A/N: Hello, fan fiction readers! Here is another chapter of Evil in Paradise! And... Gavner has a girlfriend! Yay! Her name is Lizz, and she is NOT an OC... She is actually from a story on Darren Shan's website, written by, obviously, Darren Shan. It's called An Affair of the Night... I am sure if you Google it, it will show up... uh... Maybe... I dont know... Check his website.
This chapter's a bit short but enjoy it anyway and please review! Or else! Not really! :D (If you flame, I'll sic my ninja monkeys on you!)

I will be updating every Thursday at around seven-ish or eight-ish pm, instead of just random days and random times, because I find it's better that way. Next Thursday, seven or eight-ish, new chapter. Be prepared.

Disclaimer... I do not own CDF, but I seriously wish I did! Darren Shan owns it... yup...


Chapter Four

It's hard to except that Steve killed me two years and two months ago. It's also hard to except that a lot of my friends are dead. But I am glad to have them around in this wonderful Paradise.

We start to see Gavner less and less. He told us this would happen because he said he met the soul of "someone very dear to him". He is going to spend a lot of time with said "special person" now. I have a good feeling the special person is his girlfriend.

Once, when me and Mr. Crepsley talked about old times, particularly when I came to Vampire Mountain for the first time with Mr. Crepsley, Gavner and Harkat, I came to think of Gavner, his bright yellow with pink elephant boxer-shorts and his girlfriend who gave them to him.

Now I am curious. I go to Mr. Crepsley because I am sure he knows the answer. He and Gavner have been best friends for probably eighty or more years, and who would be better to tell me all Gavner's secrets then Crepsley?

The stubborn, orange-haired vampire refuses to tell me and comes up with the lamest excuse I have heard; "You are too young to hear it." I spend the next fifteen minutes trying to explain to Mr. Crepsley that in human years I am around forty even though I look eighteen or nineteen years old! This excuse may have worked thirty-five years ago when I looked twelve, but it won't work on me now! Even at eighteen I should be able to know. Mr. Crepsley is a hundred-fifty to two hundred years old, so he looks thirty. So does that make him too young?

"Please tell me!" I beg. He finally gave in. So he told me about Lizz, Gavner's true love.

"Lizz was a human and Gavner, of course, was a Vampire. Because he was a General, Gavner had to go away every so often to Vampire Mountain where he would stay for months at a time. Lizz hated it when he was gone.

"But her main problem was that she was beginning to age a lot more than Gavner. She looked forty while Gavner stayed as young-looking as someone who was twenty. She did not want to make him feel horrible about her death while he lived for another few hundred years or so. So she decided to just break up with him.

"She left when he was asleep even though she still loved him. She left a note saying it was over and she also left him a going away present so he would remember her, but wince at the memory instead of cry; those hideous boxers he always wears."

"They must not seem so hideous to him, though," I suggest, knowing I am more than likely right. I don't know why it was kept a secret for so long. Maybe Gavner's more sensitive than I thought and he just doesn't want to talk about it because he'd start to cry. And I understand that. I don't really like talking about Debbie to people. It makes me sad.

After Mr. Crepsley finishes explaining, I smile and start laughing. "Did I say something humorous?" Mr. Crepsley asks.

"No," I laugh.

"Then for what reason are you laughing?"

"I was just thinking, if you are so good at telling break-up stories like this," I smile, "then what's you and Arra's story?"

Mr. Crepsley turns red. "Th-that story is irrelevant," he always gets so shy when it comes to Arra.

"Please! Tell me!" I beg.

"NO!" he yells firmly and the subject is dropped. For now!

On a warm, sunny afternoon, Gavner tells me and Mr. Crepsley we were invited to Lizz's house, who wanted to meet us. The house is in human Heaven, though we don't mind. It's not a long trip if you are using a portal to get there.

When we arrive, we see Lizz outside of her hut tending to her garden and Gavner sits beside her in the grass, a smile on his face. "Hello!" Lizz greets us. She introduces herself. We all go inside out of the heat of the sun and Lizz offers us some lemonade.

Lizz is a very nice lady. She tells us a lot about herself. She lived a very happy and long life for ninety-four years. But she doesn't look ninety-four at all. She looks like she's in her late twenties, just like Gavner. Gavner tells us that when we die, we are able to make ourselves look as young as we want, then turn back to our original age. A lot of people made their selves look younger. Even Mr. Crepsley took off a couple of years!

Lizz and Gavner tells me the story about them. Too bad I had already begged Mr. Crepsley to tell me. I just pretend that this was the first time I heard it. It is a bit different than what Mr. Crepsley told me though, because there is more of Lizz's point of view and what she did after she left.

"I could never find anyone I loved as much as Gavner," Lizz says, "So I never married." Gavner smiles when he hears this.

I am still very curious about and why Mr. Crepsley and Arra broke up. So when we get back to the mountain, I ask Kurda. He acts the same way that Mr. Crepsley acted when I asked him about Gavner and Lizz. So does Gavner, Paris, Mika and everyone else! No one wants to tell me. Or maybe they know just as much as me; nothing.

I decide I want to ask Arra, though I am a little worried about how she will react. She has a temper worse than the Vampaneze!

I ask her and she laughs. Not exactly what I expected. She said it was a big secret and if anyone told me she would kill them. Or, if you are in Paradise, harm them, with words, so much they wish they could die again.

I don't want to waste my breath bugging her about it because I know she's never going to give in and tell me. Instead, I go to my room, lay in my hammock and reflect on the day. Then I started to think about the alternate universe me.

When he dies, will he go to my dimension's heaven, or his dimension's heaven? And what about Harkat? He was actually in the same universe as Kurda. If I came back with my original Darren Shan body, who's to say that Harkat won't? And when he does come, with there just be another Kurda running around? How will everyone tell the two apart? Will Arra start to hate Harkat because of the fact he looks like and practically is Kurda?

Kurda and I spend a lot of time map making lately. We have mapped the garden and the whole forest. It's harder than I thought it would be. It involves a lot of thinking and, well, its just hard! While Kurda scribbles on his notepad and I look around, we stumble upon a cove. Redundantly, we call it The Cove.

As we travel around more, we notice some things here in Paradise are similar to things on earth. We find a waterfall similar to Niagara Falls, a Geyser similar to Old Faithful and a big canyon similar to the Grand Canyon.

After we map those, me and Kurda part ways. I have to get back to Mr. Crepsley, so I open a portal to Vampire Mountain, where he should be. As I glance over my shoulder, I notice that Kurda is continuing to draw a map. He is really dedicated to his maps, isn't he? I open the portal door. These portals are really cool because you can see the other side through the door and the people on the other side can see you as well. Before stepping through, I look around for any signs of Mr. Crepsley and see him in his coffin, asleep. Had I really been gone that long? I look away from the portal and above my head. It's already dark. I was so into the map that I didn't even realize it is late! I shrugged and stepped through the door. Hoping I will not wake up Mr. Crepsley, I quickly and quietly walk out of Mr. Crepsley room and into mine.

I sat on the floor and picked up my diary. I started a new diary about a week or two after I got to Paradise, and it is already starting to get full after only two and a half months. For a dead guy, I have a pretty busy life! I have only about four pages left, and I start writing away about what I did today. My eyelids feel heavy and I decide to go to sleep. I crawl into my hammock, but then I decide the floor is comfier and I fall asleep there.


A/N: Whew! Glad that's over... Who's ready for chapter five? No one? No? Okay. I'm updating anyway! :P TASTE THE RAINBOW! *throws skittles

Don't forget to review and let me know if I made any mistakes! Hasta la bye bye!