Set in 3x04

Lorna finds a collage made by Nicky in her trash. She doesn't know why Nicky threw it away. It's lovely, what with all the magazine cutouts of places she wanted to go to for vacation, including Bora Bora Bora, and in the middle of it all, is a picture of a bride and groom with Lorna's head drawn on top of the bride's body and Nicky's is attached to the groom's. She hugs it to her chest and starts to cry as she runs back to her bunk. Her breathing is heavy as her sobs get more intense.

"She really loved you," Alex says as she comes up to the brunette girl. "She had it hidden under her bed and when they took her away to Max, they tossed everything she had. She would be glad you found it. It was supposed to be your Christmas present. I don't know why she didn't give it to you. She was your Secret Santa."

Lorna sniffles. "I was so pissed off at her back then. I don't think I stopped being mad until a months later. She was trying to tell me what I didn't want to hear. I need to say I'm sorry. She probably thinks she doesn't have a chance with me." Lorna wipes a falling tear off her cheek.

"Is that true? I mean...you're straight, Lorna. Did you go gay for the stay?"

"It was like that at first. Now that we've formed an inseparable bond, I'd date her in a heartbeat. I want to know what kissing her lips tastes like. The more I stare at this collage, the more I love the idea of Nicky and I being a couple. I want it to happen if...when...she gets out."

"I wish she was here to hear you say that!"

"So do I," Lorna says wistfully. She sets the collage against the side of her bed. "There...now it's mine."

"It looks perfect," Alex comments.

"Thank you!"

Set in season 4

It's lonely, dark, and cold as Nicky sits by herself in Max. She's not really alone. She actually has roommates, but she's afraid of them. They're like mini versions of Vee. They joke about hurting people and one of them is a homophobe who likes to kick Nicky hard in the stomach if she sobs at night and says Lorna's name in her sleep. She keeps herself awake all night long because one of these women may actually kill her just for being a lesbian or because they're in Max for a murder spree. She doesn't want to be almost beat to death like Red was. She takes a few shuddering breaths and wills herself not to make a single whimper.

"Whatcha lookin' at, huh?" a woman asks her roughly while getting way too close to her for comfort. Her hand snaps closed around Nicky's wrist and she violently shakes the blonde. "Answer me, you bitch!"

"Nothing," Nicky says while staring at the ground.

"You know what happened when you scratched that girl's name into the wall? You made us all angry! She is not part of your life anymore. Get that through your thick head." The lady yanks Nicky up by her hair and she's about to bonk her head on the toilet when a guard opens the door. "Nichols! You're out."

"They're sending me back to camp?" Nicky mumbles to the guard but mostly to herself.

"Yep. Come on, the van is on its way. Say your goodbyes."

The women grumble as the guard locks Nicky's wrists together and she follows him outside. She doesn't feel like herself while she's walking on this sunny, hot day. It's so bright. She's stiff and trembling. She doesn't know to get in the back of the van until the guard tells her to.

She squints her eyes at the Latina who's driving the van. "Yo, Ramos, how come Penn's not doing this?"

"She gets seizures," Ramos responds."Holy shit, this place has changed so much since you've been down the hill. Bennett is not an awesome officer anymore! He left Daya, so she had her baby alone. Soso and Washington are lesbian for each other and they were holding hands in the lake. Nichols, we ran into a lake and we were so free...at least for a little while! Don't worry about Coates here, he's cool with it. Romano started a religion with healing powers and Chapman and Caputo are on power trips. Chapman started a panty business because of the new job, making pink thongs, which is nice and everything, but she's so mean to Flaca. White girl thinks she knows everything! She cheated on Vause, who went insane for a while but now she's in the infirmary because of her drug dealer sending someone to try killing her. The one with crazy eyes and the twisty hair...she was writing porn, but they made her stop. Hayes turned Jewish. Boo got a one-day makeover from that he-she but then he-she attacked Gloria and got into the SHU. La Red's into Mr. Healy and Morello is married to this guy she met through prison letters. She proposed and they fucked while we were swimming."

Nicky's ears start ringing and she feels as though she's drunk. Ramos' voice gets smaller and smaller but somehow Nicky hears that Red's trusting an officer which didn't work out well for her or Diaz at all and now Lorna's Mrs. I Don't Know Who The Fuck You Are. She knows there has to be more to the story with Burset, because that woman doesn't have a mean bone in her body. Boo wouldn't make herself over in a million years. Norma, a woman who doesn't speak, is in charge of a group. Chapman's being a cunt. It's like Nicky's suddenly in an alternate universe. She feels bad for Vause and hopes her best friend will be okay. Caputo will always be Caputo. She's always wanted to swim in that lake. She wishes she could read porn right about now, even if it is from Warren. That crazy lady sure is interesting. Some of this other shit, she couldn't give a damn about. It's too hard to keep up with Ramos, even if one was listening hard. The only good news was that Soso had moved on from Nicky and Washington found a girl and got over her I'm in love with my straight best friend phase.

"Ramos, you're talking way too fast for my brain to comprehend," Nicky croaks. "I'm not sure if I'm hearing you correctly."

"They're eating breakfast now. You'll have to see it all to believe it, Nichols. I'm sorry...Morello was your girl, hmm?"

Lorna's perky face and bubbly personality form in Nicky's mind. She's not prepared for any of this. She wants Ramos to be joking or just spreading gossip like the Hispanics sometimes do, but then again, it's not hard to believe the whole white prison family went to shit with Nicky gone. She's the person that keeps her family sane. They don't make irrational decisions with her around. It's strange because she always thought Red was the smartest and least likely to fall for Healy's bullshit out of all of them, but no. It's Nicky fucking Nichols.

"Nichols?" Ramos adjusts the rearview mirror so she can see the blonde woman in the back. "Are you okay or is all this overwhelming? You know me, I tend to run off at the mouth."

"I'm thinking up a plan to help save this godforsaken place and put everyone back in their right mind."

"Buena suerte! That's Spanish for good luck with that."

"Thanks, Ramos."