A/N: Sorry this update is a few days slower than my other ones. traveling back from vacation and all. good news is I had time to write another chapter so look for it later in the day.
A/N: disclaimers- 1) I defintely don't own criminal minds and 2) I don't know didly about cars so I made up most of what you will read about the car accident (yeah i don't acctually know if it could happen but hey i like to think it sounds believable)
Chapter 4
Getting Back on the Horse
"Conference room in 5," Hotch called striding from his office.
"Nothing like jumping right back in" Reid said flatly
"I know kid," Morgan placed his hand on the genius' shoulder knowing it offered little comfort, "but it's time, she would want us to." The past week and a half had been hard on them all. After that night, he had promised himself that he wouldn't break down again. His friends needed his strength and he made damn sure to give them all he had.
Derek and Reid made their way to the conference room where they found Rossi and Hotch waiting for them.
"Where's Garcia?" Hotch inquired passing out the folders
"Here sir,' the tech analyst said quietly before plopping down in one of the three empty chairs. Her usually cheery demeanor was not only absent from her voice but also wiped completely from her appearance. Her usual bright pink or metallic blue streaks were gone from her straight blonde hair, and her outfit of a black skirt and white top showed none of her usual individualist personality.
Her gaze lingered on the two empty chairs, the one in particular that sat with its back to the television monitor. A vision of her best friend smiled back at her.
"Gacia," Hotch's voice pulled her imagination back to reality, "Did you get those files I asked you for." They sympathy in his eyes told her he knew what she had been thinking.
"Yes, sir. I pulled them this morning," she said handing the files across the table to him.
"Alright," Hotch clicked the remote and 3 pictures appeared on the screen. "Mapleton, Virginia. Three female victims, all with red hair, taken from their homes, found four days later under various bridges strangled, raped, and scalped."
"How do we know they were all red heads," Rossi sent out the easy question trying to kindle the brainstorming session from his disheartened team.
"Their scalps were found on stakes, atop the bridge." Hotch clicked to the next slide.
Hotch turned back to his team, well what was left of his team he thought. The looks on their faces barely acknowledged the grotesque picture on the screen. He wanted this case to be a distraction, something they could throw themselves at. It would be difficult he understood, with JJ gone and Emily in no shape to return to work, but he hoped this case would provide a small escape from their pain, from his own pain.
Hotch sighed setting down the remote and glancing to Rossi, who gave him a knowing nod.
"I know this won't be easy," he started watching as they all looked up to meet his eyes, "but there are people out there that still need us. I know it feels like we are somehow not complete without them here," at least he knew that is how he felt, "that just going on as if nothing has changed is betraying her." Hotch paused seeing the tears gather in Garcia's eyes. "but we all know its not what she would want us to do. JJ always said we had to be the voice for the victims, and these girls," he clicked their images back on the screen, "they need us to be their voice now."
For a moment no one moved, as if they were physically torn between helping the girls on the screen and remaining true to their friend.
Hotch was surprised when Reid was the first to speak. The deep hollowness of his eyes forced Hotch to not look away.
"We will take this case, Hotch," the lack of emotion almost startled him, "but we are not going to leave Emily."
Reid's body language told Hotch there was something about the missing profiler he didn't know. "No, Reid of course we aren't going to leave her. I chose this case to keep us close to home to make sure we could keep an eye.." he was cut off.
"I have been keeping an eye on her, we all have." Morgan and Garcia nodded in agreement.
"I know Reid, she just needs some time," Hotch shook his head remembering how Emily hadn't even opened the door the last time he had gone to her house begging her to talk to him.
"It's more than that," Morgan said as he ran his hands down his face.
Hotch waited patiently for him to explain.
"She doesn't believe JJ is dead," Garcia finished for him
"That's normal," Hotch tried to assure them it was just a stage of the grieving process.
"No Hotch, what she is doing isn't normal" Morgan shook his head.
"What do you mean?" he asked wishing someone would tell him what the hell was going on with Emily.
"She is going through every case file and report on what happened in the accident. Her entire house is covered in papers and boxes. She is sure what happened to JJ was not an accident. The last time I was there, she tried to show me how the brake line of the other car had been cut on purpose." Morgan ground out.
"Jesus," was all Hotch could say as he tried to take it all in. Before he could say anything else Rossi stood.
"You guys head to Mapleton, its only about an hour from here. Start working on the profile." he told them.
"Dave, where are you going," Hotch asked as Rossi moved towards the door.
"I've been there Aaron," he said without turning back, "she just needs someone to listen." And he would, Rossi told himself. He would listen and when she was done he hoped he could show her the truth without breaking her into pieces.
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He opened the door and stepped carefully down the stairs as to not upset the tray he was carrying. The man sat the trey on the small table before reaching into his pockets and removing the ring of keys. One by one he unlocked the seven locks to the steel, soundproof door. Taking the tray once again, he stepped slowly into the room.
"I brought you some lunch," he moved towards the huddled figure in the corner.
The figure didn't acknowledge him.
"You have to eat," he said setting the tray in front of her, "made it myself,"
She lunged forward to knock over the tray spilling, its contents on the dirty floor.
"Now, why did you have to go and do something like that," the man asked but with more of confusion in his voice than anger.
"Just leave me alone," she whispered never lifting her head.
"You know I can't do that," he reached out to stroke her blonde hair. She tried to move further back into the corner. "I have waited so long to have you here with me," he let his finger slide smoothly down the soft skin of her arm. He ignored the way her body shook with fear.
"Please, just let me go," she begged as small tears escaped her eyes.
The anger inside of him grew at her wanting to leave him. "You are mine, Jennifer, and I won't let you leave me!" he swiped a hand across the tray still lying at his feet throwing it hard against the adjacent wall.
She flinched back but looked up with the fire that had yet to fail her in her week and a half of being held captive. "I am NOT yours," she screamed. "and when my wife finds you, you will regret ever breathing, you bastard."
Watching as the petite blonde in front of him, shook with rage, he let the arousal of his body wash over him. Quickly stepping forward and forcefully pulling her against him, he smiled at the daggers that shot from her eyes. He grabbed her chin and waited until she had stopped struggling.
"You're precious Emily is never coming to save you," he released her chin to find the photo in his pocket. He shoved it into her face. "You are dead to her Jennifer."
He shoved her back to the floor and threw the photograph down at her sob racked body. Before closing the door, he turned back to her.
"If I were you, Jennifer, I would start cooperating. No one is coming to save you. You are going to be here with me forever,"
Her body should have felt the room shake at the force of the door slamming, but she was too focused on the picture in her hands to notice anything anymore. The sound of the seven locks being forced into place, the coldness that seeped into her body from the cold floor, the burning of the chain that broke into the skin of her ankle, were nothing to her.
She stroked a finger down the figure in the photograph. It was Emily kneeling down by a coffin, her lips in the middle of a somber message. A large portrait of JJ stood of to the side as the rain wept slowly down it.
"I love you Emily, please don't give up on me." JJ leaned back against the cold wall of her cell and closed her eyes to escape to a place where she could feel Emily's protecting arms around her.
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Emily felt her heart tighten in her chest. She put down the file was holding and tried to catch her breath. What the hell was that, she asked herself?
Her glanced around the sight in front of her. For the first time in nearly 10 days Emily really took in her surroundings. The self imposed destruction of her house, brought a half smile to her face, JJ would kill her for having their home such a mess.
She stood up to stretch her legs that had been stuck in the same position for God knew how long. Walking to the bookshelf, she picked up her favorite picture of her and JJ. Captured at just the right moment, when she and JJ had been lost in a world all their own, it had been taken as they danced to their first song as a married couple.
Emily could still feel the softness of her wife's skin against hers as they moved as one to the music. She remembered thinking she could get lost in those sparkling blue eyes that still sent her weak at the knees.
"I will never give up on you Jennifer," she said gliding her fingers down JJ's cheek in the photograph.
She sat down on the couch, and pulled the frame close to her chest, with no energy left to fight the overpowering exhaustion, she drifted off to sleep as the memories of the happiest day of her life played in her dreams.
A rustling from the kitchen made Emily jerk awake suddenly a few hours later. Groaning as the sun intrusively penetrated her eyes, she felt the picture slip from her grasp, landing with a crash on the hardwood floor.
"Damn it!" she cried kneeling to pick up the broken glass.
"I didn't mean to wake you," came Rossi's voice from the entry way.
Spinning quickly to face the intruder, Emily felt the anger rise in her. "I never took you for one to break and enter Rossi," she said coldly.
Stepping towards her, he noticed the picture she clutched in her hands. "I remember that day," he said nodding down at the photo, "reminded me of the look my Abigail had in her eyes the day we were married."
Caught off guard by his words Emily could only stare at the older profiler.
"My first wife," he said taking the picture from her, "she was so beautiful, had the fiery wit to match it too," he smiled as Emily let out a soft laugh.
"I have never heard you talk about her," Emily began.
"When she died," he saw the surprise etched in Emily's eyes, "something in me died with her. I knew I could never love anyone like I loved her," he paused as his eyes filled with tears.
Noting her own tears beginning to form Emily truly looked at the man she had always considered such an enigma. "Sir," she tried to stop him.
Holding up a hand, "As my reputation accurately describes, I tried to find someone to love again, but it was never enough, Abigail will always be the love of my life." He didn't wipe the tear that fell from his eye.
"How did she die," Emily didn't want to pry but the understanding in her boss' eyes pushed her forward.
"Drunk driver," he shook his head, "in our line of work, you always think you will be the one to leave, you are never prepared when you aren't." Emily could see the silent guilt still rooted deep into the soul of the man in front of her.
Silence filled the room before Rossi placed either hand on Emily's shoulders.
"It wasn't an accident," whispered desperately before breaking down into sobs.
Pulling her into a hug, "Ok Em, ok," He waited for her body to stop shaking before leaning her back so she could look at him. "I will listen, I won't say anything until you are done," he assured her, "but when you are done you are going to listen to me, ok."
"Ok," she whispered through her tears.
A/N: look for next chapter later on today, hoped you enjoyed this one. thanks again for the all the reviews keep them coming they really are my inspiration.
