Chapter 4: In the Time of the Dinosaurs
Jack sat on Jamie's bed while the latter was reading a book about dinosaurs. Jack was lying on his back, bored out of his mind. 'How long are you gonna be with that book?' Jack asked. 'Hang on Jack,' Jamie said, 'There are other ways to have fun other than snowball fights.' Jack stared incredulously. 'How is reading books fun?'
Jamie ignored him and turned the page. 'Wow,' he said, 'Look at this.' Reluctantly, Jack opened his eyes and looked at the page. 'Footprints,' he said, in fake-interest. 'They're called Trace fossils actually,' Jamie said, glaring at him.
Jack sighed... and suddenly snatched the book out of Jamie's hands. 'Hey!' Jamie said, but Jack just stared at the picture on the page. Trampled into the footprints... were traces of black sand.
'How can this be?' North said staring at the page of the book. 'Dunno,' Bunny shrugged. Tooth looked worried. Sandy was gulping down eggnog. Jack stood there, arms crossed, biting his lower-lip. Jamie stood next to him. Although he knew he should worried about Pitch, he couldn't resist glancing around the Workshop, taking in the sights and sounds and (in the case of the elves) smells.
Ms Frizzle entered at this point with Liz on her shoulder. 'Wazzup!' she said, beaming while Liz gave a "Hang loose" gesture. The sight of all of the worried expressions didn't have any effect on her whatsoever although Liz dropped the gesture nervously.
'Who's this?' Jamie asked Jack, not taking his eyes of Ms Frizzle's dress. It took a brief moment for Jack to register what Jamie had said as he too was transfixed by Ms Frizzle's choice of clothing. Today her dress was covered with dinosaurs. Not cartoon dinosaurs, but real dinosaurs in front of an araucaria forest and a volcano. Her earrings were bones and on her shoes were two mechanical alarm clocks.
Jack snapped back when he realised that Ms Frizzle was standing right in front of him. 'Valerie Frizzle at your service,' Ms Frizzle said shaking Jamie's hand. 'Um... hi. I'm Jamie Bennett.' 'We can get to introduction later,' North said. 'We must find out how Pitch managed to do this.' He tapped the picture. Ms Frizzle took a look. A smile crossed her face and her earrings flashed. 'TO THE BUS!'
'To the what?' Jamie said. 'You'll see,' Jack said smiling.
Jamie stared at the bright, yellow bus. He walked around the bonnet. He stared and jumped as the bus winked. The doors swung open and everyone stepped onto the bus... well mostly everyone; Bunny had to be dragged on board with Sandy's whips. 'Come on Jamie,' Jack called from the doors. Jamie jumped on board the bus and took a seat next to Jack.
Ms Frizzle pulled the red lever. The bus stretched, squashed and span. When it had finished the front had turned into a massive alarm clock. The left side had "Later" written on it while the right had "Then." At the top of the bus was written "Now" and a large red clock hand was pointing to it. Jamie gaped.
'As I always say "You can turn the clock back if you've got the right hands."' Ms Frizzle said smiling and began turning the wheel.
The outside world blurred. The sun and moon became nothing more than two yellow and white streaks shooting through the heavens and strobing like demented disco lights. There was a rumbling beneath the bus as the continents began drifting. There were flashes of green as vegetation began advancing and retreating.
The ground started to crumple and rise as mountain's rose and fell. A brief flash of smoke ran through the sky as a volcano un-erupted back into the ground. Rivers wound their way across the continents like serpents made of water while the oceans rose and fell as the ice sheets advanced and retreated.
All of a sudden the dashboard sparked and the wheel locked. Ms Frizzle looked a little surprised. 'Ooh, that's not supposed to happen,' she said, unconcerned. Bunny shrieked. 'I KNEW IT!' He wailed, 'I KNEW IT! WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!' 'Bunny, calm down!' Tooth said raising her hands to try and pacify him. It didn't work.
'WE'RE GONNA DIE! OUR REMAINS ARE GONNA BE SCATTERED TO THE CORNERS OF TIME AND SPACE! NO ONE WILL EVER FIND US!' 'Bunny, PLEASE!' North shouted. It still didn't work. 'I'M TOO IMPORTANT TO DIE! I'M THE EASTER BUNNY! I'M...' WHAM!
Jack's jaw dropped. Liz lowered her fist and shook it out. No one could say a word. Liz smiled. Tooth was so shocked that her eyes rolled up into her head and she passed out. Ms Frizzle grabbed the Hand-brake and pulled. The bus jerked and came to a relative stand-still.
Jack and Jamie pulled themselves up from the floor. 'Where are we?' Jack asked. A screen at the front of the bus flickered into life. "65 MYA: Cretaceous Period." Jamie peeked through the window and gasped.
They were on a beach. Tall, spiny trees stood not far from the bus and a small stream was flowing over a small cliff into the cyan sea below, around 25 meters away. Jamie and Jack slowly stepped down the bus to the doors and Ms Frizzle activated the door-release. With a pneumatic hiss, the doors opened. Jamie placed one foot onto the earth... then the other. He giggled.
'Why're you giggling Jamie?' Jack asked. Jamie turned to Jack with a massive, cheeky grin on his face. 'I think it's an adrenaline rush,' Jamie said, quaking with excitement. Sandy hopped out of the bus. He gave a facial expression like he was whistling and a dreamsand musical note floated from his lips. North stepped out of the bus along with a very dazed Tooth and Bunny who was rubbing his jaw.
'This is amazing,' Jamie said, 'Don't you think so Jack... Jack?' Jack was sweating like a Yeti in Phoenix. 'Why is it so hot?' Jack asked, wiping a glistening line of sweat off of his forehead. 'Well,' Ms Frizzle said, stepping off the bus, 'Temperatures in the Cretaceous period were 4 degrees higher than today.' Jack's jaw dropped in horror. He froze the area around his feet with his staff to cool down.
'You're not only one with temperature problems,' North said, tugging off his thick coat and throwing it back into the bus. 'So then, Dinosaurs,' North said clapping his hands. 'Many children like them, I get frequent orders for them at Christmas.' 'Like those by any chance,' Tooth said, pointing.
Standing behind them, at 9ft tall, was a dinosaur. It was thin and bipedal with a long snout. It gave a shrill squawk. Jamie reached over to pat it. SNAP. 'OW!' Jamie yelled. The dinosaur had nipped his fingers. He shook his hand. 'An Ornithomimus,' Ms Frizzle said. Jack turned to face her and once again, his jaw dropped.
Ms Frizzle had once again changed her dress; she was now wearing an Australian bush hat (complete with corks on strings), a safari jacket, thick walking boots, a back-pack with a compass attached and purple shorts decorated with bones.
Jamie stepped forward. It leant in towards him. Jamie reached out again. The Ornithomimus shrieked, a screeching shriek. The loud blast of sound made Jamie tumble backwards in shock. The Guardians clapped their hands over their ears. Only Ms Frizzle seemed to be immune to the noise. The Ornithomimus turned and ran into the trees. When it reached the treeline, suddenly hundreds of heads began poking up from the ferns around the tree trunks. The Ornithomimus's squawked and shrieked and suddenly began running together in a flock.
Jack gaped in awe at the sight... then he realised that all the Ornithomimus' were running straight towards them. Everyone else seemed to have realised this. Several yells echoed out and the entire group split up. Sandy and Tooth went towards the cliffs, North and Bunny headed for the Beach and Jamie and Jack sprinted for the forest. Ms Frizzle, Liz and the Bus stood at the centre of the charging herd of Ornithomimus. 'This is rather fun isn't it,' Ms Frizzle said from inside the bus. "Speak for yourself," Liz thought.
Sandy and Tooth hovered across the cliffs. They had run a long way to escape from the angry flock of Ornithomimus'. 'I have a question to put to you Sandy.' Sandy turned to face Tooth and created a question mark. 'Where are we now?' Sandy suddenly looked very worried. They turned to look around themselves. In their haste to escape, they had flown up to the top of one of the highest cliffs.
At that moment, a screeching caw rent the air. Looking up, they saw a massive pterodactyl with a beautiful long neck flying across the sky. 'Oh my,' Tooth gasped. They both stared at the majestic creature for a full ten seconds. Tooth finally broke the silence by saying 'I can't resist,' and she swept up into the sky and zipped across the sky-scape along with the flying reptile. Sandy rolled his eyes, but was smiling all the same.
Tooth was feeling exhilarated. She was doing loop-the-loops over the pterodactyl. They both swooped down to the ocean surface. The reptile dipped it's jaws into the water and caught a fish. They both returned to the air flying high. The thrashing fish knocked out a loose tooth. Tooth squealed in delight, flew down and caught it. She returned to Sandy, clutching her prize.
'A genuine dinosaur tooth,' Toothiana said, quivering with delight. 'Actually,' came a voice, 'The Pterosaur is not a dinosaur.' Tooth and Sandy turned Ms Frizzle was standing there with Liz on her shoulder. 'What do you mean?' Tooth asked, confused. 'The Dinosaurs are defined chiefly by posture. The dinosaurs had stiff, straight legs, unlike modern lizards who have splayed legs or crocodiles which have bent legs. Besides, the dinosaurs were land-dwelling reptiles.'
The Pterosaur flew down to the group. Ms Frizzle patted it on the beak. 'This beauty is a called a Quetzalcoatlus,' Ms Frizzle said smiling and feeding it another fish, 'The fossils were named after the serpentine Aztec god "Quetzalcoatl" because of the long neck.'
As the Quetzalcoatlus took flight again, Ms Frizzle's smiled faded. She now looked slightly sad. 'Driven on to extinction,' she sighed, shaking her head. Sandy formed a question mark. 'This is a dying breed,' she said, gesturing. 'The skies of the future belong to birds that already flourish around us.' Tooth looked sad too. 'It's a terrible shame.'
Don't ask me how, but North and Bunny had somehow ended up on the open sea. North had supplied the inflatable raft. 'How do we get int'a these situations,' Bunny asked as they rocked on the swell. 'Don't ask me, I no know,' North responded. At that point, something massive rose out of the waves. 'What the f-' 'Bunny don't swear,' North said, but he was also hard pressed to hold his tongue. A massive turtle had risen out of the waves.
'Impressive,' Bunny said. 'Gives me idea for toys,' North said, hand on chin. The turtle swam away. 'Um North,' Bunny said. Something in his voice made North look around. 'What?' he asked. Bunny pointed. A six metre long shadow was passing underneath the boat. 'What hell is that?' North gasped. The shape broke the water surface.
It was a fish, the most gruesome fish Bunny had ever seen. It looked like a gigantic, fanged Tarpon, with bulldog like features thrown haphazardly into the mix. Bunny and North ducked down and the fish narrowly missed their heads. It splashed back into the sea, soaking them both. Bunny felt shocked. He had never seen anything so ugly. North was breathing hard as well. The fish turned towards them, then suddenly whipped around and shot off in the opposite direction.
Something on the horizon caught Bunny's eyes. A whoosh of water was heading towards them. 'THE BUS!' Bunny yelled happily, waving. North was looking in the opposite direction. 'Um, Bunny...' North turned Bunny's head around. Flying towards them was the bus. 'But if that's the bus...' Bunny began 'Then what is that?' The whoosh of water was heading directly for them.
A head rose out of the water. It was long, snake-like and very, very big. In it's mouth were two lines of razor-sharp teeth. It's bulging, yellow eyes were fixed on Bunny. It opened it's mouth wide, wide enough to swallow him whole. Bunny was sure that the last things he would know would be the roar of this sea monster and the reeking stench of rotting flesh.
SPLASH! North pushed Bunny out of the boat and into the water. CRASH! The thing landed on the boat capsising it. Bunny stared horrified. He heard a splash. Turning, he found out what was worse than swimming with a 50ft carnivorous reptile; swimming with it's family. Two more of the large creatures and several small ones were circling the boat.
With an upturned boat, a giant rabbit and a bulky human in the water, they were spoiled for choice. So far... they were choosing the boat. One of them smashed the boat with it's head. North and Bunny swam for the bus. Two massive hands snatched the two guardians out of the water. A third fished out the boat.
The bus turned and headed straight for shore. The reptiles were in fast persuit. Ms Frizzle pressed a button on the dashboard. There was a brief moment of spatial instability and the bus transformed into a Pterosaur. With an almighty caw they swept up into the sky. With an ear-splitting crash, a massive reptile leapt out of the water, it's jaws opened wide. They slammed shut on empty air, just catching the edge of the bus as it fell.
'What were those things?' Bunny demanded. 'Tylosaurs,' Ms Frizzle said, grimly, 'Nasty creatures. They often travel in groups to protect their young. They'll attack and eat anything that moves, sharks, turtles, even other Tylosaurs.' 'And the fish?' North asked. 'Xiphactinus it's called,' Ms Frizzle continued, 'Very ugly, very vicious and usually don't chew when swallowing.' 'So, we're all back together,' Tooth said. 'No, we're still missing Jack and Jamie.'
Jack and Jamie weren't having it any calmer. They were both sprinting through the trees. A herd of angry Triceratops were charging after them. Jack was carrying Jamie on his shoulders as the latter was getting quickly exhausted. Jack ran on and finally they burst onto an ashy plain beneath a snow-capped volcano.
Jack leapt to the left. The Triceratops charged on past them. Jack and Jamie lay down in relief... but suddenly the ground rumbled. Out of the ash rose sand... black sand. Jack and Jamie began to move when they were bound by ropes of sand. Jamie was shaking with panic. Out of the ash rose Pitch. 'How nice to see you again,' Pitch said smiling. With an aggressive revving the N-bus drove up, it's red headlights flashing.
At the same time, the real bus flew down from the sky and transformed into it's regular shape. The Guardians and Ms Frizzle stepped off of the bus. 'Hello again Pitch,' Ms Frizzle said smiling gently. 'Valerie, what an unexpected displeasure,' Pitch said bowing silkily. 'The flattery is appreciated but I really have no time for this.' Liz nodded sternly. The two buses snorted at each other.
Bunny and Tooth released Jack and Jamie from their bonds. Ms Frizzle and Pitch began to circle one another. Pitch was looking murderous. Jack wondered why Ms Frizzle was still smiling. If Pitch had been looking like him like that, he would be on the ground with his head in his hands, quivering in terror. Ms Frizzle had guts, he'd give her that.
Pitch struck first. He spun his axe down. 'LOOK OUT!' Jack shouted, but too late...
Ms Frizzle had already acted. CLANG! The axe hit Ms Frizzle's forearm. "Clang" was a sound Jack didn't associate with flesh. WHACK! Ms Frizzle raised her boot and kicked hard Pitch in the solar plexus. He doubled up groaning. Ms Frizzle's coat had been torn, but her arm was completely unscathed. Pitch snarled.
The N-Bus shot forwards to run her down, but the real bus burst from behind Ms Frizzle and hit the N-Bus with a crash and a cloud of sparks. Pitch launched another attack. Ms Frizzle ducked, caught Pitch in his navel and catapulted him over her head. He flew several feet high and far. He hit the ground and spat out a small amount of blood. It appeared he had bitten his tongue.
Pitch got to his feet. He rubbed his jaw. 'Enough,' he snarled. 'I suppose you have all been wondering what I have been doing here.' 'Never crossed our minds,' Ms Frizzle said, but not spitefully. Jack had never had so much respect for someone, not even MiM. Pitch smiled. 'I needed space to rebuild my army,' he said, 'As well as design inspiration.' "Design inspiration" Jack thought worriedly.
Nightmare sand burst forth from the mouth of the volcano. It congealed into a hundred thousand nightmare Dromaeosaurs. If you don't know what they are, think human-sized Velociraptors. Liz ran into Jack's pocket. The two buses revved aggressively at each other. Ms Frizzle whistled. The Bus calmed down.
One of the nightmares charged. Crunch! RAAAAAAAAHHHH! A massive pair of jaws snapped shut on the sand creature. Jack and Jamie gasped. A Tyrannosaurus rex stood tall over them. It opened it's massive mouth (wide enough to swallow Jamie whole) and it roared, it roared so loudly that the horizon seemed to shake.
The nightmares swarmed. The T-rex turned, knocking down a whole battalion of fearlings with a sweep of it's tail. It roared and swung it's head again. More nightmares were smashed to oblivion. Ms Frizzle leapt into the air and brought her hand down with a karate-chop so powerful that a slight dent appeared in Pitch's head. A Dromaeosaur leapt at Ms Frizzle, but with a crunch, the T. Rex's jaws snapped shut on the nightmare dinosaur.
The N-Bus charged at the T-Rex, bent on blood, but with a flash of yellow and a beeping, the real bus leapt into the fray, sending yet more sparks flying in every direction. This was getting more and more dangerous.
All of a sudden, a resounding boom echoed across the world.
A bright light appeared in the sky. All eyes turned upwards. The light was streaking across the sky. Tiny specks of light were breaking off from it. Jamie looked horrified. 'Jamie what's wrong?' Jack yelled above the noise. The light disappeared below the horizon. Suddenly a flash brighter than the sun bleached out the entire world. Jack slammed his eyes shut, buried his head in his hands and placed his head on the ground, eyes down. Even then, the light shone straight through his fingers.
The light faded in silence. Blinking to retrieve his vision, Jack looked up. Everyone else had looked away to save their vision as well so Jack didn't have a clue what had happened. Jamie however did judging by his expression. Jack opened his mouth to ask what had happened when...
BOOOOOOOMMMM!
Jack was blasted off his feet and was smashed into a tree. Looking up, Jack could see a massive, shining white mushroom cloud rising from beyond the horizon. Jamie sprinted over to Jack and hugged his waist. 'J-J-Jack...' Jamie stuttered, 'Don't you know what happened to the dinosaurs?' 'What happened?' Jack asked hesitantly. 'A meteorite crashed into the Earth and wiped them all out.'
Pitch smiled like a particularly evil thought had just occurred to him. A blast of nightmare sand shot forth from his finger-tips and hit the bus. It made a noise like it had shouted in pain. The N-Bus enveloped Pitch in it's black embrace and vanished.
'HOW ARE WE GOING TO GET BACK?!' Tooth yelled in panic as tiny pieces of molten rock began to soar into the sky from the impact site. 'I believe Bunny has the answer,' Ms Frizzle said. 'What do you mean?' Jamie asked. 'Bunny used to be able to travel in time,' North said suddenly snapping his fingers. Bunny bit his furry lip. 'I haven't...' he hesitated, 'I haven't done that for years mate,' he finished. 'If you don't do this now, you won't live to see day, let alone year,' Jack snapped.
Bunny sighed. He clapped his hands together. When he pulled them apart, a massive sceptre pulled free from his palms. The shockwave was approaching. The green egg set in to the top of the sceptre glowed. Bunny twirled the staff through the air and slammed it into the ground. The shockwave arrived. The world bleached out with a scream of sound.
Jack opened his eyes. They were all standing beside the lake in present day Burgess. Jack collapsed onto his back. 'I was sure I was going to die.' He thought to himself. There was silence for a minute. 'I am never stepping foot in that bus again,' Jack lied.
Ms Frizzle smiled. Her earrings flashed.
'I think that chapter worked out alright,' I said to myself, leaning back in my chair and closing my eyes. Suddenly, the telephone started ringing. I opened one eye. 'Again?' I thought. I picked up the phone. 'Hello. How-d'yo-do?' 'Is this Vsyo-Vo-Mrake-Nochi?' 'Yes it is and I would like to know where people are getting my number from.'
'Umm... Is Jack really never gonna get back in the bus?' 'No, that's just a thing you say when you just escaped a very stressful situation. He'll be back on the bus sooner or later.' 'Well that's good to know, but I do have another question.' 'Shoot.' 'I think we've all heard about Mammoths and Sabre-Tooth Tigers, but you didn't mention them at all. Why not?'
'Because the Earth's history is much older than you can imagine. Complex life goes back far further than I wrote about in this chapter; right back to around 544 million years ago.' 'WOW! That's incredible.' 'The Dinosaurs lived from 248 million to 65 million years ago in a period called the Mesozoic era. The Mammoths and Smilodon lived late in the Cenozoic era; the age of recent life, while the Ancient life began in the Palaeozoic era.' 'So, life began 544 million years ago?'
'Nope. How life began if one of the many mysteries of science. Some theories believe life began in hot pools of chemicals call the primordial soup. A more recent hypothesis says that life began at the bottom of the deepest, darkest ocean near hydrothermal vents. The oldest known evidence of life we have ever found was in rocks in western Australia that were 4.1 BILLION years old.' 'BILLION!' 'You heard me right the first time.'
'I have only one more question.' 'Go ahead.' 'How did North and Bunny end up on the open sea?' [CLICK] 'Hello? Hello?'
Next time: Inside Jack
