Enough
Chapter Four


He's not a five year old with a skinned knee. He doesn't need a band-aid or neo-fucking-sporin. But that's all he gets, in a sense. Pills. Pills. Pills. Prescribed, by doctors and drug dealers on street corners. Take this every two hours, take this at noon, don't take more than four of these in a six hour window, blah, blah, blah. Drug yourself up, and you'll be so numb you won't want to kill yourself anymore, because mostly likely - you won't have the strength to do much of anything anymore. He wants to die, plain and simple. Everything hurts all of the time. He can't remember where, or who he is half the time. He wakes up with throbbing headaches and stabbing pains in his abdomen, and he cries all the fucking time. But he's afraid that it might hurt more than it will help. That all he'll feel is continuous vertigo accompanied by the feeling of falling down a seemingly endless hole that ends in a stranger world. He's no Alice in Wonderland, he wouldn't get back up. He doesn't have the will power. Tyler Lockwood is not the person he is perceived to be. He is just like the rest of them: scared, lost, depressed.

His skin is almost blue, it's so white, Tyler realizes, as he stares at Jeremy who crosses the lunchroom to walk towards Anna, who is sitting alone. Jeremy with his dark hair, and lanky limbs, and those brown eyes that were reminiscent of the doe-eyed puppy he'd had as a child. Jeremy, who less than ten hours ago was sleeping, with his pale body contorted around his own. Fucking sitting there, with that stupid girl, acting as if everything was okay and normal, when it wasn't. And then she starts bawling. In the middle of the cafeteria. Honestly. Tyler's not the only one who notices, but he's the only one who stares. Jeremy wraps his arms around her, and kisses her cheek, and Tyler stares, still, as his lips drag against her skin, latching onto her mouth.

Everything goes red again, trying to keep his anger in check, Tyler leaves. He doesn't need this.


"Her mom died," Jeremy says, when he sees him at his locker after school. He's hoping it will make things better.

"Sucks," Tyler says, his words cold, distant. He realizes it's not the most sensitive thing in the world to say, considering Jeremy had lost his parents not long away, but he doesn't really care at the moment.

"Tyler, come on -,"

"No. You're - you're a fucking hypocrite, you know that, right? Her mom died, so you have to make out with her? In front of me? After -,"

"- you slipped away in the middle of the night because you didn't have the balls to wake up next to me? To admit that it meant something to -"

"My dad called. He gets violent when I don't do what he tells me to," he says, interrupting Jeremy, flipping open his cell phone to received calls and shoving it in his face, where the last one read, Dad, 3:02. "You obviously don't trust me, so, just fuck it. If you need to look so hard for a reason to dump me, then look no further. Have fun with Anna."

Jeremy stares at him for a moment, registering the bluish tinge around his eyes, he says, "Did he hit you?"

"Why? You don't care."

"Of course I -,"

"Doesn't matter anyways, does it? What are you going to do about? You don't even have the guts to break up with your stupid little girlfriend, but you're going to take on the mayor?" he asks, slamming his locker closed, the sound resonates around them, and Tyler gives him another quick disparaging glance before leaving.


Jeremy's is frickin' radiating guilt as he listens to Anna talk. About this and that, and when he finally tunes in again, she's talking about leaving. "-have anything left for me here. Except you."

Jeremy smiles at her, as she continues talking, "I might as well stay right? But I don't know what to - I don't even know where to start."

Jeremy stares at her for a moment. "Don't do that," he says.

"What?"

"Don't make your decisions based on me. I'm a teenager. I - I change like the seasons."

It's Anna's turn to stare. "What are you saying?"

"There's a lot you don't know about me. You wouldn't - you wouldn't feel the same way if you knew."

"There's nothing you can tell me that'll change how I feel about you right now."

"There is."

"Try me."

Jeremy stops short, they are in the middle of the forest, surrounded by dying trees and broken branches on the ground. "When we - the other night...the day after that? I - I had sex with someone else."

"What?" the word comes out breathless, there is a shiver in her voice. "Who?"

Jeremy stares at her for a long moment. "It doesn't matter."

"Jeremy. Who?"

He blinks, twice, hoping that he'll wake up and it will be a surreal dream. "Tyler."

A sharp intake of breath, "You're -,"

"I don't fall for gender, Anna. Just people."

"And you -,"

"I like him. And I like you."

"And if you had to chose?"

"He doesn't want me. I don't get a choice."

She nods, and scoffs lightly, "So you'd chose him."

"Anna, it's not -,"

"No! Fuck you! You fucking pig. My mom was right. I can't trust you. I can't trust anyone."

"Anna!"

It's too late. He is alone now.


He never thought breathing could become so hard. It's early, still around six, but he's trying to fall asleep. The lights are off, but his lamp casts a dim glow over the room. His mind is tangled so fucking badly that he doesn't even want to try approaching it sanely. His eyes burn and twitch under heavy eyelids and he feels as if he has permanent jet-lag. This kid is seriously fucking with him head now, and he just wants to stop feeling like crap. His homework is on the table, located on the other side of the room, and he would do it, only he doesn't really give a fuck about anything. He'd popped a few pain pills, but they don't really do much for him. He feels like he's taken so many of them for so long that he'd become immune to them, or some shit. Though he doesn't really know if that's possible.

He gets a text, and his phone plays the chorus of some My Chemical Romance song he's forgotten the name of. It's from Jeremy. I'm sorry.

Tyler scoffs and flips it closed. He's certain that he is, but he's suffering, so he'll be damned if he helps Jeremy get the weight off his shoulders. He takes out the easel his least favorite uncle had gotten him for his fifteenth birthday, and paints, filling the white canvas board with harsh strokes of his worn-out paint brush. His mouth is slightly open and his tongue is off to the side, like it always is when he's concentrated. He stops when he realizes that he's drawing the back of Jeremy's head, the surreal image of it, lingering in his head. The layers of hair and the way he's always trying to get it to stay down. Tyler swears and covers the half-finished painting with a layer of blue, before shoving the easel back into his closet. He stands there, in the middle of his room, for one long moment, and then leaves. He sits in the kitchen and eats cereal, dry, with a glass of orange juice. He wonders where his parents might be, but he doesn't think about it for too long. They always have functions and meetings and getting drunk to keep them busy.

The door bell rings, disturbing his thought process, and he goes to answer the door, still feeling out of it.

Jeremy. "Can I come in?" he asks.

"What do you want from me, kid? Huh?" Tyler replies, not answering his question. He realizes he's still clutching the box of Kix in his left hand, and his fingers fumble with the flaps.

"I just -," Jeremy shrugs, "I want to talk to you."

"Talk to Anna," he advises, just about ready to slam the door in Jeremy's face. His face is flushed, and Tyler suspects that he'd run there, from wherever he'd previously been.

"She dumped me."

"That why you're here? I'm your second choice, huh?" he asks, his lips curling into that oh-so-familiar expression that tells him that Tyler can see everything in him.

"No. She dumped me because you were my first."

"You told her?" Tyler's taken aback, but not upset.

"She's leaving town."

"So go with her," Tyler says, determined to make Jeremy think that he couldn't care less.

Jeremy's eyebrows furrow on their own accord, "What?"

"You thought just coming here was going to fix things? That what - and I'm sorry and a blowjob's gonna convince of anything? Well you've got another thing coming. Get lost."

"Why are you doing this?"

"I'm sick of trusting people. They just fuck with you and leave you to burn. I'm sick of trusting you. Goodbye, Jeremy. Have a nice life."

And the look in Jeremy's eyes is almost too much for him to bear, but he manages to close the door, avoiding the dramatic slamming, and sliding it closed. The clicking sound echoes in his head.

Tyler refuses to allow himself to care about Jeremy anymore. If only wanting something was enough to make it happen.


Ugh, the finale was so good, I can't even wait til September aiohdshflkshf. Tyler's eyes were so inspiring. I'll get to him going wolf!Ty in a few chapters.
Review please :)