CHAPTER 4: SOUTHERN RAIDERS PART 1

Everyone had fallen asleep around the fire. That night had been the most relaxing one the gang had had in a while. The next morning dawned bright and balmy, with a gentle caressing breeze that even Zuko was too comfortable not to sleep through. When midday hit, Aang woke to the sound of birds singing, but it was quickly drowned out by the sound of an incoming object. Aang jumped to his feet and air bended what turned out to be an explosive up in the mountainside above. He hurried to the ledge just in time to see several Fire Nation war balloons rising up before him. Everyone was on their feet at the sound of more projectiles being launched in their direction. Aang air bended the metal shutters that surrounded the temple closed. Katara watched him in groggy confusion as more explosives hit. Zuko rubbed his eyes and his gaze fell on Katara. He felt a stab of queasiness in his stomach as he saw the ceiling above her crumbling. In an instant he jumped into her, knocking her out of harm's way.

Katara couldn't explain why she was so furious, but she was. Long after everyone else had dozed off, she had been up thinking about Zuko…or rather, their relationship. She knew he was trouble. That was first and foremost. And she did not trust him- that was second. But she couldn't shake the feeling that they were destined to be friends of some sort. Something deep inside her said that the connection she had felt in Ba Sing Se was no mere whim. With all that on her mind, the last thing she needed was him saving her! (K) This is already confusing enough without him saving my life! "What are you doing?!", she exclaimed angrily. (Z) What is wrong with her? I just saved her life! "Keeping rocks from crushing you" replied Zuko matter-of-factly. (Z) Why does she look so angry?! What's her problem?! Katara realized with a jolt that Zuko's arm was around her waist. To her shock and mild horror, she found that it actually felt…comforting? "Okay! I'm not crushed; you can get off me now!", said Katara. She got to her feet and ran off. She heard Zuko mumbling something about a thank you, but she ignored him. Whatever she had felt only seconds before was not only confusing, but upsetting. And upsetting because it was confusing! Toph and Haru had earthbended a large enough opening in the walls of the temple for everyone, including Appa to fit through. Aang was tugging hard at his reins. Katara ran into the mouth newly created cave and turned when she heard Aang yell, "What are you doing?!". Zuko was staring over the edge of the cliff. "Go ahead. I'll hold them off. I think this is a family visit". (K) Family visit? Does he mean Azula?! Appa groaned loudly. There was no time to even think about that. She and her brother hurried forward to help Aang with Appa's reins.

Zuko aimed a fistful of fire at one of the war balloons, when his sister's rose directly in front of him. Toph and Haru were busy trying to keep everyone safe from the falling stone debris of the temple as they ushered them through the cave. The trouble was that Appa absolutely refused to be drawn into a cave once again. Minutes later Katara sat in Appa's saddle seething with anger that her father and some of their friends had to go through the tunnel without them. Toph and Aang held an earth shield over Appa's face long enough for them to escape the immediate vicinity unscathed. (K) Wait…where's Zuko? As if magically summoned by her thoughts, Katara spotted Zuko rising on another air balloon. Suddenly he ran at full speed and jumped over to Azula's war balloon. Azula was shooting blue flames at Zuko and he was blocking all of her advances. Katara wanted to keep an eye on him, but they were still under attack from the other vessels. With Aang navigating and Toph without any earth, it was up to her. She bended the water out of her water skin and blocked the massive fireballs that were hurtling toward them. She knew she had to be quick. They had to grab Zuko and get out. When they finally got closer to his position, he was still in the midst of battling his younger sister. Azula pulled her arm back to deliver a fiery blow to Zuko, but Zuko was doing the same. Apparently, they were evenly matched. Both of them went hurtling backwards, falling off of the airship. Katara poised herself to grab him as Aang flew Appa in the falling Zuko's direction. She reached up and grabbed firm hold of one of his forearms, and then grabbed the other. (K) Now we're even.

That night, the gang sat around a fire on a grassy cliff a little off of a deserted shore. They set up camp until they could find a more suitable place. Aang made a comment about how it felt like old times, and Zuko made a joke about chasing him and trying to capture him. Katara could hardly listen. She heard herself mutter an annoyed "Ha ha". (K) How can they even laugh at that?! Sokka proposed a toast in Zuko's honor. (K) Is he serious? Am I the only one who remembers the things he did to us?! "I'm touched", said Zuko quietly after everyone toasted to him. "I don't deserve it". "Yeah, no kidding", said Katara darkly before standing up to storm off. She stomped over to another side of the cliff overlooking the waves crashing up against the cliff. (K) How can everyone just sit there and act like he never did anything?! I can't even believe Aang laughed at his stupid joke! And toasting to him?! Are they all…! Katara felt a presence behind her. A quick back glance told her who it was. (K) Great. The absolute last person I wanted to see. Zuko had been putting up with her attitude for weeks now. He had tried to remain calm. Most of the time he didn't respond to her. If he did, he generally spoke quietly. But his annoyance had grown since he had saved her life earlier that day, and she repaid him with more disdain. Now he felt his confusion and anger rising, but he still tried to keep a rein on it. "This isn't fair!", he exclaimed. "Everyone else seems to trust me now! What is it with you?!". (K) Did he really just…?! Her own temper was now boiling out of control. "Oh everyone trusts you now?! I was the first person to trust you, remember?! Back in Ba Sing Se!". She pointed an angry finger out towards the rolling waves. Zuko was stunned silent. "And you turned around and betrayed me! Betrayed all of us!". Zuko dropped his head. Now he understood. (Z) Of course. I did betray her…her specifically. I knew we had made a connection in those caves in Ba Sing Se…and I went ahead and betrayed her anyway. Under the fury, he could see the hurt in her bright blue eyes. Zuko felt guilt sear through his gut like it was cut with a hot knife. His focus was steady, but his mind was buzzing. (Z) I have to make this right somehow! I've hurt her so badly…"What can I do to make it up to you?", he heard himself ask.

Zuko decided that it was best for him to have a talk with Sokka. Re-conquering Ba Sing Se in the name of the Earth King was definitely a valid request, however impossible…and however sarcastically she requested it. But why would Katara connect him to her mother's death? When they had been alone together in the caves, she told him that her mother had been killed in the war somehow. But they had never gotten far enough into their conversation for her to explain how. And he would not have asked even if they did have more time. He didn't particularly care for bringing up painful memories himself.

Katara had stormed away to her tent and flopped angrily onto her sleeping bags. (K)What can he do to make it up to me?! "Argh!" She punched her pillow forcefully and a few feathers scattered. She knew her responses made no sense. How could he just go and re-conquer Ba Sing Se? And as for bringing her mother back…of course that was impossible. (K) It makes no sense, but so what! I'm so angry! But seconds later her angry visage melted, and she could feel tears silently streaming down her face. "Mom! I miss you so much!", she sobbed into her pillow.

Speaking with Sokka had definitely been the right way to go, thought Zuko as he left Sokka's tent. As if simply losing her mother wasn't hard enough, she lost her in a Fire Nation raid. Now he knew what he would do. And more importantly, he knew what she needed. He started to head toward her tent and then hesitated. (Z) Will she even speak to me right now? In his head, Zuko could see the angry flash in her eyes as plain as day. So much anger. And hurt. It was probably best to wait until morning. At the same time, he wanted to speak to her before she spoke to anyone else. The topic of "who murdered your mother" was a touchy one he didn't want to bring up in front of anyone else, and he knew that she would not agree to go off and have a talk with him alone. He decided to sit on a large rock that was outside of her tent to wait for morning.

The next day dawned and for the second day in a row, Zuko slept right through it. He stirred when he heard fabric rustling. Katara had stepped out of her tent and fixed a quick angry scowl in his direction. "You look terrible", she said curtly as she walked past him and headed to her satchel to grab a comb. As she detangled her curly tresses, Zuko told her what he knew. He was surprised to see her stop combing and turn to face him. "How do you know?", she asked sharply. "Last night I spoke with Sokka. He described the flags that were on the ships of the soldiers who raided your village. The flags of the Southern Raiders. It was their leader who killed your mother". "The Southern Raiders?". Zuko nodded. "How do you know it was their leader?". "The way Sokka described it to me, they didn't come and try to seriously hurt anyone else. And once they had your mother, they left. They were on a special mission, and more often than not, it's the leader who carries those out". Katara nodded, her face set in determination. "Why do you want to help me?", she asked quietly. "Because I know you need this in order to move on". Katara stared him down, but not like the way she usually did with angry glares and scowling. This time Zuko felt like she was taking a measurement of him. "Back in Ba Sing Se, I wasn't lying when I told you my mother was taken from me", he continued. "On the day of the eclipse, I found out from my father that my mother might still be alive because she was only banished. But even not knowing that, whether or not she's alive, makes me feel stuck…like I can never go forward in life until I find out what happened to her. If I could get some kind of closure, I think I'd feel more…whole". Katara's eyes softened. She nodded silently and walked over to sit on the rock Zuko had been sitting on when she came outside.

"Zuko…". Zuko's ears perked up at the sound of Katara's voice. There was uncertainty in it; something he rarely ever heard. Her expression was something in between wistfulness and anger. "Yeah?". She now looked up at him, indecision written in her eyes. "What will I do when I face him?". Zuko was not prepared for that question. "Uhh…what do you mean?". "That is what I mean. What do I do?". She stared down at the patchy grass. "That man is a monster. If I…ended him, that would be what he deserves…right?". (Z) I don't think I've ever seen her look so vulnerable…at least not with me. Zuko sat down next to her. "Is that what you think?", he asked. Katara shook her head. "I don't know. I mean…is it justice or is it revenge?". Zuko put his hand on his chin to think. "Well, it's probably a bit of both. He murdered someone. That's a crime punishable by law in all four Nations, and even if it wasn't, most would say it's wrong anyway. At the same time, you want to bring him to justice yourself because of how he wronged your family, so it's still sort of revenge". Katara nodded. "So what do I do?". Zuko shrugged. "What do you want to do?". "I want to end him", said Katara frankly. "Every part of me wants him gone from this world". "So, there's your answer", said Zuko.

Katara frowned. "But is that right?". Her mind was trying wildly to reconcile why she felt she could ask Zuko of all people if something was right, and depend upon the answer. Zuko hesitated for a moment. He did not think it would be "right" for her to end her mother's murderer, but he did know that either way, she needed to face that man. Still, if his uncle had taught him anything, it was that people often needed to arrive at such answers themselves. Katara waited, looking directly into his eyes, almost pleadingly. The golden eyed stare that looked back at her was sincere and honest. "Katara, the whole point is to give you closure. Only you know what will make you come to terms with what happened". Katara sighed and leaned forward to lay her head in her hands. Her arm brushed up against Zuko's. Ordinarily she might have flinched away from him, but right now the warmth of his skin felt so comforting, as much as she hated to admit it. (K) What should I do? How will I know what to do when I'm actually in front of him? "You don't need to worry about that right now", Katara heard Zuko say. She looked up at him. "You'll know what to do when you're actually face-to-face with him". (K) How does he…it's like he read my mind! Katara couldn't help but give him a small, smile. It was good to know that someone kind of understood. (Z) Did she just…smile? At me? The corners of her mouth were still twitched up. (Z) Wow…she looked so pretty from that little smile. I bet she looks beautiful when she really smiles. Zuko shook his head slightly. (Z) What am I thinking about?!

"We should probably start getting some supplies together", said Zuko, changing the subject within his own mind. Katara nodded. He stood, and Katara felt a peculiar sense of loss when his arm was no longer touching hers. She shook the feeling away and stood up with him. "Make sure you bring anything you might need", said Zuko turning to her. "Alright", said Katara, feeling determined once again. She turned to walk over to her bag to start preparing. Zuko started to walk toward his own tent when he stopped and looked back. "And Katara?". Katara spun to face him. "It'll take at least a day or so to figure out where they're stationed, and then perhaps as much as a day or two to get to them if we travel fast enough, so we'll need Appa". Katara nearly fell over. "Uhh…yeah", she mumbled out loud. She would have to ask Aang's permission. And he would want to know where she was taking Appa. And she couldn't lie to him; he was her best friend! Katara cursed inwardly. She had just begun to feel like it might be okay if she ended that monster, but now she felt guilty. Zuko's expression said everything she was thinking in her head. Aang might not approve.

As Katara readied herself, she felt more and more sure that getting rid of that guy was probably best for the whole world. How many other families had he broken up? When she finished, she headed over to Zuko's tent to see if he was ready. He had dark stealth cloaks for them to wear and she packed the one he handed to her. Somehow, just walking through the small camp with Zuko strengthened her resolve to rid the world of the murderous monster. Unfortunately, telling Aang went just how Katara thought it would go. He disapproved. He preached to her about justice versus revenge. He actually compared her to Jet! But most painfully of all, it felt like her best friend didn't understand her at all! Even Zuko stood up for her and said it was what she needed. The rest of the day she sat resignedly on the ledge of the cliff she had been standing on the night before when Zuko came to speak to her.