The following is a non-profit fan-based parody. Dragonball, Dragonball Z, and Dragonball GT are all owned by Funimation, Toei Animation, and Akira Toriyama. Please support the Official release.

And the Abridged series, upon which this is based.

Who have seriously been doing this show for over six years now.

"I can't believe Goku had a sister, I wish he'd told me before!" Chi-Chi placed a pot of rice on the table, "It's been so wonderful having you bring back my Gohan, I haven't seen him this happy in months! Or at all, because of that damn green pri-"

"Well, uh, to be fair...I am sort of responsible for Kakarot's death, and, uh, kidnapped...Him to be...Begin with…" Tamata admitted. Chi-Chi glared. Tamata smiled, "But it's always good to spend time with family, right, Gohan?"

"You have serious issues," Gohan told her.

"You have no idea."

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Months have passed, and Tamata has brought Gohan home, to train him in the ways of the Saiyans, and, for whatever reason, further his education, because, yeah, sure, that'll help him train for the genocidal super-beings intent on eradicating the planet.

"Oh come on you're the ONE person who actually knows what I'm up to!"

Yeah well you break the flow of the show.

"Isn't that the point? I'm not here to coddle these idiots by letting them do whatever it is they were up to, I'm here to break the mold, create new solutions and present a new point of view. You know what? I don't have to take this. There are other narrators. I'm appealing to the author."

Wait, what? You can't do that!

"The hell I can't! Hey! Writer-man! We gotta talk about this narrator. I gotta put up with enough crap from the rest of the cast, I don't need an omniscient, disembodied voice acting like just because I'm a fan-written genderswap, I can't contribute to the franchise."

((Well to be fair this isn't exactly one of my better pieces.))

Wait you can talk?

((I mean yeah it's my fanfiction I can do whatever I want. See?))

I'm a little teapot, short and stout! Here is my handle, here is my spout.

"Well, if you can genderswap me, you can genderswap the narrator, or something!"

((I mean, the narrator's part of the show, and you were really the only thing I intended to change, and just sort of see where everything went.))

"Please, let's be real you don't really care about continuity. I mean, come on, I bring Gohan back to his hometown? Why would I even care about Gohan?"

((You wanted to keep him safe, protecting the only basis for your plan to resurrect your species? Also because you wanted to be involved in a home life that was based on love, however corrupted, rather than the overbearing machismo hyper-masculine culture that has long repressed you, judging you entirely on your gender and cultural station, both of which have no scientific basis and is shaped only on the prejudices of existing institutions that you have taken upon yourself to rebel against?))

Tamata stared at the sky.

"I still want a new narrator."

((Oh what are you gonna do, strike? Make me find a new Tamata? Oh please.))

Tamata scowled, and took a breath.

"I'll write reviews on all your other fanfictions."

Silence.

((You drive a hard bargain, fictional character of my own creation. And you have a deal.))

Wait what? No! You can't do this to me!

Hi! I'm the new narrator! Where were we?

No! This isn't possible, I'm the narrator from the show, you can't replace me!

Yeah, well, I'm the narrator of everything else the author's written since 2014, and I'm being brought in to replace you. So, if you would, hand over the script and your notes, and clear out your desk by three, all right?

You bi-

((All right, yeah, I see your point, Tamata, this guy's gotta go.))

Woah! Hey! Put me down! I'm the narrator! That's like firing the narrator from the Stanley Parable! YOU NEED ME! DO YOU HEAR ME! I'LL BE BACK!

((Sorry about that.))

No problem. These things happen.

((All right, so while I have you here, what do you think of the Yamcha ship? I'm still undecided, I mean, he's not really different from the rest of the cast, just weak.))

I mean I know what you have planned for it, and I think it's good but it needs work. It just doesn't fit well, especially with the way things turn out with the Bulma-Vegeta thing. I don't think it's an overnight ship sort of deal, the characters wouldn't let any of them down if you really think about how they'd react in the show to a pairing like that.

"Wait are you talking about shipping ME? With some guy called Yamcha? I gotta admit, I'm not comfortable with that."

Yeah it gets real weird once you break the fourth wall.

((Super awkward, but listen, what I've got in mind, he turns out to be a really sweet guy. Very supportive, but it's a journey for him. He goes through a lot, and you two find strength in one another. It's a bit sappy, but not sickeningly so. Also, he's super cute.))

"Huh. That does sound pretty good, actually. But I'm just not sure if I'm ready for a relationship, and I don't like the idea of one being forced on me."

((Yeah, I know, I hear you. I don't want to force anything on you, either, which is why I asked for feedback on the idea. On the one hand, he sticks pretty closely to the fragile masculinity trope. But on the other hand, that kind of plays into what I had in mind, with Yamcha's 'Feminist awakening' making him a better-and even stronger-person, and character, rather than the bit role he is in the show and in the, um, show.

But let's be real, this whole thing is about you, Tamata. Like I said, you were the only thing I intended to change, and I want you to be there for all the major events. I want to illustrate how, with more diverse representation, DBZ could have had stronger characters and less formula. Break the mold and get a flood of content sort of thing.))

You're getting a bit preachy here.

((Shit, yeah, I know, and I didn't want to do that, either. Sorry, I'm talking a whole bunch and dominating this conversation, please, I want to know what you think. You both are a part of this, too.))

"Well I like the idea of more Saiyan women. There's not a lot of us in the history books, and that really sucks."

And also, the only character change is the narrator and one villain-turned-protagonist? You can make more changes than that.

((Yeah but the point of the fic is-))

Who cares? Have fun with the characters, do something new! People have been watching Dragonball Z for literally over twenty years. The franchise could do with some shaking up. Just not too much, or we end up with a Dragonball Evolution.

"What's that?"

((You don't want to know. All right, well, what kind of changes? Make Freeza actually a woman instead of the whole androgynous thing?))

"What about a new plotline?"

((Eh I'm not that invested.))

"Oh good to know the entity that controls my entire existence cares so damn much."

((Listen you're just gonna get forgotten about in like, three days, and sit around until I *might* update you in like two years, so don't be too snide. Enjoy the time you've got.))

Well how about expanding on an existing plotline?

((The Freeza Saga's pretty well paced and the Majin Buu sagas are insufferable.))

That leaves the Android-Cell sagas, doesn't it? You've already introduced Gero early.

((That's a good point. But we're starting to get into spoiler territory. We should get back to the fic.))

All right, so where were we again?

"I just kidnapped Gohan from Piccolo."

Right. What were you going to do?

"Bring him back home, train with him?"

Hmmm. That needs more explanation, we should do an episode on that.

((Hey aren't I the one writing this thing?))

I'm just Saiyan.

"That's not funny."

((It's really not.))

Oh come on they do it in the show!

((It's not funny there either. Which is the joke.))

Oh. Okay, well, still. We should start with Tamata bringing Gohan home.

((Yeah that's a good point, let's start there.))

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