A/N:Here comes one of my crazy OCs, Barry the Dinosaur. He's Sasuke's best friend...whether or not he's an imaginary friend or a real dinosaur who uses outdated words because he's been stuck in a tar pit for billions of years...you decide.


Chapter 4 Barry the Dinosaur

Sasuke was bored. After the power had gone back on-and once Sakura's crazy-as-hell mother had fled and gone back to her wax museum job, or whatever-he had resigned himself to reading yet more of his favorite mystery series. He loved the main character. While he did so, he also read his other favorites.

"Go, Trunks! You're so awesome!" Sasuke cheered out loud, making sure no one was around to hear it (not that they cared enough to hear it.)

Most of the other neighbors in the peaceful-er, wartorn vicinity known as Konohamehameha-that's the last time you'll see this joke, I swear, were too busy preparing for the arrival of the crazy woman several hours later. He could see people hiding in their storm doors and they had boards on over their windows for some reason, wait, what?

He saw a man with black hair walking down the street-except for the fact that the guy was not wearing a shirt, which Sasuke promptly pretended not to notice. The odd thing about him was that he was singing out loud, and his voice was even better than Sasuke's was.

Sasuke didn't want to even hear the man's great singing, so he slammed the window down, causing the man to look up. He paused upon noticing the shut window.


"NO, DON'T YOU WANT TO HEAR MY BEAUTIFUL, IF NOT LOVELY SINGING VOICE? I WAS ONLY SINGING FOR THE SAKE OF MY BELOVED MARY-CHAN! HAVE YOU EVER SEEN HER RADIANT BEAUTY?"

Sasuke frowned and ignored the old man's crazy screaming. "I don't really want to hear your voice anyway, you old knucklehead!"

"What did you say?" The man said, tilting his head to the side in confusion.

Sasuke sighed, "I said, you are a knucklehead!"

"I'm a knickerbocker? I'm not exactly in the mood for a knickerbocker glory, but maybe I could go out to a grand first-class restaurant."

"I said you are an idiot."

"A midget? No one's called me that before." He said, chuckling.

"Forget I said anything," Sasuke growled.

"Oh, boy, and to think, I was going to invite the person who takes me to dinner out to the ancient and cursed haunted swimming pool, the Konoha pool, from which no one has escaped alive..."

'Cursed? That sounds like a bad idea. No way in hell am I buying that mumbo-jumbo.'

"It is true! Very, very, true!" A creepy, if not annoying, voice said from behind him.

Sasuke jumped back in time to see a weird creature covered in green. "Who are you?"

"I'm your fairy godmother, sweetie pie. Just kidding, I'm your worst nightmare. I'm Lucia, the daughter of the devil. Wanna buy the pool? We've had an incredibly low sales time for some reason...why does no one want a cursed pool?" The green creature wailed.

"Hey, stop your fake crying. Tell me something, isn't it because you're the daughter of the devil? Maybe you could change the sales pitch into something that makes sense," Sasuke added.

"But no one wants to buy it unless it sounds cool!" Lucia cried, now bursting out into actual tears of despair.

"Relax," Sasuke said, patting her head, "I will make you stop crying...by refusing to buy into your stupid crap and sending you away."

"What? Stop being so meannnnnn..." Lucia whined. "I will make you suffer a horrible fate unless you give in to me!"

"No, now go away," Sasuke said.

"Please..." She begged, starry eyes full of wet tears, eyes that no one but the cruelest person alive could possibly say no to-or perhaps the dumbest person could.

"No," He said.

At that moment, Barry attacked, clamping his sharp teeth onto the evil, wicked fairy's leg, causing her to scream in pain.

"Ah, my battery is dying! Helppppppp!" She screamed, as suddenly she fell to the floor.

"That was a doll? A talking, sentient doll? Man, I need a life." Sasuke said, wiping his brow.

"Aren't I alive?" Barry asked, following behind him, his leash trailing on the floor.

"Yeah, you are," Sasuke said, "You're my precious little Barry...who needs to get a life."

"Wahh...you're mean!" Barry cried.

"I enjoy being mean," Sasuke taunted.