It was late in the evening when Draco headed to the library.
He was so exhausted and he needed the quite environment that it offered.
He dragged his legs into the far corner in the library, his escape place as he was ignoring the people around him.
They all were just nuisances, people he had to pretend to like when in fact he couldn't stand them.
He could count in one hand the number of people that mattered and it annoyed him.
They all wanted to be around him because of his look and popularity, they didn't really give a damn about the person behind it all. Although he figured that this person didn't have to offer much anyway. All that left of the person he once was is a bitter douchebag that care only about his ass and his life.
People may wonder what happened to make him like that, others will say that he is a snake and that this is only in his nature and he wasn't sure what version was the right one anymore. He couldn't remember the last time he could really be himself.
Or maybe he just didn't want to because deep down inside it was where he left his heart, in the past.
Draco laid his head on the table and tried to think about other things, less depressing one.
His hands were in his lap as his eyes starred at the book shelf on his right.
He noticed that it was dark in the corner he sat and that why he chose it in the first place.
How messed up his life became, one day everything was torn upside down and he couldn't prevent it. He was as miserable as it gets, even though he will never admit it.
His thoughts drifted to different places and he just let them do as they wish.
It was one afternoon in the fall, he couldn't remember the exact day but it was irrelevant.
He was on his way back home from school, he walked through the park and enjoyed the fresh air. The park was located north to the middle school he studied in, couple of blocks away and also the direct routine to his house.
He always was thankful that he could enjoy it twice a day because he liked the solitary atmosphere it provided him.
He was a loner since middle school and he never minded that fact, until he met her.
For the public he always had this happy and carefree appearance but in reality he was more troublesome then people believed. He was an A class actor, never saying too much or reviling too much. This is the person he was and he was cool with it.
Until he met the brushy haired girl that day in the park.
He knew she was in his class but he never paid too much attention to her, for him she was just another irrelevant person that wasn't worth his time.
People may see him arrogant and spoiled because of his name and parents.
By in reality he was the quiet and the loner type. He believed that he will only get hurt if he let people in. It wasn't that his parents didn't love him and was indifferent. It was because he knew that they never loved each other, they loved him like individuals and not like family.
But he never complaint about it because that was what he knew all his life.
She sat in one of the benches in the park and ate her lunch.
Draco at first thought just to pass by her and ignore her, but something about the way she sat there with her long wavy hair made him stop and talk to her.
He didn't know why he talked to her but when they engaged in the conversation he realized how natural it felt to be around her. The way her brown eyes lighted up near him, the way she smiled at him that made him to feel in home.
Also the way she said his name, like she really cared about him.
The warm sense of familiarly that she made him feel.
He didn't have to pretend near her, to push her away as a defense move to prevent her from coming too close.
She was already there…in his heart.
Draco felt someone shaking him up and he opened his eyes.
He didn't know what time it was but he suspected that he fall asleep because it was much darker. He lifted his head up and came face to face with Hermione.
He was forced to pinch himself in order to make sure he was awake.
The past couple of days she visited his dreams more them he cared to admit.
He wasn't sure but he thought it had something to do with her joining to the school his year that triggered his memories of them.
He was still sleepy but he could see her clearly, the same brown long hair and the warm eyes and smile. She always smiled at him and made his heart to flatter.
When she saw his confusion she said "You fall asleep, it past midnight, you should go to bed" she whispered a little embarrassed and looked at her hands.
He wanted to tell her he missed her and that he needed his best friend back but he couldn't.
She was too pure and innocent for him to corrupt her, she shouldn't face his demons because there is too many on them.
She deserves better, she deserves someone who will be there for her and will love her no matter what. She also deserves happiness, the thing he didn't know for 3 years.
He needs to stay away for her, her light doesn't meant for a dark person like him, bitter and unhappy person, selfish even.
He is an anchor that dragged everyone down while she is a safe shore.
He became dizzy from the fight that took place in his body, his heart wanted to hold in to her and never let go while him mind knew it was wrong.
"I didn't asked for you help, please don't bother me next time, my business is none of your concern "He tried to sound as angry as he could manage.
He wanted to thank her, to smile at her and to ask how she was doing all those years but he couldn't. She had a lot to deal with without him and he lost the privilege to be around her the moment he let her go years ago.
Hermione was hurt, he could see it in her face.
"You could just nod for a thank you, you know. But instead you chose to be this heartless bastard. Well guess what? Not all the world revolves around you and I just tried to be nice to you for the sake of our past friendship, but I guess I shouldn't have" tears formed in her eyes and although she tried to look indifferent her eyes gave it all.
He broke her heart, the look in her eyes conformed it.
He was so angry at her, at himself and at his messed up life that made it like that.
He clenched his finger tightly while he was trying to clam himself down, to show her that she didn't affect him at all and he didn't care about her words.
But the truth was that her words were like knifes to him and he needed to get away before they will cut him to pieces right there in front of her.
He swallowed hard and stood up and left her there.
It was the last time she tried to speak to him..