Two days later Castle brought Chinese home for supper. "Sorry, guys, after today's session I don't think I could lift a pan to make dinner so I just stopped on the way home. I'm serious, Bart had me lifting weights today and my arms are now useless appendages just hanging from my shoulders."

"Are you sure you're not overdoing it Dad?" Alexis asked. "It's not like you ever exercised regularly before." She reached up and started to knead his shoulders. Castle winced and shied away from her touch.

"I have to admit every muscle in my body aches, but it will all be worth it when I look as good as Bart." Castle replied. Bart was his trainer. He really enjoyed working with Bart. He was funny but also was good at motivating. Castle was glad he started exercising. It gave him a purpose and he thoroughly enjoyed getting to know some of the other gym rats. He actually was sleeping a little better and had cut back some on the drinking.

Shortly after dinner, Martha stood up and said, "Well, I'm meeting a friend for drinks so I'll see you both later."

Beckett was curled up on her sofa, reading a book. She'd been on the same page for about a half hour as her thoughts kept turning to Castle. She wished she could figure out a way to get things back to normal. She just kept thinking about how he used to look at her and tease her and just always be there for her.

They had wrapped up the case at work and she was under no pressure. Tomorrow was Friday and she wasn't on call over the weekend. It felt good to have some stress free time to herself.

There was a soft knock at her door. She wasn't sure at first if it really was a knock. She sighed and as she headed to the door she heard another soft knock.

"Martha!" she exclaimed in surprise as she opened the door. "Is there something wrong?"

"I'm afraid there might be," Martha answered. She didn't know if this was the right thing to do, but she was desperate. She had always liked Kate, but she felt that Kate was hurting her son so it was difficult to come to talk to her.

"Come in," Kate said swinging open the door wider. "You can have a seat over there." She pointed to a comfortable chair by the couch. She thought Martha looked a tad pale. "Could I get you some tea or something?"

Martha shot her a look. "Do you have anything stronger?"

Beckett smiled, "I have wine. Would that be OK?" Martha nodded.

Kate brought the wine bottle and 2 glasses back to the couch. Whatever this conversation was about, she didn't think one glassful would be enough.

As Kate handed Martha her glass of wine she asked, "So what is going on?"

Martha took a drink of her wine before she began. "I'm afraid Richard is going to commit suicide."

Beckett almost dropped her glass. "No, I can't believe he would do that!" she protested. Even as she said that her mind was racing. The old Castle she knew would never commit suicide, but the Castle that was most recently at the precinct was a mystery to her. She immediately remembered the last time she saw him. He had that horrible sad, dejected look on his face and she remembered how she felt when he said goodbye with such finality. Doubts started creeping in. "Why do you think that?"

"Because he wrote about it. He wrote about how he'd lost everything important to him. He described it in detail. He wasn't writing about a generic suicide. He used his own name and our names. He never uses real people's names when he's writing fiction. Kate, he even mentioned the date."

Beckett's stomach was in knots. Her heart was pounding. She felt like she was being smothered with a pillow it was so hard to breathe. "When is it?"

"Saturday afternoon. Alexis and I are going to the theater. He has it all planned out." Martha's voice was getting shaky and she paused pressing her lips together trying to keep the tears from spilling out. "He doesn't want us to find his body so he is going to call 911 before he does it."

"Did you ask him about it?" Beckett couldn't imagine having that conversation with her son.

"Of course," Martha replied. "He said he was just writing a story and that he had no intention to go through with it. He was very convincing, but I'm still worried. I mean if he really meant to do it would he admit it to me?"

She took another drink then continued, "You know I was never much of a mother. I thought when you had a child you got a nanny and that was all there was to it. One thing Richard always kept from me was how he was doing. When he was in 7th grade he was bullied a lot. One day he came home with a torn shirt and I yelled at him. I found out much later he had been beaten up. He never let on. I guess he was beat up a lot. At the end of the school year, one of his teachers told me how wonderful it was that I was so supportive of my son. Richard had told him that I was always there for him and I had given him really good advice. The teacher said it was so clever of me to come up with some of schemes that Richard used to outwit the bullies. I don't know if Richard was just covering for me or creating a mother that he wished he had. After that I really tried to be there for him, but he still kept all the bad stuff from me. I guess that's why I'm so unsure now."

Both women seemed to be lost in their own thoughts for a while as they sipped on the wine. Martha finally looked at Beckett. "You know he loves you, Kate. He loves you but you don't even acknowledge it. You don't return his love and you don't tell him you're not interested. You just keep him in limbo, twisting in the wind. Richard is an open book to anyone that he cares about, but he's been walking on egg shells around you afraid if he's honest he'll scare you away or upset you." There was a single tear sneaking down Kate's cheek. "Kate, if he dies on Saturday, is there anything that you have left unsaid?"