Hello everyone! Terribly sorry about the late update! *chuckles* yeah, RL sorta caught up to me, and Uni slammed me with a few assignments. They're done now though, so YAY! More writing, hopefully. Anyways, Big thanks to Awen Sofer for their constant reviews! And thanks everyone else that reviewed all the chapters of Cloud's Life!
Anyways, I own nothing, and this chapter has repeated use of the words Ass-Hat. Disclaimer done.
(Chapter Starts yo)
Lightning flashed against the dark sky, briefly illuminating the clouds, and, should one be looking, reflecting of the light mist that was developing. It was to this that Cloud awoke, head pounding and wondering what he did to deserve it THIS time.
A groan from beside him alerted him to the presence of his former arch-nemesis, quite possibly recovering from the horrible beating that Tifa gave the two of them. Cloud chuckled. Really, it was really too much. First, he's forced by a certain, ungrateful flower girl to look after his newly revived ass hat of a former general, whose amnesia, now that he thought about it, really didn't make a whole bundle of sense. In fact, when he got the opportunity, he was going to grill Aerith until he got his answers.
Spikey, if you go near my girlfriend, I will personally sick Angeal on you.
On Second thought, a nice, polite chat about Sephiroth's current mental state seemed much more pleasant, and involved less maiming.
Damn Straight.
"Shut up Zack, just shut up." Cloud sighed.
"Cloud."
If it weren't for the girlish scream and falling out his bed, the cool façade that Cloud put up might have worked. Maybe.
(Sorry 'bout the wait yo, but the line breaks are back)
Sephiroth loved messing with Cloud's head. He fought to keep himself from smirking as Cloud awoke. Really, the bond could take Masamune and keep going (he had the scars to prove it too.), but a single measly punch from his childhood friend put's him down for hours? Damn, the whiney one must be able to hit hard.
A pulse in his head caused him to groan, forcing him to concentrate on keeping his eyes closed and breathing even. Apparently, Cloud was fooled enough to believe he was sleeping, causing Sephiroth to wonder how he lost THRICE to him! If he were a lesser man, hey may feel irked. But he was Sephiroth, the Nightmare, ShinRa's Poster General! So instead, he just felt like messing with Cloudybo's head for a while. Just until he figured out that revival didn't mean that he lost his memories, and that he was only doing the whole "penance" deal to get another life.
That and Zack though it would be hilarious if Cloud was faced with a non-psychotic Sephiroth.
Conveniently, Cloud mentioned his now deceased best friend/ saviour, and Sephiroth knew it was the time to put "Operation: Make Cloud Wet Himself" into action.
"Cloud."
The high pitched scream and falling out of his bed (covered in Moogle print sheets, of all things) was totally worth it. To the point that Sephiroth burst out laughing at his caretakers expense.
(….Reno, is this necessary?)
Cloud rubbed his sore backside and grumbled. The Demon of Clouds butt continued to laugh hysterically, eventually breaking down into giggles and hiccups. Cloud sighed. And then broke out laughing at the sight before him.
Really, a giggling Sephiroth sitting on a bright pink bedspread (probably Tifa's, the woman had a fetish for pink that she REALLY didn't show) was too much for Clouds WTF factor.
And thus, the Planet's Saviour and The Nightmare sat giggling like schoolgirls.
Somewhere in the lifestream, Aerith facepalmed, and Angeal burst into riotous laughter.
(Sorry 'bout Rude, he ain't good with line breaks yo)
After a good twenty minutes of giggling, both men sighed, and began staring at each other. Neither blinked for what felt like ages.
"I know you have all your memories." Cloud said.
Sephiroth was shocked. He was so careful! Perhaps there WAS a reason the Goddess chose Cloud as her defender. "Well done Cloud, it seems that you've figured it out rather quickly." Sephiroth returned with a smirk.
He really didn't anticipate what happened next.
"YOU BASTARD!" Cloud screamed, and lunged at Sephiroth, who only just realised that Cloud had called his bluff, and that he gave himself away.
(Line break again yo)
Tifa was furious. It was 3am, and Cloud was yelling, and SOMEONE screamed like a girl again. (She assumed the Shampoo model, he seemed like the type.)
Leaping out of bed, she stormed up to the room she dumped the two idiots in. and was greeted by a sight that made her inner fangirl squeal in delight.
Cloud and Sephiroth, both still in the pyjamas that Vincent had dressed them in (he was such a dear, despite looking like a vampire), with Cloud attempting to strangle Sephiroth with the (HER) pink sheets.
"Cloud, what ARE you doing?" she asked sweetly.
Too sweetly.
(Holy &^%^%! I get a line break! SHERA, GET THE CELEBRATION TEA!)
Cloud froze. The shadow of death itself loomed behind him, and called his name, preparing him for a hell which no man (he didn't count Sephiroth) had previously experienced.
"Cloud, why are you choking Sephiroth?"
He felt his nemeses, now weird sorta friend thing's, back shoot ramrod straight beneath his foot. He knew that Seph also knew. A look passed between both men. And thus both men began the logical way to defend themselves verbally, the only way the two knew how.
"HE STARTED IT!" came the synchronised reply.
No-one ever accused them of being geniuses when it came to women.
The hellish, nightmarish vision known as Tifa Lockheart smiled sweetly, sealing the men's doom.
"Cloud, Ass hat, Barret is coming back with the kids at 10 in the morning. SO, you had better go back to bed, or my fist will re-acquaint itself with your faces. UNDERSTOOD?"
A small "meep" of fear from both men signalled their agreeance. She smiled again, this time more genuine than evil, and left the room with a casual 'goodnight' thrown over her shoulder.
The two men let out a heavy sigh before Cloud returned to his bed. Sephiroth extracted the sheet from around his neck and slipped beneath it, and the two said their goodnights.
And finally, all was silent.
"Hey Seph?" Cloud asked.
"Yeah" came the reply.
"Did you notice how Tifa looked like Genesis at 3 in the morning?" Cloud giggled.
"You mean curlers and the facial mask?" Sephiroth giggled back.
"Yep" Cloud replied. Both men giggled yet again, and fist bumped each other goodnight.
For once, Cloud began to drift off, not cursing his life.
Until he remembered that Barret was going to be here tomorrow. And that meant something that Cloud despised with all his heart, loathed more than Sephiroth and Hojo and Jenova combined.
It meant dealing with a lovesick Tifa, and very, VERY randy Barret.
"Yep, my life sucks" he whimpered, before sleep finally claimed him.
(Story done yo. Time to get a latte)
Well guys, RnR is always appreciated, but hope you enjoyed yet another instalment of Cloud's Life. Also, the plot thickens slightly. WHAT NEW ADVENTURES WILL OUR PROTAGONISTS GET INTO? Review and send ideas, I'd like to know where you think I should go with this. Laters yo.
