Chapter 4: So Fuck you too
Disclaimer: Batman and all characters associated with the Batman, Justice League, Superman and DC Universe franchises are all owned by DC. Batman was created by Bob Kane and Bill Finger.
Dick's POV
Unfortunately it had been over sixteen hours since we last saw Bruce and we still weren't able to track down his location or get any clue as to where Jason might be. Jason had gotten good at planning and something told me that his plan had been forming in his head for a long time, maybe even before we dragged him back to Arkham, something in the back of his mind. I remember when I first fought him to get the mantle of Batman, I had written him off as lost because he chose not to get help and then I offered to help him again when I was Batman. The second time he refused I saw something in his eye that I had never seen before, I wonder how long it had been there in his eyes, a tired look, one that you wear when the world takes a dump on you and it hasn't stopped in a long time. I don't know if he had ever been happy for even a second since he had been back or if he had even had a good day in his new life.
There was something in his eyes that told me that he was not even sure of the paths and choices so far, but he couldn't allow himself to turn away from them. Not until something happened, but I don't know what that something was. I doubt if Jason himself knew what that was. All I know is that if we didn't find it soon, there might not be a Jason left for us to bring back.
"No one in the League of Shadows has had dealings with him in the recent months and none of their transactions seem to be related," said Damien as he brought out pictures of different lowlifes on the table. "These guys are your typical any dirty job thugs, now they were all found beaten up at a funn house that used to be a stomping ground of Mad Hatters until Bruce shut it down five years ago. Right now they're being held by the police for questioning, but they seem to have very little information on what they were doing and I doubt they would know where to meet. Jason paid them up front and told them to guard the fun house, but they never knew what they were guarding."
"I doubt we're going to find anything from them directly," I said before picking up the reports of their statements while Tim looked over the other information. I can't help but notice he's not wearing his uniform, he never really got used to being in Jason's old identity, one that Jason forged himself. I offered him Nightwing but he said that was mine and really, if I had a choice, I would have rather have stayed Nightwing than take on Bruce's cowl. "Does anyone know where he found them from?"
"They all have one thing in common, he found them in Washington," said Tim as he had all the files on the thugs in the big screen, each one came from some part of the same state, Washington. "Now there always seems to be someone who deals in these men, someone who picks the guys for the operation. There are exactly three in Washington, but the main one you want to hit up first is a guy by the name of Zeke in Seattle."
"Huntress is near that position, I think I can get her to snag that guy and pump him for information," said Barbara as she started send the message to Huntress. I always loved that she told you things ten seconds before she did when it was a good idea because she knew you were going to tell her to do so.
"Alright then, I think I'll go have a talk with those thugs myself," said Dick as he put on his cowl and walked towards the batmobile before adding over his shoulder, "Damien, I want you to stay here and be ready to move out on my orders."
"Don't be too long, I can't stand being here without knowing where my father is," he replied and I could see that his impatience would be a problem. I can only hope to keep him contained for now. Damien reminds me a lot of Jason, every bit as violent, but with the skills to make it so, much like Jason is now. Too much like Bruce.
Bruce's POV
He had picked warm clothes, meaning we were somewhere north with a colder climate, but that could be outside of the United States as well. I didn't know if he had moved me out of the country at that point, but I waited for the food to see if it would give me any further clue. It was just what I expected, he had prepared fried rice, something that wouldn't be growing in the climate unless he had taken me to Japan, but that was far into League of Shadows territory. Thalia wouldn't like me being kept like this and would be monitoring the conversation to make sure Jason didn't try anything hasty. The chopsticks were also your common everyday disposable chopsticks except they weren't in their sleeves, instead they were stuck in the rice bowl. He wasn't letting any clues into my line of sight so the only option I had would be to talk him down. This goes past my comfort level, but I can talk to him, he was my son once…it seems so long ago though.
"Aren't you going to sit down," he said as he casually started to eat his rice, his face not displaying any emotion this time. I didn't know if he were calm or if he had learned to hide his rage. "I didn't poison your food. It would make all of this unnecessary if I did and I need you alive."
"What do you expect to gain out of this," I asked as I sat down and took the chopsticks in my hand. I didn't expect him to poison my food, not after all the trouble he had gone through getting me there when he could have killed me back at the fun house. "You know I can't give you any of the help you need. I'm not the right person to tell anyone how to get over problems or to give comfort. Barbara would have been better to call or maybe even talk to Raven, she's good with helping people get over emotional traumas."
He didn't say anything at first, he just stared down at his rice like he was thinking over those options I had just told him before taking another mouthful of rice. This is the first time we've ever had a meal together in just over a decade but it feels like we haven't done it in decades. The whole situation is awkward as an emotionally closed man tries to talk down a lost boy from the ledge that he's been leaning over for years, the same ledge he left the boy on. I remember the smile he had on his face when he first became Robin, a smile I wish I could have seen when he was gone and the only face I could think of was the tired, pained expression he had on his face when he died.
At first I never took much thought into pictures before. They were just pieces of evidence that would help in investigations, noticing the minute details of the crime as I exposed the truth hidden under the seedy façade. I never realize how much pictures could mean until I found a picture that Alfred had taken of Jason's first successful patrol, the smile on his face was captured on a piece of film bringing a sensation I couldn't describe. Like Jason was alive right there for me to see, a moment kept him alive, captured for all time in the photos that Alfred had taken that I had thought of burning to remove evidence. I was so glad I didn't that I was crying in joy as I ran to ask him if he had any, scaring him half to death with my breaking of composure.
A photo album became my greatest addiction and tormentor for the next few months; I'd always look through it before I finally gave into sleep, remembering first Christmases, birthdays that I had neglected, and the rare moments in which we seemed like a family. There weren't that many pictures, barely three pages in a photo album, but they were enough to get me by as I came to a realization that Jason was gone. I still had them in my drawer, but I hadn't told Jason that. I hadn't told him a lot of things I should have told him a long time ago. I'm sorry Jason, I wish I could have been a better father,' was all I could think of. And then he spoke.
"You know, Bruce, I did forgive you for not saving me," he said, his voice not showing any sign of emotion, but I knew that he was speaking true. "I blame myself for that, I should have listened to you and not gone off looking for my birth mother. I also don't blame you for not killing the Joker anymore. Took me a while to realize that if you would had done that, he would have won. You almost did kill him…I heard about it all from Superman. That's not what bothers me or the reason I needed to talk to you."
"Then why did you do this," I asked, this time I wasn't speaking as his former mentor, I was speaking as his father…former father.
"You don't get it do you," he said as he looked at me as if I had done something wrong. Maybe I did, but I didn't know what. "Do you remember what you said to me in your will? Do you remember what you had left me or more importantly what you had said to me?"
"I told you I regretted making you Robin," I replied, something that I had regretted ever since his death. "I wanted you to get help, to get better and I knew that I was the reason that you were so troubled."
"That's just it, you told me that you regretted making me Robin," he said, this time I could hear emotion coming into his voice. I could see it flowing into his face and dripping down his body. Sorrow. Anger. "How could you try to get me to come back all these years and just when I'm getting everything right in my head you slam the door right in my fucking face? What kind of father does that to their son?"
"Jason, I failed you as a father. I didn't save you and I broke you Jason. All those years I tried to help you overcome your rage, but I didn't know how to do that. I was selfish back then. I was alone and I needed a Robin by my side. Then you appeared, stealing my tires, and I thought maybe I could help you become something better than that. All I did was lead you to your death and I don't know how to make things right for you."
"Bruce, when you told me you regretted me being Robin, do you know what you were telling me," asked Jason as he leaned over and looked me in the eyes. "Every Robin is like a son to you. Telling me you regretted making me Robin is like telling me you regretted making me your son. Do you understand that? Could you imagine how fucked up you would be if your father told you right before he died that he regretted having you as a son?"
"I did nothing good as your father. I neglected you, I was demanding of you, I wasn't there for you when you needed me most."
"The day I died was the worst day of my existence. The worst part of it all wasn't the beating I felt or the fact that I didn't save my birth mother, the very same one I had been chasing after. It was that my own birth mother had sold me out to the Joker that day. She delivered me on a silver platter to that psycho. Did you know that? She didn't tear up or cry as he beat me, she only cringed at the blows, never begging him to stop or shield me from the blows. The only thing she cared about was her own life. I know mothers aren't supposed to be like that. My real mother, the one who helped raise me before you did, she was everything a mother should be. She allowed me to rest my head, she would teach me how to cook when she was too weak, tell me stories to get my hopes up, shield me from bad men even when they hit her or forced her to give up their body.
"She truly loved me up until those drugs took her life and she will always be my real mother, not that…not the one who gave birth to me. I'm not Jason Haywood, I'm either Jason Todd or Jason Wayne. Even though you neglected me you also tried to do right by me, helping me when you could even though you were strict. I tried everything I could to be Dick, but I failed at it and I knew it disappointed you. Every time I talked back I just wanted you to take notice that I was me and to acknowledge me. But you were still a father to me and that horrible day, Bruce, you were the only person to try and do right by me. Why the hell do you have to regret me being your son? Don't you see that I wanted to be your son? You're all that I have left to keep me straight in this world, the only tie that I have to the best thing that ever happened to me since my mother died."
"Jason…," there is so much I wanted to say to him that moment as I looked at the tears that are forming in his eyes and leaking down his chin. I couldn't say anything then, all the words were catching in my throat and all I could do was sit there, as if I were waiting for something. I should have said something and I knew it right then, but nothing came to me. I was rendered speechless.
"So that's it then," he said, the anger was taking form, but still the sorrow dripped from its edges, threatening to drown his words like his tears. "So is this what I mean to you now. So now I'm nothing to you? Is that it? You know what, fuck you too, Bruce!"
He stormed out of the room into one of the other rooms in the building, leaving me sitting there with the one opponent I couldn't face, my thoughts. And I began to wonder where I had gone wrong, but soon I'm questioning when I got it right.
Bob's POV
I'm beginning to seriously regret ever letting Bill talk me into letting hi tag along on this job. First he pulls a stupid stunt as to try to take Batman's mask off and now he's been playing with another party for profit. This is risky as hell and I'd rather just get the pay I got coming to me or deal with the rest of Batman's team, anything but involve this psycho in the mix. Not like I have much of a choice now, Bill already told him my name and I'm either in or I'm dead. Probably will die anyway, but hell at least I got a chance this way. Bill won't live either way. If he makes it out of this I'll shoot him myself for doing exactly what I told him not to and that's double cross our employer. Few live double crossin' the Red Hood, but I'd sooner do that then get on the bad side of HIM.
"Yeah so they're all up there alone," said Bill as he's talked to our other employer over the phone, the deal broker who told us, or rather Bill, about the new opportunity. Freackin' idiot knew I didn't want a part of this but he couldn't stop running his mouth. "So what do ya want us to do, shoot up the place or…alright I got that. Yeah we can wait here for him, but he'll have our pay right? Okay, yeah call ya if anything knew develops."
"Great now that guys coming down here, I ain't getting involved any further," I said as I tossed down my beer, hoping these words won't come to be my death. If they do I'll make sure Bill goes before me or with me.
"Look you know how I need the money," he said and that's how it always starts with these stupid ideas of his. "We do this job and we don't have to worry about money for a while. I'll do all the work and make sure that he talks mostly to me, you won't need to talk to him at all."
"Better not have to," I warned him as I poured myself another glass of beer. "Involving the fucking Joker, what the hell were you thinking?"
