
"Well, I guess we've gotta answer a question now," said Ezra.
"Sometimes you have a flair for the obvious, Ezra," remarked Sabine.
"This won't be a problem, Embo," said Sugi, "We know plenty about galactic history."
They rushed to the farmer with the question, and she recited it to them. She also said that only one team at a time could answer it, that one team's answer couldn't account for the other team's place in the race, and that no eavesdropping was allowed.
Sugi and Embo went first. "I believe that would be Jedi General Stass Allie," said Sugi.
"Correct," said the farmer.
"Great," said Sugi. She and Embo moved on.
Ezra didn't know the answer at all, but Sabine could remember some details about the fall of the Jedi Order, in spite of being only two years old when the Order was given.
"Stass Allie, I think," she said.
"Correct," the farmer repeated.
"How did you know that, Sabine?" asked Ezra.
"Mandalorians like myself often talk about how foolish each Jedi General was to take command of a slave army," said Sabine, "And some of them said the Jedi deserved what they got."
Ezra looked depressed by that. "O-kayyy," he said, "I hope this doesn't mean that you're against Jedi too, Sabine. Please tell me you're sympathetic towards Jedi."
Sabine rolled her eyes as they ran. "Well, I can live with the existence of Jedi if they prove themselves to be good, trustworthy people. Why else do you think I look up to Kanan, or that I was willing to befriend you, even if you are a little annoying."
Ezra rolled his eyes in turn. "I don't know if I'll ever get anywhere with Sabine."
Qutee and Wack/Cad Bane and Robonino/Echo and Fives/Ahsoka and Lux
"Congratulations. You've driven efficiently enough," the mileage farmer said to the Droid Team and the ARC Troopers. To the Freedom Fighters and the Bad Bounty Hunters he said, "I'm sorry, but you haven't driven efficiently enough."
The droids and the clones rushed off to the Detour, while the bounty hunters and Ahsoka and Lux went looking for the question lady.
Once more, she recited the question for each team.
Bane answered first. "It was Jedi Allie. She and her cousin, Gallia, were real fools, too."
Ahsoka grimaced at Bane but said calmly, "Jedi Master Stass Allie."
"You're both correct," said the farmer. "You're free to go on."
Back at the spaceport…
Lagos and Soniee: Mando Cadets
"Where's the bloody speeder?!" Soniee said loudly. She almost yelled it.
"We gotta find it very soon," said Lagos, "Or we're gonna lose! I don't want to end up in the dregs in this leg!"
"I'm as frustrated as you are, Lagos, believe me," said Soniee impatiently, "But we can't afford to overreact too much. Frustration gets us nowhere. We still have one more place to check."
"Yeah, right," said Lagos, "I'd just love to see you find what isn't there, Soniee. You're practically a magician with your techno experience."
"Don't compare me to a sorcerer, Lagos," said Soniee warningly, "We're Mandalorians, not Jedi or Sith. Look, here's the roof of the parking lot. There's some landspeeders up here, too."
"This is ludicrous!" said Lagos.
"Wait! Look over there! There's a marked landspeeder! I told you they had to be somewhere!" said Soniee.
"All right, all right!" Lagos submitted, "So you were right after all. Let's just get this show on the road."
In the speeder, Soniee remarked, "Lagos still owes me an apology."
"I said you were right, okay?" said Lagos irritably.
"That isn't an apology," said Soniee flatly.
Kanan and Hera: Rebel Leaders
"They sure look like good eopies to me," said Hera.
"Let's hope so," said Kanan. Together they started to try to herd the eopies into the pen, with Kanan handling the prod.
The alien cattle bolted in several directions.
"Whoa!" shouted Kanan. "Easy there, big fellas, easy. We don't want to hurt you."
"At least not beyond branding you, anyway," said Hera.
One of the eopies screamed and ran over to a corner of the field.
"I don't think you should've mentioned that, Hera," said Kanan.
"Sorry."
Ezra and Sabine/Sugi and Embo
"Oh, this is going to be easy and fun," remarked Sugi.
Embo seemed to disagree, judging on his haughty grunt.
"Relax, Embo," said Sugi, "They're just cattle; what could happen?"
"I always wanted to make and eat a nuna roast," said Ezra.
"Me too," said Sabine, "But I'm afraid we're not allowed to eat the nuna we cook, just cook it and give it to the farmer."
"Not even a little taste?" asked Ezra.
"Not even a little taste," said Sabine.
"Aw, shucks," said Ezra.
Qutee and Wack/Cad Bane and Robonino/Echo and Fives/Ahsoka and Lux
"We choose your farm," said Wack to a farmer. "We're doing Herd Toasts."
"Herd Toasts," said Fives.
"Herd Toasts," said Bane.
"Nuna Roasts," said Lux.
Lagos and Soniee: Mando Cadets
"It's about time we finally got here," said Lagos, "I was afraid you got us lost again."
"Relax yourself, Lagos," said Soniee, "We're here, and that's what matters."
They got out of the car, and for the last time the farmer checked the mileage.
"Congratulations," he said, "You're within the allotted mileage."
"Oh good," said Soniee, "Then that trivia question won't slow us down further."
Sugi and Embo: Good Bounty Hunters
"Hey, come on," shouted Sugi, "We just want you all to go in the pen."
Embo said something that may have been a little obscene as he helped her chase the eopies.
"I know this is embarrassing, Embo," Sugi replied, "But it has to be done if we're going to win this-aahh!" She fell over.
"I think my ankle injury is getting a little bit worse right now," she said.
Embo spoke to her.
"No, I don't need to rest now, Embo," she replied, "I can handle this."
Katooni and Petro: Younglings
"Roast nuna is one of my favorite foods," commented Katooni as she applied melted butter to her roast. It was already beginning to smell good.
"Mine, too," said Petro. "I hope we can take one home if we win this leg."
"It's too much to hope for," said Katooni, "But who knows? Maybe we'll get lucky."
They giggled together.
Ezra and Sabine: Young Rebels
"I didn't know Saleucami farmers made such intricate nuna meals," said Ezra.
"You didn't know that roast nuna is prepared with the utmost delicacy, Ezra?" Sabine shook her head. "Where have you been all your life?"
Ezra raised an eyebrow. "You don't recall, Sabine? Mostly hiding out on Lothal."
Satine and Bo-Katan: Mando Sisters
"Okay, it looks like everybody's here," said Satine uneasily, "We and the Rebel Leaders made it, and then, suddenly, everyone else does, too. I hope this nuna isn't too complex to cook."
"Same here," said Bo-Katan, "Although I've never eaten a nuna in my life, and I'm curious to know what the best roasts taste like."
"You might find out someday," said Satine, "Maybe even today."
Ahsoka and Lux: Freedom Fighters
"It's like hunting an akul," said Ahsoka, "A very tame, small one. My kind, the Togrutas, always hunt for our food, and we cook it the old-fashioned way usually, instead in an electric oven. This is a cakewalk compared to hunting the akul."
Lagos and Soniee: Mando Cadets
"Hey! Be careful with that thing, Soniee!" cried Lagos.
But it was too late. They had applied the butter and decorations satisfactorily, but when they tried to cook it, it was accidentally burned.
"I'm sorry," said the farmer, "But you must start again with a fresh nuna."
"This is silly!" Lagos said in a frustrated voice. " How can cooking a damn nuna be so hard?"
"Shut it, Lagos," snapped Soniee, "If you don't stop distracting me, we'll never win the race."
Lagos sighed.
Cad Bane and Robonino: Bad Bounty Hunters
Cad Bane and Robonino waded through the muck of the farmyard, chasing their eopies.
"I've never done such dirty work before in my life, Robonino!" Bane complained.
"You think you've got it bad," said Robonino with a squeal, "I'm so short, I'm literally swimming in dirt and manure here!"
"Well, then," Bane surmised, "Maybe the great Cad Bane is a little lucky for once."
Echo and Fives: ARC Troopers
"This isn't my kind of thing, Fives," said Echo. "I'd rather be in a much cleaner place, like Kamino."
"I know what you mean," said Fives, "We're not farm people. We grew up in a city with weapons and armor. I mean, how the heck are we supposed to herd these eopies into the pen, anyway?"
The eopies made a noise like an animal's laugh.
"Bad eopies!" said Echo, "Don't laugh at us, come on!"
Qutee and Wack: Droid Team
The farmer looked alarmed to see a pit droid with his prodding device chasing his cattle around.
"Baaa! Baaa!" Wack imitated the eopies. Qutee whistled a response.
"Qutee," said Wack, "Of course imitating their voices is going to coax them into the pen effectively."
Qutee spun her dome from side to side and showed him how it was done. She used her binary language to create a signal, one that the eopies listened to carefully. Then, they started to walk into the pen as a whole herd.
"Qutee, you are a genius!" Wack said, jumping up and down, almost hitting Qutee with the prod.
"Do be careful with that prod, droid!" shouted the farmer angrily.
"No problem, sir," replied Wack. "All I have to do is point it at the eopie's rump and press it against the rump for a second, right?"
The farmer glared at him. "I don't trust you to handle my cattle properly! You! Mech droid! Do the rest of the job for him!"
Qutee chirped affirmatively and took the branding tool, heating it up.
Sugi and Embo: Good Bounty Hunters
"Let's go, eopies!" said Sugi, "Go through the pen's door now!"
After a half hour of chasing rebellious eopies around, they finally started to go into the pen. Embo seemed pretty eager to end the challenge as quickly as possible, because he jumped over the fence with the heated branding tool and proceeded to brand each eopie, one by one, very rapidly.
"Hey, take it easy with my eopies!" cried the nervous farmer.
Embo saluted him, and finished the job just as fast, but with less kinetic force.
"Kon twahk!" he said triumphantly.
"All right," said the disturbed farmer, "Thanks for your help with my cattle. There is your next clue."
"All right!" said Sugi, "We're in the lead again!"
Embo chortled as they boarded their BARC speeders with their nuna.
"Teams must now take a nuna roast by BARC speeder transportation back to the Capital City. The teams who did Nuna Roasts will use the nunas they successfully cooked, while the teams who did Herd Toasts will be provided with one by their respective farmer. In this Roadblock, when they reach the outskirts of the City, a man will give each team a tray and a glass of fine wine, and they will attempt to carry the nuna and the wine balanced on the tray without dropping or breaking them, in the middle of a very busy, rush hour street. Their destination? The mayor's office. After they have handed the nuna and the wine over to the mayor, the mayor's assistant will hand them their next clue."
Cad Bane and Robonino: Bad Bounty Hunters
"Those other bounty hunters sure are fast," remarked Robonino.
"Don't worry about them," growled Bane, "Let's just get these dirty cattle into the pen sometime today."
Kanan and Hera: Rebel Leaders
"Easy, easy," said Hera, trying to soothe the eopies as Kanan branded them one by one. "You know, Kanan," she said to her friend, "I'm not sure I like it when farmers do this to their cattle, although I don't mean any offense against the Lawquane family at all."
"Me neither," said Kanan, "But for some farmers, this kind of practice is necessary, no matter how painful it is."
"I know," said Hera, "But that doesn't mean I have to like it."
After a few more moments, they finished the job.
"Thank you very much," said Suu, "You were a lot of help."
"Thanks for letting us use your farm, too," Hera offered. "I wish we had more time to spend together."
"Maybe we'll get the chance someday," said Cut. "You never know. Anyway, there's your next clue."
"Thanks a lot, Mr. Lawquane," said Kanan, "May the Force be with you and your family."
The Lawquanes handed over a thoroughly cooked nuna, and the racers rode away on their BARC speeders.
"It's good to almost be in the lead," said Hera.
Ezra and Sabine: Young Rebels
"I think I'm supposed to put this saffron or whatever it is on the nuna, right?" Ezra asked, after putting said ingredient on the nuna.
"Ezra!" cried Sabine, "You're not supposed to put that on a nuna roast! And why did you use oil instead of butter to flavor it?!"
"I'm sorry," said the farmer, "This isn't the way my family does it. You'll have to start over."
"I hope we're not going to be stuck here a very long time," complained Ezra.
"I hope you stop being ignorant of everything we come across in this race," complained Sabine back.
Katooni and Petro: Younglings
Katooni took her nuna roast out of the oven and breathed in the warm aroma with a satisfied smile.
"Mr. Farmer, sir," said Petro, "I hope this nuna roast is to your delectable satisfaction." He presented their finished roast to the farmer.
"That's great," said the farmer, "That's excellent, in fact. Here's your next clue."
"Yay!" Katooni and Petro cheered.
Satine and Bo-Katan: Mando Sisters
"We hope this is a good roast, young farmer," said Bo, "Because I don't enjoy doing the same thing twice in a row."
"Excellent, very good," said the farmer. "There's your next clue."
"Thank you," said Satine, pecking him on the cheek, which briefly drew the attention of his wife and kids. Soon they too were on their way.
Katooni and Petro: Younglings
"So that's how you fly a BARC speeder, then?" asked Katooni.
"Yup," said the farmer, "That's all there is to it."
"Then I guess we're ready to go," said Petro.
"Better hold tight to that nuna bird, Petro," said Katooni, "so we don't lose it."
"Don't worry about that, Katooni," said Petro, "I've got it all under control."
Qutee and Wack: Droid Team
Qutee was quarreling and dueling with Wack for possession and control of the branding tool.
"I can do it, Qutee!" he said. "Don't trouble yourself!"
Qutee gave him an electric shock to stun him, and then used her magnetic coil in her dome to wrest the tool away from him. Then she proceeded to slowly and easily brand each eopie, attempting to soothe them with some binary whistling and humming.
Lagos and Soniee: Mando Cadets
"Soniee! You burned the nuna again!" Lagos was almost livid.
"Be quiet!" Soniee snapped again, "This is not the time for a mental meltdown! Just relax, I'll get it next time."
"I find that impossible to believe," said Lagos in all sincerity. "It blows that we've prepared so hard for this race, only to be brought down by a stupid nuna!"
"Quiet," said Soniee through clenched teeth.
Ezra and Sabine: Young Rebels
"At last! I got the perfect roast roasted for you, Mr. Farmer," said Ezra, presenting their second nuna to the farmer.
"All right," he said, "I'm happy with that. There's your next clue."
"Oh boy," said Ezra, "We're going back to the Capital! This should be fun!"
"I don't know if I'd call carrying nuna and wine through a busy street fun, Ezra," said Sabine.
Cad Bane and Robonino/Ahsoka and Lux/Echo and Fives
"You've managed to take care of my cattle efficiently," said one of the farmers to Bane and Robonino, "There is your next clue."
"Good work, clones," said another farmer to the ARCs, "Here's your next clue."
"With great pleasure," said one more farmer to Ahsoka and Lux, "there's your next clue!"
Each of these three teams cheered before moving on. Ahsoka and Lux were the first to go.
Kanan and Hera: Rebel Leaders
"Okay, I think that's the guy with the trays and wine glasses," said Hera.
"Good," said Kanan, "Let's get it on."
The man with the tray and wine helped Hera get a good, steady hold on it, and gave her and Kanan general directions to the mayor's office.
"Thanks, sir," said Hera. They began to walk through the street.
It was indeed a busy street, with natives, tourists, businessmen, and Imperials to be found walking everywhere. Hera had to dodge an Ugnaught who was running from some stormtroopers.
"I hate having to witness these sorts of things while we're having fun in a race, Kanan," she said sadly.
"I do, too," said Kanan, "But at least we don't have to worry about our own hides for a while. And as for the people who are suffering, we just can't do anything right now. After we win the million, we'll more than make up for our neglect during the race."
Hera smiled as they walked on. "You always know how to make my day, Kanan."
Kanan smiled back. "I thought it was the other way around. Watch it!"
She had to dodge the incoming stormtroopers next.
Lagos and Soniee/Qutee and Wack
Soniee delicately took her third nuna roast out of the farmer's oven and placed it on his table.
He and his wife took a very close and careful look at it. The Cadets were pretty tense.
"Very good," the farmer said, "You finally managed to get it. There's your next clue."
Lagos and Soniee breathed a sigh of relief. "Thank you very much, sir," said Lagos. "Thanks," said Soniee.
Wack seemed to be sulking as Qutee put the last branding mark on the last eopie.
"Well, it's been a pleasure," said the farmer. "There is your next clue. And I hope I never see you again."
"Yes, sir," Wack saluted him. Qutee chirped and warbled.
Satine and Bo-Katan: Mando Sisters
Bo-Katan was handling her nuna and wine tray with grim determination. She was a pretty agile and nimble woman, but even her agility made it tricky for her to balance a tray and maneuver through a crowd.
"This isn't as easy as I thought it would be," she said to her sister.
"Just relax yourself," said Satine, trying to improve morale, "Don't shake with frustration or anger, and try to walk like you're walking on air. That might help you."
"It's nice to know that you have some childlike ideas on how to improve myself," Bo said sarcastically.
Ezra and Sabine: Young Rebels
"This should be easy," said Ezra. He had elected to hold the tray in this Roadblock.
"Don't get overconfident, Ezra," advised Sabine. "But if you think you can do it, knock yourself out."
Ezra chuckled. "Okayyy," he said uncertainly. He started to walk out into the street with Sabine close behind. But they got no further than thirty feet when Ezra was jostled by a rude passerby. He dropped the wine, but managed to save the nuna.
"NO! NO!" he cried.
"Come on, you dropped it! Let's go back!" Sabine said impatiently.
Echo and Fives: ARC Troopers
"Oof! Oooff! OOOOFF!" Echo grumbled as he lost his wine and nuna to another drunken wino.
"This isn't easy at all," he said, "I can't just run through them, like we could when fighting clankers in the Clone Wars. Any advice, brother?"
"I guess patience is the only thing that will work in the end," said Fives. "In a challenge like this, it's the best friend we've got."
"Yeah, you're right," said Echo. "Let's go back and get another nuna and more wine."
Ahsoka and Lux: Freedom Fighters
Ahsoka weaved through the countless hurried people without any problem.
"Amazing, Ahsoka! How do you do it?" asked Lux.
"It's something called echolocation," Ahsoka replied, "Togrutas like me can sense how to move efficiently in a crowded space, among many people or things. It's a great talent to have at a time like this." She grinned at him.
"Yeah, it sure is," said Lux. "Several teams got here ahead of us, and we're going to beat 'em anyway."
And indeed they did. A matter of minutes later, they made it to the mayor's office, and he gladly accepted the food and drink. Then his assistant gave Ahsoka and Lux their next clue.
"Go to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami."
"Teams must now figure out that the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami, a legendary, but devastating Outer Rim Siege during the Clone Wars, is the Saleucami Capital Cemetery, located on the opposite side of the huge Capital City, in a barren area surrounded by active geysers. This is the Pit Stop for this leg of the race. The last team to check in here...may be eliminated."
"Let's find this memorial, and fast!" said Ahsoka.
Sugi and Embo: Good Bounty Hunters
"No, I can't help you," said Sugi to Embo, "My ankle is still swollen and hurting. I could never hope to carry that tray through this crowd. Wait a minute...there's the mayor's office! Quick, Embo! Get in there before somebody knocks that tray over!"
Embo waved one hand impatiently and they rushed into the office. The mayor's assistant gave them their next clue. "Go to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami."
"Okay, let's go!" said Sugi.
"Okaie!" Embo responded.
Ezra and Sabine: Young Rebels
Ezra had managed to carry his tray a lot farther this time.
"Maybe you're better at this than I had thought at first," said Sabine.
"Aw, it's easy," boasted Ezra.
But he made the mistake of swinging his arms in a shrug, and he threw the tray. It crashed into an Aqualish, who snarled a curse in his own language at Ezra.
Ezra grinned uneasily. "Sorry, mister," he said, waving.
Sabine shook her head and pouted under her helmet. "You really are a clumsy oaf, Ezra."
Katooni and Petro: Younglings
Katooni didn't feel comfortable carrying her tray through the huge crowd of people.
"How many people have to be on the streets all at once at this time of day, anyway?" she wanted to know.
"Just remember your lessons about confidence, Katooni," suggested Petro. "I know you can do it. Just trust the Force, and walk through those people like they aren't even there, and it won't be any problem."
Katooni looked at him. "Well, if you have that much confidence in me," she said, "then I don't see why I can't have the same feeling. Thanks for the vote of confidence, Petro."
She steeled herself, and then she walked into the street, followed closely by Petro. She felt like she was flowing with the Force as people almost hit her, but the Force always guided her to the right direction to get out of the way, and she managed to continue balancing the tray perfectly at the same time.
Satine and Bo-Katan: Mando Sisters
"I hope that's the mayor's office," said Bo-Katan, "because my arms can't take this much longer."
"I think it is," said Satine. "Yes, that's our destination, all right."
"That's a relief," said Bo. She carried the tray inside to give to the mayor, and they soon received the same clue as the others.
Ahsoka and Lux: Freedom Fighters
"I think the best place to go to find out where this memorial is would be a library," said Lux.
"Sounds like a good idea to me," said Ahsoka, "Look over there! There's a public library. We can't check out any books, but maybe they'll let us take a quick look at one of the history books."
They ran into the library and asked a librarian where the history holobooks could be found. They chose one about Saleucami's history in the Clone Wars and immediately after. They soon read that the Siege's memorial grounds were the Saleucami Capital Cemetery.
The librarian showed them how to get there with a holomap, and they were on their way.
Qutee and Wack/Lagos and Soniee
"Watch it, Qutee!" Wack admonished his "girlfriend." "You are not as skilled as Artoo at carrying a tray of wine and food!"
Qutee beeped a raspberry at Wack.
Lagos dodged a wag on the street, just barely managing to keep her stuff on her tray. "Aren't you going to improve my morale, Soniee?" she asked.
"Nope," said Soniee.
"But why not?" demanded Lagos.
"Because you've been offering me the polar opposite of support for this entire leg," Soniee replied.
"I don't believe this!" shouted Lagos, "You've got to stop putting me through this claptrap, Soniee!"
Katooni and Petro: Younglings
"Go to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami," said the assistant.
"Great!" Petro and Katooni said together.
"See? I told you that you could do it," said Petro to Katooni.
"Yeah," Katooni responded, "Sometimes I really amaze myself."
Echo and Fives: ARC Troopers
"Look!" said Fives. "There's the office at last!"
"About time, too," said Echo, "I think my wrists are going to break from being frozen in this painful position."
They walked into the mayor's office. He was waiting for them. They presented him with his latest meal, and he smiled.
"I'm never going to be anybody's waiter again!" Echo said loudly.
"Go to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami."
"All right," said Echo, "Let's go to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami."
Ahsoka and Lux: Freedom Fighters
"That's it! That's it!" Ahsoka cried.
"You know, it's a little morbid that the Pit Stop of this leg of the race is a graveyard," remarked Lux.
They ran into the old burial grounds, and found Dex standing next to yet another Saleucami farmer, beside the memorial stone for all the clone troopers who fell in the battle.
"You think people like this could make good farmers when they get older?" Dex asked the farmer.
"I'll bet they would," said the farmer, "They're already hardy enough to be smugglers."
Ahsoka and Lux laughed. "I don't know if that's in our future or not," said Ahsoka, "But we'll keep a couple of open minds, just in case."
"Ahsoka, Lux, congratulations. You are team number one!" Dex proclaimed.
"Yes!" Ahsoka cheered. She and Lux hugged enthusiastically. "We won!"
"And as the winners of this leg of the race," continued Dex, "the two of you have each won an Alpha-3 Nimbus-class V-Wing starfighter of the Old Republic."
"Whoo!" said Lux, "We can find some good uses for those!"
"Yeah," said Ahsoka, "Those starfighters are better by far than the Imperial TIE Fighters, and we can use them against the Empire if we ever need to."
"And if we don't need to," said Lux, "we'll still be able to travel in style with them!"
Ahsoka and Lux hugged again.
Kanan and Hera/Ezra and Sabine
"Next time, Ezra, I'm carrying the tray," said Sabine upon their arrival at the mayor's office.
Ezra looked embarrassed.
Kanan and Hera were amused by this, especially Hera.
Both teams received the clue.
"Come on, Hera!" said Kanan. "We've got to get to that Pit Stop, and we're presently neck-in-neck with another team!"
"You're not getting ahead of us, Kanan!" said Sabine.
Both teams began to run.
Sugi and Embo: Good Bounty Hunters
"Let's try the library over there. I say this library is the best place to find out where the Pit Stop is," reasoned Sugi. "If you want to find a memorial ground, it's best to search in a public library with history books."
"Rawk ta khuok?" Embo asked her.
"Yes, that's it, Embo," said Sugi, "That's where we're going."
Qutee and Wack: Droid Team
"Really, Qutee!" said Wack, "You should learn better coordination for carrying a tray!"
"Go to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami."
"Come on, Qutee," said Wack, "We must go to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami."
Qutee warbled questioningly.
"I do not know where or what the memorial grounds are," said Wack, "We will find out."
Echo and Fives: ARC Troopers
"Somebody told us that the memorial grounds are somewhere at the other side of the City," said Fives. "We're almost there. Do you think we should check the cemetery first, or something else?"
"Cemeteries are so creepy. Let's just go in the old castle," suggested Echo.
They entered the old building to find that it was empty.
"It's certainly handsome, and quaint," remarked Fives.
"I wonder if it dates back to the Golden Age of the Old Republic," said Echo. "But it certainly isn't the Pit Stop."
"Definitely not the Pit Stop," agreed Fives.
Sugi and Embo/Satine and Bo-Katan
Sugi and Embo ran up to the Pit Stop mat, followed closely by Satine and Bo.
"Sugi and Embo, congratulations. You are tram number two!" said Dex.
"Excellent!" said Sugi. Embo voiced his agreement. They high-fives each other.
"Satine and Bo-Katan, you are team number three!"
The Mando Sisters looked very pleased to finally be ahead in the race.
Qutee and Wack: Droid Team
Qutee asked Wack where they should go to ask for directions.
"I believe that the best place to go for information is a public place with lots of knowledgeable people," said Wack. "I recommend that we try this cantina. It is always good to ask directions in a cantina."
Qutee didn't entirely agree, and reminded Wack that many cantinas had a "no droids" policy.
"Do not worry, Qutee," said Wack, "If there is any trouble, I will be there to rescue you from danger."
Qutee whistled to herself nervously.
Inside, many of the patrons sneered at the two droids.
"Excuse us," said Wack politely, "We are looking for directions to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami."
The bartender glared at him. "You do realize, don't you, that we don't serve your kind at this establishment?"
"Sorry, sir," said Wack, "But we are not here to cause any trouble. All we want is some friendly directions to-"
"I think I can help you," said a patron, a Lannik.
"Oh good," said Wack, "It is good to see that somebody is willing to help us out."
"A little to the east of here, within the city," explained the Lannik, "there is a square where several statues of various heroes of the Clone Wars are immortalized in stone. I believe that some of the statues are of heroes of Saleucami."
"Ah yes," said Wack gratefully, "Thank you so much, sir."
"Don't mention it, weirdo," the Lannik replied.
"And now I want you to beat it on out of my bar," said the bartender, "before I have to come out from behind here and throw you out myself!"
"No problem, Mr. Bartender," said Wack. "Come on, Qutee, let us go!"
Qutee warbled uncertainly, and followed him out.
Katooni and Petro/Kanan and Hera/Ezra and Sabine
The Younglings made it to the Pit Stop. Katooni was a little bit spooked by it, but she forgot her fear when she saw Dex and the mat.
"Katooni and Petro, you are team number four!" said Dex.
"Yeah!" the children cheered. Petro raised his hand in the air. Katooni wiped away a tear of joy.
The Rebel Leaders managed to outrun the Young Rebels in a footrace to the Pit Stop.
"Kanan and Hera, you are team number five!"
"Excellent!" said Kanan, smiling. Hera clapped her gloved hands.
"Ezra and Sabine, you are team number six!"
Ezra and Sabine clapped their hands together.
Cad Bane and Robonino/Lagos and Soniee
"You've got to learn how to walk straight, bubble brain!" Bane told Robonino as they finally arrived with their nuna and wine.
"If I had walked straight, we wouldn't be here right now, bluey!" Robonino replied.
"I can see we're not the only ones with communication issues today," remarked Soniee.
"Don't test me, Soniee," Lagos said, "I'm getting tired of your arrogance."
"Really? I thought you were the arrogant one," said Soniee.
"I resent that!" Lagos retorted.
They handed over their goods, and the mayor's assistant said one more time:
"Go to the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami."
"Come on, Robonino!" Bane roared. "We're probably close to last, and we're neck-in-neck with another team!"
"Don't try to stop us, bounty hunters!" said Soniee.
Echo and Fives: ARC Troopers
Somehow, Echo and Fives had managed to find the true Pit Stop.
"Echo and Fives, you are team number seven!" Dex announced.
"Great!" the clones said, and gave each other a brotherly hug.
Qutee and Wack: Droid Team
"Look over there, Qutee!" said Wack excitedly, "I think we have found the Pit Stop! There are the statues!"
Qutee sounded uncertain again.
"You do not see the mat, or Dex?" Wack asked.
Qutee beeped negatively.
"Well then," said Wack, "Let us look around and find them."
They walked up to a lady who was observing the statues. "Excuse me, ma'am," said Wack, "But this is the memorial grounds of the Siege of Saleucami, right?"
She looked at him in surprise. "No, of course not, you silly droid. This is the Heroes' Pavilion. War heroes are commemorated here. The Saleucami Capital Cemetery is where you want to go."
Quite whistled, as if to say, "I told you so."
"And where exactly is this cemetery, ma'am?" Wack inquired.
"Way off behind the rear of the City," she said, "In a barren patch not far from an old castle."
"You have got to be kidding me! Wack exclaimed. "Whoo! We are way off."
Qutee and Wack took off for the true Pit Stop. Quite told Wack something.
"You are right, Qutee," Wack agreed, "Bad directions are worse than no directions."
Qutee beeped a raspberry again.
Cad Bane and Robonino/Lagos and Soniee
Bane and Robonino managed to get to the mat a few minutes ahead of Lagos and Soniee.
"Cad Bane and Robonino, you are team number eight and you are still in this race!" said Dex.
"That's good to hear," said Robonino.
"It would be, if you would just learn to do your job better," said Bane coldly.
Shortly afterward, Lagos and Soniee ran up to the Pit Stop. Neither of them were smiling.
"You are team number nine, and you are still in this race," said Dex, hoping to raise their spirits a little. It didn't work very well.
"You don't look happy at all. Especially not you, Lagos," Dex remarked.
"I'm all right," said Lagos.
"We've been having some communication issues today," said Soniee. "And Lagos thinks that I'm harassing her or being a jackass or something."
"Is it that important to you to communicate better with each other?" asked Dex.
"Yes," said Soniee.
Lagos sighed, put her hand to her face, and turned around. "I can't do this anymore."
"Lagos, don't walk away," Dex urged.
"No! I can't do this! Why are you doing this to me!?" Lagos complained furiously.
"Don't walk away," Dex insisted.
"How am I supposed to do the things I'm supposed to do," demanded Lagos, "if my own best friend won't help me a little better than she is?"
The local farmer looked uncomfortable.
"Do you want to win the race, or not?" Dec asked firmly.
Lagos sighed again. "I want to win the race, but i can't do it with an unsupportive friend claiming I have communication issues."
"I'm sure we'll get over this, Dex," Soniee offered. "As soon as Lagos loses her pouty face and attitude, we'll be back up and running."
Lagos shook her head, still stone-faced.
Qutee and Wack: Droid Team
"Those guys sent us the wrong way," said Wack to Dex when they finally arrived at the Pit Stop.
Dex looked at the two hapless droids. "Qutee and Wack, I am afraid that you are the last team to arrive."
Qutee and Wack looked mournful, for droids, at least.
"But i have some good news for you," Dex continued, "This is a non-elimination leg, so you are still in this race!"
Qutee and Wack were ecstatic. They cheered in their own droid voices.
"That is so good to hear!" said Wack, "Would you not say so, Qutee?"
Qutee went crazy with joy.
Dex smiled. "However," he said next, "because you came in last, at some point during the next leg, the two of you are going to have to overcome a Speed Bump before you can move on."
"That is all right," said Wack, "If Corporal Wack and his pal, QT-KT, can survive a non-elimination leg by being the last team to arrive, we can handle any problem that tries to stop us!"
Qutee and Wack basked in the moment.
Next time, on The Amazing Race...
...Some teams take a pretty tough quiz, while others have to deal with raw meat...
"How can any sentient eat raw meat?"
"Politics are such a monster, Sabine!"
"I don't like the fact that we're working with the same race that Imperial Inquisitor is part of."
...And as the race goes on, Sugi's ankle injury gets worse, and puts the Good Bounty Hunters' race in jeopardy.
"Aahh! I fell again!"
"Toot takle?"
"My legs are failing me."
"Wakee nu shawk?"
"I've got a broken flipper here!"