What Am I Doing?- A Vampire Knight Fanfiction.

YAY! I'm so glad to be updating! Oh how I wish I had the internet at home... Well enjoy this chappie which is longer than normal :DDD Oh and by the way: I just realized (too late) that Yuki and Zero sleep where ever the headmaster sleeps! Is that with the Day Class? It doesn't matter though because it'll be taxing to worry about the headmaster popping in and out wondering why Kaname is there or where those moaning sounds are coming from. Whereas if they were with the Day Class only it wouldn't matter, because Kaname is awesome and can go undetected and as for the moaning... well it's a dorm, sex is everywhere. i just wanted to tell everyone that Zero is in the Day Class dorms... although that MIGHT change- big might.

Disclaimer: I don't own VK or anything legally affiliated with it.

Warnings: Some yaoi; in this chapter, I think I'll start the ShikixIchijo thing off lightly. Although that shouldn't be a warning, but a reward!

Chapter 4- Those Silly Inner Mechanisms

Kaname+

Nothing could make this night any better. And nothing could ruin my mood, either. Zero unknowingly made sure of that. I mean, I hadn't gotten much sleep that day I pleased Zero and confessed my love for him, but I was still as content as ever. He hadn't told anyone, not even Yuki, it seems; he even came out to escort us to class. And that's where I became internally mirth-filled. It was over something minute, yes, but it was so cute, I couldn't help it.

Zero had blushed and waved to me.

When the Night Class and I strolled by the fangirls, I glanced to Zero, unashamedly, and he was already looking at me. I slowed my walk and wanted to go snuggle up to him, but I couldn't for obvious reasons. To my surprise he only shifted awkwardly and I saw the blush stain his pale skin. As if that wasn't good enough, he fluttered a few fingers at me, then quickly turned away. Then I stopped completely. Zero blushed? I could understand when he reddened from me all over him the other day, but from the sight of me, he blushed? I smiled to myself and reluctantly left him there while I thought, 'And here I thought it might just be a passing feeling.'

From my seat in class, I tried to pay attention, but I couldn't concentrate. The image of Zero's 'high-school-crush' look was etched in my mind- almost viciously adorable. I was used to doing whatever I wanted, but I couldn't just leave during class and interrupt Zero's sleep in his room... if he was asleep, to be with him. I wanted to leave and go to him again. Perhaps not for more contact (although I wouldn't mind that either) but to get inside of his mind. It seemed very interesting to me. Anyone who caught the look Zero had and the shy wave he tossed my way smally would feel the same. Zero Kiryu never really smiled, let alone had nice enough intentions to do that. I wished to talk to him and learn about him. Not his past or life, because I knew about all of that. I meant his passions and thoughts- his inner mechanisms that figured 'Hey there's a vampire who came in and molested me, I'm going to wave.' I mean what makes the ash-haired boy tick...

I felt a slight frown cross my lips. In the back of my mind, I wondered why this was occuring. Why am I so infatuated with him all of a sudden? Two days ago, I would hardly worry about Zero glaring at me or what he was thinking but now he's invading my daydreams and I'm finding it hard not to imagine myself caressing his smooth skin and hearing his voice dripping with lust; moaning my name while I sunk my fangs into his neck...

I swallowed anxiously. What was I doing? I sighed hopelessly and turned my head to stare out the window into the darkness. I supposed this is what happened when you get shot in the ass by Cupid. Painful affinity.

After class and me discussing things with my classmates, I was waiting for us to be allowed to go to our dorms when Headmaster Cross stepped in, which surprised us all. The whole Night Class was crammed into the lobby of the school building when he came and got our attention. I stood in the front of them all, something that seemed to happen automatically due to my pureblood stats.

Cross just stood there smiling at us and I opened my mouth to greet him when suddenly a wave of presence shot through me... and all of the other vampires as well. They gasped and even the inattentive ones looked to the front. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end causing my whole body to be alert. This aura... it belonged to someone who I believed to be dead long ago. I took a step towards Cross because the vampire bearing this feeling was behind him. As soon as I did that Cross smiled wider and said, loud enough to carry through the room, "Attention Night Class! We have a new student! He is a bit younger than you all, but I expect you all to be as kind as possible. Anyways, he is a pureblood as I'm sure you can feel by his presence: Nezumi Kuran! 3"

My eyes widened as he stepped aside and revealed him. My little brother.

"Hello... Oh, Kaname! Aren't you glad to see me? "

Ichijo+

"I'm telling you, Shiki... there's something about this kid... Nezumi-kun."

My frown deepened when I felt his arms snake around my waist and pull me against him. Sighing he murmurred into my neck, "Maybe, but if he says he's a Kuran, then he must have his reasons. No one in their right mind would joke about that. Anyway Kaname seemed fine with him before we came back to our dorms... Forget about it and come on."

"Maybe... ...ow."

Shiki nibbled on my ear. He always did this when I was worried... and with good reason. I stopped wondering about Nezumi Kuran, who was in his assigned dorm like everyone else, and reached up to lace my fingers in Shiki's dark hair. He moved his mouth to my neck and nipped there making my stomach flutter with anticipation. I tightened my grip on his hair and he moaned quietly saying, "Ichijo... let's go to the bed."

"Fine, but don't get anything on it this time."

I watched Shiki, almost nervous and I'm not sure why- we've done this before. I think it might be the edge to his very aura. It made me shiver with pleasure; he emitted such a spine-tingling presence which is what made me lose it the first time anyway. His piercing eyes glanced up to me from his position on the floor and he had the smallest of smirks.

"You still quiver?"

I pouted and huffed, "I can't help it!"

He laughed a bit before coming closer on his knees to me. I was sitting on the edge of my bed, leaning back on my hands. Using his, he swiftly spread my legs apart, causing me to squeak slightly and him to whisper sensually, "Oh, Ichijo... you make the cutest sounds before I even get started." I blushed a little and continued to survey him removing my belt and other obnoxious clothing. He sat back to look at me. ...I hate it when he takes in my appearance, and he more than knows it!

"Shikiii! Don't stare at me."

He furrowed his brow and leaned up to kiss me murmurring against my lips, "Why? You're so pretty to look at. The first time I saw you I thought you were a girl..." he kissed me again and said, "Then I figured, 'Well no girl is as lovely as that.'"

"Shiki..."

Gosh, he is so... sweet. And he always knows just what to say...

"Then again," his lips twisted into a sly smirk and his eyes fell to look inbetween my legs and he finished, "no girl has one of those either."

I felt myself redden again and I whined, "You're embarrassing me!"

Suddenly he closed his eyes slowly and moaned. Huh? He's never done that before- randomly moan, I mean. He edged closer and nuzzled the inside of my thigh with his face and said, "God, your voice kills me... Every time you speak, I get so... "

"Shiki?" He gets like this when I talk to him? Ooh, neat!

"Oh... say my name again..." He licked my thigh, closer to my genitals and I shuddered whispering, "Shiki... you're weird."

He let out a dark laugh and continued his ministrations, eventually making me forget about Nezumi Kuran for the time being.

((Sorry. I didn't wanna exhaust my sex section vocab, so... use your imagination DX))

Zero+ (this is happening while Kaname's in class up to the end of Kaname's part)

Why? Why, why, why, WHY did I go escort the Night Class tonight? I knew HE would be there. I had told myself that our encounter the other day wasn't anything big, but as soon as I saw him again, I turned red and waved like a little school girl. What the hell was that for? Could I not control myself anymore, I mean, jeez, blushing?! And I knew he was looking at me when I did it, so I'm sure he'll put that into his memory bank. I was glad Headmaster Cross let Yuki and I have the night off for some announcement he had to make to the Night Class, so I didn't have to see Kaname again that night. That was the last thing I wanted right now- who knows what I'd do next time. Maybe giggle and bat my eyelashes at him. --;

Then again... when he came in the other day, it seemed so... -for lack of a better word- right. Like it was fine if he did that to me. I didn't kill him like I thought I would... Then to make it even more odd he said that he loved me. Love? I hated him- how could he love me after all I've done? As weird as that was, I told him that I thought that I loved him too. ((It wasn't clear when he said it- I'm sorry)).

Thinking back to my last words, I'm confused. Perhaps I was caught up in the moment, but at the time it sure felt like he was my love. Or lover anyway. Well... let it be known that I'm not sure if I hate Kaname so much anymore- THAT I am sure of. Ugh... being confused is so hard.

Sighing again for the millionth time that night, I trudged towards my room. I was so close to my haven when I heard, "Zeeeerooo!"

Jesus...

"Hm... Yuki?"

I turned away from my door and looked down to her bright little face with a rather blank expression on my own.

"Zero, can you tutor me? Remember we have a test tomorrow..."

At first I just wanted to chew her out for being so dumb, because I was already pissed at myself for being such an idiot, but then I figured Yuki's stupidity could take my mind off of it. It has been good for a laugh or two in the past.

"Ok, let's go."

"Let's go in your room, since we're already here."

"...okay..."

Patience is not a strong point of mine and it became very obvious in there that night.

"Zero I don't get it! Where's the equal sign?"

"Dammit, Yuki! These aren't even freakin' math equations, these are just vocabulary comprehension questions! What word goes in the blank!?"

"Uh... um..."

"Ah! Forget it."

I stomped away from her and my desk she was seated in front of and made for the door. I looked over my shoulder and said angrily, "Don't ask me to tutor you again until you at least have an iota of what the hell you're doing!"

Her pitiful expression did nothing for me and as I slammed my dorm room's door I wondered why I was snapping at her lately. She's always been a bit stupid and it never really bothered me until now. In fact, I used to love that idiot. At least I thought it was love because ever since the other day I can't stand her dumb tail. That's more hostiliy than a normal lover's spat, I believe. So... maybe I don't love her.

"But Kaname... If only I could answer the question: 'Would I let him do that again?' then I may be one step closer to finding out if I love him or lust him or whatever."

I mused to myself in the empty lounge of the Day Class dorm with a Dr.Pepper bottle raised so I could look through the deep brown liquid, dreamily. At least Yuki hadn't followed me; I really needed time alone to sort myself out. Actually, what I needed to do was talk to Kaname, but I doubt I could do it without breaking down. I needed to ask him why he came in my room and basically molested me. Why he said he loved me.

My face scrunched up and I re-worded that: Why did I say that I loved him??? That night he pleasured me after I showed an inkling of affection for him. But, it wasn't like it was blind lust. It seemed like he did really want to help me relax. As if it wasn't sex, but rather making love. I felt a coy smile come to my face. I liked the sound of that...

Suddenly, a figure seemed to form in the bubbles of the soda I had up to my eye level. It looked like a male; he was younger than I, but the point is- I'm seeing people in my sodas...

"Hello there."

I slammed the bottle down on the table I was seated at in alarm and saw that a person was in fact standing in front of me. I raised an eyebrow and took in his appearance. He had shoulder length brown hair that hung in front of his eyes. And his eyes- they were a brilliant tint of green as they observed me as well. The next thing that struck me was the overpowering sense about me when he smiled with his sharp, dangerous-looking fangs. This kid was a pureblood vampire! What the crap? Headmaster Cross didn't tell me or Yuki about a new pureblood to escort and pamper.

"Hey, vampire, what are you doing here? I haven't heard about you..."

I tried out one of my glares on him since I seem to be having problems glaring at Kaname as of late. He just smirked and said, "You haven't? Well... I know ALL about you, Zero Kiryu. Before I go on, I am Nezumi Kuran, Kaname Kuran's little brother."

I didn't really take notice of the 'Kaname's little brother' bit right then. Instead, I stood up and took a challenging step towards Nezumi and reached a hand into my jacket, grasping the Bloody Rose, but not pulling it out just yet.

"Aw, but I haven't finished my dramatic introduction yet."

I blinked and when I did, Nezumi was gone. At that moment I felt breath on my neck and a warm tongue twirl around under my ear.

"Hm. I wonder how your blood tastes..."

I snarled and spun away. Nezumi was standing behind me, smirking again. This kid was a freak. I yanked out the gun and aimed for his head fearlessly.

"Don't fucking mess with me, vampire. I don't care if you are a Kuran. I'll blow you away..."

He laughed quite loud and said, "Right, right. Zero Kiryu of the thinning Kiryu vampire hunters. Your parents have long since died and your brother, Ichiru-san, doesn't really have anything to do with the Kiryus anymore, does he? Ah, yes, that reminds me why I'm here, wasting my precious sleep with you. I don't appreciate you fornicating with my big brother. Stop it- don't ever do it again."

My strong expression melted into an utterly confused look.

"What?"

"You heard me. I love my brother much more than you ever will and I know that all he thinks about is you, even when I arrived. He thought I was dead, I come here full of affection for him, and his thoughts are still pulled to you. Ha... sure, he spoke with me excitedly and I told him about how I managed to live through that accidental attack placed on us, but I can read minds. ...He only thought of you. It irks me ever so..."

"Um... so let me get this straight. You know about what happened between us and now you're jealous?"

"Jealous? No, what's there to be jealous of? A washed up hunter? Hm. Not even that. You are just a horny little slut after my big brother!"

I sneered at him and hissed, "What kind of insult is that? You may look a like a sixteen or seventeen year old, but you act like a five year old."

I inhaled to yell at this brat some more, but the wind was knocked out of me when I found myself pinned under his lithe body. He was fast.

"What, you'd rather have me physically harm you? I'm warning you: stay away from my brother. He is mine."

His power felt like it was crushing me from the inside out. His green orbs burned into my silver ones and I almost lost my angry composure to fear. This one was scary in a way. Even now, his nails seemed to grow into sharpened claws as they dug into my arms harshly while I lay, flattened by him, on my back.

All for Kaname? I couldn't just... stay away from him after all of this. First of all, I'm finding myself wanting him more and more every hour. Second of all, I still want to ask him personally about what the crap's going on- about the sexual encounter and now about his psycho kin. Third... if I stay away, it'll feel like I'm listening to the insulting little brat with a incestual obsession with his brother, which is out of the question.

I struggled a bit to jerk the chain on my gun, making it jump back to my hand- I had dropped it when Nezumi pinned me. I quickly pressed it to Nezumi's stomach and smirked as his face twitched in annoyance. Ok... he knows he's been backed into a vulnerable postion. I wanted to badly pull the trigger when he suddenly jumped back onto his feet about three feet away from me. I sat up and watched him carefully as he folded his arms across his chest, making me look like a lowly peasant to his greatness. Sickening...

" Pfff. Whatever. Kiryu, I don't like you... and if I find that you are still getting involved romantically with my big brother... I won't kill you, but I'll torture you avidly,"

He strode towards me smoothly and I did not move at all, keeping the stern look on my face while he whispered into my ear, "and maybe bend Kaname to my will to help out his little brother with that task of harming you."

My eyes grew a bit with that last part. The very notion of Kaname hurting me brought a feeling of dread for some reason. Okay, so maybe I do like Kaname a bit more than I previously thought. And I tried not to be selfish or vain when I thought, "If Kaname really does love me, then harming me would hurt him, too, right? I don't want that..."

A loud snarl ripped through the silence and Nezumi growled, backing away, "No! It wouldn't hurt him at all because he DOESN'T love you! The only reason he did that to you is because you made him!"

Ah, that's right. He can read minds.

"Kuran, I don't think this'll work out like you plan... Kaname isn't stupid."

"Don't call him 'Kaname' like you know him! And don't think you know everything. This really has nothing to do with you. It's me and my big brother. I'm just warning you that if you don't leave us be, you'll get hurt, got it?"

I got to my feet only to find that Nezumi had disappeared. He must've left after I got him all pissed off. Also, judging by his temper tantrum, he was bluffing, so he had to get out of here before I got to him... I think.

Well, I was about to find out, because I turned around to return to my room, feeling exhausted from thinking and thinking and fighting... and thinking, when there at the door by the stairway, I saw Kaname walk in.

Author's Notes: Yaaaaay! I luff Dr.Pepper! Weeeell... another chappie down! It was reeeally confusing to type and organize (especially with the time of day and the job of escorting the classes around )- I hope it's good. Please review. Gently, please. ::whimper:: Oh, and if you caught something incorrect with the way I had the time of day and whatnot please tell me and I'll try to fix it.

ShikixIchijo was sorta a bonus thing because I don't really think it held an important part o the plot. What else... Oh yeah!! How'dya like Nezu-kun! I like his weird personality. I'm still kinda switching around with whiney or cool and collected, but the 'big brother' complex thing is staying. I'm not one for the incest thing, but when I read the part in VK with Ichiru and Zero for the first time, VK went right with Ouran High School Host Club's incest-like thing. Those two are ok to have light incest, 'cause it's cute. Speaking of... I might bring Ichiru in to be jealous about his brother as well. (Also, because I love Ichiru. Kawaiiii!)

Anyways, Kaname came in! What will Zero do? Obey Nezumi to avoid hurting himself and maybe Kaname? Or ignore it?! And what about Kaname? Does he really love Zero or what?! And what the hell's going on with his feelings for his crazy brother? Does Kaname know what Nezumi's doing to poor Zero? Stay tuned and find out:DDDDDDDDDDD ::more extra smiles::

ALSO... Thank you Zaiaku Dyuu, wierdchick, AoiYume-sama, caijun-beauty, Finland's Faerie, Good Evening, CrypticSweeet, and Regal Moon for the reviews ::sob::