Disclaimer: All I own is my computer and the FCC can take that over according to the label.

Title: I know it, and I'm mortified.

Rating: Mild M, because I'm in college now.

Summary: My favorite Drunken Duo takes over the world…in their skivvies! The bridesmaids won't be revisited, but they will be talked about. To My Favorite PDLD Writers! Takes place during "Bridesmaids Revisited". Rory and Finn become close friends. Jealousy and hi-jinks ensue!

Last time on Gilmore Girls:

"Finn." She exhaled.

"Yes love?" He asked distractedly

"I think—I'm going—to—explode." She gasped.

"You have no idea."

And she did.

Finn sat at the edge of his bed with his head in hands wondering what had just happened, or rather how it had happened. There he was innocently—maybe not innocently—straddling his best mate's girlfriend, both of them heaving and panting over one another, trying their bests not to do exactly what they wanted to—fuck each other senseless. Finn considered the possibility that it was just the alcohol encouraging their actions or Rory was only trying to get back at Logan for his infidelity, but he quickly threw away that possibility when she purred as he growled her name into her chest. Somehow he felt that this would be another memory—an acknowledged yet never talked about event, like the moments they had shared before. It was wrong, very wrong, but he hardly touched her and she hardly touched him. This was like a hug a very long and sexy hug on a bed without any touching—very simple. But soon Rory's legs were freed from between his thighs and slid to each side of him, the crotch of her oversized sweats grazing him ever so lightly. Finn was losing his grip on the situation at hand—before he was on his hands and knees—now his hips struggled to keep any kind of distance between them. Finn licked his lips and shut his eyes tightly as he felt the affects of the alcohol wear-off. The blood was rushing from his head and it was making him nervous. He shifted lower and Rory panted harder with this new position. As her chest rose with a sharp intake of air her breasts crept dangerously close to his mouth, he exhaled and saw her left nipple harden under his breath.

"Fuck it." He murmured and closed the distance between their hips, building the friction between them.

He slowly slid his body up and saw her face, to his surprise she was staring right at him but her normally bright blue eyes were replaced by lustfully dark blue orbs. As he moved she gasped and he kept her gaze. She knew what he was doing and she loved it. Finn let his breath ride down her body in ripples of heat as he moved down, hovering over her—watching her. As he brought himself up her body, Finn let his growing erection make contact with her only slightly. Rory's hips bucked underneath him of their own freewill and he growled again, but this time it wasn't English or coherent in any language for that matter, it was purely animalistic. He settled between her softly, she groaned and pulled him in closer with her legs, her hips bucked again taking his breath away for just a second. A sexy, sexy hug. Their erratic breathing brought them closer by millimeters. The slight friction between their clothes continued to build before he knew it

"Oh God!" she exploded.

The tremors of her orgasm reached Finn although he didn't climax himself. He enjoyed it and smiled to himself in shear disbelief. What am I going to do? His question was answered as Rory looked to him with a lazy grin and floated off to dreamland. He waited until her breathing settle to even intakes and exhales of air, and rolled off her slowly. Her arm moved and caught the inside of his elbow, he turned hoping that she wouldn't ask any more questions, that's how this all started. When he realized she was really sleeping he slipped from under her and left the room. He attempted to watch television for all of fifteen minutes before he realized that he wasn't going to be able to concentrate on anything for awhile. He went to his room to think. When that didn't work he opted for a shower—a very cold shower.

Rory had been asleep for about an hour when the very loud sound of a seventies-style audience laugh track woke her up. First she was dreaming of the beach, then she was naked on said beach and everyone was laughing at her; it was a nightmare. She rolled to her side and she was surprised that she was alone and, she realized, a bit saddened by it. But she need not worry of these things as her actions of the last two hours came to her in great detail, or maybe she should be worried. She didn't want to think of it. It was nothing—nothing to her—just like Bitsy and Maggie were to Logan. Misty and Betsy or Julie and Sarah, truly she could not remember their names. She groggily stomped out of her room and she was surprised to not find Finn, the television was on, but he was MIA. Maybe he's asleep. Rory felt another trickle of sadness but quickly brushed it off.

She sat with a cup of coffee watching the television mindlessly and without thinking picked up the remote and began to channel surf, there's never anything on when you actually want to watch television. She looked for anything cry-able, romantic comedies were the best, she didn't want to cry over someone dying she wanted to be so happy about someone falling in love—even if it was someone else. Bonus points if it had John Cusack, she loved John Cusack. Not because she thought he was especially good looking, her idea of especially good looking was the other guy from Must Love Dogs, but he just had something—she didn't know if it was the scripts he always picked out or his improvisational skills, but he was just...charming I guess. Different, he is definitely different. A mild smile crept to her face as she saw exactly what she was looking for

Say Anything. It was serendipity…

She heard the shower go on.

It had been a long time since Finn had to do this for himself. He swore after his first hand job he would never do it again and he never did, he always had 'help', until tonight. Finn washed his hair hoping by some unknown way that he could wash away his thoughts—it didn't work. After a night like tonight, most would try to wash it—whatever 'it' was—off their bodies but Finn didn't feel that same guilt. He felt an ache, a very familiar ache, the blood was still missing from his brain and he was unable to control the thoughts that were causing this oh-so-pleasurable pain. As Finn lathered his hair, one soapy hand lazily dropped to his chest and slid down to his abs that he worked so hard for, settling just below his belly button. He paused for a moment almost as if to debate one last time whether or not he really needed this. He continued to tangle one hand in his curly mane and let the other plunge farther down. With the newfound skin to skin contact Finn let out a breath of relief he hadn't known he was holding. He stroked himself up and down, trying not to think of anything or anyone in particular, just the pleasure—the slick pleasure of his large soapy hand rubbing and caressing himself just the right way with just enough pressure and just enough speed. He moaned as he brought himself up, slowing down until he was at the brink of erupting. He grunted and groaned and pumped in and out faster and harder, fucking his own hand harder and faster, until he was blinded by his release.

"Fuck." He couldn't say much else between his fits of fighting for oxygen—gasping and panting—heaving for air. He turned up the temperature on the water and let the scorching hot water wash over him, letting go of his thoughts, finally.

After what seemed like an eternity, Finn got out of the shower and sat on his bed with just a towel on. He sat there just thinking about the night, remembering the night, and contemplating all of its possible outcomes tomorrow morning. What was he going to do about Rory? or Logan? or himself? Finn didn't know how long he'd been sitting there trying to figure his life out when he heard the faint sound of crying, at first he figured it was the television, but when he heard her voice, he knew it was Rory. His stomach was in knots and his head was starting to hurt, he put his head in his hands. Sure he was sweet on her, but he didn't fancy her. She was hot and he'd have shagged her tonight had it not been for the large amounts of people who would be affected by any of the possible outcomes—including getting away with it. She wasn't his girl, but he didn't want her to be, did he? No, it would never work out, a pathetic attempt at a relationship. I can see it now, he mused. He didn't want to settle, she was a settler, but that was a conversation to have with his parents in about a month's time, not here, not now. He was brought back to reality by the sounds of the heartbroken girl in the next room. He got up and glanced at a clock, 3:06, usually he would just be getting home and hoping the girl on his arm was his girlfriend, but tonight he had no idea where she was and he really didn't want to think about it. Rosemary was a nice girl but she had her flaws, those flaws were quite similar to his: a short attention span and a very bad memory.

Rory sat calmly watching the movie, preparing herself to cry at the drop of a hat. When she heard to water go on, she knew Finn was awake and it was confirmed when she heard his faint murmurings, but she didn't think anything of it. Some people sing in the shower, he must mumble in the shower, that's perfectly normal, right? Rory loved this movie, it was a classic for a reason, and not to mention this was made during Lorelai's era—not to say that it's over or anything—but she knows it well. It's a great story: boy meets girl, they fall for each other, Dad of girl pushes them apart, but he's a crook, yada yada 'ding'. It was enough to make a grown woman cry, and this is exactly what she did. She allowed her emotions to run rampant cry and laughing so hard she didn't know what to do. She laughed so hard she cried, and cried, and cried. She was crying when she heard the shower cut off and laughing when she heard the bathroom door open and close. But now, when she heard his door open, she was crying. She wasn't sure why but she also wasn't focusing on it, just her raw emotions and the release of a really good cry, to let it all go—whatever 'it' was. And the presumable 'it' was leaving. She felt relieved, that is what all of this was for, to get rid of that weight. Her heart felt less heavy, her mind was clear, her vision was blurry and her head hurt, but once she stood up she would be fine. Just fine.

He walked in slowly, she never even looked up, but she knew he was watching her. She didn't stop for him; she just let it all out. It was time. He got closer and sat next to her. He hesitantly raised one arm over her shoulder and she tensed for a bit somewhat taken aback but when she didn't pull away he let it drop. She surprised herself and leaned into him. She rested her head lightly on his chest, which was covered by a plain white "I heart NY" T-shirt, and continued to cry. He tucked her head under his chin and rubbed her back murmuring through his breath. She couldn't understand his words but focused on his warm damp skin, the hum of his voice and his steady heart beat as she settled down. They sat there, together for a few minutes—he rubbing her back and she listening to him. 'The sun will rise, love', she realized that he was just repeating this and she didn't know what to make of it. She wasn't depressed, so it didn't give her hope, but it made her feel better nonetheless. She lifted up her head to see him—she sniffled a few times and reached for a tissue on the coffee table—the sad, worried expression she had expected to see, however, wasn't there. Finn was smiling.

"What?" She asked incredulously.

"Just something my mum always said to me when I cried," Beat. "Ya'know, twenty years ago." Finn began obviously trying to get a smile or a laugh out. "To hear her tell it, 'its going to be okay's and 'don't worry's, were poppycock since you couldn't really guarantee it or be sure about it because sometimes, it doesn't 'get okay' and you do 'have to worry', BUT, the sun will always rise—'and if it doesn't you have bigger things to worry about." Rory sighed at this.

"I guess you're right." She took a deep breath, straightened up and stood in front of him. She stifled a yawn and let it out through her nose, for a short while she felt the air against her ear. She stretched widely. That felt good, she thought and looked to him. "I think I've come to a conclusion."

"And that is?" He asked, taking the bait.

"Your mom and my mom would get long." She said simply and furrowed her brow in thought. "I have yet another conclusion." She announced serenely, taking hold of her cup of coffee as she sat on the opposite side of the couch, looking to Finn.

"And what is this new conclusion, pre tell?"

"I'm looking for a dare to be great situation." She quoted, lifting the cup to her lips but quickly lowering it and rising to get a fresh cup—this one was 'ice-cold'—as she offered when he shot her a questioning look.

"So, Mizz Gilmore, how do you plan to find this situation?" He asked from the couch not looking at her, not avoiding her gaze. He raised an eyebrow as she returned to the couch.

"I dunno, I guess it will just find me."

"But if you're looking for it, how will it find you?" She seemed to consider this and make a resolution in her head before grabbing the remote and putting it on mute.

"Two points for the Aussie." She stated.

"I wasn't aware that we were playing a game." He said smirking at her, a bemused expression on his face.

"We're always playing a game, 'the game of 'Life'." She said dramatically, she looked to him and seemed to consider something, his face, maybe. "Do you want to play a game?"

Her face was expressionless; she wasn't hinting at any innuendo or making fun. The game she was thing of was called Truth, it is about as simple as Truth or Dare, but the point was to actually tell the truth. Mostly it was just a way to get some dirt or to get to know someone. You could pass if you wanted to, but you only forfeited your chances at winning unless, of course, the remaining players—in this case 'player'—decided to pass as well. As Rory explained the rules, there was only one—you had to tell the truth, otherwise 'you compromise the integrity of the entire game and its creators', Finn listened and soon agreed.

"Okay, but no funny stuff."

"Sorry, but there's only one rule and that's not it." She smiled waving a pointed finger; Finn huffed and ran fingers through his still somewhat damp hair.

"I don't see why this game is so great, it doesn't even have dares."

"Well actually telling the truth is probably the biggest dare of all. Anyway, enough of that, on with the game, you first."

"Fine, um, what's your favorite color?"

"Euh! Wrong! I refuse to answer that question under the 'utter lameness' clause of '94." She said adamantly.

"I thought you said there was only one rule?" Finn argued

"Yeah but clauses are not rules, AND that question was lame. It's not pink by the way." Finn sunk back accepting to answer for the time being.

"Any other clauses I need to know about?"

"Nope."

"So when was your first kiss?"

"Sixteen."

"Really?"

"Yeah, when was yours?"

"Is that your question? Because I think that's cheating. You can't steal my questions. We can call that the 'Finn' clause of '06"

"No it isn't my question, I have one in mind, but you can still answer that question."

"Four."

"What? Your first kiss, real kiss?"

"Real kiss?" Rory nodded. "Eight, then. Don't give me that look; I thought I was in love." Finn countered defensively after getting a strange look from Rory.

"Eight and in love? When was the first time you had sex, nine?" She asked incredulously, not actually wanting to hear the answer to that question.

"No, is that your question? Because if it is, love, you're moving fast." Rory blushed slightly and tucked a piece of hair behind her hair nervously. She cleared her throat before responding.

"No, it isn't. My question is…" She began, taking a pause mid-sentence. She was going to ask what his greatest fear was, but something dawned on her.

"Yes?" Finn asked anxiously. Rory shifted, as if taking a new stand on this game all together.

"Finn, you're my boyfriend's best friend, right?" She asked expectantly.

"Well yeah, but that's not your question, is it?"

"I'm getting to it." She said. "And I'm your best-friend's girlfriend, right?" She continued with a glint of light shining in her eyes.

Finn eyed her suspiciously before answering, "What are you getting at, love?"

"Right?" She said almost impatiently, she was on a mission, but she didn't know what it was yet.

"Right, but—" She interrupted him.

"—Do you realize how cliché this is? Us, here, together?"

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I mean we're only setting ourselves up for one of two things."

"Which would be?"

"A tragic love story, including loss of friendship and a catastrophic love triangle, possibly a death of some sort."

"Or?"

"Or, just one of those things. The tragic love story, loss of friendship, catastrophic love triangle or death."

"Really? Is there anyway to prevent all of this?"

"Actually, now that you've asked, I have two solutions."

"Another ultimatum?"

"No, not exactly, well, not really, um, ok, kind of," She went on as Finn gave her 'the look', a look she recognized as the "Really? Well, I'll just look at you like this until you break down" look, usually it was supported by a raised eyebrow. Jess gave her that look a lot, since he didn't speak and all. "maybe? Okay, ok, OK! I get it! Yes an ultimatum." She gave in. Finn smiled to himself and gestured for her to continue.

"We could one, not speak to each other to avoid the obvious love vibe" She joked gesturing between them and lucky for her Finn got the joke because that could have been awkward. "or two, we could eliminate the middle man."

"Well not the first one, we obviously can't have that, those love vibes are just too strong…love." Finn said pausing for dramatic effect and he moved closer and dropping his to a gravely hum that reminded Rory of a very sweaty, very tan, and very dirty cowboy, complete with hat, lasso, chaps, sexy Australian accent and nothing else. She could almost feel the scratchy stubble graze her cheek and under her fingers as she—"So what should we do, kill him?" Finn asked half seriously, interrupting her thoughts, as if to ask if she really wanted two sugars instead of three, the slightest hint of sexual playfulness in his voice and eyes.

"Not yet." She answered back thickly with a similar expression and blushed after being brought out of her reverie.

"So love, what, pray tell, do you suggest?" Finn asked calmly leaning in closer a slight smirk playing on his lips and in his eyes. Rory leaned in dangerously closer and opened her mouth to speak just above his lips but moved toward his ear and whispered breathily.

"We have…to…be…friends!" She kissed him lightly on the cheek and tried to ignore the stubble that scratched her lips. She smiled widely and subconsciously licked her lips.

"Friends?" He asked skeptically. She nodded, and he narrowed his eyes considering this. "Are you sure you can handle it? I'm a pretty intense friend."

"Well, I've done pretty well tonight, haven't I?"

"I suppose, although I must say I've been a better friend to you than you to me." Finn smirked and Rory shrugged.

"Well, we'll just have to change that, won't we?" She asked not quite waiting for a response. "Anything you want, in the friend department, I'm there. Don't hesitate to ask."

"Okay" Finn said slowly considering his options to even out all of his 'friendly' duties of the night. "I have this, this crick in my neck and I just can't seem to shake it. Rory, oh buddy, oh pal, could you take care of that for me?" Rory felt slightly worried, Finn had a grin on his face that would have made Jack Nicholson think twice.

"Sure, one friendly back massage coming right up" Rory had given a back massage or two in her day and found that it was a lot less pain full of your back if you have a massage table, or straddle them. Since the former was currently unavailable, she told Finn to lie on his stomach and climbed atop him. She massaged him through the thin material of his shirt and followed her instincts, i.e. his groans, to tell her what to do next. She lasted for about half an hour before she got tired, but failed to realize Finn had fallen asleep ten minutes ago. She slowly climbed off of him and softly kissed his left temple before scampering off to bed herself.

natasha's note: As you can tell the last chapter wasn't the end and this has become a complete AU especially since I don't watch GG on the CW. I have a few things that I want to do with this fic before its ending including a trip down under for Finn!!! Yeah, that's it. Sorry this took so long. Thanks for all the reviews you guys!!!!

Next time on I know it: Breakfast! A visitor from the past. And Logan calls….again.