Disbelief, it's all I can feel. Ginger hasn't appeared in almost over a month, and here she is, in a physical form. She looks at me, anticipating my reply.
--
I'm getting sustenance.
Her face is still angry. "You're changing a girl," she says.
So? You were telling me to give in all this time, and I finally have. I thought you wanted something like this.
She shakes her head as if I don't understand.
What?
"Always the naïve one, B." She's trying to torment me, now. She smacks my crooked snout. I raise my upper lip to snarl at her. "Try me," she challenges. I snap at her arm only to find my jaws clamp together. A smirk is on her lips. "See?" She's won this battle.
What do you want? I ask her.
"I want you to leave the girl and go back to the pack you were with"
That's suicide.
"Exactly"
No. Anger burns inside me.
"Goodbye, then," she says slowly. "You'll never see me again." That smirk challenging me still. She kisses my cheek and leaves, jumping off of me and changing into a raven. I lie here, confused. Then the anger changes to sorrow. Sorrow for myself and that I'll never see my sister again. Ever.
--
I see the small cottage through the trees. Smoke billows from the chimney. My face is distorted into a lopsided frown. A sigh that comes out as a growl annoys me. I've lost interest in my appetite. All I can think about is Ginger. With a snarl, I scratch the cottage door. I then hide and wait for the man to come out. A second off cue he appears outside. I leap onto the porch and take out his jugular. He's dead before he even realizes what's happened. The blood that spurts onto my lips makes my stomach twist and churn. But I can't eat.
There's a small hole in the snow that is dug roughly. I throw the dead body into it so I can come back to it.
--
Civilly, I wash my snout in a frozen creek that I broke. The cold water makes my fur shift on my back. As the water washes out my throat from the blood and flesh I stole from the man, I feel purified. The thought that I'll never see my sister again hits me over and over. I sit in the snow, awaiting tears to somehow roll down my lupine cheeks. A growl rumbles deep in my hackles and I want to ignore it. Ginger is gone. Ginger is gone. She's GONE! A great howl escapes me until I run out of breath. The need to destroy tries to overtake me. Fuck. I must stay calm. I must keep my temper in tack. For Jessie. Jessie!
--
"I heard you," is all she says to me when I get back. She's reading a book, taking notes next to her fireplace on a chair.
Oh? Does it really matter?
"Yeah, it does," she replies, looking up at me from her book.
Why?
"Because you left and I heard a loud howl. What did you do"
It doesn't matter.
"Brigitte," her reply is almost scolding me.
I lose it slightly and snap at her, biting yet missing her. Don't mess with me, I say seriously. She gives me a look of near shock before shaking her head.
"Fine. It looks like someone's on the rag. I'll be in my room reading." She stands up and walks away down the hall.
I sigh again and lay on the floor.
