Understand 4

By the time Raph had gotten home it was long past midnight. The lair was dark with only the light coming from the the most have retired, for there was no noise from the lab, tv, or dojo.

Strange.

Leo would normally be up waiting for Raph's return, a lecture coming out by the time Raph would make it to the bathroom.

They're scared of you.

With a sigh, Raph made his way to the bathroom to clean up the few wounds he had received from his night out, and with that done, he went strait to the kitchen for something to eat, since he had missed dinner.

Once in the kitchen Raph made his way to the fridge finding it completely bare of any food that he would eat. The food was anything but healthy. With the left over pizza, old take out and junk food it looked as if that was all they ever lived off of.

With a slight frown on his face, Raph decided a cup of tea would at least put him a bit at ease. He wouldn't normally drink the stuff, but when he did it would always bring him peace of mind.

Filling the kettle with water, Raph placed it onto the stove. He would only drink a few types of tea. Black, chai, or the nectar tea he could never remember the name of.

Knowing the only tea they had in the lair that he liked at the time was Black tea, he pulled out a bag and cup for when the water was good and hot.

Sitting down at the table, as he waited for the water, Raph's mind began to wander to thoughts about his brothers.

They thought him a monster, that was clear. But what if he could take away that monster and replace it with something a lot less threatening?

An idea hit. He knew how to fix everything for his family.

For if he was the one to cause such an imbalance in their lives, he would simply take himself out of the equation. Not completely though. He would still go to practice, and family meals, but other then that he would just not be there. If he wasn't there to cause a fight or an out burst then the family would fall into a calm, peace.

It would be best this way, he knew it. But would it be enough? No, not entirely. He would miss their company, helping them with problems, and simply just being there for them.

Even if they don't want you?

There is another option. While he would leave them be in everyday occurrences, he would secretly help them with small problems. A sort of penance for all that they had done for him.

Because if he could find anyway to pay them back for putting up with him, then he would by any means possible.

Steam rose from the kettle so he quickly snatched it off the burner, not wanting it to wake anyone with its whistle.

Pouring the water into his cup, Raph placed the tea bag in and scooped the sugar, while stirring.

His brothers may not know much about him, but he knew everything about them.

He knew that Mikey may be goofy, fun loving and happy, but that he could be deadly serious if the occasion ever occur ed, and could have great courage when he was faced with a challenge. Raph knew Mikey was the light to their small family.

He knew that Don was smart, loved machines, could solve any problem if he could use his brain and logic, and that he was the most sensitive.

Raph also knew that when it really came down to it, without Don they probably wouldn't have made it as far as they had in life. He was always there for them with the answers and gadgets that could help them through anything.

Then there was Leo. He knew Leo thought hecouldn't possibly understand him, but in truth he knew more about Leo then he probably knew about himself.

Leo was leader, big brother, always seemed to have a stick up his ass, and was extremely possessive over his family. He always followed their Master's teachings and never argued with him.

But then there was the other things. Leo may be all of that, but when you really looked you could see the dedication and love he put into everything. He wasn't perfect, no, and Raph knew this. Raph knew that if Leo could be perfect then he would never stop.

Raph knew Leo well.

This is the reason for many of his arguments with Leo. Raph challenged Leo to his fullest. He would push Leo until he would ultimately realise where he had gone wrong and improve. This is how Raph helped him, but now it seemed that with him helping Leo, he had pushed to far and had lost his bond.

"Its always a fight with him! always arguments that lead to more fights!"

And friendship.

He knew his brothers well. Why didn't they know him? Was he that hard to figure out?

Raph knew he was guarded, he kept his emotions hidden behind his anger. But in truth, his heart was worn on his sleeves. You could always tell when he was bothered or upset.

This is why his heart was his weakness, for he loved them to much.

Glancing down at his now cold tea, Raph dumped it into the sink with a sigh. Heading up the stairs to his room he glanced around his home, everything was the same as it had always been. Now he would make it better, for his family.

Opening his door, Raph stepped inside, closing it behind him. His room...the place that allowed escape when the rooftops were not an option, where he could read and forget. Where he could sleep, and hope it to be dreamless.

He would do anything for his family. Even if it meant destroying his heart to do so.