So much for not disappearing again. I've come to the conclusion that it is just not possible for me to update quickly. So, that being said, there will be no more promises about quick updates. I'm just no good at it. I will, however, promise that the story will eventually be finished. I know I've got a bad habit of starting stories and never finishing them, but I really, really want to finish this one even if it kills me. So now that I've covered that, onto the Roy chapter! Hope you enjoy it!
Disclaimer: I don't own Fullmetal Alchemist. I apparently also don't own anymore creativity for these things.
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The strange, little family began to settle into a routine over the next couple days. Not to say it was a very good routine, but it was a routine nonetheless. It consisted mostly of Ed sitting around moping or avoiding Alia while Hughes was at work, and Gracia sacrificing her own free time to care for the child. She had stopped trying to make Edward care for the girl. Quite frankly, she didn't trust him with her. She was content with taking care of the baby while Ed kept Elysia company so she didn't feel left out. It was somewhat dysfunctional, but it worked. That is, it worked until…
"Where is Fullmetal?" Roy asked angrily as he shifted through some papers. Havoc and Breda glanced up at the colonel. "I haven't seen him for nearly a week. He was supposed to meet with me this morning."
"Haven't seen him around," Havoc replied. Breda nodded in agreement.
"Maybe Fuery or Hughes would know," Hawkeye suggested.
"Yeah, but they both have the day off," Havoc said looking somewhat envious.
"Then I guess I'll be making a couple of house calls today," Roy replied.
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Roy decided that his first stop would be the Hughes' household as his friend was in the investigation's department and would likely know more than Fuery. Imagine his surprise when, after waiting impatiently for nearly five minutes, it was none other than Edward who answered the door.
"C-colonel," Edward stammered when he spotted his superior staring down at him with a none too happy expression, "wha-what are you doing here?"
"I could ask you the same thing," Roy answered, a twinge of annoyance in his voice. Ignoring all manners, he stepped inside the home and shut the door behind him. "I came here to ask Hughes if he knew where you were since you've been AWOL for a week now. How convenient that I happened to find you here. So, care to explain Fullmetal?"
Edward opened and shut his mouth a few times, no words coming out, as if he were trying to think up a valid excuse for his absence. Nothing came to him. "W-well, I…"
Concern made its way into the colonel's expression. It wasn't like Ed to act so…nervous? Frightened?
His concern was cut short before he could question it.
"Who was at the door?" Hughes asked with a big smile as he walked into the room. His smile was replaced with shock and guilt the moment he saw who was standing in his living room. Ed, however, took advantage of the moment to flee into the safety of the guest bedroom.
"Fullmetal, Ed, wait!" Roy called after him. "You still owe me an explanation!"
Most likely in reaction to the sudden loud noise of Roy's yelling, Alia started to cry from the kitchen where Gracia had been letting Elysia feed a bottle to the baby.
"I think I'll have to provide you with that explanation," Hughes said to the stunned man in front of him. He indicated toward the couches. "You should probably sit."
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Edward sat at the desk underneath the window of his temporary room absentmindedly twirling a pair of scissors on his finger. He could still hear the low rumble of men's voices holding a conversation in the living room. Although he couldn't make out any words, he knew he was the main subject. And while he was unhappy that Roy had to find out his secret, he was at least happy for the fact that he didn't have to be the one to tell him.
Ed was suddenly aware that the voices had stopped. He laid the scissors down and waited to see if anyone would come to bother him. Sure enough, not a minute later, there was a knock on the door. Edward didn't answer, and the visitor took that as permission to enter.
"So I hear you've had a rough week," Roy said as he shut the door behind him, his voice much gentler than it had been earlier.
"You could say that," Ed responded without turning around.
"I hear Hughes had to drag you out of an alley to get you here. That right?"
"I guess so."
"Ed," Roy said softly as he took a seat on the bed behind Edward, "why didn't you come to anyone for help?" Ed stayed silent. "You don't have to do everything on your own. You should have come to me."
"And why would I do that?" Ed snapped turning his head slightly toward Roy.
"Why don't you trust me, Edward?"
Ed pushed his chair fully around to look Roy directly in the eyes. "Because you never gave me any reason to. You've never cared where I was unless I missed a meeting with you or you had somewhere oh so important to send me to take care of the work you're too lazy to do. When I first joined the military, you held Al's secret over my head to make sure I always did what you said. You've never praised or congratulated me on anything I've accomplished. You always ridicule me and make sure I never walk out of your office still in a good mood. You've never cared a damn thing about me before so sorry if I don't trust you!" He scanned Roy's face for a moment, trying to get a read on his emotion, before angrily turning back toward the window.
Roy sighed heavily before speaking. "I'm sorry it seems that way to you." Ed snorted angrily and kept his view out the window. "Do you know why I came here today, Ed?"
"Because I missed your precious meeting, and you wanted to yell at me for it."
"Because I was worried about you." Ed glanced over his shoulder but made no other acknowledgement. "You miss one meeting, and when we try to find you, we find Al packing his things and you nowhere in sight. Then, you stay missing for almost an entire week. Did it ever cross your mind that some people might just be worried when you completely vanish for that long with no word? Did it ever cross your mind that the people close to you do care about you? Hughes took you in. I would have taken you in. Hawkeye, Havoc, Breda, Fuery, Falman…anyone of them would have taken you in."
"Like you can be sure of that."
"I'd bet my title as Colonel."
"So what does it even matter?"
"It matters because you need to have a little more faith in us, Ed. We aren't your enemies. We're your friends."
"Well, maybe I don't need friends like you. So get out."
"Edward…"
"I said get out!" Ed shouted standing up and knocking over the chair in the process. "I don't need you taking pity on me! Despite what all of you seem to think, I can handle myself on my own!"
"That's the thing," Roy said. He stood up and started making his way toward the door. "I do believe you can handle yourself on your own. But you aren't on your own anymore. You have to take care of yourself and Alia, and that's something I think you need help with. And you shouldn't be scared to admit that."
"Get out…" Edward hissed.
"You know where to find me."
With that, Roy walked out, shutting the door behind him. Ed stood staring at the door for the moment. He could hear Roy and Hughes talking but again, couldn't make out the words. A moment later, he heard the front door shut. As he was picking up the fallen chair, Hughes poked his head in without knocking.
"Dinner," was all Hughes said.
"I'm not hungry."
Not wanting to add more fuel to the fire, Hughes said, "Eat a big lunch tomorrow, okay?"
"Yeah," Ed answered quietly sitting back down at the desk. He turned once more toward the window as Hughes left and shut the door. He stared at the slight reflection of himself and frowned. "Why can't you do anything right anymore?" he asked his reflection. When the reflection provided him with no answer, he felt his eyes fill up with tears. "Gonna cry now? Think that'll solve anything? Crying serves no purpose! It won't change anything!" Despite his argument, the tears started to fall. He couldn't stop himself. "No more crying! No more! It won't do anything!"
He slammed his fist onto the desk, and as he did so, his eyes fell upon the pair of scissors he'd been twirling earlier. Something about them just seemed so…inviting.
"Idiot," he said shaking his head. "That won't do anything either." And yet, he couldn't tear his eyes away. Maybe just one, just one cut, and he could get it all out of his system. He would feel better. Just one cut to release all of his pain. It certainly couldn't be any worse than bawling his eyes out. Just one tiny cut.
He opened the scissors as wide as they would go and looked at his reflection in the blades. He looked a mess. Feeling complete disgust with himself, he settled one of the blades upon the soft skin of his wrist but didn't do more.
"Come on, wimp," he said to himself. "You deserve it. Just do it!"
As he was about to pull back on the blade with all the force of his anger, he heard Alia cry. He stared for a moment at the metal before lifting it up. Rage flared up inside him, and he yanked open one of the drawers of the desk and threw the scissors inside.
He laid his head down on his arms. "Stupid. You'd only be proving that bastard Colonel right if you did that. I'll show him. I'll show him I can take care of myself, and Alia too." He buried his head deep in his arms. "I'll show him."
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So how'd you like it? I had a little trouble getting back into the flow of writing, but I guess that's my own fault so I really shouldn't complain. I was feeling a bit depressed when I started writing so I guess that helped the emotion of it a bit. I feel better now though. Ah, the powers of writing. But anyway, like I said, I'm not gonna make anymore promises about when I'm going to update, but I'd at least like to think it won't take as long anymore. But finish it I shall! Thanks to everyone for being so patient with me!
Until next time!
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