Chapter 4

Ahsoka handed him another warm mug of tea and huddled near to him in the garden. He had been on alert ever since they had gone into to town and seen the garrison of troops there. Something in him couldn't rest because he feared what he knew they could accomplish. Ahsoka knew what they could accomplish as well, she remembered their perfect slaughter of all of her brethren in the jedi temple.

"You okay?" Rex asked quietly as his eyes scanned the horizon for the threat that he perceived to be just beyond his sight.

"Worried about you," Ahsoka said and placed her small arm around his waist, leaning into him. Why she would worry about such a strong man, only her heart knew.

"I'm fine," Rex said and then sipped the tea from the mug.

"You aren't. I can feel the distress in you, jedi or not."

Rex sighed and turned to look at her. His brown eyes scanned her face with a gentleness that most wouldn't think he could possess. It was there though. Rex had always been very kind to her from the time she had arrived to be General Skywalker's padawan. In fact, she remembered that Rex had been the only one who had been kind to her at that time. He was truly a stand out among men who all looked alike.

"I have a feeling we are going to have to leave here," Rex sighed and then sipped his tea again, his voice sure.

"I'm sorry," Ahsoka whispered and let go of him. She stepped away and looked towards the horizon, wrapping her arms around herself to make the shivers cease. It wasn't that she was cold, but the idea of leaving a home that she had lived in for so long, was making her shake. It was as though the escape from Coruscant was happening all over again. She felt that she would be ripped from the only life she had known in a very long time.

"Why would you be sorry? I should be the one ashamed because I'm not doing my duty," Rex said from behind her, his voice even and calm. "I'm not taking the precautions that we should take every day!"

"Not doing your duty?" she asked and whirled around to look at him. "You think this is all about duty and what you should be doing? I can't believe you! After all these years you just don't get it do you? I don't want you to do this for your duty. I don't want you to think that you owe anything to me because I'm a General."

Ahsoka felt the anger rising inside of her as she regarded the man before her. How could he be so naive? This didn't come down to how he had fumbled or the mistakes they both had made. This came down to two people trying to make their way in a world that was trying to destroy them. She looked at him and that childlike softness in his eyes made some of her anger melt away, but not completely.

"I didn't mean..." Rex started and then his voice trailed off as he considered what to say next.

Sometimes, Ahsoka forgot that he was a much younger man under the aging body. A body that was threatening to give way on him at any minute. Ahsoka tried to remind herself that he was still very young and didn't know much of the world. But she didn't know much about the world either and it should not be an excuse for him to not know how to deal with this situation. He would have to learn. They would both have to learn. So she opened her mouth.

"This has never been about duty. I'm here because you saved me. I'm here because you thought about me before yourself. Do you not know what is happening to you every single day? Can you not see that you are aging and will die far before me? Can you not see that it breaks my heart all the time?" Ahsoka felt the tears start to fall from her eyes and she fell to her knees. Rex approached her, but she pushed his arms away not wanting to have him touch her. This was something she had to say to him and he had to listen.

"You knew this," Rex said as he stood back from where she was crying. "You knew when we got involved that I was aging faster then the average person. You chose this! Ahsoka you wanted to be with me no matter what and now you tell that there are conditions? I warned you that this would happen and that my going before you would be difficult, but you didn't care. I let you convince me that it was okay."

"There are no conditions for my love. I love you and should I be punished for it? You are the air that fills my lungs and the beating of my heart. I don't want you to feel that you are doing everything out of duty to me. I want you to say that you are doing it because you love me. Because you want me to have nothing to worry about when you are gone. I want you to say you are doing it because you can't stand the idea of not being with me someday. Anything but duty!"

Her breakdown was really rather senseless. She was hurt because she felt that she loved him so much that she might explode, yet he continued to blather on about the duty that he felt to protect her. In some ways, Rex didn't really have any other words to speak about what he was doing. Clones were a rather unemotional group, by nature, but she thought that had changed in him. Evidently she was wrong and didn't understand men at all.

"I'm going to bed," she said sniffling and rising from the ground. Stalking off towards the room they now shared, Ahsoka undressed and climbed under the covers. She sobbed. She sobbed for all those people who were now gone and she would never see again. Ahsoka sobbed for herself because she felt the need to pity all that she was and all that she would never be. She sobbed for the love of a man who would not live to old age and someone she would have to bury, along with her heart.

"Ahsoka," Rex said sadly from the door. "Please don't cry."

Ahsoka didn't say another word, she continued to sob and pulled the blanket over her head. What she wanted was to block him from her mind, to not think about what was happening. It was better to ignore her feelings then have to deal with the pain that it was now causing her. Jedi didn't have emotions and new she knew why.

A hand reached over and laid on her back and then she felt his body warm, next to him pulling her close to him. She pulled the covers from her head, buried her face in his chest and sobbed more, until she couldn't sob anymore. Ahsoka then drifted off to a fitful sleep full of nightmares and red lightsabers.

The hallway was long and dark. Her head whipped from one direction to the other, but there was no exit. Small feet carried her away from what she perceived to be danger. Ahsoka could feel her headtails flopping against her shoulders as she hurried towards the end of the hall.

Then she heard it … screaming...screaming...screaming.

"AHSOKA!" Rex said as her eyes flew open and she looked at him with terror in her eyes. "It's just a dream."

"It was so real," she said breathing heavily as though she had been running.

"You're here with me," Rex said wrapping his arms around her and pulling her close to his chest.

Ahsoka let him hold her. Hold her and wipe away the chill from the nightmare. No she hadn't been there, but it sure felt like she was back there. She knew that just around that turn, there was someone waiting to take her away. Someone who she had treated so terribly before. What had come over her? What had made her lash out at him for doing what he thought was right?

"I'm sorry," Ahsoka finally said in a small voice.

"Sorry for what?' Rex chuckled at her, pulling away to look her in the eyes.

"I shouldn't have spoken to you like that before. I'm just so..."

"Frustrated?"

"Yes. This is happening so quickly and I don't know that it's even necessary. He wouldn't know me if he saw me."

Rex rolled onto his back and stared at the ceiling. Ahsoka could feel him going over what he was going to say. He wasn't angry, just worried. She admired how well he was keeping this all together.

"He would know you Ahsoka," Rex's voice was rather dark.

There had been a time when she had thought her former master dead. Died at the hands of Master Kenobi who had also perished. She had mourned them both for they had been mentors to her. Going on with her life, or what was called a life, Ahsoka had later found out quite a different story.

Rex didn't go into detail when she was younger. The details were very harsh. Master Skywalker had been burned almost to death. Master Kenobi was no where to be found. As she grew, Rex had elaborated on what had happened to Anakin and what he was now. She shivered at the thought of what he had become, but still somehow, she hoped that the true Anakin was there, just buried beneath a soul which didn't know what to do. That she had to hang onto. She didn't want him to be lost forever in the dark cavernous well of what he was now. Somehow she thought it was her duty to save him from that darkness.

"Then we should go," Ahsoka said nodding at Rex. 'It's for the best."

"It's not just for the best, Ahsoka," Rex said. "It's to make sure you are safe."

"Thank you Rex," Ahsoka said and raised her hand to stroke his face. "You never ask for anything in return and you never think about yourself."

"I do it because I love you Ahsoka. There is no other explanation."

They packed all they could carry into two packs and the rest they loaded into a small speeder. Ahsoka turned to look at their small house one last time. Rex was going through it again to make sure that all things that would identify them were removed.

"Seems we're all cleared out now," Rex said emerging from the door. He was limping a little and Ahsoka was a bit worried.

"You okay?" she asked grabbing him under the elbow.

"Just hurt my knee," Rex said bending down to rub at his knee. "Seems to be feeling a bit stiff this morning."

Ahsoka bit her lip. Rex was already showing signs of aging, but she had hoped that the physical signs would not show up for some time. Yes, this might have been just a stiff joint, but her mind jumped right to the fact that it was arthritis or something much worse.

"I'll be fine," Rex said winking at her as he hopped into the speeder. "You coming?"

Ahsoka hopped in next to him and they headed off to the city. They had decided to sell the speeder and several items in town so that they could get transport off of the planet. They would be moving towards the core worlds this time. It seemed that searches went in waves. When they were out on the outer rim searching, the core worlds were safer for someone who was on the wrong. So they were taking their chances and heading towards the core worlds.

Rex had chosen Naboo for their next home. They would live there among the peasants and travelers. Although he had never been there, it looked to be the best bet for them to survive.

"You have your papers?" Rex whispered to her as they entered a check point area. There was a sea of white from the troops. Rex pulled his goggles down over his eyes and placed a hat over his head. It wouldn't pay for him to be recognized by someone who had the same face.

"Right here," Ahsoka said and patted the neat pile of papers in her lap. She made sure to not have to dig through things and draw more attention to them than was necessary. She had learned long ago not to be nervous when she was in a tough situation. It didn't do anyone any good.

Ahsoka reached over and grasped Rex's hand sending him some calming through her touch. He wasn't one to be nervous either, but as of late, he had been more on edge. Perhaps seeing his former brothers in service to the Empire was a bit disturbing.

They waited in a line of several speeders. Each on was stopped and papers were produced. As the troopers approached their vehicle, Ahsoka smiled at them easily and waited for them to speak to Rex.

"Papers," the trooper said tersely and extended a hand towards Rex. The trooper went over the papers and handed them back to Rex. "Move along."

Easily they made their way into town and towards where they had planned to sell the speeder. After they received their money for the few things they had decided to sell from their old life, Rex took Ahsoka's hand and they made their way towards the holding area for transport away from the planet.

Ahsoka smiled easily at Rex as they found a bench to sit on and she huddled near to him. Rex stretched his arm out and put it around her, pulling her small frame closer to his body.

"Papers?" a trooper asked as he stopped in front of them. Ahsoka turned her blue eyes up at the faceless helmet, wondering just for a split second if this would be last time they would be asked for their identification.

Rex slipped the papers to the trooper and bent down to place a kiss on her forehead, just as any couple would do when faced with such a situation.

"What is your business on Naboo?" the trooper asked handing the papers back to Rex, who tucked them into his inside jacket pocket.

"Just want to spend our honeymoon in the grasslands there," Rex said evenly. His voice was similar to the one speaking to him from the helmet, but much of his accent had been lost in the time they had spent on this planet.

The trooper nodded and moved past them to the next group of people. Rex sighed a sigh of relief and held onto Ahsoka even more tightly. They waited until the trooper was out of earshot before they even spoke to each other.

"Honeymoon?" Ahsoka said and jabbed in the side with an elbow.

"I think you deserve as much," Rex laughed as he feigned pain in his side, although she was sure that he had barely felt it. Rex was tough and Ahsoka was just as tough. Two souls born of war and time spent in hiding.

"Well you haven't made me your wife yet," Ahsoka winked at him.

"The day isn't over yet."