Sadie spent the next day or so trying to discern whether Sirius' behavior was friendly or flirting. When the Marauders were around he acted like his normal self, but when they would run into each other in the library or common room with no one else he would go out of his way to be nice to her.
"This is terrible!" she moaned to Lily one day in the bathroom. They had ducked inside between classes when they spotted the handsome foursome headed in their direction down the corridor. "I can't be worrying about something like this. I have classes to focus on."
"Then don't worry about it," Lily said simply, checking her reflection in the mirror.
"That's easy for you to say. You've had years of practice," Sadie responded bitterly. She took to examining her own reflection in the next mirror. Her dark curls were perfect as ever and her complexion had thankfully cleared near the end of the previous year. She didn't find it impossible that boys were suddenly taking an interest in her, but it was quite inconvenient. "That last thing I need is to have a lovesick puppy shadowing my every footstep," she added, pinning her bangs to the side. "I just got out of a relationship, the last thing I want is to jump into another one."
"Alright, I'm sure they've gone by now. Where would you like to spend our free period?" Lily asked, sweeping past the subject.
"I was going to go sit out by the lake and work on the Herbology report we have due next week. I think I have most of my argument worked out, but it's difficult trying to make a case as to the most beneficial use of tentacula leaves," Sadie explained as they picked up their bags and made their way for the door. Sadie pushed her weight against the wood and opened it slowly, but accidentally hit someone in the process.
"Oh I'm so sorry!" she exclaimed, helping them pick up their belongings which had scattered across the floor.
"It's fine, Sadie. How many times have I made a mess of your things?" Remus pointed out with a chuckle. Sadie looked up at him silently.
"Where are you off to Remus?" Lily asked, attempting to smooth over Sadie's silence.
"Oh, the library. This tentacula essay isn't going to write itself, you know," he explained. "What about you?"
"I haven't decided. Sadie's going out by the lake, but I'd end up getting distracted so I think I'll just take over a corner in the common room," Lily explained. Remus grinned.
"Right, well I'd better get going," he said quickly, and left in the direction of the library.
"So you still haven't talked to him?" Lily asked, repositioning her bag's strap on her shoulder.
"It's not that I haven't talked to him…I'm just not sure what to say anymore," Sadie admitted sadly.
The truth was she missed Remus. He had been her best guy friend at Hogwarts, quite possibly her best friend out of anyone. They always worked on their essays together, would help each other with problems, and possibly most importantly, gave each other advice on dating matters. That was more of Remus giving her advice, because when she actually thought about it, Remus never dated anyone. He always talked about this girl he really liked, perhaps even loved, but he never told her who it was or what she looked like.
Sadie stopped by the kitchens on her way out and took a flask of pumpkin juice and an apple. Once outside she found her favorite beech tree and took out her essay, reading over what she had already written. Every now and then she would scratch out a word or sentence to be rewritten.
Remus sighed, staring out a window that overlooked the lake, knowing Sadie was sitting on its shoreline and wishing he had the nerve to go down and confess everything. But instead, he pulled the piece of parchment in front of him closer and held his quill hesitantly, trying to think of what to write next.
"'For thy sweet love remember'd such wealth brings, That then I scorn to change my state with kings'? What is this?" Sirius asked, reading over Remus' shoulder. Remus quickly folded the parchment and put it away.
"It's none of your business," Remus said quickly, packing up his things.
"Don't tell me you wrote that rubbish," Sirius said with a laugh.
"Of course not, it's Shakespeare," Remus answered.
"Ah, so you're sending that to a lady? 'Bout time," Sirius said, punching his shoulder. Remus rolled his eyes and swung his bag over his shoulder, leaving Sirius alone in the library. Sirius glanced out the window and saw a rather large group of girls were walking along the lake and immediately ran his fingers through his dark hair and straightened his robes. As he sauntered through the doorway he began to devise an excuse for going down to the lake.
Sadie sat under her tree, glaring silently at the group of twittering fourth years girls who could talk of nothing else but the Marauders. She sighed and attempted to go back to her work, but an owl landed suddenly beside her. She started slightly but noticed it was holding out its leg with a letter addressed to her. She untied it gingerly and stroked it's feathers.
"I'm sorry, I haven't got anything for you," she insisted when it stared up at her expectantly. It clicked its beak unhappily and flew off. Sadie opened the letter and gasped.
Dearest Sadie,
'When in disgrace with fortune and men's eyes,
I all alone beweep my outcast state,
And trouble deaf Heaven with my bootless cries,
And look upon myself, and curse my fate,
Wishing me like to one more rich in hope,
Featur'd like him, like him with friends possess'd,
Desiring this man's art, and that man's scope,
With what I most enjoy contented least.
Yet in these thoughts myself almost despising,
Haply I think on thee, - and then my state,
Like to the lark at break of day arising
From sullen earth sings hymns at heaven's gate,
For thy sweet love remember'd such wealth brings
That then I scorn to change my state with kings.'
You are more beautiful than the sunset and more loving than anyone I've ever known. I want nothing more than to tell you who I am but I can't bring myself to that just yet. But I need you to know how amazing I think you are, and how incredibly perfect you are for me. Just know that somewhere out there someone is completely in love with you right under your nose. Wait for me.
With much adoration,
You're secret admirer
Sadie sat in shocked silence. She had never received a letter anything like that, let alone from a secret admirer. She quickly gathered her things.
"Well, hello there fair maiden," Sirius called out, making his way for her tree. Sadie rolled her eyes.
"Hello Sirius. I'm really sorry but I have to be somewhere," she said shortly.
"You're so quick to shrug off a potential suitor," he said teasingly, leaning up against the tree trunk and crossing his arms.
"Oh please, Sirius, you wouldn't know the first thing about courting me," she laughed. She flashed him a quick smile in farewell and turned her back on him to make for the castle.
"'For thy sweet love remember'd such wealth brings, That then I scorn to change my state with kings,'" he recited, making her stop in her tracks. "I've heard the ladies like Shakespeare," he added. Sadie turned around slowly. Her mind was buzzing as she put two and two together.
"Sirius…how did you know?" she asked awestruck.
"Well, you know. He was the ultimate romantic, even if he was a muggle," he said with his usual cockiness.
"That's my favorite sonnet. Did you write me this letter?" she asked, holding it up between them.
"Er…yes! Yes, that was me," he said, glancing at it.
"Thank you," she said quietly, suddenly shy.
"Sadie, would you like to have dinner with me this weekend in Hogsmeade?" he asked, taking a step closer to her. She looked up at him for a moment before nodding her head.
"Sure. I'll see you around, then," she said, heading for the castle and glancing back at him with a grin. Sirius smirked in triumph.
"That'll teach them, telling me Sadie would never agree to a date," he said, strutting down the beach toward the fourth years.
Sadie went straight up to Gryffindor Tower and sat with Lily, slamming the letter on the table over her friend's essay. Lily gave her a disapproving look before taking up the letter and reading it through. When she got to the end her eyes widened and she looked up at Sadie.
"Who is it from?" she asked instantly.
"If they wanted me to know for sure they would have signed it, don't you think?" Sadie asked, taking it back and looking over the handwriting again.
"Well do you have any ideas?" Lily asked, as Remus entered quietly outside their notice. She smiled when he saw the letter in Sadie's hands.
"I mean…well Sirius just appeared after I got the letter, and then recited the last two lines of the sonnet. And then when I asked him about it, he said he wrote it…" Sadie said slowly. Lily gave her a disbelieving look.
"I highly doubt Sirius could write something like that," Lily said skeptically.
"I did too. But it was too much of a coincidence for me to ignore it. Anyway, I guess I'll find out this weekend," she said, putting the letter in her bag.
"Don't tell me you're going to go on a date with him," Lily said with a sigh.
"Well, it's one date. It's not like I'm agreeing to marry him. And you never know, he could surprise me. I'm trying to give him the benefit of the doubt here," Sadie said, picking up her bag and going up to get her books for her next class from her room.
Remus stared after her and felt as though someone had punched him in the stomach.