AN: I have been requested to add Tsukiumi and Karasuba. My answer is: No. I have asked you to not make requests, please do not ignore that simply because you want your favorite in the harem. Thank you.

On a different note I am overwhelmed by the support this story has received so far, over 100 reviews and this is only the fourth chapter? Awesome, and I thank you all.

Shout out to my pals Mr. AnimeKidd, and ncpfan for their help and support of this story.

Disclaimer: I do not own either Naruto or Sekirei

Chapter 04

Hiroto Minaka was watching something he could not quite understand. He had viewed the security camera footage of Uzumaki Naruto's winging of Zero-Seven, and the man's subsequent escape, but something was wrong. A human shouldn't be capable of destroying the reinforced floors of his building. A human shouldn't have been able to break that bullet-proof glass with his body. And an human certainly should not have been able to make a nearly one hundred foot leap to the roof of a building across the street, then continue to run at speeds MBI's tracking satellite said was approaching eighty miles an hour.

Just what was Uzumaki Naruto? Before Zero-Seven entered that room, there had only been the janitor, a rather serious and taciturn old man called Shimura Danzo. Then Zero-Seven approached him, said something -sound, he'd have to invest in microphones, why hadn't he?- and there was a puff of smoke. Finally, when the smoke cleared, Shimura Danzo was gone, and Uzumaki Naruto stood in his place. It was like one of those old ninja movies...

Suddenly bursting into laughter, Minaka surprised his newest secretary slash assistant. A lovely young thing with orange-red hair tied in two pigtails, and a permanent blush by the name of Utatane Moegi. She was very skilled in the making of tea and the keeping of schedules. The dark blue office woman look she wore only highlighted her soft curves.

"HAHA! I have it! He's a NINJA!" Minaka's cackling was starting to become worrisome to the young woman, but then it wasn't everyday your new employer declared someone a ninja. Maybe she should add a little calming medication to his next cup? It might make him a little more tractable when she inquired about anything. Then again, it might make him even nuttier, someone had to have tried sedatives before... Right?

-Much lower in the building a gray-haired woman sneezed, before wacking a panicking employee over the head with a binder-

With a smile on her face, Moegi placed a cup of tea on the President's desk. "Your evening tea, sir. Will there be anything else?"

"Hm? No, no. That will be all for the night, Moegi-kun. Have a safe trip home." Minaka was brought out of his impromptu laughter briefly. He glanced over the young woman's form for a moment, and wished he was a younger man. 'Well hello, Sex Drive, I thought Takami killed you years ago.'

Giving a small, polite bow, Moegi turned and left the office, an unnoticed smirk gracing her lips. 'Boss is going to enjoy this.' She thought, entering the elevator just as Sahashi Takami exited it. The ride down to the lobby took a few minutes, it is the tallest building in Tokyo after all. She waved to the night-shift receptionist, exiting the building and moving away from the doors, toward a parked car. The vehicle was nothing fancy, just an old Honda CRX model, but it helped her get around and avoid suspicion from MBI.

A Kage Bunshin's gotta do what a Kage Bunshin's gotta do. At least she didn't have to bed anyone. Cue shudder. Female she may have been made, but she was still a copy of a man, if she had to bed someone, let them be another female please.

A scream of pain came to her ear just before she got in her car, and soothed her now frazzled nerves.

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Break

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Meanwhile, Minaka had grabbed the cup of tea and taken a brazen gulp of the scalding hot liquid, resulting in a furious moment of screaming in pain. Fresh tea was hot, how had he forgotten that?

Oh right, Uzumaki was a ninja. A real live ninja, someone who pulled off the impossible and make it seem commonplace. Though he had to wonder where the smoke came from, and the utterly ridiculous rapid change in clothing, not to mention the obvious make-up change from old man to young. After all, it's not like the man could mold some unheard of energy and create physical illusions to hide himself, right?

Minaka was brought out of his thoughts by the arrival of Takami, who looked like she had aged three years in the span of the day. She had taken it upon herself to try and ferret out just how in God's name, Naruto had managed to pull the wool over their eyes, and she'd had limited success.

Takami walked up in front of the desk and took the only other chair in the room. "He's a chameleon. The bastard has to be a chameleon, able to freely change his personality and give away nothing. I went over the recently hired, the ones in the past month, and nothing stands out. We received no less than two hundred applications, and hired no more than thirty as is our personal policy." She paused to take a breath, pulling out a cigarette and took a deep drag. Feeling the nicotine enter her system, Takami relaxed a little into the chair. "Not one of those thirty raised any kind of red flags, from the janitor he disguised himself as, to your new assistant. Security, technicians, receptionists, janitors, assistants and secretaries. They all come up as clean as we could ever want. Just dirty enough to have little regard for others, but with obvious ethics that keep them from being thugs."

As she blew more smoke into the air, Minaka merely hummed in amusement. "You'll likely never find any of his other persona's until he wants you too, or something like this happens again. Just from watching that video so many times I can tell you that he's a master of infiltration." His face broke into his usual manic grin. "This is proving to be so much more fun than I anticipated! This Uzumaki, he's a force of Nature, untamed and wild, truly like the meaning of his name, 'Maelstrom of the Whirlpool'."

Takami slammed her fists on the desk. "You think this is a joke?! Our security is compromised! Our secrets are vulnerable! Who knows just what he learned while he was here?! And you just laugh it off?!"

His grin never breaking, Minaka simply pointed to the data they managed to accumulate on Uzumaki Naruto from the day's events, data that was being displayed still on the giant screen. "We can infer a very great deal from what we have, Takami-kun. First, he chose the role of a janitor, likely because it had all the access requirements he'd ever need. Second, the rapid change in appearance tells us he is fully qualified in both infiltration and espionage. Third, his choice of disguise itself was too well played to be unknown to him, thus he must have used it before, or it is someone in his probably very colorful past. Fourth, we have it on record that during that little elevator ride you two shared earlier he never even bothered to look when you bent down to tie your laces. This speaks of both iron will power as a male, and possibly that he is desensitized to the female form, perhaps even capable of passing as one..." Minaka suddenly surged into motion, running for an adjacent bathroom where the sounds of a man shitting his guts out were heard, along with a very pained cry. Sounds Takami was both amused to hear, and frightened of the implications.

Minaka never ate or drank anything that was not personally prepared by his secretary, currently one Utatane Moegi. The woman had been one of those recent hirings, along with that Shimura Danzo. With that precaution there should be no reason for him to suddenly suffer from the explosive diarrhea, which the sounds and smells thereof were reaching her easily. Quickly Takami snatched up the tea cup that Minaka had been drinking from, hoping that some of the tea was still there and she'd be able to perform an analysis on it.

Fortunately it seemed there was little need for the analysis. Takami recognized the faint, and very distinct, scent of a kind of liquid medicine for children that had irregular bowel movements. Her son had that particular problem a few times when he was stressed beyond belief as a child, and she had used it on him. However this posed a new problem.

If Uzumaki could get someone like Utatane Moegi on his side, a girl barely out of college, then there was no telling who was all in his pocket. And if the girl was innocent, then how did Uzumaki get to Minaka? They put the building on lock-down until just recently. There had been no traffic in or out since the brazen exit the blonde man had pulled earlier.

Wait, what was Minaka spouting earlier? Uzumaki might be capable of passing as a woman? If that was true, then might he have also posed as a female employee earlier in the day to get to Utatane? And if that was true, how on earth did they stop him? High tech scanners had found nothing odd about "Shimura Danzo" during their mandatory physicals and blood tests.

'Ugh, hello again, Headache. I thought I might have a day without you for once.'

Nearly ten minutes later Minaka practically crawled his way out of the bathroom, clearly still suffering some fatiguing side effect. "I think, I'll be moving into that bathroom for the next several hours, Takami-kun. I believe you can handle everything while I am... indisposed."

With that he crawled right back into the recently vacated bathroom, closed the door, and probably wouldn't be heard from again for the foreseeable future. Takami could only sweatdrop and look at the displayed data again.

Uzumaki was lucky in one way so far, the two Sekirei he had winged didn't have any kind of tracking units, the best they had were the warning systems to detect being winged. Takami was going to have to make sure that no others left their custody without one. Should this blonde man get any Sekirei, which seemed highly likely considering he had wing two supposedly unwingable Sekirei, they'd at least have an idea where he might be.

Hopefully.

With the way things were going at the moment, Takami wouldn't put it past him to somehow either short-circuit the tracker or remove it without her knowledge. She'd only known of the Uzumaki Naruto for a month, and she was already placing her bets on his doing more of the impossible. He seemed to have a penchant for it. As a result she had the feeling that her life was going to be filled with even bigger headaches.

Poor woman. She had no idea.

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Break

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The morning following his winging of Akitsu found Naruto waking in his and Miya's bed, with the feeling of two female bodies pressed up against him, one to each side. Blinking, he looked to his left and found Miya's head resting on his shoulder, his arm drawn around her shoulders, her usual sleeping yukata firmly in place. Okay, that was normal these days. Now for the other ... side...

Uh-oh.

On his right was Akitsu, her head nestled into the crook of his neck, his arm held in her generous cleavage by both of her hands... and she was naked. How could he tell? She wasn't under the sheets, so he had a completely unrestricted view. Where was the sleeping yukata that Miya loaned her? Why was she here when she had been given a room right next door? And why, for the love of Kami, did he not notice her joining them in bed?!

Then there was what Miya was going to do to him when she woke up. He may not necessarily fear his "wife", but he didn't want her angry at him. Besides, even if she were to try and harm him, he was old-fashioned enough that he wouldn't want to hurt her in retaliation.

Not physically, at least. Hitting her pride would do just as well.

In the meantime, he had to get out of this situation without notice... Oh would you look at that, Miya was awake.

Fuck.

"Uh, Good... morning?" Naruto's tone was anything but his usual chipper self. He didn't want to deal with that damned Hannya mask this early, even if he could ignore it. The thing just spelled ruin to his day.

Miya's gaze was flinty, flickering back and forth between his face and Akitsu's position. Then she seemed to relax with a sigh of what he could have sworn was resignation. "She came in after you were asleep. I thought this might happen eventually, so I allowed her to join us... but I could have sworn she was wearing that yukata I gave her."

Naruto blinked in confusion. "That's interesting Miya, but I have a couple questions of my own, like why you aren't trying to kill me, and why I didn't wake up when she joined us."

"Oh, those? I'm not trying to kill you because it's hardly your fault that Akitsu wanted to be so close, and I allowed it in the first place. As to why you didn't wake up... I hit a few points in your neck that kept you in sleep." Miya's answers were crisp and clear, not the kind of things he'd expect from a woman who just woke. Meaning she had been awake as long as he had, if not longer.

Well that was one less worry. Now if only he could feel safe enough to try leaving the bed. Waking to two beautiful women on his arms may be the dream of most men, but Miya was making enjoying it somewhat awkward or terrifying.

Really it was something of a toss up.

Then Miya smiled coldly. "But know that if anything lewd happens, you , my dear husband, will be skipping a fair number of meals in the future."

Anime-style waterfall tears escaped his eyes. "Yes, Miya." Almost immediately followed with quick devilish grin and peck on her cheek, bringing a light rosy hue to her face alongside a small smile.

"Ah... Jealous." Apparently Akitsu had awoken sometime during their conversation and saw the kiss, prompting Naruto give her one as well.

"Ara, good morning, Akitsu. Pray tell, where is the yukata I loaned you last night?" Miya's sweet voice was tinged with annoyance. She had given Akitsu that yukata because the poor woman had nothing else, save for that short medical robe.

"Ah... Uncomfortable. Took it off after coming to bed." Akitsu's monotone delivery made it hard to continue being annoyed. How can you stay mad at someone who simply stated the facts? It would be beyond illogical, and Miya was anything but illogical.

Slipping free of the two women, 'never thought I'd be adverse to just laying around with two beautiful women', Naruto quickly moved to a large wardrobe and began dressing for the day. "Alright, you two, we have things to do today, so you're going to have to get dressed. I'll start making breakfast while you get ready." Cinching a belt into place he headed for the kitchen, he had food to make.

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Break

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After breakfast, the three of them headed out, Akitsu once again wearing the same light blue kimono from the previous night. Naruto felt as though he was something of a quandary though. One beautiful woman on each of his arms, walking down the street towards the main shopping district of the north end of Tokyo. Both women looking as though he was their primary reason for even being alive with insipid expressions upon their flawless faces.

When did Miya learn to prank? And how did she get Akitsu to go along with it?

On that note, he felt extremely proud of her at that moment. Miya had discovered the pleasure of making others uncomfortable early in her relationship with Takehito, presumably from the inestimable man himself, but now she was learning the fine art of trolling people. Yes, Uzumaki Naruto was very proud of his new wife, and his new concubine? How exactly was he supposed to classify Akitsu?

A Sekirei is one's "destined" life partner. He had two Sekirei, thus he had two life partners. A life partner is often referred to as a wife. Therefore, he had two wives? And it was possible for him to get more.

Naruto had the sudden urge to run screaming for the ever elusive hills, even though he knew it wouldn't do him any good. He might be a master of stealth, but the Bond made it virtually impossible to hide from Miya, and now there was Akitsu... Yeah, running would be pointless.

Fun? Perhaps, but pointless. In the end they'd find him, and he'd feel guilty for one reason or another, or until they dragged it out of him, and he'd just be worse than if he'd accepted it in the first place...

Oh, they'd arrived at the clothing store. Well now it was too late to even contemplate running, so he might as well suck it up. Besides, just how bad could it be? It was clothes, right?

-The author would like to take this moment to say: NAIVE DUMBASS!-

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Break

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Four hours later and Naruto was certain that clothes shopping had been invented by women to torture the men in their lives. Six stores, at least forty different outfits ranging from extremely conservative, to outright NO! Akitsu was trying pretty much everything, and Naruto's reputation was taking a nosedive with the general female population of each store. Especially the lingerie store... And here he had thought Akitsu liked him.

That store didn't even sell fundoshi!*

Finally Akitsu settled on a white kimono, with chains as accessories, that revealed a good portion of her cleavage and her shoulders, tied with a black obi, the chains seemingly being used to keep her top from simply falling off. Naruto and Miya were pleased with the fact she had chosen something that she wanted to wear, though Miya tried to get her into "less lewd" clothes. Ah, whatever, Naruto was happy. The view was gorgeous, even Miya's glare -as if it was his fault Akitsu picked that outfit- couldn't drop his spirits.

Now if only he could get Miya into some of those earlier outfits. Her current miko-style was good, but Naruto couldn't help wishing he could have seen her in that one bikini... Wishful thinking, he knew it, but a man can hope.

-Keep dreaming, Bud, you're in for a long, long wait-

Then there had been that lingerie store, what a nightmare! Or should that have been a wet dream? Naruto couldn't make up his mind, but he and Miya had found out something interesting about Akitsu there. Apparently her skin was rather sensitive in general, and anything less than silk was aggravating, so for her underwear she had gone with simple white garments. Tasteful, elegant, and somehow very erotic.

Naruto was still wondering just how she pulled off that kind of air wearing what amounted to little more than nearly-transparent fabric. It should just be erotic, right? But for some reason Akitsu managed an air of stately innocence.

HOW?!

-Good question... It's Akitsu?... Yeah, I got nothin'... and I'm the author?... retirement sounds good right about now.-

Naruto blinked and scratched the back of head. "Why do I suddenly get the feeling I've been abandoned by Kami?"

Miya giggled softly into one of her sleeves. "Ara, Naruto-kun, I have no idea what you might be talking about. We two lovely young women are your wives, why would we want to harm you? Or humiliate, or subject you to ..."

"I get the idea." He held up one hand to interrupt her. Really, where did she get some of these ideas? On second thought, he didn't want to know. "What say we go home? We've got everything we set out for, right?"

Miya hummed in thought. While it was true that they had everything they had set out to get, she just didn't feel as though Naruto had suffered enough for getting another Sekirei only a month after winging her.

Oh, Miya knew he would get more, it was a given as he had winged her as his first. The question would be just how many? If he wound up winging the lot of them -unlikely, but possible- she'd probably give up all pretenses and just lock him in a cell somewhere, and feed him through a small slat. Naruto was her husband/Ashikabi! ... Well, her's and Akitsu's, but that didn't mean she wanted to share him with all one hundred and seven of her "siblings".

Miya found herself fervently praying he didn't wing someone she couldn't stand, like Karasuba. Even just thinking it, the woman's name was filled with venom, enough to possibly kill a human. There was, quite literally, only one person Miya detested more, and that was Minaka.

"Miya, Miya, ya in there?" Naruto was waving his hand in front of her face. He had asked if they could go home, and Miya had blanked out, which was very un-Miya-like behaviour. Could she be lost in thought? "ITAI!" Okay, maybe she was just luring him into a false sense of security long enough to hit him over the head with that ladle... WHERE DID SHE KEEP THAT?! Wait, better question: why did she have that?

A woman of many mysteries, is our dear Miya.

Clearing her throat, Miya put on a beatific smile. "Now, since we have everything, we probably should go home. I have to start lunch soon, and knowing my Ashikabi, he's probably hungrier than anyone else around."

A growl sounding from Naruto's stomach answered her statement. She had known him for little more than a month, and already knew his stomach better than he did... Akitsu found herself jealous, and latched onto Naruto's left arm. She may not have known him for as long, but her feeling for her new-found Ashikabi, her Beloved, were just as strong as Miya's, if not stronger.

As they walked home Miya reflected on the two impossible wingings that Naruto had managed. First there was Miya, herself. The Pillar, Sekirei Zero-One, the -technically- most powerful Sekirei. There truly should not have been a man out there that could wing her, but her Naruto was not just any man. He was apparently some sort of time/space traveler, if an unwilling one. This factor seemed to allow him to break the "rules" of the Sekirei Crest.

Then there was Akitsu, Sekirei Zero-Seven, the Ice Sekirei, The Broken Sekirei, The "Scrapped Number". Once again, there shouldn't have been a man -or woman- alive that could bring her Bond to fruition. But Naruto... Naruto had done it. Akitsu had such a powerful reaction that even in her state of half-Bond* she could follow his "feel" and find him.

A half-Bond was a dangerous thing. It represented a Sekirei who knew their Ashikabi, and would accept no other. This eventually lead to a degradation of the Sekirei Tama, or core, which lead to the Sekirei practically bursting apart from the inside as they obsessed with the Ashikabi they knew existed, but could not find. They entered a state of extreme depression, and could conceivably convince themselves that another person was their Ashikabi, if the desperation had become strong enough.

Miya shuddered. She was glad Akitsu had managed to escape that fate.

Basically, the half-Bond was when the Sekirei marked themselves as taken, the Crest appearing upon the forehead, even without having found their Ashikabi. It was more symbolic than anything, unless the reaction was powerful enough. Akitsu's Crest had appeared, if Miya remembered correctly, about six years ago... Around the time that Naruto entered their world!

Startled, Miya's gaze suddenly swept to her Ashikabi's face. He had affected the Sekirei even back then? Come to think of it, Miya had tried being winged by Takehito around the same time... 'Oh my God! Could Naruto-kun's arrival have been purposely timed to ruin the Sekirei? To change our previous destinies? Would he really do something like that?'

Her shock must have reverberated down the Bond, because Naruto turned a concerned gaze to Miya. "Is everything alright?"

Shaking her head, Miya smiled. What was she thinking? Of course Naruto wouldn't do that. She had the memories of that frantic battle in his world. "No, everything's just fine, Naruto-kun. Just thinking about some things."

The concern didn't leave his gaze, but he did manage to give a smile in return. "If you say so."

The remainder of their trip back to Izumo was done in content silence, each of Naruto's Sekirei attaching themselves to one of his arms, after he had used a sealing scroll to put away all of the new clothing, groaning as he saw the interested gleam in Miya's eyes. He just knew that he was going to be her pack mule even more than usual now for groceries.

Funny thing was, he discovered he didn't really mind, so long as his Miya was happy.

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Break

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Upon arriving at Izumo they discovered two people waiting for them at the door, a young-looking man with gray hair, and a young woman with orange hair. At least Naruto thought the one person was male... Maybe he should call them an amoeba? This person looked male-ish, but had a definitive female vibe. It was very confusing. Maybe they were hiding their gender?

The other, definitely female, was much easier for him to recognize. Utatane Moegi, his female Kage Bunshin that was currently holding the placement of Minaka's secretary. What was she doing here? She wasn't supposed to make contact with him at all, as it could implicate her as one of his "compatriots".

Nodding to the orange-haired Kage Bunshin, Naruto cleared his throat. "Moegi, while it's nice to see you, who is this, and why are they with you?"

Moegi suddenly seemed incredibly nervous, if her fidgeting in place was anything to go by. "Well, you see Boss, it's ... well you wouldn't believe me if I told you, so maybe I should just dispell?" He just fixed her with a gimlet stare. "Right, I didn't think so. Well this is Homura, Sekirei Zero-Six, and she-he, What do I classify you as?!" Moegi shouted to the person standing beside her.

Homura blinked, and shrugged before answering in a non-gender specific voice. "I'm kind of in a transitional stage, so either one works. If it helps I will be female in a little less than a week."

Moegi sighed heavily. "Fine, she hid in the back of my car this evening when I was leaving work, and when I discovered her -too late, I might add-, she practically begged me to take her some place safe. Since this is the only place I could think of, I brought her here."

The sound of a throat being cleared brought their attention to Miya and Akitsu, who wore identical blank expressions. When one of them finally spoke, it was Miya's calm tone, which was somehow very scary. "Naruto-kun, who is this, and how do you know her?"

"Um, she's a Kage Bunshin of mine that I left behind to monitor Minaka, and prank him at intermittent intervals?" Naruto couldn't quite keep the questioning tone out of his voice. He was going to explain everything over lunch, honest! ... Okay, it may have slipped his mind.

'I never thought I'd need this, but it seems necessary:Jiraiya's Second Ultimate Jutsu: BULLSHIT YOUR ASS OFF!'

"I was so distracted by the beauty of my two ladies I couldn't concentrate and wound up forgetting... and you aren't buying a word I said, are you?" A shake of the head was the answer he received. Naruto sighed. "Oh well, no one ever believed Jiraiya either." His shoulders slumped as he resigned himself to being berated, but all he got was... a hug?

Slightly confused, Naruto looked up to come eye-to-eye with Akitsu. 'Heh, even if her face doesn't have a great amount of expression, she does care.' A quick kiss to his lips from the ice-wielder broke his thoughts, and he was suddenly very glad that everyone there was either a Sekirei or him -Kage Bunshin or not- as her wings appeared.

Akitsu lay her head gently against his shoulder, a silent testimony to her support. In Akitsu's eyes, Naruto could do no wrong. He was her Ashikabi, her husband, her destiny. She would never doubt him, never question him, and she hoped to never disappoint him. Akitsu was still a little afraid that this was all either a dream or a cruel joke, it was too wonderful, and if Naruto rejected her for whatever reason... Well it wouldn't end pretty.

Naruto felt Akitsu's fear, and -temporarily forgetting the others- he hugged her tightly, whispering softly into her ear. "It's okay, Akitsu. It's alright, you're here, I'm here, and I'm not letting go. There's nothing to fear, my Akitsu."

Akitsu shivered, her emotions clearing. She knew he was right, he was her Ashikabi, he wouldn't lead her astray. For these reasons, and more, Naruto's words calmed Akitsu like nothing else, and for a moment she reveled in the emotions she could feel traveling down the Bond from him.

Naruto looked over Akitsu's head to his first Sekirei. Miya had an understanding and happy smile, she knew Akitsu was going to have difficulty believing in her wings. The young woman had been broken, Naruto had fixed that, winged her, and set everything right within Akitsu. It wasn't the kind of thing that could be put behind you easily.

The sound of a clearing throat startled all of them into remembering Homura and Moegi. Turning back around they saw Homura looking somewhat uncomfortable, and Moegi grinning. "Ah, sorry about that, Homura was it? You said you were looking for a safe place, well from what I was told, Izumo will always welcome those who need a place to go."

"I couldn't have said it better, Naruto-kun" Miya stepped up beside him, drawing his left arm around her shoulders. "Welcome to Maison Izumo, Homura."

"Please, call me Kagari.* I'll be using that from now on."

"As you wish, Kagari. Now then, rent is fifty-thousand a month, three meals are included in the price, as well as bath facilities. I'll wave the first month for now, until you can pay it, Naruto-kun has given us plenty for the time being that we can easily afford an extra mouth. Now, I'll show you to a room. There are only two rules I have here, no illicit or lewd actions, and no fighting within these walls, am I clear?" Miya's tone never changed from her pleasant start, but near the end her Hannya manifested itself, unnerving the newly-named Kagari.

"Ah, yes. Understood." Kagari would say just about anything right now to get rid of that mask!

As the group entered the Inn, Moegi left for her car. She had to get back to her cover apartment quickly, and hope that MBI hadn't bothered noticing her little side trip. If they did, she may have to pull a disappearing act, by running and dispersing herself. Oh well, such were the dangers of under cover work.

Just as Naruto and the others were removing their footwear, a red and white blur came rushing down the stairs, and barreled right into him. It was Matsu, and she was staring up at him in adoration, while holding something he had fervently hoped Miya would never see. Something small, square, and orange.

"Naruto-sama! SENSEI! Please, teach me the ways of the Super Pervert!" Matsu's voice was filled with nothing short of adulation, while Naruto suddenly broke out into a cold sweat.

Miya's instant response was another Hannya, with a chill in her voice that would make the North Wind sit up and take notes. "Naruto-kun, just what does she mean by that?"

'When in doubt, deny, deny, DENY!' "I have no idea what she's talking about." He said with an absolutely straight face.

Matsu held up the book so it's title was easily read: Icha Icha Paradise, Hotspring Love. "I went out briefly today, disguised of course, and found this on the racks in the local bookstore. I noticed it said 'Adults Only', and figured 'why not?' When I got home, I opened it and discovered it was truly a work of the purest art! Plot, romance, SEX!" Here Matsu broke for a moment to giggle in a perverted manner. "I just had to know who wrote this piece of perfection! So I looked up the given author, Jiraiya, only to discover it was a fake name with no known ties! So I backtracked to when the series was first started, and found a pattern, hacked the publisher's cameras, and found out our own Naruto was the true author!"

Her proud declaration was met with absolute silence. Even the Hannya mask was caught by surprise. Don't ask how. Four sets of eyes turned in shock to Naruto.

"Would it help matters if I said I didn't write them? They really are the works of a man called Jiraiya, who used his dying wish to guilt me into keeping them in circulation." The flat stare, coupled with the deadpan delivery and complete honesty, was probably what saved him as the Hannya mask dissolved and an understanding look entered everyone's eyes. "Coincidentally, those books are what paid for today's shopping, the past month's bills, and probably the coming years as well."

Miya's expression went from understanding to floored, her jaw making intimate acquaintance with the ground. THIS was his method of making that obscene amount of money?! She had checked his wallet -a cute little frog pouch- once, and found it filled to almost bursting with high-numbered currency. Were the men of the human race truly so pathetic that they needed to buy this little book to get by?

Seeing her reaction, Naruto couldn't help but grin and go in for the proverbial kill. "Oh, and I asked the publisher to keep track on the gender ratio for buyers, and women outnumber men by nearly four to one. Apparently these books contain most of their personal fantasies."

And there was the smoke he was looking for, pouring from the broken mind of Miya. Poor woman, didn't even realize she was part of the minority now. Then he caught sight of Akitsu reading the book with her blank face, and became worried. If she was to try and emulate any of those scenes... Time to make a strategic retreat.

Clearing his throat, he grabbed Kagari by the shoulders and turned her around, pushing her toward the stairs. "How's about I show our new tenant to a room, and you get lunch started Miya?"

The two were already gone by time Miya's unfocused nod completed and she was already moving toward to kitchen. Could this day get any stranger?

-Please, Miya, don't ask that.-

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Break

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Sahashi Takami found herself in the unique position of being unable to focus. This had never happened before. She had a feeling about that Utatane Moegi, and had her car watched via satellite. Takami was hardly surprised when the woman had pulled into a small parking space to one side of Maison Izumo, known home of Uzumaki Naruto. What did surprise her though, was when Zero-Six Homura followed Utatane out of the car, when did he get there? He was supposed to be in the lab, resting during a transition period.

Zero-Six, Homura, was a fascinating subject, the only Sekirei with the ability to change gender based on their Ashikabi's preference. However, just because he was turning female didn't necessarily mean his Ashikabi was male. The unknown person he was reacting to could very well be female with a taste for other women, as in the case of Number Ten and her Ashikabi. But that wasn't the sticking point.

Takami had been correct in thinking that Utatane worked for Uzumaki, but the continued mystery surrounding the man made her pause before telling Minaka. She could use this, his connection to Utatane, to get more information on him. The only problem with that would be keeping this information out of Minaka's hands. Gods only knew what that madman would do with it.

With that in mind, Takami saved a copy of the video file to her personal tablet, and deleted all traces of it from the mainframe. Only time would tell if this was a stroke of stupidity or brilliance.

She had the uncomfortable feeling that she was very like Minaka at the moment.

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Ending Notes

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And so Homura has arrived at Maison Izumo! And already in the transitional stage between male and female. This is going to change things a fair bit, wouldn't you all agree? And what's wrong with Takami? Read and find out!

*Fundoshi, for those who don't know, is the Japanese loincloth. And for the record, I'm fairly certain no shop sells them... I could be wrong about that though.

*Half-Bond: something I made up for the purpose of this fic. You still don't know what it is? Re-read the chapter. It's in there.

*As far as I'm aware, Kagari is a gender-neutral name. As such I do not feel the need to think up something else.