Chapter 4

These Twists and Turns of Fate

Jude flopped on the bed as Tommy unpacked a few things from his suitcase. Another unpleasant surprise had met them when they unlocked the door. One, yes ione/i, king-sized bed was in the room. Jude had claimed it and it looked like Tommy would be spending his time on the leather couch. Luxurious for sitting? Yes. Great for sleeping on? No. Tommy glanced over at Jude who was busy flipping through a travel guide. Despite his jet lag he was eager to get into the city and explore. Jude however, seemed content to explore the fragile pages of the leaflet she was holding.

"How about we go into the city and poke around a little bit?" She ignored him a turned a page. Tommy sighed in frustration. "Jude, we're in Paris, France in Europe! The city of love and lights or something like that! Only one of the most historic and beautiful cities on the planet. Let's explore a little." Jude tossed the brochure onto the bedside table and checked her watch.

"I want to take the metro, and go down that waterway at night to see the Eiffel Tower all lit up." She said, not quite answering him.

"We'll do all of that, I promise." Jude nodded and stood up.

"I'll be ready in fifteen minutes." She walked to the bathroom and shut the door. Tommy sunk onto the couch. Fifteen minutes for Jude meant a half hour in reality. He picked up the remote and flicked on the T.V. All the channels were in French, no big surprise there, but with Tommy's broken French he was able to catch the drift of the soap opera unfolding on the screen.

"What's up?" Jude asked 27 minutes later, stepping out of the bathroom.

"Well," Tommy began, engrossed in the show, "Marguerite's mother had an illegitimate son with Marguerite's husband before she meant Pierre, who is her husband's gay lover. Now their two kids are trying to solve the mystery of their grandfather's death and…" he stopped as a pillow collided with his head. Tommy turned to glare at Jude.

"Are you ready to go?" she said in response to his look. Confused, Tommy got up, grabbed his jacket, and followed her out the door.

Walking behind her to the elevator, Tommy could smell her body wash and the slight smell of her shampoo as he slipped on his jacket. He followed her into the elevator and leaned back against the wall, closing his eyes…

Flashback

Tommy was sitting on their king-sized bed flipping through channels without really watching. He could make out the sound of running water in their master bathroom and the sound of Jude's voice as she sang loudly. A smiled crept onto Tommy's face and he flicked the 'off' button on the T.V. Slowly he pushed opened the almost-closed door. The mirrors were heavily drenched in condensation from the hot water, and steam danced above the shower. The blurry outline of Jude's body was just visible through the water-splashed door.

"I try, to go on like I never knew you

I'm awake, but my world is half asleep

I pray for this heart to be unbroken,

But without you all I'm going to be is…

INCOMPLETE!"

Tommy smirked at Jude's cover of the Backstreet Boys. He pulled off his shirt and jeans and was left in only his boxers. He opened the door to the shower, "Mind if I join you?" Jude jumped in surprise, and quickly covered herself as best she could. Tommy's face softened and he moved his hands to hers, feeling the ring that would be replaced by a wedding band in three days. Their eyes met, and locked.

"Please don't hide from me…" he pleaded quietly. Although the fear was evident in her face she allowed him to pull her hands away. He kissed her softly. "Why are you scared, girl?" he asked, his eyes searching hers. She turned away and shook her head. She turned the water off and stepped out of the shower, grabbing her towel off the hook. Tommy stood in the rapidly-cooling shower, confused, for several minutes. They had agreed to wait until they were married to have sex, but he hadn't realized how scared Jude was. Finally he too grabbed his towel off the hook, and changed into pajama pants.

"Jude?" Tommy walked through the house, looking for his bride-to-be. He even checked the garage, but her mustang hadn't moved. It was pretty chilly to take a walk; at least he hadn't heard her grab a jacket… Tommy moved onto the backyard, and could just make out Jude's outline on the far bench. She was sitting Indian-style; looking at the darkened sky, her hands were wrapped around her arms for warmth. He cocked his head and walked over to her. She looked at him and her face flushed before she looked at the ground. He sat down beside her and waited for an explanation. Several minutes later, none had come, so he initiated the conversation.

"Jude?" he started, hoping she would look at him, she didn't, "Why are you scared to let me see you?" he didn't need to elaborate more, or make his meaning plainer. She shrugged in reply.

"Girl, look at me." Jude slowly turned to face him, but couldn't manage to meet his eyes. He lifted her chin until she was forced to. "Why are you scared?" Jude shuddered and broke a little.

"I'm not pretty…" Tommy stared at her incredulously.

"What are you talking about? You're absolutely gorgeous."

"No… You've dated models, and moviestars, and goodness-knows who else. I can't compete with them." She was starting to cry. "I feel like every time you look at me you're comparing me to them." She quickly looked at the ground again. Tommy took a deep breath, we wasn't sure what to say.

"Jude…" he drifted off, "Jude, I know I've dated a lot of other girls, but they're the ones that should be jealous of you. You are more beautiful on the inside and out, than any of them could ever hope to be. When I look at you I don't see your imperfections, no matter how few they may be, I see this amazing rockstar, who's confident, and smart, and talented, and gorgeous. I want to be with you because I love you. Those plastic girls don't have anything on you." Jude was quiet as she mulled over what he had said.

Jude sniffed and cracked a smile. "Really?" Tommy laughed softly.

"Yes, really. He kissed her forehead.

"I love you… and I'm sorry," He took her hand in his.

"Don't be," he replied kissing her fingertips.

End of Flashback

DING The elevator doors swung open and they could see the lobby and its occupants. Jude waited until an elderly couple exited before she too left at a quick pace. Tommy, who hadn't been paying attention jogged up to her.

While the doorman attempted to hail a cab for them, Jude danced around in the falling snow. Slowly, she shut her eyes tight, tilted her head back, and stuck out her tongue; attempting to catch the flakes. Her matching hat, scarf, and mittens were quickly becoming wet as the snow hit them and melted, but Jude had withdrawn into her own world, and had failed to notice. She snapped back to reality as the doorman opened the door to their cab. Jude rushed over, desperate to get in before Tommy. She didn't see the patch of ice in front of the door and her feet slid from underneath her. Instinctively Tommy reached out an arm to brace her, but Jude, instead, grabbed his shirt in a desperate to keep herself upright. Tommy lost his balance due to the unexpected added weight. Jude fell, landing on her butt hard; Tommy fell shortly after, just managing to brace himself with his arm. So there they sat in the middle of an icy sidewalk. Jude's legs were splayed in different directions, and Tommy was supporting himself on his arms, over Jude's stomach, perpendicular to her. The pair looked at each other before they both broke out in uncontrollable laughter. Tommy pulled himself up, and assisted Jude, attempting to avoid falling again. In that time a frazzled, hurried, looking man had taken their cab. When the doorman moved to hail another, Tom held his hand out. "Merci, nous promenade." (Thank you, we're walking) The man nodded and moved back to his position by the door. Jude and Tommy set on down the street, both still smiling, and both feeling just a little more hopeful.

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After a full day of sight-seeing and amazing food Jude and Tommy were back in their room. Jude was scribbling something rapidly in her journal; Tommy was marking a route for the next day. To both Tommy and Jude's surprise the day had seen less hostility than they had anticipated. After the ice-breaking accident (no pun intended) that morning Jude seemed to realize that maybe there was hope for them, and while she hadn't been warm and fuzzy, she certainly had complained a lot less than usual.

The Eiffel Tower had been their first stop. The long way to the top was worth it as they rode up in the glass elevator. The whole city was visible, and with the falling snow Tommy was forcefully reminded of an old love story his mother had told him as a child. Jude went through an estimated three rolls of film taking pictures from every square inch of the platform. Tommy was in charge of the video camera and he had been careful to narrate most of their journey. As promised Tommy had purchased tickets for the metro and they rode to the fairie as the sun began to set. As they rode on the waterway the snow was falling harder and it was obvious Jude was chilly. Knowing she would die before she took his jacket, he opted to get a hot chocolate for each of them instead.

"Here you go," he said holding out the Styrofoam cup. She looked at Tommy for just a moment. Just long enough for him to lose his baring and desperately pray for just this moment they could be like they used to. Without taking the cup she turned back and looked at the water, refusing to say a word. Tommy sighed and finished his own hot chocolate. After several minutes Tommy excused himself and left the drink on the railing next to Jude. When he returned to film some more of the journey the cup was no where to be seen, and Jude had the slightest hint of a chocolate mustache.

Now, looking over at Jude, who was completely engrossed with the beat inside her head, he smiled slightly, for the first time in months, at the present.

Nighttime found Tommy on the couch, as predicted. He was struggling to get comfortable with the spare blanket he had found. The armrest made an uncomfortable pillow and if he slunk down any further the couch didn't support his whole body. Tom gasped as a pillow hit his head for the second time that day. Blearily he looked over at Jude with the little light from the window. Her back was to him and she was breathing shallowly.

"Thank you," he whispered into the darkness, and, adjusting the pillow, drifted off to sleep.