Chapter 4: Lectured
Considering the conversation I had had with Lucifer in the elevator, and how I had spilled my guts to the smug bastard whether I wanted to or not, I shouldn't have been surprised that I dreamed of her….of Eliza. Of how we'd first met, officially anyway. I think I might have seen her a couple of times before she had sat down at the bar in that club I used to work at, but it was always in the middle of a crowd, one time at a cosplay party at a New York comic-con event. Yes, say it, I'm a nerd, bite me. We've established this already. Another time I think I saw her at one of my favorite shops.
Perhaps she had been there because she knew that I liked it? She had known more about me than what would have been possible for an acquaintance. Perhaps she had planned to ask me out or something? Perhaps, I didn't know there were a thousand possibilities and I had no way of knowing which were the right ones? Whatever the case, shy as she was, my emerald eyed goddess sat down at the bar one insignificant night, and we began to talk. It was a slow night, so beyond a few other customers that were there more to pass the time then get knock down drunk, I was free to do as I liked so long as I kept the drinks coming as the need required, so I had the time to indulge her quiet curiosity over the thumping music in the background.
"Didn't I see you somewhere before?" I remember her asking, before recognition dawned in her emerald eyes that even then, captivated me to no end. "Oh, I think I remember. You were dressed as Zoe Washburne, Firefly right?" She asked, and giggled sweetly when my cheeks turned beet red at the reminder. "Don't be embarrassed, it was a good outfit. It seemed rather fitting for you. Your skin tone alone made you stand out as a better Zoe than most I've come across in the cosplay circuit."
…..Yes, I'm a Browncoat on top of being a nerd. Now get over it. As for my skin tone these days, I'd be lucky to pull off a good River Tam.
Despite her reassurance, I couldn't immediately stop blushing as I coughed uncomfortably in response. "Could we not mention the fact I'm a total geek?"
"Why? I think it's endearing that you're not afraid to show your loyalties so proudly. Zoe is quite the powerful, strong woman from what I understand, yet she's so mismatched with that incorrigible if funny husband of hers." Eliza replied and tapped a finger against her lips as her mind wandered.
My blue eyes had probably glowed in delight at finally having found someone who I could talk with about Firefly, despite my initial embarrassment. Seriously, most people thought that I liked the series a little too much, but Eliza? She loved it just as much as I did and still do. Unable to help myself, I leaned on the counter and grinned, embarrassment forgotten now that I had found a fellow nerd, at least in spirit since in my mind, she was far too pretty to be labeled in such a crude fashion. "And what makes you say Wash is not good enough for Zoe?" I challenged good naturedly, and Eliza giggled again in response.
"Yes, he might be a leaf on the wind and all since he's a most gifted pilot, but she could kill him with her pinky if she had half a mind." Eliza retorted and held my gaze, neither one of us willing to back down. "Of course, maybe that's the point? Some people are attracted to dangerous people." Oh if only I had taken the hint she had left at my feet. Dangerous people indeed.
"I think it doesn't matter if she could easily kill him, only that they loved each other." I argued back. "Call me a hopeless romantic, but that's how I think."
"Hopeless romantic." She said with a quirk of her lips. "It helped he made her laugh I imagine."
It was too easy. "Curse you and your inevitable betrayal!" We were soon lost in a fit of giggles that had us bent over for several seconds before we regained our composure. I remember noting her cold, soft skin against my own as I grasped her offered hand, but I didn't think anything of it at the time. "Alex."
"Eliza. It's nice to meet you, officially at least." She replied, and offered me a warm smile even as her green, luminescent eyes kept me staring as if hypnotized. Not a far stretch given she was a Toreador and all, even if mental domination isn't a part of our repertoire, at least not naturally anyway. "So, what other things do we have in common I wonder, beyond our love for Firefly and its follow up movie, Serenity?"
"I'm sure we can find a few things." I replied, managing to look away at last, and made it a point to start cleaning up for the night although there was still another two hours on my shift. Anything to keep me from staring and driving her away by being a drooling idiot. That was my thought at the time anyway, but Eliza didn't seem to mind.
She waited patiently for me to finish up and graced me with a shy smile when I was ready to go. "You had something in mind?" She asked and cocked her head. "To get to know each other." She clarified, realizing how that had probably sounded and was quick to backpedal on the off chance she had offended me. Far from it, but it was still cute.
I blushed but chuckled as I nodded. "I'm just glad I didn't scare you off yet. Most people thought my nerdy induced habits were downright weird back home." Unfortunately that's not an exaggeration in my case, but even then, I was doing what I could do to survive an overbearing mother and the whole thing with my dad passing away. When he was still alive things had been bearable, afterwards though, it had been like I was alone. The last person who had truly cared about me was gone, and I was lost to fire and brimstone mom 101. So can anyone blame me for going full on nerd mode?
Eliza seemed to understand though, and gave me a look that at the time I thought was strange since it seemed oddly sympathetic, more so than should have been possible for having only just met each other. She understood, in her own way, exactly the kind of pain I had endured, but I didn't know why, and I hadn't asked. Not that I would have believed her until she bit me of course, but that comes later. "It would take a lot more than that to scare me away Alex." Was all she said at the time, before perking up just as quickly. "Besides, what's so wrong with being a nerd exactly? Normal's overrated."
"Huh, and we just found another thing we have in common. We think being normal is boring." We shared another giggle as I collected my coat and bag from the doorman on our way out of the club, before having to wait for Eliza to do the same. Afterwards we were on our way, where exactly I didn't know, but I wasn't about to argue either. I had just found my nerdy soul mate as far as I was concerned, and it helped she was quite easy on the eyes.
I was giddy with happiness, after a long stroke of bad luck in the big bad city I could finally see the light, or so I thought. I had actually looked into the abyss without realising it, but at least this particular abyss didn't make me want to look away. But that was the point wasn't it? Vampires are predators, and Toreadors are the prettiest, the most gorgeous of the bunch, so it's no surprise I was stupidly following one around like a lost puppy. Even now that I know what would happen, I cannot say that I wouldn't have gone with her. Despite all that has happened since then, she made me truly happy during the time we shared with each other. Still, I wish she could have lived to give me the answers I sought myself.
Now that I think about it, I haven't actually given you a very clear picture of her have I? Other than an eye color and the fact she's pale as any Toreador vampire, I mean. Funny thing is, those are some of the only features I can ever recall with any clarity without racking my brain for the rest, but it is there, and I certainly saw enough of her body to know every curve and angle, it's just locked behind a fog for some reason. Maybe I suffered a bit of amnesia, like that girl from Santa Monica is rumored to have suffered, when Eliza bit and Embraced me? Meh, who knows, but I do remember, that's all that matters, it just takes me time to recall the details for some reason. Part of it might have been her Presence, or a number of things that make it hard for me to remember more on demand, who knows. I imagine waking up in the morgue didn't help with my memory.
Whatever the case, Eliza was beautiful as any Toreador, but that should be obvious by now. The problem with this amnesia was that it also made me feel like I forgot something important, not to the world or anything but to me. Maybe some kind of goodbye from her? Something to remember her by? I didn't know what was eating at me whenever I thought about it. Hence I tried to avoid thinking about it. Sorry, getting distracted again. Emerald eyes, pale skin, focus Alex. Midnight black hair, a little smaller then me, lithe, graceful and despite being undead, full of life. Despite her inherent shyness, she was passionate, outgoing when she was in an environment she was comfortable in, and since we had so much in common, it wasn't hard to get her to open up. Those are the details that I can recall, along with the fact that she was an amazing kisser.
Although that makes me wonder why I don't recall the feeling of her cool body against mine. I mean Kindred are simply put, cold. Same temperature as everything around us, but I cannot remember ever feeling that when I was with her, at least not to the point it was uncomfortable or unnatural anyway. Instead I felt a warmth that should not have existed, or was I simply so smitten by her that I didn't care? Or, and here's a thought that should scare anyone a little, did she ensure she was warm by feeding before she came to me? Because if she had the foresight to take that step, to ensure her cover was so intact, then what else was premeditated? I want to believe it was the former, that I simply didn't care and that she had felt something close as to how I had felt for her, but I will never know for certain. I only have what others have said about her to go on, and not everyone had a positive outlook regarding Eliza of the Toreador clan.
I don't know, but what I do know is that those first few days had us meeting at the club, before we'd head to the movies, any anime or comic cons that were in town, which she was always able to afford despite my offers to pay for some of the fee to get in the door, or we'd just sit in her home and watch movies all night until I fell asleep on her couch. I never asked why she never ate anything, why she never drank anything, although I did remember finding it weird, I was just too wrapped up in her presence to care, literally and otherwise. I might have been utterly smitten with her, but I wasn't blind….not completely anyway.
It was the middle of May, we'd been going out for almost three weeks, when I finally got up the courage to take things further. It started out as any other night, except we had gone to my hovel of a home in the city for a change, although not because I had wanted to. She had insisted on seeing my place though, and she knew just how to persuade me to get what she wanted. Not that she had to do a lot of persuading, but I was still embarrassed since my place was nothing to look at by any means.
I did mention the hole in the wall right? The one that ensures that the cold continue to dominate the clime in what some would consider an apartment, not me but perhaps others. I think more of it was some kind of hovel that was I forced to live in by sheer desperation. She didn't seem to care though, although I imagine, now at least, that Eliza had done her share of sewer running, going through abandoned, haunted houses, and who knew what else, so my place probably wasn't so bad in comparison. And yes, there really are haunted houses out there. If vampires are real, why not ghosts? And just so you know, some of them are really rude, you round a corner and get a vase in your face for your troubles. And that more than once, kitchen utensils… those tend to hit you too. But we'll get to my own misadventure in a haunted house, or rather a haunted hospital, later.
Needless to say, I was embarrassed as all Hell, but when I saw Eliza and her nod of approval, I remember letting out a massive sigh in relief that she found cute, much to my chagrin. She merely pulled me into her chest and kissed the top of my head as she had a tendency to do. "Don't be ashamed," she whispered into the top of my head, "it's not that bad. Trust me, I've seen far worse."
"I doubt it." I muttered morosely.
"I wasn't always so well off you know." She was quick to point out.
"Still, my apartment looks like it's about to collapse. Where were you that could have been worse? A war zone?" I asked, and pulled away so that we were at arm's length from each other yet still close enough to be comfortably in the other's grasp.
She giggled sadly and shook her head, but if I had known the truth, I wouldn't have been so flippant about it. "No, nothing like that, but everyone who isn't prepared for the city tends to end up in the same place at some point."
"The graveyard?" I asked, surprised and more than a little bit disturbed. "You had to live in the graveyard?" Let me clear this up right now if last chapter wasn't apparent enough for you, we don't need coffins. That's a myth. That said, at least one clan are cursed to sleep close or in the dirt of where they were buried or something along those lines. I don't know the details, but overall we can sleep where we like, so long as the sun can't get us.
So looking back, hearing Eliza's response was a little surprising, but even then the strange, sad gleam in her green eyes was still not what I had expected. "Eh… not exactly what I had in mind, but close enough." Suddenly my apartment was looking like a palace in comparison to wherever she'd been before meeting me. Before I could begin to apologize though, Eliza put a finger to my lips and smiled. "Don't, it was a long time ago, and I've moved on, quite nicely as you've seen."
"Still feel like an ass for bringing it up." I replied softly, but I felt better about making such a stink about my living arrangements.
"Don't worry about it, I would hardly be able to function if I would let something like this bother me."
"Still sorry."
"You can be rather stubborn, has anyone ever told you that before?" Eliza asked, her green eyes seeming to glow brighter as her inherent mischief started to surface.
Now I was able to grin as I playfully pushed Eliza back. She laughed, but grabbed my hand on her way down, and I ended up falling on top of her on the couch. "I might have heard that once or twice." I replied, smirking since she'd been more than happy to remind me since we had started going out regularly. What happened from there? Use your imagination. Because I sure as hell won't tell you, but I will say this. We eventually wound up in my bed, a contented, sweaty tangle of limbs, well...I was the sweaty one, she wasn't, jerk. Not that I was complaining, I was happy, she was happy, I hope, and I thought nothing could go wrong.
That wasn't the first time we'd end up falling into bed, sans clothes, it was just the first. I had gotten used to her disappearing before the sun came up, although she had come up with the believable story she had to work second shift for an unforgiving boss. Well, that wasn't a far stretch, she just failed to mention the fact her 'shift' was really her sleeping in the safety of her haven until the sun went down. And I guess the sun really was unforgiving for a vampire so… yeah, maybe I am just making excuses but damn I loved that girl, woman, vampire, whatever.
Sometimes we'd just stare into each other's eyes after we had satisfied each other, quite vigorously in some cases, other times we'd talk until I passed out, which was often. One time though something a little weird happened as I pulled out one of those notebooks or writing pads most authors tend to keep around for when random ideas pop up. I ended up getting a damned, annoying paper cut. And before you jump to conclusions, no, she didn't bite me that night, but she did suck on my cut finger….a little too much for comfort, but she brushed it off after she came out of whatever trance she'd fallen into. Yet the rest of the night felt like she was privy to something only she knew and was afraid to tell me whatever it was she had discovered.
The next day was like nothing had happened, so I pushed the incident from my mind, but it wasn't until we had nestled in her tub, surrounded by softly glowing candles she had set up before inviting me over to pick up where we had left off the night before, that she asked me something that should have set off alarm bells in hindsight. "What would you do if you could live forever?" Eliza asked, her arms wrapped around my bare midriff as I hummed contently, sprawled out atop her in her bath which as you can imagine, was just as richly appointed as Catherine's home, if a fair bit smaller.
"I don't know." I hummed, eyes closed and perfectly relaxed, but I thought about her question for several moments before giving her an answer. "It'd get boring I know that, but at the same time, it might be kinda fun, depending on who I got to spend the time with." Eliza chuckled knowingly and splashed me for the comment. Still, the moment of levity faded away as I pondered the question in greater detail. "I mean… I don't think I can even imagine what that would entail, what it truly means. Sure I live forever, but that's only one part of the whole package. How it would affect me, everyone around me. And so on."
She seemed taken aback for a moment before a satisfied smile spread over her face. "Most people either want to or they hate the idea, never thinking about what it might cost them."
"Yeah… I can understand that. It's easier that way." I replied with a small shrug. "But I think those that immediately agree are those that are simply afraid of the unknown. If you think about it, that's the scary part about death, you don't know what comes afterwards." Eliza nodded and hummed in agreement as we relaxed once more in the hot water. I didn't know I had just signed my own Embrace, albeit a few weeks later, but having said what I did, Eliza had accepted it as something close to permission I wager. Close enough for her conscience at least, and to make sure her own Beast didn't grow stronger from doing something against her better nature.
Catherine's Penthouse….
Waking up with a jolt, I groaned as a growing familiar ache in the pit of my stomach and the back of my throat flared to life about the same time as my blue eyes snapped open. Damn, that dream had been very vivid. It wasn't entirely unpleasant, but why that one and not something else I couldn't begin to tell you beyond my suspicions it had been stirred up by Lucifer's drawing out my deepest, darkest desires. I can make all the guesses you like, but I was dazed and confused as I stumbled out of Catherine's guest bedroom. It didn't last long, but it was long enough that I didn't immediately register what I was seeing until Catherine gently lowered her….friend, down to a nearby couch, two little neat pinpricks in the side of his neck fast fading when she flicked her tongue across the bite marks. "Oh, pardon me dearie." She was quick to say when she registered my presence, and the slight shock on my face at having woken up to the sight. "I...imagine this must be quite shocking to you."
"What gave you that idea?" I asked, although I had known in the back of my mind that I'd be doing the same thing soon enough. Walking in on such a thing wasn't what I had wanted to do however. It just felt wrong, like walking in on a couple making out, just with less kissing and more sucking blood from the neck. The only reason why I didn't freak out further though is that I could see the guy was still breathing, although he looked a bit paler, and the odder thing was the almost ecstatic look on his face as he slept off being fed upon. Well sure, I knew that the feeding process was rather pleasureable, but I am pretty sure I didn't look like that when Eliza drank from me. Or so I keep telling myself, having since seen my share of post bit people's faces, some made by my own fangs no less. Maybe one day I'll even believe I didn't look high as a kite when Eliza bit me.
As for Catherine, she had since taken the liberty to dab at her lips, removing any presence of her activities, and shrugged at my incredulous blue eye stare. "If I didn't know any better I'd almost say you've stuck to nothing but blood bags, which actually wouldn't surprise me. Some fledglings in this day and age go out of their way to avoid feeding from people directly for as long as possible, when it is so much easier and far more rewarding for us, darling. Not to mention far more satisfying. Cold, stored blood just doesn't have the same kick to it."
"Well, I'm new at this, even by fledging standards. Not even three days since I woke up." You'd think I'd get my big mouth under control, but thankfully Catherine merely smirked, all too aware as to the source of my discomfort about it all.
"Indeed, but you should really try it. You cannot imagine the pleasure you will receive by doing it. And as you can see, he didn't seem to mind." Catherine emphasized her point by gesturing to the drooling idiot on her couch. The goofy, drug like induced grin on his face was doing no favors regarding my opinion of his intelligence, or lack there of. I thought, at the time at least, that anyone stupid enough to let someone bite them got what they deserved. And some people actually do go out of their way to get bit, trust me I've met more than my share. Trouble is, once the hunger gets to be too much, you tend not to care where your blood comes from, only that you get what you need.
I really felt as if she were giving me 'the talk', vampire edition. I'm still not sure how to feel about that. Touched by the fact that she apparently cared, or just plain old awkwardness. I decided to go with awkward. "Thanks but no thanks."
"Your loss, but you will feed eventually, dear. We all do." She was right, I just didn't want to believe it at the time. Before I could say anything else, Catherine walked past me and beckoned me to follow. Giving her boy toy for the evening one last look, although I couldn't tell you if it was out of worry or….something else, I turned and followed, curiosity getting the better of me. Pushing the thought to the wayside, past her priceless treasures of music from around the world, and from well beyond my time, I eventually found myself standing beside Catherine in a small sitting room. Books lined one wall, a fake fireplace was nestled against the back that gave off warmth and a merry little blaze, but it was the picture hanging above the faux stonework around the fireplace that had my attention. I couldn't help the surprise when I looked between the picture and the woman at my side. Catherine nodded in silent acknowledgment at the healthy skinned, living, woman she'd once been that had been immortalized in one of the oldest art forms there is. "My betrothal picture, from a time such things were still done." She said as I took the chair across from her. "While I was still a doe eyed, naive, if pigheaded spoiled brat I might add, with blood still running in her veins. Ah, those days seem like they happened to another person now."
"I wish I could say I understand, but I really don't. Not even the slightest." I replied, unable to imagine having to live through all those different time periods… I couldn't no matter how hard I tried. Now though, it's not so difficult, since I've lived long enough to have seen empires come and go, so I understand all too clearly what it was Catherine told me that day.
Catherine however smiled endearingly and shook her head sadly in response. "I wouldn't expect you to, my dear Alex. No, no one outside of our little community could ever understand what it is to outlast everyone around us that isn't Kindred. To see the times change, to see buildings rise and fall, to see entire countries change over the span of years, decades, until one day you look outside and you don't recognize anything from when you were still human. Only other Kindred will remember who you are, and even we aren't immutable." The weary, tired sigh that she let escape her might as well have symbolized every long, lonely night she had lived through since her own Embrace. "Some Kindred find it too much to bear and willingly walk outside before the sun comes up, ending their existence, such as it is at that point. Some become lost to their Beasts and they have to be put down for their own safety, let alone those around them, while others simply isolate themselves, slipping into Torpor for years unending. I entertain the idea myself, of going to sleep and letting the times change without me, but then I meet someone like you and I find I'm too curious to see where things go to simply disappear into obscurity."
"Someone like me? I doubt that I'm so interesting." I couldn't help but point out, I mean seriously what makes me so special? There had to be more fascinating fledglings than me in New York alone, let alone the rest of the United States.
But Catherine chuckled softly before reaching over and putting a hand on my knee. That got my attention, needless to say. "You honestly don't know your own worth if you say that, dear." She said before her smile started to fade and she put her hand in her lap once more. "I know you must have questions, so many that you don't even know where to start. Let me explain what I called you here for first and we'll go from there, alright? You deserve that much at least."
I nodded and got as comfortable as I could, which wasn't that hard considering the deep cushioned, high backed chair I was nestled in. Catherine leaned back and crossed a leg across her knee, and let her hands fall on her chair's armrests before she began to speak. "As I think we briefly touched upon before, the Camarilla, those clans that respect and uphold the Masquerade such as the Toreador, the Ventrue, and the Tremere, to name a few, have established a great deal of rules to safeguard our existence. It's the reason why no one knows about us save for those few humans that regularly come to us for one reason or another, some to offer their blood to keep us sustained, while getting the ecstasy of being fed upon. Most however don't remember the experience, so we're able to move on without consequence so long as no one else sees us doing so. However, all this had to start somewhere, or at some time the better wording would be, and the Masquerade, and thus the rules that have kept us safe, began in the Dark Ages. We nearly ended up extinct, both because of the Spanish Inquisition, and the Black Death that came soon after."
Even I knew what the Black Death was, and it made sense that such a widespread, devastating plague would have limited the number of people for the Kindred to feed from. And we can transmit diseases from person to person, even if we don't feel the effects of such sickness ourselves, so with what little I knew of the Kindred, it made sense that some would have been literally deathly afraid of ruining their own source of food. As for the Inquisition, well, while they might not have known about vampires and the other supernatural entities walking among them, it didn't take a genius to figure out they still would have caused the vampire community a lot of grief in their own way by knocking on doors, dragging people out of their homes, and generally being a very big, very bad nuisance all the way around.
Furthermore I later learned from Samuel that the feared Society of Leopold was actually a part of the inquisition, which made some of his stories he was willing to share from his time that much harder to believe. Not that he shared much, I got the distinct impression that his time among them was not an enjoyable one. Point being, while the majority of the Inquisition hadn't been aware of the supernatural community, the Society of Leopold had been and are still very much aware, and they made it a point to hunt down the vampires they could find, and they still do to this day as I think I've said before.
But what Catherine said next was still more than a little surprising as she laid out the basic history of the Masquerade's beginnings. "The Ventrue, of which Charles is unfortunately the leader of here in New York, might pretend they keep the house of cards from falling apart, and don't get me wrong, they do their part, but it's our own clan that came up with the idea in the first place. The Toreador are the best when it comes to tearing down the established order, and in forming new ones to replace it." She smirked when she saw my look of mild amazement at that little factoid, and I had no reason not to believe her. Arrogant, jealous, and any number of unsavory terms I could apply to her, liar wasn't among them though. "Yes I thought that'd get your attention. The Ventrue are the leaders, but when it comes to original thinking, they're sorely lacking in imagination. The Tremere, powerful and all too willing to share their vast wisdom, are mired in their books to really care about much beyond their little covens."
It made sense, if what little I'd seen of the Tremere Primogen was anything to go by. The way he so effortlessly used his power to calm Juliet was hard not to forget, that kind of power didn't happen over night, or the control for that matter. Which reminded me. "What about Juliet?"
"The Malkavian." It was the first time I heard something close to, not fear, exactly, but awe in Catherine's voice, as well as respect if not a bit of pity for the girl in question. It was weird, but it would make sense soon enough. "The Malkavians are, touched, by the madness of insight. Each and every one of them are insane, but they are all connected, in some strange way that makes it hard to offend one without several others finding out about the incident. And while they're insane, they can be incredibly useful if you can gain their friendship. Eliza and Juliet were good, true friends, although it's rumored they were...a little more before you came around. I vastly prefer them over some of our more...uncivilized clans, like the Gangrel."
"The Gangrel?" I was quick to ask, unable and unwilling to entertain the thought Eliza had been sleeping with that madwoman before she'd met me. Call me jealous, I'll admit it, then I'll happily rip your heart out and show it to you. As for the Gangrel, they sounded like some exotic fungus, even if I knew better.
"Psh, they gave up their political power for freedom, making them more Anarch than anything." Catherine said with a roll of her eyes before crossing her legs once more. "That said, if you can get a Gangrel to work for you, you'll be the talk of the town since they prefer their solitude, and they are powerful shapeshifters. Most of the myths we have about our kind came from their unique gifts and they are powerful warriors, but all their power comes from the fact their Beasts are all too present on the outside rather than within. Kinda like the Nosferatu honestly, but you know about them, ugly cretins that they are. Oddly enough though, they're the only one of the clans whose bite inflicts agony on the victim rather than ecstasy, and being embraced by one is not pleasant either."
Can't imagine why that might be given what I'd seen of Tim, and what he'd said about the Samedi. If Tim was anything to go by, it made sense that any bite performed by a Nosferatu or a Samedi would hurt like a bitch, but I'd find out later that it went beyond the physical act itself. As for the Embrace, having bits of teeth, claws, and bones shift and move about would indeed hurt, which gave credence to what Catherine had said about the experience. As for the Gangrel? Well, they're something else altogether. Take the physical prowess of the Brujah, and then throw in a lot of mystical ability to create claws, wings, gills, and any number of animalistic characteristics that they like, and the ferocity to match. That's your basic Gangrel in a nutshell, and they are very territorial. Luckily, they prefer to stay out of the cities by and large, unfortunately, if you cross into their home turf without permission, they will hunt you down and play with you before eventually killing you. So, don't go searching for a Gangrel if you prefer to keep all your limbs.
Catherine continued on unabated, having missed my mild disgust at her little comment regarding Juliet and Eliza's time together. "And the Giovanni? Ugh, don't get me started with those incestious little twerps. That said, don't piss off a Giovanni, the rest of their family, and their ghosts, will end you faster than the sun itself, and the worst part is, death is only the beginning for them."
"The way you talk about them I can't help but ask… do the Giovanni actually do something for the Camarilla besides playing undead gangsters?" I said and scratched my head because they sounded more like a risk than anything useful. Oh if only I'd known the trouble they'd cause me later I might not have been so quick to disregard them. There were a few other clans we didn't talk about then and there, but before this is over, I'd wish Catherine had warned me about them. But there's a reason why they say ignorance is bliss.
"They help maintain the Masquerade, and abide by our rules. That is enough." Catherine replied after a moment of consideration. I took that as a, 'nope, largely useless but they don't bother us so we leave them be'. It was probably just as well I didn't press for more because they didn't sound all that inviting, and that quip about being 'incestious twerps' made me wonder if I really wanted to know what they got up to behind closed doors. Still, thankfully Catherine moved things along before my imagination could gain anymore steam. "My point is, everyone provides something to the Camarilla while keeping our existence a secret. We're people persons by and large, we're able to move almost effortlessly through the modern world, and we keep the other Kindred connected through our own social networks. They like to call us degenerates, hedonists, and far less pleasant names when they think we're not listening, or when we are, but they'd be lost without us and they know it, that's why they tend to hate us so much. Although, I'll admit it's an image we cultivate to an extent on purpose, just to throw off our enemies and rivals. People will take shots at the men in charge after all, while leaving the advisors alone, and that's exactly where we do our best work, from the shadows, seen yet unnoticed save for the occasional rude remark."
"So we're what, the Kardashians with more than a handful of brain cells to rub together?" I remember asking, to which Catherine busted into laughter at the absurd yet not too off the mark observation at the same time.
"If it helps to draw such a comparison, dear." She replied as her laughter died down into far more 'ladylike' chuckles. "But yes, we're social butterflies, keeping our fangs contained until we need them, and we are masters at manipulating a crowd. Surely you've noticed something of that nature happening to you already, dear? Of being able to bend those far beneath you to your will with a coy look and a few well placed words?" Flashbacks of how I had so easily talked my way past those thugs in the warehouse before burning it down came to mind, and Catherine nodded, having already put as much together as she took my silence as confirmation. "Jack might not be the best influence, but he's been around long enough to know all of our tricks, Toreador and otherwise. Presence opens a lot of doors on its own, but all the power in the world means nothing without the will to use it, darling."
"But… I don't know if I should use this power. I mean just because I can doesn't mean I should, right?" I hesitantly asked.
Catherine gave a heavy sigh and leaned back. "Ugh, Eliza was the same, always hesitant to use the gifts we have been given. If we have them why not use them? To us, humans are as cattle is to them, why not make them feel your superiority through your very presence?" She held up a hand to stop my expected protests before I could begin to voice them. "Alex, darling, you're no longer a part of the natural order of things, none of us are. We must do what we deem necessary to keep our connection to our humanity yes, especially since we Toreador are so affected by its loss, but that doesn't mean we can't enjoy ourselves in the process."
I don't know what was more alarming, or disturbing, the fact Catherine was so cavalier about her nightly activities, or that she seemed to enjoy the power she had over those she seduced and fed upon as she desired. And make no mistake, that is exactly what she did as I'd find out later. While our existence must be kept a secret at all costs, the Masquerade is...flexible, especially where our presence is known and accepted by those that purposely put themselves out there to be seduced and bitten by a Kindred. Hell, it wasn't even illegal to kill a human while feeding on them, as long as it didn't compromise our safety. The greatest problem from such an act is the loss of humanity while doing so, but aside from that no one cared. Well...most vampires don't anyway, of which Catherine was one of those that didn't seem to care all that much about what she left in her wake.
I think that was my problem, I did. Unlike so many others, I cared, perhaps because I was just too afraid or stubborn to let go of my human nature in such a way, but I could never bring myself to look at them like cattle or the like. Even after I got my first taste of blood right from the source, rather than a bag, I couldn't see them as mere 'juice bags on legs.' The day that I do is the day I walk into broad daylight. Catherine must have seen my discomfort though, and sighed endearingly. "Give it time Alex, it might take a couple centuries, but we all end up in the same place sooner or later."
"Can you tell me why Eliza was….given a Final Death?" I asked, hoping to both change the subject and that I got the wording right as to what it was to be killed as a vampire.
Catherine nodded and leaned forward. "This is going to sound cold, but it's a simple matter of population control." That was supposed to be cold? She had just been talking about humans like they were nothing but blood bags, and she was talking about one of her own like this? She continued, either ignoring my stupefied look or just not caring. "We try to keep our numbers stable, too few and we loosen our grip on how many people can be Embraced, too many and we have to crack down, especially on past offenders. Eliza….soft hearted as she was, had been warned before that she couldn't make anymore Kindred until a set time next year, but she went ahead and did so anyway. I'm sure she had a good reason, and if I had been able to do more to protect her, I would have, but Charles wouldn't hear it. Not that I can honestly blame him. As much as we all might hate the Ventrue, they have the unenviable job of keeping things from falling apart in their own way, and they have their fingers in the most pies. The stresses of leadership are not easy to bear, even for the Ventrue, who are often times groomed from an early age to be the captains of industry, the ones that lead the way, and so on and so on."
To hear Catherine talk about Charles, despite our mutual dislike of him, he was someone to be respected and almost pitied even if he was a total douche. That didn't mean I'd ever like him, or pity him however, especially because she had also made it clear that it had been his decision to have Eliza destroyed on the spot. That raised a good question however. "How did they even find us so damn fast?" I asked, and immediately wished I hadn't as Catherine looked away.
"I believe someone told Charles in the hopes of earning favor with him. It happens, far more than I'd like, especially in what some call these Final Nights." I didn't know what to do with this kind of information. I briefly considered demanding to know the name of the one who ratted us out, so that I could show him just how much pain he had caused me before I forced myself to calm down. She probably didn't know, and most likely wouldn't have told me even if she did. Besides, even if I found the guy or girl, they would probably be far more dangerous than me.
Instead I took a breath and slumped in my chair with a huff before something Catherine said caught my interest. "Final Nights?" I asked, curious as to what she meant.
She relaxed and seemed more than a little happy for the change of subject. "Some people, foolishly I might add, believe that we're nearing the end of our cursed existence, that our ancient creators, the original vampires that made our respective clans, are going to come back and consume us all, reclaiming their cursed blood in the process. We call it Gehenna, and since we're all descended from Caine, or again as some believe, you'll likely come across those that refer to themselves as Cainites rather than Kindred."
"Caine? As in the Caine and Abel?" I might not have liked all those Sunday school stories, but I still remember my bible fables. Caine was cursed by God when he murdered Abel, and so he was never able to find peace, even when he eventually died or whatever, I don't remember the exact details. The vampire version however, has it that Caine was the first vampire to ever walk the Earth, and from his blood, the rest of us were created.
"The very same. I thought I remember seeing in the background information that was gathered that you were raised in a religious setting." My derisive snort had Catherine raising an eyebrow. "I take it you didn't like it very much."
"My mother's idea, not mine." I said as calm as I could, which wasn't saying a lot considering the current topic. I absolutely loathed it when it was brought up.
Catherine nodded, none too surprised at my hostility on the subject. "Parents can be our best friends or our greatest enemies. That betrothal picture might have me smiling and 'happy' for the occasion, but the man my father had found for me was a pig. I had no say in the matter, no girl during that time could refuse such a match without forever scandalizing their entire family, and divorce? It was far easier to simply poison your husband and move on to a more desirable match, so long as you weren't caught of course. So you're not telling me anything I haven't experienced for myself, in a manner of speaking." She chuckled then and raised an imaginary glass to the picture above the fireplace. "But then I was Embraced, and I had the last laugh. My husband to be never knew what hit him. I had to make myself scarce afterwards, but my Sire was a far more welcome friend than the pig I would have otherwise been forced to live with. I'd do it all again if given the chance, but at the same time, once was enough."
I could sympathize with her feelings on that matter, but to hear her talk like that about murder was more than a little disconcerting. Which was kind of ironic since this statement was issued by me, the girl who burned a whole gang of slavers to ash. Shaking my head of that particular line of thought, I sighed since now I felt like I owed Catherine at least a partial explanation as to my own personal history, even if she knew most of it from whatever the Nosferatu had been able to find on me. There was still a pretty big difference between what was on a computer screen and what a person will tell you themselves though. "My mom was always a bit of a religious nutjub. I don't think there were a lot of times I could say I ever felt loved by her. She never abused me or anything, but that's about the only good thing I can say about her. I didn't really feel comfortable around her, and all the times she dragged me to Sunday school were like going to court enforced AA meetings or something."
"What religion did she hold to?" Catherine asked gingerly, probably because she was afraid of offending me after I had almost bit her head off the last time not ten minutes ago.
"Christianity, ironic since they're more about forgiveness, compassion, and all that other dribble. Nope, she was all about the fire and brimstone and hellfire, and condemning anything that didn't fit her views, myself included given my sexual preferences." I spat out before rubbing my hands down my face in tired exasperation, but I waved her off when she started to apologize for prying, although she hadn't asked, not really. "Not your fault, and it was at least bearable while dad was still around. He was my best friend, but to this day I don't know why he married 'Her Holiness'. Maybe she was a different person before I was born, I don't know, and I never asked. Probably should have in hindsight, but psh, doesn't matter now, especially now I imagine. She'd probably take one look at me and pretend I wasn't there, or try and shove her cross down my throat if she knew what I was now."
"I'd almost pay money to see her try, before ripping her throat out myself if you didn't." Catherine remarked offhandedly, but grimaced when she saw the uncomfortable look on my face. "I'm sorry, I spoke out of turn."
"No...it's alright. She is still my mother though, even if I hate her guts." I replied softly and looked away even as a red tear started to form in the corner of my eye. I guess I wasn't out of tears after all. More amazingly, although after seeing the almost human woman underneath all of Catherine's predatory smiles and looks, maybe it shouldn't have been as the elder vamp stood to her feet and pulled me close. Something about the gesture, so...motherly, so warm despite the fact she probably hadn't been alive for at least a couple centuries, made whatever walls I had started to build around my grief crumble as it all came rushing back.
"Sssshhhhh, it's okay childe." Catherine crooned, her fingers running through my hair in such a way that brought comfort to my battered psyche as I stained her nightwear, to call her satin robes mere pajamas would have been an insult, red with my tears. She didn't seem to care, and merely held me tighter against her and let me carry on without complaint. "It's okay."
There is one thing I forgot to mention about being a Toreador, although I think you likely figured it out by now. Because we're so close to our former human selves, we tend to be subject to increased surges of emotions. Being repressed and forced to endure my mother's whims had led me to bottle up a lot of my shit, and now I wasn't able to control it all from bursting out as it was now. Granted, a lot had happened between then and now, but it annoyed and frustrated me to no end when I eventually came out of my latest bout of sobbing. Still, I felt better, and Catherine looked down at me in approval as she knelt and dabbed at my eyes with the same bit of cloth she had used on her lips earlier, I realized later. "Sorry…." I hiccuped as I slowly pulled myself together.
Catherine only smiled and continued cleaning up my crimson tears before cupping my cheeks in her hands. "Don't apologize, dear Alex. You're young, in every way that matters, and you've been through a great deal more than most Kindred in recent years. I know...I haven't been the easiest person to deal with, but if you ever need me, for anything, I'll do what I can for you. Eliza was my friend as well, after all, although she was so much more for you I imagine." She softly stated before gently pulling me to my feet.
I appreciated the gesture, and nodded as I accepted the cloth she'd been using to clean up my face. It was all I could do because I was still a bit choked up by her unexpected, motherly overtures that I can't honestly ever remember receiving before that moment. If that doesn't shout cruel irony, I don't know what will. That I received something close to motherly affection from a woman that saw humans as walking cows over my own mother was just sad, yet there it is. Still, as much grief Catherine would cause me later, I do owe her a great deal as I owe Samuel a great deal, albeit for very different reasons.
Bidding me to get cleaned up for the night before heading out, I followed Catherine's instructions, fingers wrapped tightly around the blood stained cloth she'd given me as if it were keeping me anchored. I was still shaken up, but the feeling was fading as I left her side to tend to my personal needs. When I'd come back, there was a bottle of blood waiting on the table that'd been between us, and I wasted no time in draining its contents. I probably looked very unladylike, drinking from a bottle of blood right from the bottle itself, like your typical wine addicted drunk no less, but I didn't give a damn as it did its job, and I finally felt ready to face another long night of who knew what.
And as was quickly becoming blessed routine for him, Samuel was waiting for me in the lobby, looking far better than I had been feeling earlier. "Hey, I was starting to wonder if I'd have to ping your phone." He teased, which made me smile as I soon fell in lockstep with my self appointed bodyguard and friend. "Catherine didn't give you too much lip I hope?"
I shook my head and smiled a little wider, gladdened by the fact he was, as always, worried far more for my wellbeing. "No, she was….very nice actually." I wasn't about to tell him how she'd been more of a mother than my own mother, not yet at least, and he let it go with a nod as we soon found ourselves outside. The heavy rain clouds in the sky got a dubious look from me, but Samuel only chuckled as he produced the same umbrella he'd used to get me to my apartment our first day together.
"What? Did you really think I used this thing for sunlight only? It does rain in New York you know." He teased, only to laugh when I stuck my tongue out at him.
"Really? I never noticed." I asked in mock seriousness and rolled my eyes. "Still, nice to see you again. I'd thought you'd be bored by yet another clueless fledgling you'd have to show the ropes."
Samuel shrugged as he looked over in my direction for a second before climbing into the van once we'd reached our ride. "I may have been there when they wake up for the first time and the like, but usually it's their sire which shows them how it's done. As far as this whole situation goes, it's a new experience for both of us." He admitted, but he seemed content with the situation at hand, and I wasn't about to complain in any event.
"Huh, and here I thought you would do stuff like this everyday. Was actually starting to wonder why you stuck around for so long." I told him honestly which caused him to laugh.
"Alex, even if I were responsible for other fledglings… it isn't like people get Embraced all the time." He responded, still chuckling merrily. "And so far the experience certainly has been… unique."
"Thank you." I replied honestly, knowing that all of this would have been far harder without his support." Truly, thank you."
His eyes softened as he looked at me, with a small smile he put an arm around my shoulder and pulled me into him. "No problem, seriously. I enjoy your company." Despite being surprised by his sudden embrace I made no move to free myself, to be honest I rather enjoyed it. It made me feel normal again.
And then reality decided to kick in when Samuel's cell phone went off just as he started to turn the van's engine on. Taking a peek at the message, he gave a thoughtful noise before tucking it away in his latest black suit. Why he had so many black suits and ties, making him look like an extra on Men in Black, I don't know, but it looked good on him as he started us on our way. "Looks like Tim's got a hit for our little trap. A meeting's been arranged to talk things over. Hopefully our Samedi friend decides to show up."
"And if he doesn't?" I asked.
"Well, we'll cross that bridge when we come to it." He told me with a small shrug, looking rather unconcerned by the whole affair. I envied his calm posture. If I had still been prone to such a human habit, I might have been biting my nails down to the quick in nervous anticipation of something going sideways. Because something in the pit of my stomach said this was not going to be so easy.
I hate it when I'm right.
End Notes: Vergil1989: Lol well, we've so far avoided a full blown rated M, but we got pretty close this round. It probably won't be long, maybe next chapter, maybe the immediate one following this one, we might bump this up so we don't have to tread the line so carefully, but that aside, we hope giving a more detailed glimpse of Eliza and our heroine, Alex, was what you were after in regards to her past. We'll drop more hints as things continue, but next chapter is going to be...messy, although I think we made that pretty clear with that rather cliffhanger esque ending lol. As for Catherine, I was a little surprised myself when I began that scene with Nomad in how we made her almost a motherly figure to the poor girl. Whether that continues to be the case is yet to be decided, but we'll see. Anyway, enjoy folks!
Nomad-117: There you have it, the first step of their plan has been made. But it would be foolish to assume that all will go according to plan, I mean when was the last time something was as easy as that? I'll guess we'll see next chapter just what happened so far. One way or another, alea iacta est. The die is cast, for those not versed in Latin. See ya!
