A floor above the Mystery Shack, a pair of pre-teens are looking at an assortment of items on the floor. Mabel rubbed her hands together in anticipation while Dipper finished writing a checklist on the notepad.
"We're all set," he said, putting down the notepad and looking at his sister. "So, which one do you want to start with?"
Mabel looked at him while fighting to keep her squeals contained.
-
Ford looked up from the Book of the Damned as Mabel walked into his study.
"Hi Grunkle Ford," she greeted him loudly. "Can I knit here? It's too hot up in the attic to knit."
"Of course, Mabel," Ford agreed. Mabel gave him a quick "THANKS!" and jumped on the couch. She yanked out a partially-completed purple-and-pink sweater and the purple and pink yarn balls from the bag she brought with her. She settled down on one side of the couch and began to knit. The room filled with the sound of her knitting needles clacking softly.
Ford tried to focus on the book, but one of his ears began to twitch at every clack. After a few minutes, he decided to close the book and observe his great-niece. She seemed to be making a lot of progress with that sweater in the few minutes that she was in this room. He padded towards her and settled down in front of a pink yarn ball. Looking at her to make sure she didn't see him, he whapped the yarn ball with a great paw, sending it rolling away to the other side of the room. Grinning, he turned to the purple ball and nearly jumped; Mabel had moved closer to his face without him realizing it.
"I saw that," she whispered, grinning. She then raised a finger and playfully poked him on the nose. "BOOP!"
-
That afternoon, the Mystery Shack had to close up early for the day. For some reason, the Shack became overrun by stray cats. After chivvying the tourists from the Shack (and Stan half-heartedly trying to sell a few cats to them), everyone had to catch and move the cats out of the Shack. Ford was the most successful in getting them to leave, pouncing in their midst and roaring at them, making the felines yowl and scamper away.
Dipper and Mabel looked at each other and shrugged while putting a couple of cats into a box.
-
"Great Uncle Ford, do you ever get the urge to scratch something?"
Ford looked down at his great-nephew. They were walking around the Shack that late had managed to clear the Shack of cats. Stan was lounging on the couch on the porch, drinking his third can of Pitt Cola.
"Scratch something?" he asked.
Dipper looked down at his Grunkle's paws. "You know, to sharpen your claws? I read that cats do that; it's why they sell scratching posts at the pet store."
Ford raised a paw and unsheathed six claws. "Oh, THAT. Actually, I've been maintaining these claws for a while now. I have to do my scratching away from the Shack."
"Really? Why?"
"Because Stan caught me scratching at the totem pole a few days ago and kept yelling me about it for a solid hour," explained Ford, pointing to something behind them. Dipper turned around and spotted the long gashes on the bottom part of the totem pole.
"Yeah, well, I had to find a way to explain that off when the tourists ask me about it," said Stan. "I'm building up the legend of Eduardo Dicey-Fingers, mad Colombian scientist, for the past couple of days now."
Ford growled a little, then abruptly stopped when he spotted a bright red dot hitting the base of the totem pole.
"Did you see that?" Ford asked Dipper.
"See what?" Dipper asked innocently.
"That-that red light. Right THERE!"
At the last word, Ford bounded towards the light. He nearly hit his head on the base of the totem pole.
"Woah, careful there, Ford!" Stan called out, semi-rising from the couch as he saw the totem pole sway from the impact.
Ford bounded after the red light, chasing it in circles, crashing against a few trees and knocking over a few signs ("FORD!"). When he turned around and faced the Shack, he spotted a shadow on the roof and abruptly stopped. The dot disappeared as the shadow gave a squeak and dropped down on the platform on the roof.
"Mabel?" Ford called out.
Up on the roof, a slim arm in a pink sweater went up and waved at him. "Hi Grunkle Ford!"
Mabel called out. "I'm just lying down here, doing nothing suspicious!"
"Good heavens, whatEVER are you doing up there, Mabel Pines?" said Dipper in a highly unconvincing tone of concern. Ford turned to look at Dipper; he found his great-nephew was edging sideways towards the porch, looking completely guilty.
Ford started to piece together the events. "Wait, that was all you two?" he asked, looking at Dipper.
The boy looked down at his feet, shuffling them. "Well, Mabel and I were wondering how much 'cat' you were now," he admitted. "And we kind of came up with some tests to check our theory." He took another sideways step towards the porch.
Ford looked up at Mabel. "The yarn ball," he said.
"And a bonus nose boop!" Mabel admitted from the roof.
"And the cat invasion?" asked Stan, leaning forward and giving Dipper a look.
Dipper gave a nervous laugh. "I guess the catnip spray was more potent than we realized..."
"Really? I thought Stan tried on a new cologne and didn't think about it," said Ford in surprise.
"And then the scratching question and the laser pointer," said Stan, completing the list of "cat" things the children did for today and ignoring Ford's comment. "So, what didja learn today?"
"Uh...that Great Uncle Ford is about 95% cat?" said Dipper, scratching the back of his head.
"And?" prodded Stan; from the corner of his eye, he spotted Ford quietly approach his nephew from behind. Stan hoped that Mabel would keep quiet, but a muffled squeal from the roof alerted Dipper to the danger. He turned around just as Ford pounced on him.
"AAAAAAAAAH! I'M SORRY, GRUNKLE FORD! I'M-AAAAH!"
Ford had grabbed Dipper's middle and enveloped the child in his paws. Dipper was laughing and groaning at the same time as Ford gave his grand-nephew a noogie with one paw. Stan laughed and dropped his can of Pitt Cola to approach them.
"This is how you give a noogie, nerd!" yelled Stan as he put his Sphinx twin in a headlock and gave Ford a noogie.
Up on the roof, Mabel yelled, "Hey, I want in on that Sphinx bonding! Wait for me!"
Author's Note: I did a bit of research on the effects of catnip on big cats. One sanctuary confirmed that some big cat breeds are affected by catnip EXCEPT for their resident lion!
