Quack quack.

Speaking of random… Don't you think it's weird that our keyboards are called the QWERTY when Q is the least-used alphabet on the keyboard?

Thanks for the thumbs-up reviews by the way, can't tell you how heartening they are when you're publishing something that's nothing but purely the work of your insane brain you never trust for judgement… For the record though (thanks again, HappyWaifuHappyLaifu and welcome to FF net), it IS Magical Kitty Len-Len (otherwise known as Nuko Len-Len). :3

4. The Strawberry-Selling Girl

Len dreamt of rubber ducks falling from the sky. Huge fat ones, like flaming meteors. The whole sky was an angry red-black. Thunder boomed and lightning crashed. Dinosaurs of all kinds fled this way and that in terror as the earth bucked, quaked and split beneath their feet like a living thing finally waking up from its billion years of hibernation.

One huge, colossal strawberry appeared in the sky, hideous red and blistery, slowly rotating as it came falling above the heads of the puny reptiles like a dictum of doom.

'Hey – kid. Kid! Wake up.'

He woke up to someone lightly slapping his face. He blinked confusedly into a pair of blue eyes that looked exactly like his.

'I think… I just had a prophetic dream…' he mumbled blankly at the familiar eyes, 'Giant strawberries are going to fall from the sky and destroy Triassic Planet Earth. They are currently orbiting the Sun in the proximity of Jupiter…'

'Kid! Y'alright? Wake up! Bet you've been eatin' too many strawberries.' The person gave him a tight slap.

Len's drowsy eyes widened. 'R…Rin…?'

The person did a double-take. 'Holy shit. How the hell'd you know my name?'

'What's going on…' he croaked, rubbing his eyes.

'Don't tell me you're psychic or somethin'.' Rin studied him from various angles, and rapped a knuckle against his skull.

'Ow.'

'How. The hell do you know my name, kid?'

Rin's trademark hair-ribbon was missing. Her blonde hair was shaggy and wild, framing her face like a mane; she wore a rather un-ladylike crooked scowl on her face; and was wearing a dirty pair of shorts, a loose sackcloth shirt and a pair of wooden clogs. A few strands of straw were sticking out of her side pocket, and she reeked of freshly-picked oranges.

'What the hell happened to you?' Len asked dazedly.

'No. The question is, what the hell happened to you?'

'What do you mean? …Where the hell am I, anyway?'

'You're on the ground.'

'Wow. I just noticed.'

'No, serious – I thought you were dead or somethin'. You're in the market square – where else?'

'What market square?'

'The market square. It's called the Market Square. The Royal Fort Town Market Square in Constantinopolis.'

'Where?'

'Oh – the King named the capital after his pink rabbit plushie.'

'…?'

'He's five.'

'Ah.'

He seemed to be sitting up against a stone wall in a corner of a somewhat dirty street. The smell of horse-dung filled his nose. There were rickety wooden stalls set up with heaps of vegetables, lining the walls of the Square. Crowds of people bustled around, ranting coarsely, carrying sacks, bags and wheeling dusty wheelbarrows. Occasional horse-drawn carts rattled by. The horses' iron-shod hooves clopped loudly on the pastel grey cobblestone.

The Market Square was on top of a hill. When he looked over the wall, Len could see vast acres of yellow-green farmland spreading out into the horizon some ways below, dotted with typical red-roofed cottages and cows. The sky was as blue as the Windows wallpaper. On the opposite side up on the peak of the hill stood a stout white Disney-style castle with princess-blue pinnacles. The pearly walls were gleaming and spotless. Len assumed that was where Prince Charming lived.

It seemed that his choice of the plain strawberry over the gold and silver ones had brought him some good fortune after all. It seemed that he would be going home quite soon.

'Come on, kid. You'd better get up or your strawberries are gonna wilt soon.'

'Strawberries?'

'These.' Rin thrust a huge basket full of strawberries in his face. 'They're yours, aren't they?'

Len blinked dumbly at it.

'Come on, kid – get up.'

Rin – who was somehow not Rin – tried to prop Len to his feet, somewhat failing. He flopped back down on his bum.

His gaze slowly travelled up her figure, slowly taking in the details. There was something – something he couldn't name – wrong about her.

Then he realised it.

'Wait… You're not a girl?'

'Of course I'm not! Damn… You must'a hit your head real hard. How the hell do I look like a girl?'

Len clutched his head. 'What the hell…'

He hadn't noticed at first – since she was flat-chested anyway. The male version of Rin looked remarkably unchanged, aside from his wild hairstyle.

'Aw, come on. Don't tell me you were havin' a girl-crush on me or somethin'.'

'What's with the accent? It's freaking me out…'

'You, Miss –' Rin jabbed a finger towards his chest, 'have no right to go pickin' on anybody's accents just because you think yours is motherfuckin' perfect.'

'Wow, even your language got worse…' Len muttered privately.

'Wow…' Rin was peering into his face again, less than an inch from his nose. He cringed. 'You're real pretty, y'know. I really like your dress – it's damn cute.'

'Th-thanks…'

'N'awwh!' Rin glomped him. 'You look like a little doll!'

Things were getting very weird indeed.

Len realised he was wearing a frilled red bonnet. He had somehow changed into an airy strawberry-coloured smock. It was spread out on the cobblestone ground, flashing whatever was under it to the general public passing by. Len's face turned red. He hastily tucked his knees in.

Somehow it seemed, he'd also acquired a decent pair of white panties. The front section was printed with tiny pink octopi.

Rin crossed his arms, eyes glittering with good-natured enthusiasm. 'So. Where'd you come from, kid? Haven't seen you in the market before.'

'I… um, went through a series of very unfortunate events…'

'What? You got raped or somethin'?'

Len blinked. 'Uhh… no. Well – not yet, anyway.'

'Oh good. You scared me. I thought I was gonna have to deal with a knocked-up girl or somethin'.'

'…Indeed.'

'Come on then.' Rin propped him onto his feet. He actually had fairly lean biceps, a little tanned from years of rampaging outdoors, which Len found very disorienting. He himself on the other hand had acquired even more curves than he had had originally.

He almost fainted again.

Rin swatted the dust off his bum. 'How old are you?'

'Twelve.'

'Hey! I'm twelve too!' Rin grinned. 'We could be friends. Whadda you say?'

'Uh, yeah, sure.'

Rin whooped. 'Hell yeah, baby! I have a new girlfriend!'

'Haha…'

If only he knew.

'HEYY ANYONE!' Rin hollered into the street, waving his arm high in the air, 'Wanta buy strawberries from this cute hottie over here? Best strawberries in town, guaranteed!'

Len blushed delicately.

Although – why on earth was he selling strawberries here in the first place?

That, he didn't know.

'Oh, yeah… What's your name, by the way?'

'Len.'

'Damn! I used to have a sister called Len!' Rin whistled.

'Wh- what happened to her?'

'She died.'

'Oh.'

'Bah. Don't look so sad – I hardly even miss that bitch.'

'…Oh.'

However, Rin looked a little sad.

The afternoon sun was searing without the shade of trees. Len felt beads of sweat bubble up on the back of his neck and under his skirt. The sweltering street was so hot and uncomfortable that it made him begin to doubt if this world wasn't actually reality.

'Pff… Since when were panties so fucking uncomfortable?'

He stifled his urge to pinch them back into their correct place. He glanced at Rin, who was still cheerfully advertising his strawberries to passers-by, and wondered if this was what his sister had to endure everyday back in his real world.

No wonder she liked to stay out of them, despite his frantic pleas and traumas of going downstairs to the kitchen in the middle of the night to the sight of her without them, gulping down orange juice from the carton like she hadn't a care.

After a while, even the male version of Rin seemed to finally run out of enthusiasm and trotted back to the corner Len was sitting in, swinging the now two-thirds empty basket. He picked a choice strawberry and held it out to Len.

'Want some?'

'No thanks…' To be honest, he was sick of strawberries.

'Aww come on, I know you do.' Rin waved the fruit enticingly in front of his nose. 'Open up, girl.'

Len scowled, but consented for the sake of friendship. Rin pushed the strawberry into his mouth. He bit off the tip.

'There you go, your highness,' Rin laughed, dabbing the strawberry juice off Len's mouth like minding a princess, and then heartily chomped on the remainder of the fruit himself.

Len watched him glumly. The last time they had eaten like this must have been more than four years ago, before Rin started making fun of him and terrorising him and calling him a shota.

Maybe this version of his sister wasn't so bad after all, once he got used to it.

'Come on Len, let's go in the shade.'

'What the –!?'

Rin casually swept him off his feet, bridal-style, and looked around the street for a nice shady spot.

'Right…' he muttered.

If his sister back in his real world could do it, it was no surprise why this Rin couldn't.

'So… Where d'you wanna sit?'

'Put me down…'

'How 'bout there?' Rin pointed to a chestnut tree.

'Yeah, why not. Just put me down!' He frantically tried to plaster his upended skirt down. A lot of people (none too female) were gawking.

Rin set him down on a low brick wall, and Len retreated under his red bonnet in mortification, face just as red. He was feeling utterly like a girl.

'By the way, kid… That about you bein' my girlfriend just now – that was a joke, okay? I already have a girl.'

'Oh… okay.'

'Uh.' Rin looked uncomfortable. 'You're not… upset, are you? Sorry. I didn't mean it, really…'

Len laughed. 'Of course not.'

'We're just friends, okay? You can be my best friend – I'll help you sell your strawberries again, yeah?'

'Yup. Friends.' Len felt himself break into a grin naturally.

'What's her name, though? Your girl,' he asked.

'Her name's Olivia. Well y'know, she's not actually my girl, she's just this girl who always passes by the barn. She's like a real angel. A really hot one. I think she's a rich girl 'cause she's always wearin' these damn expensive-lookin' dresses and all but – don't get me wrong, she's really nice. We talked a few times, and, y'know… you wouldn't think she's a rich girl at all…'

'Oh, wow…' Fancy telling Oliver when he got back home. 'Like Romeo and Juliet, huh?'

'What?'

'Y'know – Olivia Hussey.'

'Who?'

'…Never mind.'

Rin looked at him again. 'Oh yeah, kid – by the way – d'you have a place to stay?'

'Uh, no.' He really had no idea where he was.

'Damn! That must be really hard… You can come over if you want. We have some spare floor.'

Len nodded. 'Yeah! Thanks.'

'Wait till Ma sees you,' Rin grinned. 'She's gonna be at you all damn evening.'

He paled. 'As in…?'

'Hah! Can't wait,' Rin cackled.

Len however was staring at Rin with a very peculiar expression now. '…You have a Ma?'

'The hell d'you mean?' Rin stared at him funny. 'Of course I do. I didn't just pop outta thin air, did I?'

'…Oh.'

###

Len was staring out into the late-afternoon street, squatting beside Rin, quite content, when he noticed a certain dangerous-looking figure standing in the shadows watching him. He started.

He watched warily as slowly, the man in the black cloak ghosted his way closer from across the square, stepping deliberately over the cobblestones. He was making a beeline towards the corner Len was sitting in. He drew out something long and silver from the folds of his garb.

He was carrying a knife.

Rin had noticed the man too, it seemed. His face had tensed. 'Kid – run.'

Len's eyes widened. 'But –'

'Eh… Hold your pants, I'll be fine.'

'Rin…'

'Just run!'

Just then, a posh horse-drawn carriage parked itself right in front of them. Two of the most hideous ladies in pouf dresses Len had ever seen stomped out, leaving the door wide open as they alighted to appraise a collection of lace fans on sale. Rin saw his chance and quickly shoved Len towards the open door. Len reluctantly clambered in, crouched, and waited, heart pounding. The ladies returned, and the carriage lurched forward.

They did not notice him until one of them stepped on him.

The young woman gave a little shriek.

'Who is that, Akane?' a grey-haired woman in a drab lilac dress asked.

'Oh – she's… um, the new maid.'

'Well, well… So you've finally found a worthy replacement.' The grey woman peered down her proud hawk nose at Len, round glasses icy. He shrank under her flinty stare. 'She had better be good this time.'

As the carriage lurched forward, Len desperately plastered his face against the window, trying to see if Rin was alright.

Ah – he was still there.

But the carriage soon turned a sharp bend, and both Rin and the cloaked man vanished out of his sight.

Sorry, I really mean no offence to Aoi and Akane fans. I don't hold any particular grudges against them – it's just the story that's this way. orz

Also, thanks Ashe Corinthos, I wasn't expecting that feedback so I was pretty thrilled! I really I hope you won't hate me for turning this into a Len/Kaito… :|

Thank you to KagamineGekokujou too (love your username btw), but please don't count on me, I personally don't often swear that much so I'm quite a novice on that side.

As to the King's pink rabbit plushie – please refer to Arsmagna's official YouTube channel for specification. (No, the king isn't necessarily Tatsuki btw, though that would be really cute.)

This chapter turned out a bit longer than planned, but please review and tell me what you think~ (Also if there's anything specific you want Len to wear... y'know. *hint, hint*) ;3