[A/N: For the eventual pairing I'm thinking Tsuru x Haku. When I was thinking about the pairing yesterday, I'd originally thought Tsuru x Hinata, Neji, Shino, or Ino, but then I remembered Androgenous Haku. Perfect for a Bisexual, or at least I'd think. Logically, since I'm not about to make any characters futanari, an androgynous gender ambiguous character would be best. Of course, this won't be until Shippuden. I want Tsuru to angst and stress over her bisexuality and crushes on Hinata and someone else. And no, I'm not gonna have a harem with characters of both genders. ]
[A/N: I'm also going to explain why Tsuru doesn't have her Sharingan eye covered despite having an implanted Sharingan next chapter.]
[A/N: I apologize that I originally posted this chapter in code. That sometimes happens since I write in a font.]
Everything is owned by Kishimoto except for Tsuru. Many of Kakashi's lines, and some of Naruto's, are direct quotes from the Naruto manga, and are owned by Kishimoto.
Chapter 2 - Team Seven Introductions
第2章 - チーム7の紹介
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"Why are we the only cell whose teacher hasn't shown up yet?" Naruto grumbled to himself as he looked out the door.
"Patience, young toad, for fate favors those who slow down and think," I said in a sage-like tone, making Naruto snort.
"What the hell is that? And you told me that fate's a load of bullcrap!"
"I was trying to sound wise," I replied, "And people who seem wise are often fatalistic fools." [A/N: Fatalistic in the sense of Fate not Fatal. Fatal historically comes from Fate, as it's the one fate we all share.]
After another few moments of waiting in silence, with Naruto reading a book on Fuinjutsu (which I started him on a couple months ago), Sasuke reading a book on the dissembling of traps, and me reading a book on Iryo-Jutsu, Naruto asked, "Isn't a young toad called a tadpole?"
I blinked twice, "I think so."
After another hour of reading, I growled to myself, "Why did we have to get Hatake Kakashi for our Sensei?"
That got the attention of my two teammates.
"What do you mean?" Naruto asked, Sasuke looking on curiously, though trying to hide it.
"He's the only Jonin that would ever be late by more than a few minutes. I've heard he's late to anything less important than a B-rank mission. Which thankfully, seeing as how we're all High C-rank to low B-rank ninja, won't be all that much," I informed them, then after a few more minutes, I added, "He also has a legally implanted Sharingan, is an Elite-Jounin, a high A-rank ninja, and was a member of the previous Team Seven under the tutelage of Namikaze Minato-sama, the Yondaime Hokage."
My two brothers in all but blood (though I supposed Naruto was like a second-cousin or something) were openly gawking at me. Or Naruto was, Sasuke's eyes were wide open and his mouth slightly so. But to a full-blooded Uchiha, that was gawking.
After another hour of waiting, Naruto decided to set up a complex trap for Kakashi. Using seals and years of training his trapping skills.
This trap would make anyone under A-rank turn into Naruto's Sexy Jutsu form (Which made me thankful I chose the Blessing of the Mind Fortress, for it allowed me to not get a nosebleed from looking at it) except tailored for their genetics. So we'd be seeing a naked female Kakashi.
Damn, I'm not sure if the Blessing of the Mind Fortress will be enough to stem the nosebleed I'll get from that.
I half-heartedly attempted to stop Naruto but failed.
So, when five minutes later the door finally opened, we were all staring at a naked Hatake Kakashi. A naked male Hatake Kakashi.
Naruto and Sasuke immediately turned away, Naruto retching and Sasuke attempting to claw his eyes out.
My eyes went south and I saw it.
My nosebleed flung me across the room.
Before I fell into unconsciousness from blood loss, I noticed that Kakashi still somehow had his mask on.
.
.
.
A few minutes later I woke up, finding myself on the roof.
Naruto was hung upside down from one of the many trees on the school's roof.
It was Konoha, what did you expect? A cement roof?
Sasuke, as well as the upside down Naruto, still looked nauseous.
When I remembered why I was unconscious, I went bright red.
'Ugh, you'd think having had one of those for 16 years would've given me some resistance to it now that I swing both ways. Sadly, twelve years of not seeing any of them other than Naruto's in the bath has seemingly chipped away at my resistance.' I thought, 'Why couldn't I have just been born liking one gender?'
Grunting as I stood up, and pushing those thoughts to the back of my mind, I yawned, "So, introductions?"
The look Sensei gave me was even more deadpan and lazy looking than usual. At least from what I remembered.
"I guess I'll start," I continued, "I'm Tsuru, I specialize in Iryo-Jutsu, Fuinjutsu, and Taijutsu, with a sub-specialization in Ninjutsu."
Following my example, Naruto went next, "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, and I specialize in Ninjutsu, trapping, stealth, disguise, with a subspecialization in Taijutsu and Fuinjutsu."
And lastly Sasuke, "I'm Uchiha Sasuke, and I specialize in Ninjutsu with a sub-specialization in Taijutsu, Genjutsu, trapping, capture, and Shurikenjutsu. I'm also learning Kenjutsu."
He somehow managed to deadpan further. How he can express so much with a single eye, I will never know. Well, unless I learn how to do that.
"That isn't what I meant," I rose an eyebrow at him, "Fine. I'm Hatake Kakashi, I'm the type of person who doesn't like to talk about his likes and dislikes, my dreams for the future are none of your business, and I have a lot of hobbies."
Naruto and I rolled our eyes, Sasuke just gave him a deadpan look.
This time Naruto decided to go first, "I'm Uzumaki Naruto, I like Ramen, the color orange, my sister Tsuru-chan, and Iruka-sensei, especially when he comes to Tsuru-chan and I's apartment to make us some food! I don't like the three minutes it takes to make cup Ramen, people thinking a scroll in a kunai because it has a kunai in it," He got a weird look from Sasuke when he said this, "bigots, fat-fata-" Naruto struggled to get the word out.
"Fatalists," I inserted helpfully, getting a small smile from Naruto.
"Fatalists, and traitors. My dream is to become the strongest Shinobi so I can protect my precious people. So I'm gonna become the Jonin commander!"
I nearly choked on my own spit when he said this. While I had been confused about him not constantly shouting out his dream to become Hokage, I thought it was just that he had someone to acknowledge him. Now he wanted to become Jonin commander instead…
"Naruto-kun, you do realize that the strongest Shinobi is the Hokage, not Jonin Commander, right?" I asked, knowing that while he was smarter than he was back when Naruto was just a manga, he still wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed, and therefore might have overlooked that fact.
"But then you'll always be extremely respectful to me! Calling me Uzumaki-sama or something!" Naruto spat back, "Besides, Jiji is always doing paperwork. Who'd want to inherit that!"
"You have shadow clones," I pointed out, "You could just have them do it all for you," Sensei was gawking as if he'd never thought of doing that. Or maybe because he didn't know Naruto knew the jutsu, "Also, we're family and I've known you since we were infants. I'd never call you something you didn't want me to for anything other than a joke or mission." After a few seconds, I added, "And the Jonin commander probably has a lot of paperwork too."
Naruto pouted, "Why can't I be both? I mean, it would probably be a lot easier for me to become Hokage if I was the Jonin Commander."
I conceded. He had a good point.
"My hobbies include training, spending time with Tsuru and Sasuke-teme, pranking, and practical jokes."
Sasuke went next, "I'm Uchiha Sasuke, I like Tomatoes and my sister, Tsuru. I hate traitors, sycophants, dango, and the council. I don't have any dreams, more of an ambition. I will capture my brother and bring him back to Konohagakure so he can face justice for his crimes. I also wish to revive my clan. My hobbies include training and spending time with Tsuru and the dobe."
That was also rather shocking. He didn't want to kill Itachi, just capture him. And he hated traitors. Good. That's good. He's even less likely than I thought to join Orochimaru's Village Hidden in the Sound.
And finally, it was my turn.
"I'm Tsuru, sister to Naruto-kun and Sasuke-kun here, and my likes include training, my friends and family, Ramen, Iryo-Jutsu, healing, poisons, Fuinjutsu, Ninjutsu, Taijutsu, Chakra Control, and similar. My dislikes and hates include people who abandon their family or friends, perverts, people who abandon the village, people who hurt children, Nuke-nin, traitors, and lazy bums. My hobbies include training, spending time with my friends, spending time with my brothers, talking with Hokage-sama, studying, and reading. I really like reading. I think I'm understating this a little. I REALLY like reading. Oh, I also like writing. My dream? Well," I started, and gave a dramatic pause, shifting into a thinking pose, "Well, I don't really have one," Another dramatic pause, "A dream implies that it's uncertain. I will become a better seal master than Jiraiya-sama, I will become a better Iryo-nin than Tsunade-sama, I will become an S-Rank kunoichi that fights in the front lines, and I will help bring an era of peace among the Elemental Nations." My eyes burned with a fiery passion. If Kakashi doubted my loyalty to Konoha before for some reason, it was swiftly erased with this show of passion.
That didn't stop him from snorting at my ambition to bring an era of peace to the elemental nations.
That earned him a scowl. One that would put even Tsunade to shame. Not that he'd ever say that. He didn't want to be punched through a wall.
As it is, I read his thoughts and punched him in the head, knocking him headfirst into the floor.
'Strong.' He noticed, 'Probably stronger than Tsunade was at her age,' He'd rate her a 3 / 5, which was insane for a genin, and decent even for a Jonin. Heck, he's only a 3.5!
"Enough," Kakashi stated, toneless, as he stood up, acting as if nothing had happened. "I believed we each understand one another. Formal training begins tomorrow. Our first project involves only the members of this cell." Pause.
After a few seconds, Naruto got impatient, "What is it? What!"
"Survival Exercises." Dramatic pause. "You'll have to survive… against me. It won't be your typical practice, even by the reformed academy standards."
"Well, then what type of practice will it be?!" Naruto asked, annoyed at our Sensei's beating around the bush.
Sensei snorted.
"Sensei, please get to the point. I understand you find amusement in scaring young genins, but we won't be scared so easily. So, get to the point already, or I'll punch you through a couple trees tomorrow."
Paling slightly, though no one could see with his mask on, he continued, "In any case, we'll meet tomorrow on the practice field so that I can evaluate each of your skills and weaknesses. Bring all of your ninja tools and weapons. And don't have breakfast beforehand, unless you enjoy throwing up!" He then handed us each a paper, "The details of your assignment are on this handout. Memorize it. And don't be late!" Each of us sweat dropped at that, because seriously what a hypocrite!
He then left in a puff of smoke.
"Eat breakfast but be on time. He'll likely be watching us to see the team dynamic."
"But Tsuru-chan! He ordered us not to eat!" Naruto countered, but when I raised my eyebrow at him, he facepalmed, "He only suggested we did. But still, he said we'd throw up if w-"
"Who's the Iryo-nin here?" I asked, glaring at him until he backed up in submission.
"You are Tsuru-chan."
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Chapter Two End
第二章第二章
