Chapter 4: To Forgive
She had been sitting by the window for hours, pink-haired daughter asleep in her arms, staring at nothing, alone as she rarely was. Endymion slowly entered the room, his boots ringing on the marble, cape whispering along the smooth surface. He stopped just behind his wife and daughter, reaching out to place a hand on Serenity's shoulder. "My love? What's wrong?"
"I'm just thinking, Endymion. Chibiusa came in here to cheer me up and fell asleep." Her voice cracked, and suddenly she was Usagi again, the young girl who wanted nothing more than to make everyone around her happy. "I don't know what's the matter with me, Mamo-chan. I've never felt so melancholy . . . it's like a part of me is missing. I have felt a little like this since Haruka-san and Michiru-san vanished, but never to this extent. Maybe it's because Minako-chan hasn't been out of her room in so long . . . three months, at least. Ailan and Setsuna have been here for weeks, Mako-chan and Ami-chan have been moping around their wing of the castle since they returned, and there hasn't been a Council meeting in five long months. My kingdom is falling apart, and I don't know what's wrong."
"That's not all, Usako. That's not all that's bothering you." Endymion reached down and took Chibiusa, carrying the tiny pink-haired bundle toward her bedroom, Serenity following him. After the girl was tucked in for her nap and her flock of ladies-in-waiting was attending on her, Endymion led his wife to their bedroom, closing the silver- and gold-engraved doors and stopping in front of the glass doors that led to their balcony, pulling the silky white drapes closed. Serenity watched him silently, hands clasped sedately in front of her, silky white dress pooling on the soft carpet.
"What do you think the problem is, Endymion?"
"Usako, the problem isn't Minako, Ailan, Setsuna, Makoto, or Ami. It's Rei."
Serenity straightened, blue eyes hard and cold. "What about her?"
Endymion sensed the change in his wife's mood, and he turned, stormy blue eyes sad. "Usako, you know what I mean. For more than seven hundred years Rei has been your best friend, always by your side, closer than sisters, supporting you through everything, especially during your pregnancy with Chibiusa when you weren't really sure what to do. She knew. She would never hurt you, she has been Chibiusa's greatest protector, even more so than the Asteroid Senshi who seem to have adopted the girl as their charge, and I still can't understand why she did what she did. And, deep down, neither can you."
"I don't need to understand, Endymion. She killed hundreds of people without thinking, her heart cold after so many years of fighting. I can not endanger my people by letting her stay. No matter what I want, she cannot stay."
Endymion crossed his arms over his chest. "I don't believe you. What's really on your mind, Usako? Please don't lie to me."
Serenity sighed and sat on the edge of her bed, folding her hands calmly in her lap as her husband joined her on the white satin sheets. "I just . . . Mamo-chan, you remember how Rei-chan and I were when we all first met. We were always at each other's throats but she protected me in battle when I wasn't strong enough or fast enough . . ."
"And you protected her, too. There was one time in particular when you jumped in front of a wounded Mars to protect her from poisoned spikes she could never hope to avoid."
"I almost died, Mamo-chan, but to this day I would have done no less. Mamo-chan, she is my sister, and I love her so much, but I just sat in judgment over her and watched her cry and listened to her plead and ignored her! I exiled her without a second thought and now part of my soul is gone, my sister is as good as dead—may well be dead—and I don't know how to make it better! I miss her and I can't let her come back!" Usagi burst into tears, falling into Mamoru's arms, letting him sooth her until she ran out of tears.
"I know, Usako. And now your Senshi team is shattered, the group that has survived for so many hundreds of years is falling apart, and even Haruka-san and Michiru-san are no longer here for you to lean on. I wish I could help you, Usako, but until you forgive Rei and rebuild your Senshi team, nothing will help."
"I can't let her back . . ."
"Forgive her, Usako, in your heart and in truth. She loves you like a sister and you owe her that much. Once you open your heart again, you can bring Minako out of her shell, Ami and Makoto will return to your side, your mothers will fall in behind them, and the Council of the Star Senshi will resume normal operations. Exiling Rei did nothing but fracture the court, and now you must complete the process and heal the fractures."
"I can't, Mamo-chan. I don't know where to start."
"Well, I hear that there's a fortune-teller in Akaneyama who has become very well-known in just a few weeks. People travel from all over our kingdom to hear her speak, to learn her prayers, to receive her blessing. We should try to arrange for all of the Senshi to go to her. She might be able to help."
"I'll talk to Minako."
Chieko and Chiyoko held their staffs in defensive positions, dark blue eyes locked with purple gray, neither moving. Suddenly, they moved, attacking and parrying so fast that their sisters couldn't keep up. Matsurika tossed a ball across the room to Rikuriko, four pairs of eyes watching as the youngest Hino-Aino daughters easily avoided the ball, never faltering in their match, so perfectly trained that neither could be hit. Rikuriko tossed the fist-sized ball to Mika, adding another as Mika passed both to Koyama. Soon, a dozen balls were flying across the room, narrowly missing the pair of combatants, drawing their mother's attention. Minako slowly stood, taking a pair of short sticks, holding them both behind her back as she approached the group.
A second later, without a warning, a blur of gold motion knocked all of the balls into the cushions of the couch, separating the combatants and forcing them to fight even more fiercely. Chieko fell back first, landing on the carpet at Koyama's feet, staff falling against the wall on the other side of the room. A flash of black and gold in the center of the room turned into a blur, both women moving so fast that the others were shocked. Moments later, it was all over, Chiyoko sprawled on the floor at her mother's booted feet, Minako standing with one short staff touching her daughter's neck and the other held crossed behind her back. She was glowing gold, her eyes fierce twin stars, all of her senshi power flowing around and through her, dress having changed to her fuku.
"Mother?"
Minako suddenly relaxed, power fading, tossing her staffs across the room. "Sorry, Mika. I'm alright. Chieko, Chiyoko?"
"We're fine," the girls replied, standing. "What got into you?"
"I'm not sure, Chiyoko. I used to fight all the time. Until recently, Rei and I would spar on a regular basis, to keep our skills sharp. I could never beat her. Everything you know, you learned from her, you inherited from her." Sighing, Eternal Sailor Venus turned, letting her transformation fade as she headed back to her window.
"Don't go just yet." Minako's daughters squealed in delight as a very familiar purple-haired Senshi entered the room, her emerald-eyed wife just behind her. Hibana, Asakaze, Kumiko, Aya, Yuki, and Setsuko followed Hotaru and fire-haired Shioko into the room, everyone pulling back as the youngest of the Planet Senshi faced the leader of the Inner Senshi. "Why are you hiding in here?"
"There's nothing for me out there."
"That's a feeble excuse. You're afraid of what your fellow senshi will think of you for exiling your wife."
"That's not true! I just have no reason to go out there!"
"Minako-chan, you miss Rei. There's no denying it. You love her with all your heart, she is your soul mate and the mother of your children, and you pushed her away without a second thought the instant she made a mistake. You never let her explain herself!"
"There was no excuse! She almost destroyed all of Crystal Tokyo in her arrogance! There is no forgiveness!" Minako's fists were clenched by her sides, tears in her eyes, her rage and self-hatred forming a dark golden cloud around her slender form.
"I almost destroyed the whole world! Twice! By choice! And as Mistress Nine I almost destroyed this entire galaxy! Do you hate me?"
"No!"
"Then why do you hate her? Do you think she did it on purpose?"
"That's not the point! She killed all those people for nothing! You were trying to save everyone when you almost destroyed everything!"
"How do you know she didn't have a reason?!"
"What reason could she have had?!"
"The same one we all had! Saving the world! Did you even ask her? Did you give her a chance to explain anything?!"
Minako shook her head, falling to her knees, unable to speak through the sobs. Mika fell down beside her mother and held her, sad eyes turned up to Hotaru. "You didn't have to be so cruel."
"In the past I would have agreed with you, Mika, but I don't know what has happened to the Senshi. I can't stand by and let Rei's mistake destroy this kingdom. Minako, you must follow me out of this room and learn to forgive. You want to forgive her, I know you love her, and even if you never see her again you don't want her to die thinking you hate her." Hotaru held out her hand.
Minako slowly reached up and took the younger Senshi's hand, letting Hotaru draw her to her feet. "I don't want to never see her again," she whispered.
"I know."
Jupiter and Mercury sat beside each other at the Senshi table, a chair between them and Minako, another one between them and Hotaru on the other side. Setsuna and Ailan flanked their daughter, the small group staring at each other, waiting for someone to begin. Serenity cleared her throat, catching everyone's attention.
"I suppose I should start. We all know why we're here. Eight months ago, one of us did the unthinkable, killed hundreds of our citizens, but we, in our rage, never asked her what really happened. We don't even know if she's alive or dead."
"She's not dead," Minako whispered, head hung. "I would know if she was dead."
"But we cannot find her. She was the one who could see other things, other people. We can't find her without that power."
"We won't give up, just because of that," Ami whispered. "We will search the entire Solar System logically, and we will find her."
"Then we will bring her here and ask her what really happened. And maybe we can let her come back. Maybe she had a reason."
Setsuna smiled and glanced at her wife. Finally the younger Senshi were being sensible.
"She . . . she might not come back, Mako-chan. What if she blames herself so much that she doesn't feel that she can be a Senshi? What if she truly was at fault?"
Usagi reached across the table and covered Minako's hand with hers. "Maybe I was wrong, Minako-chan. What have we become? I exiled my best friend, my loyal senshi, and I don't care what happened. When we find her, I will invite her back."
