FaF-Ch 4
For once, Brian had managed to restrain himself around Loren's candy jars, and Sully was thankful that he wouldn't have to explain to Dr Mike why he was bringing her son home with a stomachache and no appetite for his supper. He appreciated that she trusted him with the kids and he would never want to do anything to jeopardize that.
The boy's mild sugar rush had worn off about halfway back to the homestead, and he was now dozing comfortably as Sully carried him on his back. It was a truly pretty day, and despite Brian's weight and his sore muscles he wasn't in any hurry, though he knew Dr Mike would be starting supper soon (under Colleen's supervision, of course). A thought came to him, and he grinned as he veered off the path and headed deeper into the woods.
A short time later, Sully reached his lean-to above the homestead; in addition to Brian on his back, he was also carrying two good-sized rabbits tied to his belt. He'd gotten quite lucky with his traps (and that Brian had stayed asleep while he recovered the game) and his mouth was watering at the thought of some hearty stew. Shifting the small boy's weight a little and trying to ignore the nagging ache in his lower back, he carefully started down the hill. As he drew closer to the house, he saw Matthew in the yard doing what appeared to be an awkward sort of waltz with an invisible partner, and a puzzled smile crept across his face.
He was startled when Brian yawned in his ear. "Sully? We home yet?"
He chuckled softly. "Yeah Bri, we're home." Kneeling so the boy could climb off his back, he untied the rabbits and handed them over. "Here, run these down to yer ma for supper."
Brian's sleepy eyes went wide. "Wow! Thanks Sully! We're sure gonna eat good tonight!" He slung them over his shoulder and they flopped against his back as he half skipped half ran the rest of the way down the hill; Sully couldn't help but grin at his excitement and energy. He flew past a startled Matthew and was in the house by the time Sully reached the yard. "Brian!" the young man scolded.
"Ah, don't blame him, he's just excited about the rabbits I got for supper." Matthew turned and smiled when he saw Sully; he offered his hand and the older man shook it, wincing slightly at the soreness in his shoulder. "Whatcha doin out here?"
Matthew's cheeks turned pink and he fidgeted self-consciously. "Just, uh, jus' fetchin some water for Dr Mike." He gestured to the bucket by the clothesline.
"Oh, is 'at all?" Sully teased. When he could, he always tried to treat Matthew as grown up; he was young, but mature for his age and responsible, and they had a good relationship. Sully was glad he'd stepped into his role as "man of the house," watching over the family when he couldn't.
Matthew grinned sheepishly, knowing he was caught, and quickly changed the subject. "Thanks for the rabbits, I ain't had a chance ta go fishin lately." With a smirk he added, "Hope Colleen's the one who gets 'em in the pot, 'cause the last time Dr Mike tried makin stew..." He rolled his eyes and they shared a laugh. It never failed to amaze Sully how the good doctor could be so skilled with her hands in the clinic but all thumbs in the kitchen. Not that he minded; on the contrary, it made her all the more endearing to him. The little furrow between her brows as she fretted over a recipe, that sad pout as she pulled yet another pan of burned biscuits out of the oven, it was so charming how hard she tried, and he would gladly eat buckets of stew no matter how bad it was just to make her happy.
Light laughter floated through the window, bringing Sully back to the present. "C'mon, let's go inside and get those rabbits cleaned up. Here, I'll get the water." He picked up the bucket, not expecting it to be already full, and sucked in a painful breath.
"You ok? What's wrong?" Matthew was immediately concerned.
"Ah, 's nothin." Sully rolled his shoulders, trying to ease the soreness. "Fell off a horse earlier." He twisted from side to side a little, rubbing at his lower back. "Didn't help that I carried yer brother halfway home."
Matthew chuckled knowingly, having done his share of hauling Brian around. "You should let Dr Mike have a look. She's probably got a salve or something she could put on it for ya."
Sully quickly shook his head, chasing away the all too pleasant thoughts of the doctor's delicate hands massaging his body. He felt his cheeks grow warm and hoped Matthew wouldn't notice. "Nah, it ain't that bad. Wouldn't say no ta some willow bark tea though." He smiled and moved to go in the house but Matthew stopped him.
"Wait," he blurted, then lowered his voice. "Pa's here."
Sully's stomach churned and he swallowed hard. "'S 'at right?"
"Been here all stinkin day." Matthew kicked at the dirt. "Braggin about his ship, how rich he's gonna be, actin like he knows so much, teachin Colleen how ta dance—it ain't right!" He raised his voice angrily at the last and Sully quickly shushed him, grasping his arm and pulling him away from the window.
"Shh, now, you don't want Brian and Colleen hearin ya talk that way, do ya? It'll just upset 'em." Sully led him into the barn and waited for him to settle down a little; the teenager could have quite a temper. "I know ya don't like havin Ethan here, I know you're upset with him for leavin-"
"I hate him," Matthew growled through gritted teeth.
"But he is your pa, and ya can't blame him for wantin ta see ya." Sully sighed, hardly believing he'd spoken in defense of the man. He knew how it felt though, a father missing his kids...
Matthew huffed skeptically. "If he wanted ta see us so bad, why'd he leave us in the first place? He only came back 'cause he heard about Ma dyin. But he didn't care about us when she was alive, so why should he care now?" He clenched his fists, his face taut, eyes blazing; Sully didn't think he'd ever seen the young man so angry. Evidently Ethan's return had stirred up some long-buried feelings of resentment. "He gave up on us, on our family, a long time ago. Ma asked Dr Mike ta take care of us, not him. We don't need him around, lyin and pretendin everything's ok. Actin like he's a good pa." He spat the word out bitterly. "I don't trust him and I don't want him anywhere near my brother and sister."
"I understand." Sully nodded. "How do they feel about Ethan bein back?"
Matthew rolled his eyes. "Pfft, I can't believe how excited they are." He pulled a piece of hay from a bale and anxiously drew it through his fingers. "Colleen was always 'Pa's princess,' he never did no wrong in her eyes," he sneered. "And Brian was wee little when he took off, he never really knew 'im. They were both so young, they never really understood. Never saw how bad it got for our ma. I was the only one..." His voice broke, remembering, and Sully could tell he was fighting back tears. He sniffled and then cleared his throat, composing himself. "I ain't gonna let him hurt us like that again," he vowed. "And I sure ain't lettin him take us anywhere."
"What?" Sully choked. Anxiety gripped his heart like a fist. "Wh-where would he take ya?"
Matthew shrugged, flinging the small piece of straw away. "He keeps talkin about San Francisco."
Sully was at a loss. Part of him was furious, wanted to storm into the house and confront Ethan, threaten him, but he knew that would just make matters worse. And anyway it wasn't his fight, the Coopers weren't his kids, he had no real say in their lives. But the thought of them leaving, of never seeing them again, made him ache deep inside, a dull sick pain he hadn't felt for some months... "Dr Mike would never let that happen," he stated firmly, as much for himself as for Matthew. "She made a promise to Charlotte that she would look after ya, and I know she won't break her word." He smiled briefly, thinking of the lovely doctor's integrity and selflessness and strength. Courage of a warrior. "Especially when it comes ta Ethan. I'm sure your ma told Dr Mike all about him, what he did, and she knows you all are better off right here with her. That man ain't fit ta be takin care a' you."
He hadn't meant to say the last part out loud; as much as he disliked Ethan, he knew it wasn't right to criticize him in front of his son. Meeting Matthew's gaze, he started to apologize, but the young man held up his hand. "No, you're right. He ain't fit to raise us, he never was. He ain't any kind of pa to us at all." His eyes shone with respect as he added, "But you are, Sully."
The mountain man felt like he'd had the wind knocked out of him. Speechless, he could only stare as Matthew went on. "You have been a better pa to us over the years, especially these past months, than Ethan was our entire lives." His voice grew strained with emotion. "I know you did what you could ta help Ma take care of us, even though she was too proud ta take yer money." He chuckled sadly. "But it was more than that. You were the one who taught me how to hunt, who took me and Brian fishin. You told us stories and taught us stuff, about nature, about right and wrong. You were there to protect Ma and Colleen, and you showed us how women should be treated, with kindness and respect. You are the one who taught me how to be a man, Sully. A good man, just like you."
Sully was overwhelmed by Matthew's words. He had no idea that he'd had such a strong influence; tears stung his eyes and a lump rose in his throat as the young man continued. "And now you're helpin Dr Mike, bringin food and watchin out for us, and Brian's gonna grow up learnin from ya, and he'll be a good man too. He really looks up to ya, y'know." He suddenly grinned. "You 'member when we first came here ta stay with Dr Mike, and he ran away 'cause he wanted ta live with you and the Cheyenne? And then you climbed down into that ravine and rescued him? We had ta hear that story for weeks! Sully the hero!" Matthew laughed, recalling his brother's tale of adventure, and how his broken leg had, in the boy's mind, only added to the excitement. But then he grew serious. "Pa never woulda done that," he added darkly.
A smile had curled Sully's lips as well at the memory of that day, though he wasn't so much thinking of Brian as he was reliving the night before the search, in the teepee with Dr Mike...but his eyes widened in shock at Matthew's last statement. "What? 'Course he woulda," he insisted. As sleazy as Ethan was, he would surely come to the aid of his children if they were in trouble—wouldn't he?
Matthew shook his head. "No he wouldn't. He'd a' gone back ta town for help, and then prob'ly paid somebody else ta go down after Brian. He'd never a' done it himself." He regarded Sully with curiosity. "You though, ya didn't even hesitate. Jus' went right down there and got 'im."
Sully nodded. "'Course I did." It hadn't occurred to him to respond in any other way in that situation; someone needed help and he could provide it, so he did. That was just his nature, his instinct. He hadn't even thought of waiting for help from the Cheyenne or the other search party. He'd simply seen that Brian was in trouble, known that he could get to him and bring him to safety, and done so.
"But why? Why'd ya do it?"
Sully cocked an eyebrow at Matthew, not sure what he was asking. It was a strange question, with pretty simple answers: why did he rescue Brian? Because the boy was in danger, because he was able to, because Dr Mike had asked for his help...but he sensed the young man was seeking a deeper reason. And the truth was in his heart, though it was hard for him to admit. He took a deep breath and squared his shoulders. "'Cause...'cause Brian's"-like a son ta me?--"special ta me. You all are. There's nothin I wouldn't do for any of ya. And as much as you think I've taught you, you guys have taught me stuff too. About myself, and what's important in life. If I'm a good man, it's 'cause a' you all."
The satisfied smile on Matthew's face indicated he'd gotten the answer he needed. He held out his hand, and when Sully took it he pulled him into a quick manly hug. Sully tried not to wince at the heartfelt embrace, but when Matthew lightly thumped his back he couldn't help the small grunt of pain that escaped his lips.
Matthew quickly stepped back, looking guilty. "Sorry."
"'S alright." Sully waved him off with a slightly tense smile. "Like I said, some willow bark tea and I'll be right as rain. I've got some up in my lean-to."
"Dr Mike would fix ya some," Matthew suggested, a lilt in his voice that seemed to hint at something. "I'm sure she'd want ya ta stay for dinner, seein as how you brought it and all."
Sully sighed. As much as he'd been looking forward to the stew (and the company), the thought of sharing a meal with Ethan Cooper made him lose his appetite. "Not tonight, sorry."
"Ya sure? She's gonna be disappointed."
So am I. Sully could imagine the look in those unique eyes of hers. He hated letting her down. "I'll make it up to her—to all of you. Soon, alright?"
"Alright." Matthew nodded in understanding. He pushed the barn door open and they stepped out into the yard. Picking up the neglected water bucket, he sighed heavily, dreading going back inside. "See ya later."
"See ya Matthew." Sully watched him climb the porch stairs and enter the homestead, then turned and ambled up the hill to his little refuge. His pain had lessened somewhat, but he knew it would still be a restless night; the eldest Cooper sibling had given him a lot to think about.
