Disclaimer: See previous chapters. I'm too tired to think up anything clever to put here. :-P
Alright, so I'm beginning to wonder if there really is a plot after all! This chapter hit me like a ton of bricks, and everything fell into place so nicely that I gave up on plot for now. We'll see about future chapters, though. Nothing's set in stone. Well, some things are…
Spoilers include Victoria's Secret, The Deal, and Juliet is Bleeding.
Once they had finished eating, Ray set Fraser and Dief up on the living room couch. He would have offered Francesca's room, but both men knew that it was out of the question. Fraser could only think of how Victoria had stayed there briefly, but Ray was more concerned with the fact that if his sister found out the Mountie had slept in her room… Well, she would never wash her bed sheets again.
Heading slowly up the stairs, Ray's hand strayed to his presently rotund stomach. Ma certainly outdid herself tonight, he mused as he struggled into his striped pajamas. He let his waistline hang a little lower than usual and tried to convince himself that he would be more comfortable that way – but the sad truth was that the trousers weren't fitting all that well tonight. Mental note – take Fraser out and play some basketball tomorrow.
When was the last time he'd really played? Reviewing his memory, Ray pulled the clip from his gun and prepared to lock it in his nightstand – the usual nightly routine. Shock jolted through him as something surfaced, and he nearly dropped the weapon. Basketball…
We go back a long way you and me, Frankie. And we've got some unfinished business to attend to. Zuko. Ray closed his eyes and wondered if he would ever be rid of the man. He started to smile as he remembered how good it felt to break the bastard's nose – see him cowering in fear. But his mind didn't stop there.
You never listen…
"No," Ray ground his teeth in an effort to forget, but as always, he failed. He had yelled at Zuko – probably pushed him too far. But he wasn't going to let Irene stay in that house with a murderer, especially not when he'd just threatened to kill her, too. Ray clasped his head in his hands, wishing for the millionth time that he could undo that entire week. He felt the heat of his car exploding – the weight of Gardino's coffin. When he closed his eyes he could see Irene. She was happy; smiling. Until she looked down. Her expression became stunned as she found herself bleeding, and she collapsed in Ray's arms.
That nightmare had haunted him for weeks.
Ray's breathing became shallow as he roughly tossed his gun in the drawer and locked it. He didn't even bother to pull the key out. He just sat there, rocking, as he ran a hand through his hair.
Thanks to his stupidity, two people had died. They had deserved better from him – but he had been unable to control himself. Welsh was always saying that his temper was gonna get him killed one of these days. Tonight, Ray wished he was right, and that it had been him in that casket. At least that way Irene and Gardino would still be alive. Blinking against the burning tears, Ray pinched the bridge of his nose and took a deep breath.
It was an accident, he had said. But he knew he was the one to blame. Ray bit the inside of his cheek and fought the urge to punch his pillow. Damn it, he thought, I can't do this right now. Benny needs me. Unable to withstand the tide of grief any longer, and unwilling to reflect on his failure, the detective practically ran from the room. Maybe I'll go down to the basement and play some pool.
Ray crept silently downstairs. The sound of running water caught his attention, and he peered in the kitchen to find Fraser scrubbing away at the evening's accumulation of dishes. Ray didn't make a sound, but the Mountie knew he was there – as always.
He spoke without turning. "Everything alright, Ray?"
"Yeah," the detective lied as he walked up to the sink. "Just couldn't sleep." He grabbed a hand towel and started drying a stack of plates. Fraser looked over at Ray and was shocked to find haunted eyes staring back. Ben didn't know what was bothering his friend, but he knew better than to bring it up now. Keeping his face neutral, Fraser nodded.
"Me, too," he said simply.
So… What did ya think? My muse decided it was time for mindless dribble from Ray!
