Many hugs and a big Cybertronian cake to iratepirate, a wonderful friend and my beta reader. What can we do when a dearest friend is celebrating her birthday so many miles away from you? Exactly! Use the Space Bridge :o)

I also want to thank Fire Redhead for throwing me an important hint for the contents of this chapter. Way to go, Lady Succubot!



Chapter 4

My own private Iacon

A perfect triangle challenged the terrestrial sky, keeping its impressive symmetry as it surpassed more than three times the speed of sound.

Six Cybertronian Seekers were flying like one, forming the sides and angles of that impeccable geometric figure that had already claimed planet Earth's sky as its territory.

Starscream led the group, closely followed by Skywarp at his left and Thundercracker at his right. The triangle was completed by Dirge, Thrust and Ramjet. The perfect aerial formation exhibited the thoroughness and order that only a robotic intelligence could reach, but not even those advanced machines were free from being guided by independent feelings. They were sentient beings after all.

As every time he led a mission, Starscream was completely focused on his objective. Despite his passionate and voluble personality, the Decepticon Air Commander was very capable of becoming a cold killing machine when he wanted to, although when problems arose he lost control.

Skywarp, also following a habit, denoted emotion with every roar of his engines. The proximity of a battle, no matter if his enemies were Autobots or organic creatures, managed to center his distracted and superficial temperament on one main objective: destroy the enemy. Despite the vain opinion that most of his comrades had of him, it was during combat missions when Skywarp showed as one of the most loyal and lethal Decepticons ever created.

As for the Coneheads, they shared a common goal that surpassed the differences of their personalities. Pride and ambition united them more than the fact that they had been assembled together. They were an important part of the Aerial Elite of the Decepticon Army, but they hadn't managed to overcome Starscream, Skywarp and Thundercracker in being the most efficient and deadliest trine of Seekers of modern Cybertronian history. Patient and yet with their egos hurt, Ramjet, Dirge and Thrust knew their moment would come. They would make it happen.

If a telepath had had access to the processors of the six fliers that plowed through the skies at supersonic speed, said mind-reader would have been amazed by the Seekers' ability to keep their perfect aerial formation despite being assaulted by radically different thoughts. Combat machines, but individuals at the end.

Thundercracker wasn't the exception. Nothing in the way he was flying suggested the inner storm he was currently suffering.

For the first time since he had memory, the sky wasn't a liberator, but an open field for anguish.

But no, it wasn't the first time. It had happened before. Many times he had returned to his respective military base with his weapons almost empty and his armor soiled with the vital fluids of others, knowing he had to feel satisfied because he was fighting for a fair cause, but internally feeling empty, dirty…

He had learned to live with that, nevertheless; to accept the fact that every time he returned from a battle something of himself was left behind, lying among all those corpses of allies and enemies that would never feel ever again.

In the beginning he had thought that it was the unavoidable rotation of justice that kept him functioning, but soon he learned that no such thing as justice existed on the battlefield. What mattered was skill, strength, pure luck… If he wanted to be the one who returned instead of the one in shattered pieces, he had to leave behind as many enemies as he could… his victims.

It was strange that all those thoughts, hidden for countless vorns but always on the edge of torturing him, were coming back precisely on that flat planet that had nothing to do with Cybertron.

Maybe the reason was because on Cybertron he had fought as a liberator, whilst on Earth he was doing it as a conqueror.

But he wasn't that naïve as to accept such sharp division. Adjectives didn't matter when fighting for the Decepticon cause, no matter what side of the ethics line he landed on. The cause was first. It had to be… always.

Thundercracker discreetly opened the private channel he shared with Skywarp.

"What's this all about, Warp?" he asked. "I heard Thrust saying it was a simple energy raid…"

"Then that's what it must be."

"Still, this is strange… Why are we attacking at night, when energy stations function at their minimum capacity? How much energon can we obtain under such conditions? Ten cubes?"

"I don't know any more than you, TC. All that Screamer's report said was the hour of departure."

"Don't you find it strange that only Seekers were included in this mission?"

"Perhaps Screamer wants to practice some kind of maneuver… I don't know."

Thundercracker ended the communication. He hadn't expected to obtain any useful information from Skywarp, but somehow he had felt the need to exchange empty talk with his best friend in order to minimize the loneliness he was currently feeling.

He hadn't succeeded, of course.

His com link activated again.

"TC?" he heard Skywarp asking.

"What?"

Static showed Skywarp's hesitation about continuing to speak or not. Thundercracker knew he needed some pressure.

"What is it, Warp?"

"Huh… you are alright, aren't you?"

"Alright? What are you talking about?"

Nothing but static reigned in the frequency again.

Thundercracker sighed. "Listen, if this is because of what happened with that human plane…"

"Screamer said slag and a half about you. He's wrong, right?"

"What did he say? That I am a coward? A traitor?"

"Not exactly, but…"

"I'm really surprised that you even considered his words."

More static accented the uncomfortable moment between both Seekers, but they had no time to try and find out how big the distance just established between them really was. Their private frequency was invaded by the raspy voice of Starscream.

"Target in sight! Prepare for battle!"

Thundercracker adjusted his radars. There was a military base right ahead, very close to the power station. The plan wasn't completely illogical, but the lack of a real objective continued to be evident. Was that a practice session? Was Starscream trying to test a new combat formation?

"Thundercracker, make them crawl out of their hole!" Starscream ordered.

"I don't think that will be necessary," the blue Seeker responded. His words were confirmed by the sound of alarms and the sight of hundreds of soldiers preparing their aerial defenses and their combat jets.

"Are you here to think or to obey?"

Thundercracker silently cursed Starscream, but hurried to follow his command. He placed himself at the front of the group and prepared to unleash a sonic boom.

"Prepare to execute containment maneuver four-eight!" he yelled. "Shut down audio sensors now!"

As one, the five Seekers behind Thundercracker deafened themselves momentarily. However, they could feel the powerful vibrations of the blue jet's special ability shaking the human military base.

As soon as he finished his sound attack, Thundercracker returned to his original place in the formation. His wingmates activated their audio sensors again as they flew over the shaken target.

"Maintain triangle formation! Fire on my command!" Starscream yelled as he gained altitude, momentarily flying away from the military base.

Under a normal combat situation, the protocol dictated that they attack immediately, but it seemed that Starscream had no hurry. He was toying with those humans.

Following their Air Commander, the group of Seekers fixed their course again on the target, ready to begin the carnage as soon as Starscream gave the order.

Thundercracker could barely avoid deviating from his course through pure revulsion when he saw the damages his sonic boom had left. He had unleashed a mild attack, just something to make the humans come out, but it seemed that he had overestimated the resistance of those fragile flesh creatures and their inferior technology.

The ground was all cracked, some terrestrial vehicles were overturned or on fire, dozens of humans ran erratically, preparing to defend themselves and helping others that were scattered all over the base, some of them motionless… Thundercracker hated himself.

"FIRE!"

Starscream's command was immediately obeyed. It took only one discharge from the six Decepticons to finish destroying the big esplanade beneath, at the same time colouring the night with the deadly shade of fire.

"Let's destroy the hangars!" Thrust cried, aiming toward the eight big domes that were still standing amongst the destroyed field.

"Not yet," Starscream said. "Dirge, stay with me; we will allow the human insects to climb into their puny planes and come out to play. Skywarp, you and Thrust go to the hydro-electric power station and extract as much energy as you can. Thundercracker and Ramjet, there is a civil area at quadrant eleven-seventeen. Destroy it."

"With pleasure!" Ramjet happily cried, looking forward to crashing into and destroying everything he could.

Thundercracker followed the white Conehead, unconsciously decreasing his speed. He was used to following orders and never questioning them. He was also used to keeping to himself and ignoring the onslaughts of his conscience every time he shot his weapons against a rival unable to fight with him in equal circumstances.

But at that moment he was also fighting the uncomfortable urge to disobey. But a soldier had to follow orders, that was his duty… even though he was sent to massacre innocent civilians.

"I don't want a single edifice standing or a single survivor left. Do you understand, Thundercracker?"

Thundercracker's engines roared with suffocated fury. Why had Starscream addressed him in particular? Why the charade?

Ramjet gained speed and crashed against a small building, immediately collapsing it in countless pieces. There were no soldiers inside, no weapons, no military targets… only victims.

As Ramjet started to shoot the dwellings on the streets, the past showed itself bare naked before Thundercracker. Iacon… forty thousand vorns ago. It came back to his memory banks with all the strength of a repressed memento, the one that had stayed to torture him forever because it had been the first.

It had been a fast attack, Megatron's first signal of fury, the beginning of the new age of peace and justice that would make the ancient Cybertronian Council collapse…

But Thundercracker had found no justice. Assassinating civilians hadn't been a liberating action, but the beginning of his own slavery.

Peace through tyranny, Megatron had said. And he was right, he had to be right. Megatron had lived in oppression from the same moment of his creation; he knew what it was to be treated like a working tool for others to enrich themselves, he knew what it was to see his comrades die without the right to aspire to justice, he knew what it was to be condemned to be a third class citizen without any other hope than having a portion of energon to survive the journey, he knew what it was to be a machine…

Starting a revolution had been not only a fair action, but a logical one as well. It had been meant to give a name and an insignia to Megatron's battle cry. Hunger for freedom had run through the circuits of countless Cybertronian younglings that would die for such cause… that would kill for such cause.

A flash of purple light beside him took Thundercracker away from his journey to the past.

"Don't think, TC. Just do it," Skywarp said before teleporting again, leaving behind the destructive shine of his cannons and an entire street reduced to rubbish.

It had always been that way. Skywarp had always been his anchor with unreality, the convincing word that had helped him during all those moments in which his doubts had been close to taking him to something more than only disapproving of certain methods.

Thundercracker transformed into his robotic mode and glanced downward. Just a few astro seconds had been enough to convert that small human community into a hell. Just a few astro seconds had been enough to bring Iacon back.

He descended; his feet shook the already shattered street. There were several humans still running, screaming, dragging crying sparklings behind them… There were others that would never move again.

Pathetic creatures, obviously inferior… but they were also innocent.

There is no such thing as innocence.

Once again, Megatron's words resounded in Thundercracker's memory banks. Once again, he tried to find within himself the conviction to believe in those words.

But what did it matter what he thought, at the end? Despite his beliefs, if he used his weapons against those organic beings he would be a killer, and a coward to make it worse.

The humans continued to run away from him, crying in terror, looking at him as they would have looked at a demon. They were so small and repulsive… it had to be natural to hate them.

But Thundercracker didn't hate them. His mouth twisted into a grimace of contempt directed toward himself when he lifted his incendiary gun missiles and aimed at a group of humans. He felt sorry for them… their deaths would be as unavoidable as they were useless.

"Aerialbots approaching!" Thrust radioed through the general frequency.

"Just in time. There was not a single human jet left in the air. Prepare for battle!" Starscream commanded.

Thundercracker lowered his weapons, relieved that he would fight real enemies, the kind that could fight back.

He was about to transform into his jet mode and fly toward his wingmates' location when Starscream's voice reverberated again in his com link.

"Not you, Thundercracker. Stay at your post and terminate that human settlement."

Thundercracker clenched his fists. He knew it was neither the place nor the moment, but the desire to impact his fists against his Air Commander's face had rarely been stronger. Everything was suddenly so clear that it seemed obscene. Thundercracker had been Starscream's wingmate for most of his life, but the slagger could still surprise him. His ethics functioned according to his own benefit, and nothing would stop him on his way to personal success. For Starscream, there was no difference if he killed one or a million humans just to test the loyalty of one of his subordinates. He simply lacked of any trace of mercy.

A close explosion returned Thundercracker back to Iacon. He couldn't think of two more opposite worlds than Earth and Cybertron, but in that moment they were amazingly alike. The dense smog curtains embracing the ghostly debris, the flames rising toward the dark sky, the broken organic bodies on the ground, some of them still moving… Blood or energon, the result was the same.

Thundercracker just couldn't understand the part of the equation in which all those innocent victims had to fit.

In the distance, the battle between his wingmates and the Aerialbots had started. Despite their youth and lack of real combat experience, the flying Autobots had proved to be worthy rivals. Thundercracker didn't hate them, but he battled them with all his strength because it was the right thing to do. They were powerful enemies and could fight back in equal circumstances. That's how war was supposed to be, a confrontation in which honour had to play the most important part.

But he certainly wouldn't find honour there, as he walked through the now empty streets with the mission to destroy everything that remained standing.

Something ricocheted on his knee joint. He looked downward and saw a small shine between the black fog and the flames coming from a shattered ground vehicle. A human with his face and clothes half burned was shooting him with a primitive gun. Small metallic bullets continued uselessly impacting the Decepticon's frame as the human yelled words that Thundercracker's memory banks failed to identify, certainly insults.

The Seeker frowned and aimed toward the irate human. It was a despicable little creature, that was certain… but once again the innocence of him and his race concerning the Cybertronian conflict challenged Thundercracker's ethics. Perhaps other Decepticons could find glory in vaporizing a being that didn't have the slightest chance of defending itself, but not him.

He fired. A burning hole opened very close to the human, scorching a portion of what little grass remained green, but didn't damage the creature. The strategy worked, though; the man hurried to run away, leaving his childish weapon behind.

Thundercracker adjusted his optics and proceeded to search for life signals amongst the debris. Some of the corpses beneath the destroyed dwellings still emanated small heat signals, perhaps barely functioning. It was a waste, as was every time new deaths enlarged the immense list of casualties of the Great Cybertronian War.

Some mechano miles away, the sounds of the rescue human services began to make themselves heard. It was admirable how those organic creatures risked their lives in order to try to save their comrades. It was an attitude that deserved to be respected.

And respect was something that Thundercracker wasn't currently feeling for himself. Despite the fact that he hadn't been directly responsible for the massacre before his optics, he knew his hands were as soiled as his wingmates'. As he continued to walk through the devastated streets, Thundercracker wondered about the difference between a warrior and a killer. Suddenly, the division lines were not clear anymore.

A slight movement caught his attention. A small heat signal at his left, a moan of pain… A young femme was dragging her injured body through the debris of what must have been her dwelling. Her clothes were torn in pieces, her hands covered with blood, her hair dirty with dust, her facial features deformed by anguish… But still, she was struggling to survive, to protect something that was more important than her own existence.

It was then when Thundercracker saw it. The shape of her body…

The femme was pregnant.

As every Cybertronian, Thundercracker had a basic knowledge of the reproductive cycle that most organic beings followed. Personally he considered such status exotic and repulsive, but in that moment he didn't see a simple animal fulfilling one of its life phases.

He saw a mother.

Sentient, rational, emotional… that human was trying to protect the unborn sparkling she was still carrying inside her body. She seemed not to feel the pain of her broken fingers or her non-functional legs. Apparently the desperation for saving her sparkling gave her additional strength.

Thundercracker frowned. What kind of instinct was guiding her? The affective bonds between organic beings and their offspring seemed to be as strong as the Cybetronians, perhaps even more…

He understood. He also had had a creator, someone who had given his life to protect him…

The battlefield was proving to be more intense inside of him, confronting his memories with his doubts. He had seen scenes like that in Iacon too; there too he had raised his weapons against innocents.

His arm had never felt so heavy, his weapons had never been so foreign… As he aimed towards the female human he tried to close his mind and consider her a mere target. He tried to find the coldness that was expected from him, the one that dictated he had to obey orders without second thoughts.

But it was so hard.

The only wall still left standing of what had been the femme's dwelling collapsed over her, sealing her fate and her sparkling's. In just a nano click, her life would only be a memory, all her efforts to survive useless…

Thundercracker didn't remember having ever moved so fast, not even in the moments in which such speed had saved his own life. In the eternal fraction of an astro second that followed the collapsing of the wall, many things changed, the heaviness of his arm being the most important one.

Also, his weapons had changed their status, now dangling from his arms, beginning to cool down.

Thundercracker found himself with one knee on the ground, very close to the human femme. Bathing her, as a protective angel, was the shadow of his hands.

Everything was so disturbing. He was used to following Skywarp's advice –Don't think. Just do it, - and somehow he had managed to succeed in fooling his conscience. And now he had done the same thing, acted without thinking, but this time his actions had taken him in a radically opposite direction.

He slowly retired his hands, still unable to believe what he just had done.

The female wasn't moving anymore. Had she stopped functioning?

Thundercracker didn't dare to move. What was he supposed to do now? For some reason he wanted her to live, as the sparkling inside of her…

A sound behind him made him look frantically over his shoulder. What he saw made him hate himself, suddenly remembering that he should never forget that he had a radar.

The Autobot First Aid was standing just some mechano meters away from him.

Thundercracker wondered how much the Protectobot had seen of his moment of weakness, but the answer was too obvious. First Aid had no weapon aimed against him, not even on his face could any kind of hostile intentions be read…

Thundercracker fought the instinct of shooting his enemy. He knew First Aid was the most pacifistic among the Autobots, the one that always avoided confrontations and focused his efforts on saving lives, no matter if they were artificial or organic. If there was somebody that could do something to preserve the life of the pregnant female, it was him.

"Can you save her?" Thundercracker asked before he could realize what he was saying.

First Aid didn't answer immediately, still too shocked by the scene before his optics, but approached and scanned the motionless human. Thundercracker got up and retreated a couple of steps.

"Her life signs are weak, but perhaps if…"

The com link that Thundercracker had on his wrist cracked to life and Skywarp's voice could be heard within the distant shooting.

"Hey TC, if you are done with that human settlement you better initiate retreat! The Protectobots have arrived and at least two of them are very close to your location. Are you in trouble?"

Thundercracker glanced at First Aid, who stared back at him, both realizing that the decisive moment had arrived. The Decepticon considered for the last time the option to fulfill his role and attack the Autobot, returning logic to its right place, but his enemy didn't seem to share his thoughts. There was a life at risk and that was sacred for him. Very few times had Thundercracker respected a rival so much, and this time it wasn't because of his fighting skills.

"Negative," he said, talking to his com link but with his optics fixated on First Aid. "No signal of Autobot presence at my location. I proceed to Headquarters."

First Aid was about to say something but his words were overwhelmed by the cloud of dust that Thundercracker created when he transformed. In a matter of astro clicks, he was gone.

The Protectobot hurried to transform too. The life of the young woman was priority. He would have time to question the surprising attitude of the Decepticon Seeker later.

To be continued.



As you probably noticed, I used the famous "Don't think. Just do it," line that Skywarp said when Thundercracker hesitated about attacking civilians in Megatron Origin. Even though fleeting, that moment was very meaningful and inspiring.

Next two chapters are almost done, so expect very fast updates. Please let me know your opinions :o)