Saudade
Disclaimer : Tadatoshi Fujimaki
Pairing : Hidden
Genre : Fluff, Angst, Romance, Mature, Lemon, Tragedy, Twisted.
Warning : I'm not good at tragedy, and this is fast-paced plot.
Rating : R18+ . !Continue at your own risk .!
By : Hikari Rin .
Read at Fanfiction . net Application in GooglePlay for a better view.
Notes : 'Warning = This chapter contains a longer story.' I'm sorry for a short hiatus because there's so much problems here and there, also, my country doesn't support so i need a long way to do to post a story. Thanks for you guys who keep supporting me and waiting J I hope this chapter won't be a disappointment.
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CHAPTER 4
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Kise always watching Kuroko's movement, from eating, sitting, talking, and the way his eyes always closed when he's laughing.
'He's losing himself, isn't he', Kise thought.
"Ne, Kurokocchi~ Now all of the things are done, let's go up to our room-ssu! You should rest in a comfy place so you can relax!", Kise chirps out happily after he done finishing his glass of wine.
"What do you mean by 'our room'? We're not separating?", Kuroko tilts his head in confusion.
"If you're uncomfortable in one bed with me, i can sleep on the couch and i'll be fine, Kurokocchi~", Kise smiles and he—of course—doesn't want to force his will to Kuroko. He wants Kuroko to finally calm and let this all slowly slide.
"Ah... Thank you, Kise-kun..", Kuroko lowering his head.
"Jaa, let's go-ssu!", Kise stands up and offering his hand to Kuroko—which Kuroko take gladly and they go up to their room while holding hands like they used to do in Junior High School.
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"Whoa.. Kise-kun.. It's really... Amazing..", Kuroko walks into the suite room and wandering around in awe—amazed about how beautiful the room is.
This must be really expensive, Kuroko thought and made a mental note that he'll say thanks to Kise much more later.
Kise takes off his tuxedo and hang it on the door as he loosen up his tie, throwing his body to the couch. Well, the couch is almost as comfortable as the bed, so sleeping on it will feels like the same.
Kuroko rubs the bed and then sitting on it—still captivated about how can there's a bed with a blanket that almost as soft as a feather. He want to spend the week on the bedroom and just reading, sleeping, snuggly—if only the price is not 'that' high.
"Oyasuminasai, Kurokocchi~", Kise smiles and then lays his head down on the chouch.
"Wait—Kise-kun!", Kuroko shouts and then walk towards Kise, and then he tugs Kise's shirt lightly.
"What is it, Kurokocchi?", Kise immediately sit down and taken aback by Kuroko's sudden loud voice. It's really rare to hear it.
"A-ano.. L-Let's sleep on the bed togehter... I mean, y-you paid it for us and it's too spacy for me alone..", Kuroko flustered a little bit as he twiddles with his thumb while looking down at the floor.
Kise widens his eyes and then smiles as he touch Kuroko's face, "You still need a warmth, aren't you?", he chuckles and then caress Kuroko's cheek—adoring how strong Kuroko has been for all these years and months despite how fragile-looking he is.
Now they decided to climb to the bed and then sigh in relief because their position just got so completely right and comfortable for them. Finally and slowly, both of them closing their eyes and dive into their Dream Land.
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A sobbing sound can be heard faintly.
Sob.
Sniff.
Sob.
Sob.
Sniff.
Kise suddenly wakes up. He took a glance to the clock. '2.45 in the morning. Who's crying? Is it a ghost? Female ghost? No no no, it's a male high ptiched voice'
He felt someone grabbing his shirt and trembling. So he looks to his side and found the source of the voices.
"K-Kurokocchi..?"
Kuroko shivering, trembling, and.. crying. He started to mumbles incoherent words but then slowly his words become a little bit clearer that Kise can hear it faintly.
"N-No... D-Don't.."
"Don't... leave.. please.."
"Mom... mom.. why.. blood.."
"Don't.. go.. mom.. alone.."
"Fa..ther.. stop... please.."
Kise widens his eyes and then he frowns.
Is it..? Wait.. i can't think negatively.. But.. It might be it..
Kise' eyes are tearing up and all he can see is a fragile and broken little boy, suffering from his nightmare that lurking inside his mind and creeping in his life. He wraps his arms around Kuroko tiny figure and hug him tightly and closely, like he's afraid that Kuroko might disappear into dust if he didn't do it. Gently, he pats Kuroko's back and singing lullabies to soothe the other.
Kuroko still gripping onto Kise's shirt tightly that his knuckles turns white, but slowly, his cries drifted off and he slowly falling asleep again.
After checking up Kuroko's condition, Kise kiss Kuroko's forehead with love and affection then continue his sleep.
I must protect him.
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The morning finally come, the bird chirping and the sun shine brightly. The window has already been opened and the morning breeze gently caressing Kuroko's cheek.
With that bright condition, Kuroko slowly opening his eyes and then he yawns. He sit on the bed and looking out to the window.
"Kurokocchi!"
Kise's loud voice suddenly barging into the bedroom and making Kuroko flinched in surprise.
"I've made a breakfast for us-ssu! Come on~! Hurry up!", Kise pulls Kuroko by his hand and walks to the dining room. Such a five star hotel, huh?
Kuroko sits down on the chair and he looks at the food that being served infront of his face. "Kise-kun... Are these all made by you?"
Kise smiles widely and grins childishly, "Yeah! I've brought us some ingridients before you wok up and cook it all-ssu! I hope you like it~", Kise looks away as he swirls his forefinger nervously infront of his chest.
Kuroko chuckles softly and then spoon himself the curry with rice.
"Kise-kun...", Kise perked up and looks at Kuroko worriedly
"It's delicious.."
With that, Kise screams happily and making such a noise in the early morning.
"Ne, ne, ne, Kurokocchi~!", Kise grins and place his chin on his palm as he smiles brightly towards Kuroko, "Let's go out and refresh ourselves-ssu~!"
Kuroko silents for a while and then he nods. Maybe he really needs more air to calm his anxiety mind. Well... Kise's hughs last night was really great, but it's not that easy to calm him.
"Okay~! A date with Kurokocchi! You finish that breakfast and then prepare yourself, okay-ssu~? Hehehhe~", Kise's puppy's ears are popping out and it's twitching happily.
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TOKYO NATIONAL THEME PARK
It's the place that Kise already reserved since last night. If Kuroko doesn't want to go, he can just cancel it right away. The perks of being a super celebrity, huh?
"Kurokocchi~ Let's have fun-ssu~!", Kise squeals happily.
As expected from #1 famous Japanese World Wide Model, every eyes are on to him. Everyone is watching but none dares to go near him. Why? Kise's aura is not friendly with anybody expect Kuroko today.
Kuroko is not the type that likes to play in the place like this, but he wants to appreciate Kise's hardowrk, so maybe he'll try his best to push aside all of his nightmares and enjoying himself now.
"Ne, ne, ne, Kurokocchi~", Kise smiles brightly as he tugs at Kuroko's hand
"What is it, Kise-kun?", he answer calmly while his eyes are wandering around, trying to find something that attracting him even for a bit.
"Let's have fun, okay? Let's do everything and get crazy-ssu...", Kise somehow feel really concerned about Kuroko's presence, so he his tone is a little bit serious and sad and somehow sympathetic at the same time.
Kuroko smiles as he felt the sincere in Kise's eyes. So he nods as a faint smile sliding up into his lips.
"Okay, Kise-kun. Make sure you make me satisfied and happy.", he laughs softly and then Kise tackles him as usual—and he got a punch on his stomach like usual too.
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It's already 7 PM and the last thing that Kuroko asked is to get into the Ferris Wheel. Kise ofcourse asked for it before the crew closed it and he got the approval.
They get into it and then Kuroko stares into the outside view from his seat. Kise who sit across him can only stares at him.
Kuroko lost in his own thoughts and sadness starts to creeping out from his deepest heart. He clencehs his teeth because he missed this place. The place where everything were starting anew and here he is again, facing his biggest memorial place.
"Kurokocchi?"
Kuroko snapped out from his thoughts and then he smiles at Kise, "Ah, yes, Kise-kun? Thanks for everything today. It's really fun.. I hope it last for a longer time..", he sigh.
Kise smiles and then took Kuroko's hands into his.
"Ne, Kurokocchi.. How about.. We re-new your memories here? Am i good enough for you to replace all the bitterness in your life? Am i capable enough for you to make you believe in me?", Kise looks at Kuroko in sincerity.
"K.. Kise-kun..", Kuroko somehow a little bit flustered against those sweetwords because he's not used to it anymore. And maybe.. giving himself and Kise a second chance of his life won't be that bad, right? I mean, God is not abandoning him, right?
"Um.. i.. i guess.. we can give it a shot..", Kuroko said as he scrates his cheek nervously.
Kise's smiles star to slowly cracking up into his face and then he immediately jumps into Kuroko.
"UWAAA KUROKOCCHI! I SWEAR I'LL MAKE YOU SUPER HAPPY IN YOUR ENTIRE LIFE!"
Kuroko softly chuckles and wraps his arms around Kise. Kise cups Kuroko's cheek and gently smiles towards him.
"Ne, Kurokocchi.. Is it too fast if i kiss you right here right now?"
Kuroko immediately blushed and he shrugs as he smile softly, "No, it's not, Kise-kun.."
Kise laughs softly and then he caress Kuroko's cheek with his thumb lovingly. "Close your eyes, Kurokocchi.. I'm shy-ssu..", he laughs nervously and then Kuroko closes his eyes.
But just as soon as he closes his eyes and Kise getting closer, another face came into his head. Kuroko immediately pushes Kise away harsly as he broke into cold sweat and his panic attacks start to show up.
Kise widen his eyes and he notice the change in Kuroko's behavior and features. He immediately understand it.
Kuroko can't do it.
He still can't do it.
He can't do it with anyone else than Aomine-kun yet.
He's not ready.
God. Help me.
"I-i'm.. a-..ano.. i-i'm sorry, Kise-kun..", he looks down in guilt and shame, trying to calm down his panic attacks.
Kise smiles and caress Kuroko's head lovingly, "It's fine, Kurokocchi. We can take it slowly, that's why i'm here, no?", he laughs softly.
"How about we have a dinner next week after my schedule? My treat-ssu~!", Kise gleams in happiness.
"O..Okay..", Kuroko still looking down at the floor and start to feel even worse than before.
"Nee, let's go home, okay? Today is a fun day and i hope you enjoy yourself too, Kurokocchi~ I'll drive you home-ssu~", Kise takes Kuroko's hands with him and walks with Kuroko to his car.
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After dropping Kuroko by his house, Kise waves and smiles brightly to Kuroko. After checking that Kuroko goes inside safely, Kise drives away.
He stopped for a while after a few hundred meters away and then he bangs his forehead to the steering wheel. He grits his teeth and clench the steer wheel with his becoming-with fists.
"Aomine.. Daiki.. I'll make you fucking regret your fucking stupid choice.. I'll make you regret it to your grave.. and I'll make Kuroko even happier.."
And then he swore under his breath and he start to laughs.
What did Kise think about?
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To be Continued
