"Alright, that's it. We haven't seen Peter in days, and the last time we did see him he was moping around like it was nobody's business. It's time we spoke to him."
Susan stated, and Lucy nodded her agreement.
Susan and Lucy had called Edmund to their school (since St. Finbars was just across the road from where Peter and Edmund were, it wasn't much of a hassle) to discuss Peter's wellbeing.
Of course, they had no idea of what Edmund knew about the nature of Peter's relationship with Caspian, and how it was affecting their older brother - and, Edmund figured, (rightfully so) it wasn't his place to tell them. Peter would tell them when (if ever) he should find himself ready to.
"I don't think that's necessary. Honestly, he seems to be getting better." Edmund was lying through his teeth, and frankly, he didn't think he was convincing anyone, but he had to try. "He just has an awful lot on his plate, what with schoolwork and all. Sure, he's a bit upset about Narnia, but it's nothing. He's okay." Susan and Lucy clearly didn't look as though they were convinced.
"He's just adjusting to being in England again. You know how hard it was for him. Really." Edmund added, praying it would be enough for the girls.
It seemed to be, as they nodded (somewhat hesitantly), as Edmund spoke up again.
"I really should be going, we may be on holiday, but curfew is still in a few minutes, and I really shouldn't be late." He turned towards the gate to begin the short walk back to school.
"Do keep an eye on him, won't you?" Lucy called out, and Edmund turned back to smile at his youngest sister.
"Of course."
Peter looked out his window at the setting sun, and couldn't help himself from wondering if it was the same one Caspian was looking at. Of course, he did realise that the time difference between the two worlds would make this a heavy improbability, but the thought that both he and Caspian could be looking at the one same setting sun, no matter how far apart, did offer him some comfort.
He also realised that he was acting a little (or a lot) like a lovesick schoolboy, but he couldn't help it, even if he did rather dislike it.
As he looked out at the horizon, he allowed his mind to drift further away, to a place he had only ever heard of. Aslan's Country. He wondered, if, perhaps, when he passed on , that was where he would end up. If so, would his siblings? Would Caspian? He wondered if it were anything like Narnia, and he came to the conclusion that it must be, it is Aslan's country, and after all, Narnia, too belongs to Aslan.
He was ripped from his thoughts when he heard his door creak open, and when Edmund walked in, he was hardly surprised. Ever since he'd told Edmund the truth about himself and Caspian, (he still wasn't sure if he regretted coming clean or not) his brother had been dropping in to his dorm every so often, in an attempt to check up on him.
"Pete, look, Susan and Lu are worried about you. I didn't say anything, don't worry, btu they're really getting nervous for you. Just... Drop by and see them sometime, won't you?"
Peter completely ignored what his brother had said, still somewhat wrapped up in thoughts of Aslan's Country.
"What do you imagine Aslan's country to be like? Do you think we will end up there after we die?" He asked, and Edmund frowned.
'That's... A strange question. But I'd like to think we would end up there, yes."
Peter 'hmm'ed.
"D'you think Caspian would be there?" He asked, not particularly addressing his brother, this time, so much as thinking out loud.
This comment infuriated Edmund moreso than he could possibly ever say.
"Dammit, Peter! I get it, you miss him. I can't hold that against you, I don't know how it feels, but I can only imagine how it must hurt you, but you can't honestly be telling me that you would consider throwing your life away on the off chance that you may get to see him in a place you may or may not go in the afterlife!"
Peter stiffened, was that really what Edmund thought he was leaning towards?
"Ed, no! That's not... What I was saying. I just... It's not just losing Caspian that's making me feel this awful, you do realise that? Of course, that does play a rather large role, but... Here, in England, I'm treated as though I'm a child. I grew up in Narnia. Literally, I reached adulthood and ruled over an entire kingdom, only to be thrown back into the body of a teenage boy once Aslan had no more need of me. And that's another thing. We were always told to trust Aslan blindly, to expect that he knows what he's doing, and yet, he calls us home, to Narnia, to fight battles, only to throw us back to England when we aren't needed anymore. Does any of that seem fair to you?"
Edmund shook his head,
"Of course not, Peter, but there is nothing that can be done."
"I know. Doesn't mean I have to like it." Peter muttered, and Edmund smiled sympathetically.
But, perhaps it would have brightened the mood of both boys, if they had known that at that moment, somewhere, just outside a grocery store in Cambridge, Eustace Scrubb felt the winds change, the feeling of magic wrap around him and the setting sun fade away into a forest of tall, green trees.
And when he returned, though not for many days, so too, would Caspian.
