A/N: Any wolves you recognize from The Twilight Saga belong to Stephanie Meyer.

Basically everything else, including past and present wolf pack members, imprints, wolf families, and additional characters in this story belong to the universe created by the amazing, brilliant, and wonderfully talented yay4shanghai! She even has dibs on the plot… I just wrote it :)

Thank you so much to everyone who has reviewed, it means the world to me! This is a really long chapter so I hope everyone will take the time after reading it to let me know what they thought of it.

Also I waited to post this until after ari11990 posted the latest chapter of Never Trust A Werewolf, because the events of that chapter happen just before this, so if you haven't read it yet, go do that first! :)

As always I recommend you read the other spinoffs by liljenrocks, ari11990, AsagariMelody, Guzhong, twihardcaligurl, intiMACYx33. They are fantastic and worth taking the time to read.

Thank you yay4shangai, for being the greatest beta I could ever ask for!


For Better or Worse


29 August 2036

"Melody, you need to get dressed." I heard dad's flat, emotionless voice being projected from down the hall, just barely loud enough to be heard through the barrier of my sealed door, but it still managed to shatter the silence of my room.

I kept my eyes firmly shut against the noise. I was trying to fall back asleep, to make the time pass faster and hopefully avoid what was planned for today. I didn't want to get dressed. I didn't want any part of today's proceedings. It was too soon; I didn't, well actually I couldn't even believe it was real yet. Besides, wasn't it enough that I got up this morning, showered then ate breakfast in the kitchen? That was more than Levi did.

I contemplated ignoring him altogether. He wasn't likely to notice anyways. Maybe I'd get lucky, he'd see the darkness in my room and think that I had actually fallen back asleep and let me be. If I stayed in the safety of my room long enough, it might just be possible to pretend none of this was happening. If I ignored it long enough, perhaps pretend would become reality or if I waited, eventually I'd find out it was all just some colossal mistake and I wouldn't ever have to face the things currently in store for today, like when people were so sure the earth was flat and you've fall off the edge if you went too far.

I had the shimmery reddish-orange and shear yellowish-gold abstract pieces of cloth drawn across my window forming an asymmetrical shield that blocked out the incoming sunlight. It was too bright out. It had been everyday since the battle and it just wasn't right. The sun had no right to shine today or any of the last three days, not that I had paid much attention to most of that time, but it was supposed to be dark, dreary, damp; an oppressive atmosphere to inspire an appropriate mood. We were in mourning after all, or didn't it get the memo.

The only thing Mother Nature had gotten right so far was the absence of any obnoxious wildlife chatter filtering into the house on this otherwise textbook worthy end of summer day. None of the chirping birds, gnawing squirrels, or other woodlands creatures you'd expect to be present living on the edge of a forest have ever really seemed to come too close to the house. I idly wondered if it had anything to do with five—four, oh god only four now, wolves living here. I was never going to get used to that fact.

The light rapping of knuckles on a solid wood surface resonating from my door four times dispelled the illusion that he had given up and would just leave me in peace. Peace—I wasn't in peace, I was partially numb and firmly entrenched in Camp Denial, but there was nothing peaceful about my life right now, so the least he could do was have the decency to leave me be.

"I know you heard me, Mel," he said in the same quietly dead, detached tones as before.

"Not right now—I can't… my stomach hurts," I refused wishing he'd go away now.

Something about my ruse must have paid off, either that or he wasn't up to trying harder, because I heard him sigh as he walked into Levi's room next door. My werewolf hearing made it all too easy to listen in as he talked to mom, "she won't get up."

"Fine. Keep trying to get Levi up while I go talk to her." She responded tiredly because apparently, Levi was still being just as uncooperative as I was about going today.

This was pretty much the first time I had left Levi's side since we got back to La Push. We'd gone immediately to Devlin when mom and Uncle Mark set him down, but it was only a few minutes later when they came back with Sam to take him away. We wanted to go with, it wasn't right for him to be all alone—he needed us, but they wouldn't let us. We haven't seen him since and that makes it easier to believe that he's just sick, but he's getting help so he'll be back soon.

We'd headed home with Uncle Jay and dad after that. Dad wasn't letting go of Jordan and I don't think he even noticed us with him. I hadn't even gotten to say anything to Tay beforehand and that had hurt. I had wanted to find him, I didn't really want to be away from him for even a moment, being separated felt like the pain associated with having a phantom limb, but he had gone inside to check on his sisters and Solace, who had been severely injured. I'd turned towards the house intending to look for Tay, to at least let him know what was going on and that I was leaving, but Levi had grabbed my hand affectively stopping me. It had only taken one glance at the pleading look on his face to know I needed him just as much as he blatantly needed me right then.

At first the house had smelled stale and muggy from being boarded up for almost a month in the middle of summer, but now the stench is even worse because it has the added musty odors of dried blood, sweat, and decaying forest on top of that. It's a lot like what I would imagine a military's medic field tent smelling like during World War I and the primary culprits are Levi and me since I didn't shower until today and he still hasn't, although dad might have made his own contribution at first too.

The only thing Levi and I had done upon reaching the house was to put on some clean clothes. After that, I'd joined Levi in his room, sliding into his bed with him and he'd hugged me tightly until we fell asleep. It was dark and I was extremely disoriented when I woke up, but I knew a great deal of time had passed because my muscles and joints were stiff from remaining in the same position for too long and my whole body ached from the aftermath of the fight.

Levi was already awake, just staring absently at the ceiling as silent tears slid from the corners of his eyes, leaking in a steady stream over his temples and disappearing into his black hair. I asked him if he was okay and he'd watched my hands, but did not respond. I knew then without finding it necessary to try again that he wasn't planning on communicating anytime soon either. I hugged him, but he didn't move to hug me back. I held him until he stopped crying anyways, but I didn't cry myself, the whole thing seemed too unreal just then, beyond my limited comprehension skills.

I had noticed a plate of cold food resting on his nightstand then, turkey sandwiches, plain whole wheat toast, a couple glasses of water and tried to get him to eat a piece of toast, but he refused. I took a bite myself, but it was like trying to eat a mouthful of dry, flavorless sawdust. Instead of trying something else, I'd simply lain down again and quickly fallen back to sleep.

More time past in a similar blurry haze, caught somewhere in limbo, between the realms of dreams and reality and neither seemed readily decipherable as any more than incoherent babble. At one point I might have woken up to Levi having a nightmare. I think I got hit a few times in the process of waking him up, but the second his eyes snapped open and saw me he broke down crying and I lost it then too when I had a sudden lucid moment of clarity. Up to that point nothing seemed real, it was like walking through a fog, but now it hit me, he was crying because Dev was dead. I didn't want to believe it though and I tried not to, that determination worked more often than not.

The next time I woke was around midday yesterday. Tay had been there, sitting beside the bed holding my hand. He'd asked how I was doing and told me I needed to eat something then mom, dad, Jordan, and Mark all came in before I got a chance to say anything and Levi had woken up. I could immediately tell he was upset with so many people in the room and I'd yelled at them to get out, not sparing them a single glance on their way out as I held onto my brother and tried to calm him down. It seemed I was the only person he wanted around right now. We cried a lot throughout the day and it took a little coaxing, but I got him to eat with me and the only time we were apart the rest of the day was to use the restroom.

Then this morning, mom had come in and said the funeral was this afternoon and we needed to get up and get ready. Levi had turned over so he couldn't see her as she tried to persuade us to even just get out of bed. I got up only because I wanted to stop hearing her say the word funeral; it was so much harder to pretend it wasn't real when she kept talking about it. I went into the kitchen and had breakfast with dad; he didn't acknowledge me once and I was too distracted to care.

Afterwards I had finally showered and washed the grime and dirty off that had built up over the last month. I was a little shocked when the water rinsed it off and revealed that my skin was actually a lighter shade of russet than the one I had grown used to seeing over the last couple days. The steam and pounding water of the lukewarm shower had helped relieve a lot of the remaining soreness and tension I had from the battle and it was nice to get clean, but I didn't enjoy the experience as much as I would have liked to and as soon as it was over I hid in my room where I hoped to skip today altogether.

Lost in thought, I missed mom's approach and was surprised when she suddenly walked into my room. She turned on my overhead lights as she entered so that they shone down on me like one of the interrogation lights used in police questioning. In the harsh yellow light I could see the exact depths of how the recent strain has affected her; it was clear in the vast grief and weariness etched onto every plane and line of her face. She was already dressed in a plain black dress similar to the one she had hung on the back of my closet door for me to wear today, but I had ignored it after my shower in favor of a white tank top and a pair of red cheerleader shorts.

"Please get ready," mom said calmly, if not a little robotically, from the doorway. "We need to leave in a couple hours and at this rate it'll take that long for you and Levi to get ready… we have to get there early, remember?"

"I don't feel good. I'm too sick to go." I claimed causing her to expel a little huff of frustration before leaving my room. She shut the door with a bang on her way out, but left the light on.

I listened as she made her way down the hallway and called Taylor, asking him to come over and talk to me. I knew she wanted him to talk me into going today, but I hoped he wouldn't. I wanted him here, wanted to see him, but I wasn't sure how to tell him about what I was thinking and feeling. I wasn't sure how to face any of that or if I even wanted to. So far the constant swirl of activity had been to keep me from really thinking about what all this meant and I was afraid to face what would come next.

It only took a few short minutes for him to get here, although it was never soon enough when we were apart and I basked in his refreshing smell as he approached. It was so much better than the current smell permeating the house that reminded me too much of the smell of death and destruction.

"Mel? Can I come in?" I heard Tay ask gently and a little unsurely as he knocked lightly on my door.

"Yea," I said immediately. I felt bad that he felt the need to sound so cautious when he spoke to me and it hurt that I had made him fear rejection with my behavior over the last couple days.

I didn't turn over, but I heard him as he quietly entered my room, shutting the room firmly behind him before making his way over to where I was buried under the covers on my bed. I felt him climb in behind me then wrap his arms around my waist, pulling me tightly to him. The summer air was oppressively hot, but this was the first time I could remember actually being warm since returning home.

My body fit perfectly against his hard length now that I was only a few inches shorter, our contours molding to form an air tight seal between our bodies. I felt safe, secure and alive for the first time in a long time as I felt him brush his lips across the back of my exposed neck in a tender kiss. I shivered at the touch, feeling my body react, my heart pounding faster as it always did in response to his nearness, even when I was numb to the rest of the world.

"How come you aren't getting ready?" He whispered into my ear, the action sending chills down my spine. I took a deep breath of his clean scent to slow my racing heart before trying to answer him. When he realized that I was struggling, one of his big warm hands began rubbing small, soothing circles on my stomach like he used to do when I was younger and got sick.

"I don't—uh, feel… well enough to go," I attempted to give the same excuse to him that I had my parents, but the words stuck in my throat and I had to force them out like trying to speak through a gag.

This was the first time I had tried to lie to Tay since I imprinted on him and it was a lot harder than I imagined it would be, nearly impossible in fact. I knew I hadn't sounded very convincing and that he also heard my heart knock faster against my ribcage in an attempt to give me away, so it was highly unlikely that he believed me, but he just kissed my neck again with his thick silky lips, making my breath catch in my throat. He gave me a tiny squeeze before trying again.

"Come on, Mel. You have to go." He entreated encouragingly with his lips poised at my ear, brushing over them with feather light caresses as his lips moved to form the words he was speaking. His coaxing voice swept across my suddenly scorching skin in a refreshingly cool breeze, but the actually words singed individual holes into my flesh like the burning tip of a cigarette.

"No I don't. I'm sick, Tay." I stubbornly refused, but the insincere words tumbled out with a hollow echo that seemed to ricochet off the walls in my tiny room mockingly.

"No you aren't, sweetie." He said understandingly as he sat up, pulling me up as well so that we were sitting facing each other. He leaned forward, resting his forehead against mine making his thickly lashed dark eyes the only thing I could see as I stared intently into them for a time. It was like he was looking into me, at my soul and it was stripped bare to reveal every thought I ever had. The same was true for me. I could see him and right now I knew he was immensely worried about me, hurt and grief-stricken himself. "Talk to me. Why don't you want to go?"

"Don't. Please, just… don't. I can't," I chocked out looking away. It was still way too painful to think about, let alone explain, but it hurt to deny his heartfelt request.

"Please, Mel?" He implored and hearing that was like taking a knife in the gut. Getting up, I went over to the window and pushed the curtains aside to look out, tracing idle circles on the glass for a moment while I tried to stay calm and gather my thoughts to be able to tell him what I was feeling without breaking down.

"I don't want to go—it's too hard." That was all the more I managed to get out before I felt the first spider cracks splinter the fragile hold I had on my composure. He came up behind me and wrapped me in his arms, nuzzling my neck for a second and I involuntarily leaned further back against him.

"Don't shut me out, please don't shut me out. Tell me what's wrong… what you need… what I can do to help." His own pain coming out clearly in every one of his quiet pleading words and I broke down hearing it, spinning around to face him. His hands came down to rest on my hips, his thumbs lightly trailing along the exposed skin of my stomach right above the edge of my shorts. The movement gave me tingles radiating out from the area, made my breathing shallow and both of our hearts beat faster. An emotional upheaval came crashing over me following directly behind the new surge of rushing blood throbbing in my ears and initiating a tempest in my mind.

"What's the point?! Going today isn't gonna him back! So why should I?!" I screamed at him, unable to look at his face and see how my words affected him while every shred of composure I possessed shattered beyond repair as I finally acknowledged what was happening today, really acknowledged it. His grip tightened, holding me in place, but otherwise he gave no reaction to my heated cry.

"I-I-I don't understand! I don't understand why this happened! It doesn't any make sense! And everything just seems so pointless… Why?! Why, Tay? Why did he have to die?" The words came forth, flooding the air with a destructive force like a dam failing. I hadn't been aware I felt that way until I said those words and the verbal discharge continued before he had a chance to answer my questions. Only now I was also punctuating every few words with a helpless, frustrated and angry punch on his chest. "I don—I don't understand why! I just don't understand… any of this! It's so stupid! Death is so stupid—so pointless! Everything just seems so stupid and pointless now…"

"I-i-it's, it's gonna be alright." He said around the tears he was now crying when my verbal assault trailed off even though I continued to pound my fists weakly against his chest and he didn't try to stop me. His words just stirred my emotions up again and I went back to raging at him.

"You don't know that! You have no way of knowing that for sure so don't say that. You can't promise that nothing else is going to happen—so don't! God, I'm so angry! But I don't know who to be angry at so it's just… building up. It's so unfair. This whole thing is so unfair… and it hurts so much, so, so much. I didn't know I could hurt this much, Tay. I just want it to stop. Ugh! These emotions are all so intense… I feel like I'm going crazy."

I was sobbing uncontrollably against his chest now, leaving a sizable wet mark on the material of his dress shirt while he held me close and stroked my hair soothingly, trying futilely to consol me, but still more spilled unheeded out of me. "I don't know how to handle them… this… everything… hell, anything anymore! And what happens now? What do we do now? Am I supposed to know? Know what to do—how to go on?"

"No. No, of course not, sweetie. No one ever really knows. I think maybe that comes with time… that you figure it out as you go… that it gets easier." Tay said honestly after letting me cry for a while.

"Will it really?" I asked with a hint of hope. I wanted him to tell me it would and right now I'd believe him if he did.

"I don't know. But I'll be here… to help. We'll do it together, just, you can't—ahhh, please don't push me away anymore. You have to let me in so I can help and be here for you." He said instead and it was like any strength I had left to fight with was zapped, sucked from my body, and I slumped against him in exhausted defeat.

"This wasn't supposed to happen. I-I don't think…," I trailed off plaintively, not knowing how to finish the thought, not wanting to even think it, but unable to stop myself.

Of everyone that left to fight, Levi, Dev, and I were arguably pretty evenly tied when it came to who the most likely to get killed was. Levi had the disadvantage of being deaf so this was all a lot harder for him, plus he'd been overly concerned with Dev and me the whole time instead of paying as much attention as he should have been when we were training. Dev's size had handicapped him since he didn't grow nearly as much as everyone else did after phasing and I had been way too wrapped up in Taylor to concentrate on anything other than him while we were training. So why did he die when we didn't?

"Of course it was not supposed to happen. None of us saw it coming, Mel," Tay said regretfully kissing the top of my head. He reached up and gently brushed a loose piece of my hair out of my face from where my tears had plastered it to my cheek, but it was too short to tuck behind my ear so it just fell forward again making him grin adorably at me when I looked up at him, even if the smile didn't reach his eyes.

"I don't want to believe it really happened. If I don't go… maybe I won't have to. Like maybe there's a chance I could still wake up and find out this was all just a nightmare and it'll never be real. Ugh, I can't even tell what is real anymore. I don't even know if I am. Nothing makes sense." I told him, shaking my head dispiritedly against him, trying to clear the impending fog that was creeping up on me, preparing to descend on me once more.

"Death never makes sense, but you need to accept that this is real and that Devlin is dead. Ignoring it won't make it go away and I can't change this for you no matter how much I'd like to. This is why you need to go to the funeral, Melody, so you can come to terms with this and start moving on," he said dolefully and held me tighter; I clung to his waist when his words made me start crying again. I couldn't help it; I didn't want to move on, I just wanted my brother back.

"Your parents are going, they need you there. And Levi—he needs you so much right now. This is hard for them too…," he continued then added in a quiet, almost broken whisper, "and I need you there. I can't do this without you."

Hearing those words triggered something primal in the pit of my stomach. I threw myself against his chest, the force of the unexpected impact knocking him back, flat against the wall as I pressed into him and his hands instinctually pulled me even closer. Then I was kissing him, hard, like it was the last chance I would ever have and he responded with equal fervor.

Tangling my hands in his soft hair on the sides of his face, I tugged, trying to force our faces tighter together. His strong, sinewy arms imprisoned me to him and one of his hands braced the back of my neck, preventing my head from pulling away, while the other supported the small of my back to keep me arched against him as I stood on the tips of my toes so that we were almost the same height. Our chests were pressed together and I could feel that both of our hearts were speeding along at the same pace.

The passion and desperation created such an intense heat that it threatened to burn my insides until nothing remained except the orange glow of dying embers. Feeling his soft plump lips glide over mine was like nothing I had ever felt before and my thoughts, which had previously been trying to fly out the window, were now completely centered on Tay and the sensations he was making me feel. I had been on the verge of numbness, poised on the edge of despair about to topple into an endless black hole destined to feel nothing ever again, but now I felt everything and so much more. Every fiber of my being had come to life and was explosively erupting within me, the force greater than I ever could have prepared myself for.

The taste of him as I sucked his bottom lip into my mouth and nibbled lightly was sweeter and more heavenly than the ambrosia drunk on Mount Olympus by the gods. The touch of his hands now roaming along the length of my back, holding me tighter than he ever had, finally showing me that he craved me as much as I did him was more exhilarating than the purest shot of adrenaline could ever hope to be.

"Mmm," he groaned and in this position, with our hips pressed firmly together I could feel his growing hard-on. This was something new. He'd never responded to me this way and it generated an almost unbearable level of desire within me. I wanted to explore his body fully, to feel more of it, of him, but his arms were unyielding and they prevented my hands from moving below his shoulders. Then he did something that sufficiently distracted me, making me forget all about my quest.

I had been positive nothing could ever be better than it was, but then he parted his lips and I felt his tongue dart out, allowing its tip to trace the seam between mine. I gasped in surprise at the unexpected action from him and he used the opportunity to slip his tongue further into my mouth and lightly run it along mine.

"Ummm," I moaned this time as another spike of desire shot through me, but the sound was muffled by his mouth. I was completely consumed by his very essence. It felt like my bones had vanished and electric currents had flared up in their place keeping me in a constant state of ultrasensitive awareness as every nerve in my system was shocked repeatedly.

Just when the intensity threatened to rage out of control and my senses began to shut down from the overload, I felt his head pull back. Unwilling to break our connection just yet, I followed his lips with my own, but he turned his head slightly and I was forced to release his lips. I was breathless and dizzy and he was the only thing holding me up, but I was eager for more and disappointed that he had stopped so soon when I was confident he had been enjoying himself too, if his body's reaction was anything to go by.

I started to pull away, but his hand slid down my back to grip my ass firmly and keep my hips locked against him, his eyes seeking mine. I understood when my eyes met his that he only stopped because he wanted to see me for a moment; that he needed to right then and knowing he needed it, I needed it too.

And there it was—the look. Beneath all the sadness, empathy, and concern I saw his love for me. Not the love I'd always seen in his eyes, but the passionate, animalistic kind of love that made me want to rip his clothes off and let me know he very much wanted to do the same to mine.

I'd wanted to see that look for many years now, a look that was thirteen years in the making. And that kiss… well, it was everything I ever dreamed of and so, so much more, but I'd gladly wait another thirteen years for another if it meant Devlin was still alive. That wouldn't happen though, nothing could bring him back. He was dead, gone, end of discussion, and that was final.

When we'd been kissing, I hadn't thought about any of that, hadn't even remembered. It had just been Tay and me. The rest of the world had ceased to exist, ceased to matter. All I had cared about was him and what he did to me and the knowledge that I affected him the same way. I didn't want to remember the rest, that was painful and right now all I wanted was the ecstasy he had the power to inspire within me.

"Again," I demanded, longing to forget once more.

Passion blazed in his eyes as he used one hand to yank my head back to him, meeting my lips urgently, just as eager to repeat the experience as I was. It was even better than the first time. I ran my hands up and down along the hard planes of his chest, earning an enticing moan from him when I lightly dragged my nails across his nipples through the thin material of his black collared shirt. He never wore shirts and I hated that he was right now. It was in the way. I wanted to remove it, but I had a feeling he would stop me if I tried and I wasn't ready to end this anytime soon. Needing to be closer, I slid my hands up behind his head and into his hair, pushing my chest closely against his.

He began kneading the flesh of my backside, which he still cupped with one hand and the other worked its way down my back to join it. The action generated a powerful need, stronger than any I'd ever known and pushed my hips harder against the rigid length of him. His hands gripped me harder when I did that and he lifted me as he stepped away from the wall. I eagerly wrapped my legs around his waist while he flipped our positions so that it was my back smashed against the wall with his body pressing me against it. I liked this new development. I could feel him throbbing against me and I loved the feel of his large hands now tightly gripping my upper thighs, until I realized that he did it to keep me still.

"Ugh, Tay," I groaned in frustration against his mouth trying to thrust my pelvis harder against him, but he was stronger and stopped me.

"Now isn't the time for that, love," he ground out breathlessly, panting slightly, but not removing his lips to take a proper breath.

The loud crash startled us, bringing us crashing back to reality as we sprung apart. I was using the wall for support as I glanced up at Tay and saw he looked just as concerned over what the source of our interruption could have been. Quickly rushing out the door with him a step behind, we turned the corner and stopped in the doorway of my brother's room.

I clenched my hand into a fist around the door frame to hold me up as I took in the site before us. The racket had been caused when Levi knocked over his bookcase. There were books, trophies, broken picture frames, and other memorabilia that had once been stored on its shelves were now scattered everywhere, littering the floor among the wreckage of splintered wood.

Mom was tiredly rubbing her face; her quivering shoulders slumped in defeat. Meanwhile, Levi was gently smoothing out the wrinkles in the nice black shirt he was holding before he walked over to his closet and carefully hung it back up then mechanically walked back over to his bed and slid in, turning his back to us.

It took a moment, but then I recognized the shirt. It was Levi's, but Dev had been the last to wear it since he could still fit into our old clothes fairly easily. I remember it from when I hugged him goodbye before my trip to Seattle with the Wahallas for Amber's graduation, just a few weeks before Annabelle was kidnapped.

I looked around and found dad standing impassively in the corner watching the scene unfold without really seeing any of it. His unaffected appearance hit me hard and I realized for the first time since getting home that he was broken, irreparably damaged by what happened. It was like my father had died too and if that was the case then Dev's sacrifice was for nothing and I hated that thought, even more than I hated the thought of him being dead. I wanted my funny, loving, laid back father again, not this unfeeling statue.

All at once it was too much, too much to see, too much to process, too much to handle or deal with. I felt my legs give out, but before I collapsed to the floor, Tay caught me up in his arms. I buried my face in the soft exposed skin, just above his shirt's collar at the base of his neck as I cried, not wanting to see anymore of what has become of my family.

"I've got her. You've already got your hands full, so don't worry about her." Tay told my parents or at least my mom and pulled me closer to his rumbling chest before dragging me back into my room. I looked up when he kicked the door shut behind us and found he was looking down at me as well, but he looked worried and a little indecisive.

"Please," I whisper, not sure what I was asking for, but he seemed to know anyways because a second later we were kissing again.

The fresh tears on my face evaporated quickly from their proximity to our combined body heats. He continued walking as we kissed and didn't break the contact between our lips as he laid me on my bed. Desperate for closer contact, I jerked on his shirt roughly, I think I even ripped it slightly as I managed to unbalance him so that he landed on top of me. He didn't try to get up, only moved until his body covered mine and his hips were cradled between my parted legs, his full weight resting on top of me and his hands gently running up and down my sides.

"Uhhh," I moaned at the sensation, it felt amazing and I felt him get hard again at the sound.

I dug my fingernails into his back, trying to pull his closer still and rubbed myself against him, but he squeezed my hips to hold them still and keep them pressed flat against the bed. I groaned in frustration then, although I was relieved that he continued to plunder my mouth hungrily with his tongue. His delicious taste was intoxicating. A short time later, too short, he pulled back to look down at me.

"Did it help? Does it make you feel any better?" He asked lovingly and I could tell it was helping him cope just as much as it was me when I nodded that it did. "I wish I could… help more… do something—anything else. Something to make it… easier, but it will get better. I promise it will."

He sounded so heartbroken when he carefully uttered that and I hated that my pain was hurting him worse than he was already hurting. I leaned up and kissed his lips gently this time. It was very different than the urgent, heated kisses from before and whispered into his mouth, "this helps, so much."

He slid his dewy soft lips along my left cheek then and tenderly kissed my closed eyelid before moving to kiss the other as well. Then he trailed tiny, light kisses along my cheek to my right ear, stopping to whisper, "I love you, Melody Crystal Varn," before continuing down my neck, pausing when he reached my pulse to gently suck on the delicate skin, making me gasp and unconsciously arch against him. His lips returned to mine then for a final slow languid kiss that I never wanted to end, but eventually it did anyways and he pulled back to look at me again.

"I'm scared. What happens if I forget him? What if my memories of him fade or get lost somehow?" I asked Taylor fearfully.

"You won't. He'll always be a part of you. And I'll be here to help you remember if you ever need me to." He promised reassuringly to me. Adding reluctantly, "you don't have to go if it's going to be too hard for you today. I can stay here with you instead if that's what you want."

"I, I want to be there for them. My family. You. But promise you'll be with me… promise not to let go of me all day, for any reason? Please, I need you with me."

"Promise. I'm glad you changed your mind. You need to get dressed now though. We need to get going pretty soon, we're probably running late as it is and maybe you'll have better luck than your parents are having with Levi." He said, but hesitated before getting up. I took advantage of it by giving him a quick sweet kiss. He smiled and gave me two additional kisses before getting up.

"Don't leave!" I yelled panicking, even jumping up to race after him when he made for the door. I knew he was just giving me privacy to change, but I didn't want him out of arm's reach for a single moment today, it hurt too much to even think about.

"Okay. Don't worry, I am not going anywhere," he promised with a brief hug before turning around so that his back was to me while I changed.

The gesture made me smile and I was a little surprised to find I still could as I pulled on my borrowed dress. I slipped on a pair of black flip flops to go with it, figuring no one would care, least of all Devlin and didn't bother with my hair or face since they would just get messed up soon enough. I saw that Tay's hair was adorably rumpled as well and it gave me a rather large measure of satisfaction to know I was responsible.

"I love you." I told him once I was ready to face the rest of the day. He wrapped an arm around my shoulders and gently kissed my temple as he led me out of the room.

~*~ ∞ ~*~