Chapter Three. Pirates Again

"So you want to join us?" Greil said to Lenora.

"Yep, I don't have anywhere else to go and I'm good at sword fighting and at using the spells of my sword."

"All right, then. You're in."

"Really?"

"Yes. We could use another addition to our band. Welcome, Lenora, to the Greil Mercenaries."

"Ha-ha. Cool. So now I'm a mercenary…"

"'So now I'm a mercenary'?"

"Well, I've drifted all over the place, but I've never been quite satisfied. Don't ask me why. I've been an assassin, a messenger, a freelancer. I sure hope I'll find mercenary life satisfying."

"Well, what is it that you seek in life?"

"Umm…that's personal."

"All right. Mist."

"Yeah, Dad?" Mist got up from the chair that she was sitting in.

"Take Lenora to one of the spare bedrooms."

"Okay. Follow me, Lenora." said Mist as she led Lenora out of the briefing room. Ike, Boyd, Oscar, and Rhys were waiting outside. "Dad's ready to talk to you all." she said to them. All four of the mercenaries nervously entered the room and Ike was hyperventilating. "I hope he doesn't punish them too severely. After all, they just wanted to save Rolf and I from those bandits." and so Mist and Lenora conversed as Mist led Lenora to her room. "Here it is," she said, "it's right next to Rhys's room. And the one across from your room is Ike's and Soren's room."

"Okay. Thank you, Mist."

"You're welcome. I'll leave you to be settled into your room."

"All right. I'll see you later." Lenora watched Mist leave down the hallway and then she opened the heavy oaken door. Her bed was in the northwest corner of the room. And in the northeast corner was a writing desk with a window above it. The window had closed wooden shutters so she couldn't see what was outside. There was a dresser in the southeast corner of the room and a shelf in the southwest corner. Lenora put her bag on her bed and began to unpack her things. Ten minutes later she opened the window and saw Ike, Gatrie, and Shinon standing outside of the building next to the briefing room. "Hello!" she called to them.

"Hi, Lenora! We're about to go on a mission. Titania went to go get you."

"Okay. I'll just wait for her, then!" Lenora closed the window and crouched down next to the door. Just then, someone knocked on it. "Come in!" she merrily said. Titania opened the door and Lenora jumped up and screamed, "BLAAAAAHHHHHHH-HA-HA-HA-HAAAAAAAAWWWWW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!'

"AH!!!" Titania yelled and punched Lenora.

"Ouch!"

"Oh, no! Lenora, are you all right?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine… At least I got you to scream!"

"Sigh… Looks like we have another cheerful addition to the band. Well, I came here to tell you that we're going on a mission."

"Already? So what's the mission?"

"We need to drive out a gang of pirates at Port Talma."

"Okay." Lenora followed Titania out to where Ike, Shinon, and Gatrie were waiting.

"What happened? I heard yelling." queried Gatrie.

"Lenora is a prankster." Titania simply replied.

"I jumped and screamed when Titania opened the door and she punched me." said Lenora.

"Ha! That's what you get for being an idiot like Boyd." said Shinon.

"Let's get going." Titania said as she got onto her horse.

The five mercenaries neared Port Talma and an elderly man approached them. "Greetings," said Titania, "we are of the Greil Mercenaries and we've come to rid you of those pirates. That's the pirate ship in question, isn't it?"

"Aye. They sailed into port a few days ago and have been causing trouble ever since. I pray that you and your companions can drive them away. Umm… Why is there a child with you?"

"What'd you say, old man?" Lenora retorted.

"Lenora!" Titania sternly said.

"What?"

"No."

"Urgh. Okay, I'll shut-up."

"Don't underestimate Lenora. She is skilled for her age and we will all do what we can to defeat these pirates." The old man nodded in response and went inside his house.

"Feathering sea scum is like shooting apples off a tree. Let's do the job and get out of here." said Shinon.

"Ho, Deputy Commander! You want standard thunder and lightning maneuvers here?" asked Gatrie.

"Er… Thunder and lightning?" Ike asked.

"Yeah! I crash into 'em like thunder, and Shinon rains arrows down on 'em like lightning!"

"Sounds good." said Titania.

"All right, then! Let's get this party started!" Lenora said, then she drew her sword and charged at the pirates.

"Whoa, hold up!" exclaimed Ike as he grabbed Lenora's arm.

"Hey, what's the big deal?"

"We need to wait for Titania's orders."

"Oh… Sorry, it's just I'm not used to taking orders-but I'll remember to next time."

"Good. Okay, this is our strategy," Titania was saying, "Gatrie and Shinon with go first…and you will go with them, Lenora. Ike, you and I will go in second. Hurry, you three. About two pirates are coming this way."

"Right!" said Gatrie as he, Shinon, and Lenora met the two pirates.

"Ike, when they kill those two, we'll go and fight, too."

"Okay!" After about a half an hour, the mercenaries and the pirates that were in the port were scattered. Ike was still near the entrance of the town, and a pirate that was too powerful for him was chasing him around. So Ike yelled, "Hey! Look at that giant white bird!" He yelled as he pointed at a pink-haired pegasus rider who flew at the pirate ship. The stupid pirate stared at the pegasus rider, giving Ike the chance to escape into the nearest building without him noticing. Ike came across a man with long, wavy, silver-blue hair.

"You're a pirate, aren't you?"

"No! No, I'm not! Don't look at me like that!!!" Ike shrieked.

"You are a pirate, aren't you?"

"No I'm not, you creep!"

"…Creep? Did you just call me a creep?"

"I sure did!"

"You little mutha-"

"OH MY GOSH A PIRATE GOT INSIDE!!!!!!!!!!!" a villager who entered the room screamed. "You know what, take this!" and he threw a bottle of elixir at Ike's head.

"Ouch!" Ike caught the bottle and put it in his purse-I mean-little bag that was on his belt. "Ha-ha! Suckers!" Ike ran out of the house with his loot.

Meanwhile, Lenora and Gatrie were battling an especially tough pirate. "Arghh! Die, already, will ya?!" Lenora fired a volley of ice blades at the pirate.

"Avast! A sea wench!" The pirate rasped as he dodged all of the ice blades except for one.

"What did you say?" Lenora asked him.

"What did ye say, ye scurvy wench?"

"What!?"

Gatrie sighed and said, "Lenora, he's calling you a stupid girl and Pirate, she's askin' what ye said to 'er!"

"Oh! Now I get it!" said Lenora.

"Aye! Now I be understandin' the wench!" said the pirate. Just then Titania came galloping over to them.

"Don't worry!" she said, "I'll help you two out!"

"And so will Frederick!" Exclaimed Ike as he climbed over the roof with Frederick in his hand.

"IKE!!!" Titania thundered.

"What!?"

"YOU CRAP-DAMNED IDIOT, YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE BRINGING THAT STUPID THING WITH YOU!!!!! IF YOU BRING FREDRICK-I mean- THAT STUPID RUBBER CHICKEN WITH YOU ON A MISSION ONE MORE TIME I WILL GNAW YOUR HEAD OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!! NOW PUT THAT STUPID THING DOWN AND HELP SHINON!!!!!!!!"

"Okay!" And so Ike threw Frederick at Shinon and started tap-dancing.

"IKE, YOU IMBECILE!!!" Shinon shouted, "WHAT THE FUCK DO THINK A RUBBER CHICKEN IS GOING TO DO FOR ME?!?!?!?!?!?!?!" Ike was still tap-dancing and Titania went to go help Shinon fight off the enemies that were ganging up on him. By this time, the pink-haired girl had taken interest in the wacky group of mercenaries and flew up to the one she decided was the wackiest one in the group: Ike.

"Hey, handsome tap-dancer!" she greeted.

"Handsome? You called me handsome?...! HEY GATRIE I TOLD YOU THAT THERE ARE GIRLS THAT THINK I'M MORE HANDSOME AND PRETTIER THAN YOU ARE!!! YOU OWE ME TWO THOUSAND GOLD!!!!!"

The pink-haired pegasus knight laughed and said, "Hey, handsome, what's your name?"

"Ike of Greil Mercenaries. What's yours?"

"Marcia. I'll help your group clear out these stupid boat-monkeys for ya!"

"Really?"

"Yeah!"

"Okay!" and Ike kept on tap-dancing. Meanwhile, Lenora and Gatrie were still having trouble with fighting off that strong pirate. Then, Marcia made her pegasus charge into the pirate and push him into the water. Now that he was slower, Lenora was able to shoot ice blades that hit, and killed her target.

"All right! I've finally killed that stupid scalawag!... Oh, no! I think I be startin' to talk like a pirate!" she cried.

"Come on, Lenora!" said Gatrie, "Let's clear up the rest of these pirates."

"Aye-aye! I mean, all right!"

"I'll fly ahead and help kill the boat-monkeys that are still on the ship!" said Marcia as she flew up to assist Titania and Shinon. Gatrie and Lenora soon caught up with them. Eventually, Ike went onto the ship as well. Soon, the battle was over. The mercenaries went to the elderly man's house.

When the man answered the door, Titania said, "We've driven off all the pirates. Your people will suffer no more indignities at their hands."

"Oh! That is joyful news! Here is your pay, as promised." The elder handed Titania a huge bag of money.

"Thank you very much. And if you find yourself in need again, do not hesitate to send word."

"Of course, of course. All of you put on a most marvelous show-such combat skills! To be honest, I was expecting Commander Greil to be here today. When I saw just you, nothing more than, no offense, a band of children… And some of them were goofing off… Well, I will admit to being a tad nervous!"

"What did you say, old man?" Lenora and Ike said at the same time. They both shot each other an evil gaze.

"I apologize for bringing an idiotic subordinate. Unfortunately, Commander Greil had other pressing matters to attend to."

"Oh, no. Don't apologize. There's no need. After all, you got rid of those brigands, and you did it impeccably quirky, but well!"

"It's a fine compliment you paw, sir, but it was our pleasure."

"As a matter of fact, you're more than good enough to be in the royal army if you so desired. Especially your Commander Greil. He's far and away better than most any general I've seen hereabouts. Er… What I mean to say is… Don't you think running off pirates is a bit… beneath you?"

"That's not-"

"Don't get me wrong, now. you certainly helped all of us simple folk out. Even so, it seems to me the proper place for you and your Commander Greil is in the service of the Crimean throne! Well, that's what this old man thinks."

"We-and Commander Greil- are quite satisfied with the work we do now."

"You've nary a selfish bone among you. Well, then, rest assured we'll speak again if any problems arise. Thank you again." and so the elderly man walked back into his house.

"Hmm…"

"Titania? Is something amiss?" Ike wondered.

"No, of course not. Our mission is complete, and that's all that matters. You did well today, every one of you. So are you a pegasus knight of Begnion?" Titania asked Marcia.

"Yeah, but I'm currently on a…search and rescue mission. Gotta go! Bye, everyone!"

"Bye!" everyone said and watched Marcia fly off.

"Pah! jobs like this barely make a dent in my incurable boredom! It's like that old buzzard said, there's better work out there. Something with a bit of challenge."

"Shinon!" Titania yelled.

"I'm joking. J-O-K-ing."

"Come, Titania. Be honest. Don't you find the work we do a bit… disheartening? Unglamorous?" Gatrie suggested.

"What? You, Gatrie? What's gotten into you?"

"Please! Look, we're not a band of money-hungry recruits. We're professionals, and we're very good at what we do. Shinon and I have discussed this at length. All of this mundane mercenary work is unworthy of us. We're wasting our talents."

"I see. You're telling me that you think Commander Greil is mismanaging us. Do I have that right?"

"Wha! Hold it right there! That's not what I'm saying at all!"

"What is it, Titania?" Ike said out of the blue.

"Ike, shut it." Titania simply replied.

"Okay!"

Titania resumed the argument, "Look, we do good work, and we help people. I want you to be proud of that. I felt like you were saying work that doesn't bring fame or fortune isn't worth doing, that's all. Sorry."

As Titania, Gatrie, and Shinon were arguing, Lenora started to zone out: Pancakes…elm tree…my sword…Ike's looking at the flowers…I had no idea he likes flowers…rubber chickens are stupid…quill…my room in my new home…the songbirds…………………CAJUN SEAFOOD WITH METAL SHARDS AND ONIONS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! she thought.

"Hey, Lenora! Hurry up! We're going to leave you behind if you don't catch up to us!" Ike called behind him.

"Ah! Wait up, you guys!" Lenora ran to catch up with Ike, Titania, Gatrie, and Shinon.