Notes: Now that I know that "Iwatobi" is in Tottori prefecture, I know it would be around 6~7 hours to make a one-side (expensive!) trip from Tokyo by bullet train.

Fukuoka - one of the southernmost prefectures in Japan, favored for training camps during winter.


Foam of the Sea
Chapter 4

With the strange week he was having, Haruka had already lost track of what day it was. It wasn't that his life as a professional swimmer wasn't hectic, but he had a schedule he was used to and a team of people to remind him the day, time and any obligation he had aside for his training menu. And at the end of every long day, he had Makoto's warm smile to wait for, which he repaid with a warm meal and bath. Both of them enjoyed the lifestyle they had adapted.

"I'm sorry, I really don't feel I would be able to be a proper spokesperson for the LGBT community," Haruka tried to turned down the seventh person he was talking to since morning. He avoided saying he had no desire to be an activist of any sort – Makoto had told him to consider other people had strong feelings about those matters. The doorbell buzzed and while still trying to get rid of the person on the line, he switched on the intercom, getting a view of the young olive-haired woman who waited outside the building. "Haru-chan! Let me in!" she said and stuck out her tongue.

"Ran!" he let out in surprise and pressed the button to allow her into the building. He hurried to finish the phone call without being too rude.

"What are you doing here?" he asked after letting her inside the apartment.

"It's Friday?" She glanced at him as she stepped out of her high-heel shoes. He had slippers ready for her at the step of the genkan.

Friday... That meant the weekend was coming. He remembered he was supposed to spend the weekend in Fukuoka and Makoto had invited Ran to keep him company.

"I know, I know, it's cancelled, but since I'm free I thought I could keep Haru-chan company until my brother gets back." She smiled.

Haru narrowed his eyes. The phone was buzzing again, but he ignored it. "Did Makoto put you up for it?" he asked. "I'm fine, I really don't need babysitting."

"He didn't! I wanted to see Haru-chan; it's been a long time."

Haru sighed. "Fine. Do you want tea?"

"Yes please." She smiled at him again. The landline started ringing. Haruka was used to it and continued to the kitchen, but Ran looked confused and followed him. "You're not going to answer the phone?"

"No." He raised his mobile phone which was still buzzing with an incoming call. "This keeps me busy enough."

"You need a secretary," she said, amused. "What do they want from you? Juicy details about your long distance affair with Rin?"

"Actually just now I had a call from some organization; they want me to represent Japan in some international conference for homosexual athletes."

Ran stared at him for a moment in surprise, before bursting into a laugh.

"They want you to speak for them?" She asked between giggles and snorts.

"Yes." He shrugged. For a man of little words it was an amusing concept. "I told them I'm not good with speaking."

"Not that," she tried to control her laughter as she spoke. "You're so vanilla, you're practically a virgin!"

He made a face. "I was having sex when you were still having tea ceremonies with your dolls," he muttered, blushing.

"But you only had one partner right? Does it even really count as being gay?"

Haruka closed his mouth. It's true he had no experience with other men or women, but he didn't feel the need or desire to have that experience either. If being with Makoto defined him as gay, he had no problem with that. All he knew was that both of them had lucked out finding each other so early in life, or as Makoto's mom used to say, they've nurtured each other for the role.

"In a way, Ren is more fitting to represent the community," Ran added when Haru didn't reply.

Haru was surprised at the mention of the name. Ren was a sore spot for the Tachibana family. Growing in the shadow of his almost perfect brother and the energetic, strong minded twin sister, the sweet boy had become rebellious as a teen, and although his sexuality, just like his brother's, was accepted, he was the complete opposite from Makoto and Haruka and switched partners as often as his underwear. Talking to him seemed to achieve the opposite, and after barely graduating high school and failing the university entrance exam a few months before, Ren left for Tokyo and his family lost contact with him. Makoto had tried and failed to find him.

"You've been in touch with Ren?" Haru asked.

"No, I was just saying it because he's..." she begun stammering. "Anyway, that must be rough having people digging into your private life." The girl quickly switched the subject back to Haru.

He still eyed her and she took the mug of tea from his hands, taking a sip. They went back to sit in the living room.

"I'm going back to Iwatobi," Haru said once they settled on the couch. "Probably next week."

"Onii-chan told me." She turned the hot mug between her palms. "I don't know why you want to be miserable so much," she muttered under her breath.

"What's that supposed to mean?" He frowned at her. "Makoto will also return next year."

"You two can hardly be away from each other one day. Onii-chan was like a dog missing his owner every time you had to go abroad," she said, waving her hands. "And when onii-chan was away last year for work, you were also quite pathetic... You called me for every little thing!"

"Sorry," he muttered and scratched his head. Both he and Makoto were adults and had control over their life, but even though they weren't together 24/7, the need to be together and see each other every day hadn't diminished one bit with the years. He couldn't expect anyone else to understand their feelings.

Ran sipped the tea and looked around the spacious living room. "Onii-chan might get even lonelier in such a big apartment. It's a bit far from my university, but I'd love to upgrade from my crappy one room apartment..."

Haruka shook his head. "You're a student so you shouldn't be spoiled. We lived in a crappy one room apartment too when we just moved to Tokyo."

She sighed. "Onii-chan would've agreed."

"Unfortunately, Onii-chan is not here," Haruka said and rubbed his chin. Both of them knew that if she pressed a little more, he would've caved in - Haruka was always soft with the twins, sometimes even more than Makoto.

"So won't you tell me?" he asked when the phone got quiet again, raising his eyes to the girl.

"Tell you what?"

"Where's Ren."

"I don't know..." she said quietly.

"Yes you do."

"Okay, I do," she admitted, "but he made me promise not to tell anyone."

"Is he okay?" Haruka asked. Maybe instead of answering calls and turning down interviews, he could use the time and look for Ren. Makoto would be so happy to see his little brother again.

Ran shrugged. "He said he'll come back when he feels like it... He's really stubborn."

"What is he doing?" Haruka asked and hoped the boy wasn't selling his body to dirty old men.

"He's... Working..." Ran hesitated. "Uh, he's doing okay."

Haruka straightened. "Ran?"

"He's not doing something illegal…" She blushed.

"Ran?" He stressed her name.

She sighed. "I can't tell you the details, but he's working at a host club..."

"He's a host?" Haru asked in a low voice.

"Yeah, basically he's seducing women to buy expensive alcohol..."

Haruka started to put two and two together and furrowed his brow. "You shouldn't go to places like that, Ran. You're still a minor too." And it's such a dubious industry, he finished the sentence in his mind.

She blushed more furiously. "My friends made me... They wanted to see what it was like... And then I saw Ren there..."

"They're not supposed to hire him either," Haruka said sternly. "He's still not 20."

"Geez, Haru-chan is so strict... They hire a lot of guys who are between 18 and 20," Ran huffed. "And anyway, isn't it good I went there? Now I know where Ren is, and I know that he's fine."

"I want to see him," Haru said. "Give me the details."

Ran shook her head. "He asked me not to tell anyone, he made me promise not to tell onii-chan."

Haruka smiled lightly. "Then it's good I'm not him, isn't it?"

"What are you going to do?" Ran asked quietly. "I tried talking to him; he doesn't want to come back."

"I didn't get to talk to him." Haruka shrugged and put down his mug on the coffee table, before getting up and brushing his sweatpants. "I'll get changed and we'll go."

"Ehh?" Ran eyed him. "Go where?!"

"Ren's place."

"You can't be serious."

"We have plenty of time before Makoto gets back, it'd be better than watching me answer phone calls."

She tapped on her lips. "I don't know, I think the last one you answered was pretty amusing." She grinned at him.

Haruka changed into warm clothes really fast and was already halfway to the door before Ran could finish her green tea. She had no choice and quickly gulped down the last of the bitter drink, smoothed her skirt and followed Haruka to the door, retrieving their coats at the exit.


The elevator opened and Haruka immediately regretted his timing. "Either I don't see you at all for weeks or two days in a row, Nanase-san!" Tamura's smiling face greeted him.

Ran clutched Haruka's arm painfully. He looked at her, and realized she recognized the idol. She looked star struck. Come to think of it, Makoto mentioned she liked Tamura. There goes the surprise Makoto had planned for his sister.

"And who's this beautiful lady?" the idol asked once Haruka and Ran stepped into the elevator.

"That's Makoto's-" Haruka hesitated. He wanted to deceive Tamura a while longer, without resorting to lies.

"Can't be his girlfriend?! She looks so young!" Tamura didn't wait for him to finish.

"N-no, I'm just his sister," Ran said with a light blush.

Barely five floors down, the two were already acquainted. Ran possessed the same social ability as her older brother.

"Let me take you to Shinjuku, It's on my way," Tamura offered when they reached the ground floor. He pressed the button to keep the elevator's doors open and continued smiling at Haruka and Ran.

"We're fine, thank you," Haruka refused immediately.

Ran swatted his arm. "Oh come on, Haru-chan! You don't even know where the train station is!"

Haruka made a face and Ran smiled impishly and gave the final push. "Two words - Shinjuku station."

"I suppose we could use a ride," Haruka muttered. He really hated that huge and crowded station more than anything else in Tokyo.

Tamura smiled too and clicked to close the elevator doors, the elevator continued down to the parking level. Tamura led them to his slick black Mercedes-Benz.

Haruka considered sitting in the passenger's seat in the front, just so Tamura won't get ahead of himself and become too acquainted with Ran, but with the alternative being having to engage in a conversation with the young actor the entire way, sacrifices had to be made. 'Sorry, Ran,' he thought and sat in the backseat.

Ran's self-consciousness soon disappeared and she talked to Tamura as a friend - he even asked her to call him by his given name and all formalities were dropped after that.

Meanwhile in the backseat, Haru felt like a chaperon - escorting two kids on a date. He made sure the chat wasn't getting too intimate - Tamura wasn't someone he could entrust Ran to. And meanwhile he also researched his phone about host clubs. He only had vague knowledge from movies and from some jokes Nagisa made in the past, when they just moved to Tokyo. He wanted to know more before facing Ren.


"This should be it," Tamura finally said after pulling to a stop in a residential area of Shinjuku. It didn't take too long and the traffic was surprisingly not too heavy. Haruka mumbled his thanks to his neighbor and hurried Ran out of the car.

"Geez, Haru-chan! I was this close to getting his mobile user name!" Ran complained when the car sped away.

"Then we arrived just in time," Haruka said quietly and looked around. The quiet street only had moderately tall mansion type apartment buildings. He followed Ran to one of them. It was a regular old mansion built in the early 2000s. For some reason he expected Ren to live in a more fancy place. Although he was sure the location alone made the rent ridiculously high.

Ran buzzed the intercom and waited. After a moment passed with no reply, she buzzed again. "He's probably sleeping in. Nothing changed there," she said and tried again.

Haruka huffed. Just then, a neighbor walked outside, pushing the heavy door at the two. Haruka quickly grabbed the door and held it for Ran.

There was still no reply when Ran buzzed the doorbell.

"Maybe he's out?" she wondered.

Haruka shook his head and pressed the button several times impatiently.

After a few seconds of listening to the gritting ding dong sound distorted by Haruka's repeated clicking, the door opened widely.

"Ran! What do you think you're -" Ren abruptly stopped shouting as he stared at Haruka.

Haruka stared back at the young man before him. Since he couldn't make it for the twins' 18th birthday, it's been nearly two years since he had last seen Ren. The boy wasn't as tall as his brother, but he was slightly taller than Haruka now, perhaps Rin's height. He had changed his hairstyle and let it grow to his shoulders - even bleaching it a lighter brown color with orange tint. The straight short hair and bangs were replaced with a wild mane that covered most of his face. In short, if Haruka wasn't told the young man in front of him was Ren, he wouldn't have recognized him.

They studied each other for a moment. "Ha... Haru..." the boy stammered, surprised.

"Been a while, Ren," Haruka said quietly.

"Ran! I told you not to tell anyone where I am!" he yelled at his sister after a short moment.

"Well, you said not to tell onii-chan..." She pointed out with a wry smile.

Without waiting to be invited, Haruka pushed Ren aside and entered the apartment, taking off his shoes at the genkan, but not his coat. He threw a glance at the kitchenette in the narrow hallway. So Ren lived in a typical one-room apartment. It was identical to the one Haruka shared with Makoto when they moved to Tokyo for university, but he was still surprised.

"Hey, where do you think you're..." Ren was yelling behind him.

"Sorry to intrude..." Ran said politely and followed Haruka inside the room. She did leave her coat at the entrance.

Haruka stopped at the door. The one room was as narrow as he expected... the bed took most of the space and a closet, small table and an old flat tv provided all the furniture in the room. At least that's what Haruka detected between all the clothes that were thrown around in chaos.

"Geez, Ren... How can you live like this..." Ran muttered as she walked in, trying not to step on a pair of dirty underwear.

"I only come here to sleep and you've ruined that!" Ren growled back.

Haruka turned around towards the twins. "Ran," he addressed the girl and took out his wallet. "Go buy something for yourself, okay?" He handed her all the cash he had in his wallet and her eyes widened. Ren also stared in amazement.

"Is this... Is it really okay?" she asked quietly.

"Is it enough?" Haruka asked.

"Ahh, I think I can find a thing or two..." She smiled sheepishly and gave him a brief hug. "Thanks, Haru-chan! See you later, Ren!" She waved at the two of them and ran outside.

Haruka turned to Ren. "I take it the host business is not taking off?"

Ren blushed and moved a strand of hair from his face. "She even told you this much..." he muttered and continued, "Does Makoto also know?"

Haruka furrowed his brow at the mention of the name. When the twins were in middle school, Ren started calling Makoto in the more adult way- "nii-san" instead of "onii-chan" – which at the time bothered the older brother. But calling Makoto by name sounded like an attempt to distance him. Did Ren dislike his family that much?

"Makoto doesn't know," Haruka simply said. "I'm not going to tell him."

Ren huffed and looked away. "Then we're done here." He scratched his ribs and stifled a yawn, preparing to go back to bed.

Haruka stubbornly blocked his way. "I haven't started."

"Mind your own business!" Ren tried pushing him away, but Haruka planted himself firmly and didn't budge.

"You are my business." He folded his arms over his chest and looked intently at Ren. "You're important family."

Ren scoffed. "Last I recall Japan doesn't allow homos to get married. You'll never be my family," he said coldly.

Haruka ignored the insulting tone. "Marriage is just a piece of paper; you know I've been nothing less than an older brother to you since you were in diapers."

Ren made a face again and before he could make a comeback, they were interrupted by the ringing of Haruka's phone.

"That's..." Ren's voice faded.

"Sorry, I have to answer." Haruka apologized and took out his phone.

Makoto had made it a habit to call him every day during his lunch break and Haruka had made it a habit to receive the call. He made sure to always be near his phone at the designated time, or at the very least have someone remind him it was the time.

"Hey," he said quietly when he answered the call. Seeing Makoto's smiling face on the small screen always had an instant calming effect on his heart and mind.

In front of him, Ren made another displeased face. Haruka was sure he wanted to talk to Makoto yet couldn't bring himself to admit it. Haruka had been in those shoes before.

"How's your day?" Makoto asked, beating Haruka to it as usual.

"I'm good," he replied and scratched his cheek. "Ran stopped by and dragged me off somewhere. Now we found this stray cat..."

"Cat?" Makoto blinked.

"Yeah. It's a really stubborn stray cat. It wants to eat, but too afraid to approach my hand no matter how hungry it is."

Makoto let out a laugh. "Ah, don't worry, since it's Haru, I'm sure even that cat will fall in love with you in no time."

Haruka blushed. "Stupid... Uh, Anyway, I need to help Ran so I'll see you tonight."

"Un, okay. I love you," Makoto said and his silly happy face made Haruka feel so hot inside, he regretted not taking off the coat before.

"I know..." he muttered, but Makoto had already hung up.

Haruka shoved the phone back into his pocket and returned his attention to Ren, who looked even more sour than before.

"Are you ready to talk to me now?"

Ren groaned and run a hand in his hair. "There's nothing to talk about, just leave me alone. I have to work tonight."

Haruka closed the short distance between them. "I can't do that. Everyone is worried about you." He frowned. "You're not sick or anything, are you?"

"Huh, what? Of course not!" Ren grimaced.

Haruka sighed in relief. "Good, then it can't be worse than anything I've imagined."

"Right. As if someone like you could ever understand. Just go back home to your lovely wife... Or is it husband?"

Haruka ignored the dig again, but didn't drop the subject. "Someone like me?"

"Someone like you… who got everything they ever wanted..." Ren gritted his teeth.

He grabbed Haruka by his coat's lapels, pulling him closer. Haruka tensed. He didn't expect Ren to act aggressively, it reminded him how Rin had changed after returning from Australia... but what could be bothering Ren so much to a degree he would change beyond recognition? He couldn't finish processing his thoughts - Ren pushed him to the bed and straddled him, pinning him down.

"Wait.. What are you doing?! Ren!" Haruka raised his voice.

"Don't you ever wonder what it would be like to do it with someone else?" Ren asked with a dark gleam in his eyes and leaned in.

"No!" Haruka resorted to use force and pushed him away, sitting up.

Ren nearly fell off the bed, but balanced himself and sat up, looking at Haru intently. "You've never even once tried it with someone else? Not even a kiss?"

Haruka frowned. "I've never felt any need to..." He had never wondered about it either, he was perfectly satisfied with his love life – even before their relationship turned romantic or sexual, Makoto was everything he needed and everything he wanted - that was one thing that never changed through the stages of his life.

"Then how the hell do you think you'll be able to understand me?" Ren's voice trembled and for a brief moment Haruka saw the Ren he knew.

"You've never had to search everywhere... to keep looking and looking... to struggle to forget..."

The boy's shoulders sagged, but he didn't cry. He clutched his fists tightly until his knuckles turned white.

"Ren..." Haruka said softly and tried to touch the boy's shoulder, but withdrew his hand. "Are you perhaps... in love with me?" he asked carefully.

Ren raised his head in surprise and looked at him, pale as a ghost.

Haruka pressed his lips before continuing, his eyes a darker shade of blue. "No... It's Makoto, isn't it?"