Shadow of the Past
Chapter 4
"Teresa, I meant what I said that night. When we faked your death…." Lisbon's breath came in short, quick breaths. Their faces were millimeters apart, their breath mingling together. "I meant every word of it." Green eyes met blue and Jane brought his hands to her face. In an instant, their lips met.
Kate turned her head away; her nose crinkled in what could've been disgust and even embarrassment.
When they pulled away, Lisbon's eyes were still closed, but her lips were turned up in a smile. Jane grinned broadly at her when she opened her eyes, "Patrick," she sighed.
"Teresa," began Jane, but her lips pressing into his again silenced him.
"I'm struggling to see the downside here." Commented the other blonde as the scene faded and reappeared.
Lisbon and Jane were both standing in Lisbon's small kitchen, Jane chopping up an onion, while Lisbon stirred a pot of pasta. A small TV set was running in the background, a newscaster running his spiel.
"…And in other news, Howard Shultz, a known associate of the infamous serial killer Red John, was found guilty of all charges in the conclusion of his trial today…"
A stiff, uncomfortable silence filled the small room at the name of Red John. "Patrick, can you pass me the salt?" Jane wordlessly passed the small canister to her. Lisbon shook a fractional amount of it into the pot and set it back down. The sharp clunk of the knife hitting the cutting board as Jane diced the onion was the only noise in the room. Lisbon laid the spoon down next to the pot and turned to Jane. "Patrick? Are you okay?"
Jane inhaled sharply and let the knife rest on the counter before turning to the dark haired woman, "Yes, yes, of course."
"No, you're not. You pretend like you are, but I know that inside you are going crazy. Red John was your life for almost 10 years, and then he was gone. You're closing yourself off, it's not healthy!" cried Lisbon.
"Firstly, he was not my life," began Jane.
"Don't lie to me. He was. Red John was more important than anything. He was everything."
"Fine," he spat, "Excuse me for trying to avenge my family. I'm sorry we all can't have amazing, loving families like you."
Kate and Jane both winced at his words. Jane now understood how much those words hurt his partner and if he could, he would punch his future self. Or get Lisbon to do it.
"Patrick, don't…."
"No, no, you want me to talk, so I'm talking. Red John was mine. He killed Angela and Charlotte. He killed my family. But you shot him. You took away my last trace of closure."
"Please listen-" She started, then cast her eyes down ward.
"What aren't you telling me? You're keeping some sort of secret,"
An empty silence filled the room, both staring at each other, one pleading, and the other stiff, unfeeling. Lisbon was the first to break the silence, "Look, Patrick, I don't want to lose you."
Jane slammed a fist on to the table, "Then why are you lying to me?"
"I'm not-"
"Yes, I can see it in your eyes. Teresa, you may have been around me for years, but you can't lie to save your life. Now what-"
"I'm, I'm, I-I'm," interrupted Lisbon, "I'm pregnant, Patrick."
Yet again, Lisbon's kitchen was filled with silence. Jane had completely frozen, blue eyes wide with shock. Lisbon sank down into one of the chairs, tears threatening to escape.
The past Jane was also silent, but there was a glimmer of hope beneath the shock. "She's… she's pregnant? But I always assumed she was, you know, older."
"This baby was your miracle. Your second, or third, or even fourth chance. And let's just see what you did." Kate snapped condescendingly, or as condescendingly as a teenager could.
"You're… pregnant?" Jane asked coolly.
"Yes. I took the test this morning. It was positive." Lisbon whispered softly. "Patrick, please talk to me."
Jane's eyes finally met Lisbon's, but there was no love, or affection in them. There was only coldness like Lisbon had never seen before, a dislike aimed at her.
"I'm sorry, this is just too much. I need to take a walk." Jane pushed past a now standing Lisbon, and stalked towards the door. He barely remembered to grab his coat and keys.
"Wow, you're a great person," commented Kate. Jane's face showed not a trace of emotion, except self-loathing.
Lisbon was slumped in the chair, silent tears streaming down her cheeks. She seemed to curl into herself as if protecting herself, but it was too late.
Jane blinked and found himself watching a heavily pregnant Lisbon sitting in a strange apartment. "Where-" His unfinished question was answered by Grace and the mysterious Maggie appearing.
"Here, Tess, eat this. It'll help." Maggie handed her a small carton of ice cream and a spoon with a sad smile. "So what's this letter?"
"It's over in my bag."
Grace fished it out and began reading silently. The emotions on her face ranged from pleasantly surprised, to raging, redhead fury in a matter of seconds. "He's in Philadelphia. And he's not coming back. That asshole." Lisbon's eyebrows shot up at the younger agent's unusual language. Grace quickly backtracked, "You know, in a manner of speaking."
Maggie, who had just finished reading the letter, nodded, "No, I agree with Grace's assessment. Jane's an asshole. And I only met him a few times."
"So, quick review here: You played with her emotions, got her pregnant, then ran off to the clear other side of the country. I applaud you." Every time Kate's hands would slap together, Jane would cringe and flinch violently.
Jane still looked to shell shocked for words and just stared blankly at Lisbon. "Maybe I'll come back once the baby is born."
"Why don't we see?"
"So, boss, you have a name for her?" Rigsby asked, making soft cooing noises at the small bundle in his arms. Lisbon looked absolutely exhausted, but happy all the same. The rest of the team was there as well. Grace was weighed down by a bunch of flowers, a teddy bear and a duffle bag. Cho's normally stoic face was replaced with one of quiet joy.
"I was thinking Alexandra Margaret."
"That sounds lovely," Grace chimed in cheerfully.
"I need to make a call," Cho said before walking outside. Punching in a number, he spat into the phone, "Jane. You have a daughter. Name's Alexandra Margaret Lisbon." And slammed the phone shut.
"Let's see if you even come back for your daughter. Oh wait, you don't." Kate crossed her arms and pierced him with a terrifying glare that still somehow felt familiar and reassuring. "This is two years later."
Lisbon was shockingly in her office doing paperwork. But instead of an empty desk, it was littered with pictures of Alexandra.
Rigsby and Van Pelt knocked on the glass door and Lisbon waved them in with a smile. "Hey boss," Rigsby greeted cheerfully.
"Wayne, I'm not your boss anymore. How are things over at the arson division?" she asked, setting down her pen and ushering them to the two chairs in front of her office.
"It's going great. The team is really great. I'm very happy."
"That's great. Can I help you two with something?"
The couple shared a quick grin before Grace said, "I'm pregnant." Her mouth stretched to the widest smile any of them had ever seen on the sunny woman.
"Oh, that's great! When did you two find out?"
"Just this morning!" Lisbon rose from her chair to give the red head a hug and then gave Rigsby one as well.
"I'm so happy for you two."
Grace beamed as she blurted out, "Now Lexi will have someone to play with. It'll be great." Lisbon bobbed her head in the positive, "I can still work though, until I'm 8 months along."
"Rigsby," answered the man, cradling his phone in his shoulder, "Okay. Give me 5 minutes and I'll be down there." He turned to the two women, "I have to get going. Case just turned up. See you, boss," he smirked at Lisbon's obvious eye roll, then turned to his fiancé, "Love you, babe."
"Rigsby and Van Pelt got back together? I knew they were meant for each other. They're each other's lobster." Jane murmured to himself. Seeing Kate's look of confusion, he quickly clarified, "Lobsters mate for life. They have soul mates."
"Would not have guessed you to believe in that stuff."
"Grace, I need to go re-interview Rex Landa. You can either come or stay here and stay on that tracker."
Grace considered this for a moment before nodding, "I'll come with you. It's nice not to be stuck behind a desk anymore."
"Well, this place is a dump." Jane took in the filthy room he was now standing in. Trash replaced the carpet and the entire place reeked like a mixture of stale beer and human sweat. "Why can't suspects ever live in nice comfortable places?"
"Because that would be too easy, now wouldn't it, Jane?"
Jane gave a half-hearted shrug as he focused on the scene.
"Mr. Landa? It's Agent Lisbon from the CBI, I have a few more questions for you. Can you open up?" There was the resounding crack of fists hitting the wood of the door. "Mr. Landa?"
"Oh, there he is," Jane followed the line of Kate's finger to a heap of what he had initially believed to be dirty laundry.
The pile of clothes began to move and rise. A glint of steel flashed in the sliver of light in the room. Rex Landa grunted towards the door.
"If you don't open up, I'll break down this door." Lisbon called.
"Get off my property!"
"3…2…1…" CRASH! The door hitting the dirty ground caused a puff of dust to rise.
"I said get off my property!" screamed Landa, waving the gun around. He carefully aimed it at the two agents. Grace was temporarily blinded by the dust and did not notice the gun pointed directly at her. However, her small boss did. Lisbon launched herself at the redhead and managed to tackle her away from the speeding bullet.
Jane let out a sign of relief at the sight, but it did not last for long. A small pool of blood was spreading across the front porch. "Teresa!" he cried, sounding as if he had been the one to take the bullet.
If his entire focus had not been on Lisbon, he would've notice Kate wipe away a small tear.
"No, no, c'mon boss, don't die on me." Grace had shed her coat and was holding in over the seeping wound in Lisbon's side. "For Lexi. Please."
"T-te-tell Lexi I love h-her. She," cough, "'s my- my- my miracle. Find Ja-jane." Her breathing was becoming less and less steady.
"No, you don't get to die on me." Keeping one hand on the wound, Grace managed to fish her phone out of her pocket and dialed 911, "this is Agent Grace Van Pelt of the CBI. I have an agent down at this location. Gun shot wound to the abdomen. Need an ambulance now."
The next 3 minutes were the longest minute of everyone involved's life. Lisbon's eyes were fluttering open and shut, and her breathing had become weak. Grace kneeled next to her, tears streaming down her face.
Finally, the scream of the sirens was heard. Paramedics flooded the scene and were prying Grace away from Lisbon.
"Ma'am, you can ride in the bus with her, but we need to get going." One man said, dragging her along. Grace nodded wordlessly, shell shocked by the events.
"Grace," Lisbon stammered out, "Take- take care of my little girl. B-b-be happy. D-d-d-d-don't make my mistakes."
Jane could do nothing but stare helplessly. Kate wouldn't even look at the scene in front of her.
"Stay with me, Teresa. You can do it. I know you can."
Lisbon's lips moved, but no sound came out. Jane looked questioningly at Kate, "Our Father, who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name; thy kingdom come; thy will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread; and forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us; and lead us not into temptation but deliver us from evil." She paused to inhale, "The Lord's Prayer." Jane returned his gaze to the woman on the bed.
"Lexi," sighed Lisbon softly, so softly it could barely be hear by those next to her.
"She's flat lining!" One of the medics called, pushing Grace out of the way roughly. Grace, who was on the phone with Cho, quickly ended her call and gripped Lisbon's hand.
Lisbon's chest rose and fell one last time and her lips seemed to curve slightly into the familiar smirk.
"She's gone," the medic declared.
"Teresa," Grace sobbed. She managed to collect herself enough to call Cho back, "She, she didn't make it." Cho's curses could be heard over the line, "Will you or Maggie or Wayne go and pick up Lexi. I can't believe she's gone. She's Lisbon, she is, was, invincible."
"Ma'am we're here."
"Okay, thank you."
"We'll try and get our coroner to get this done as quickly as possible." Grace nodded, but then asked, "Can I take her crucifix? You know for her daughter?"
"Of course. How old is her kid?"
Grace sniffled a bit before saying, "She's 3 years old. A real sweetie."
"Oh god. I hope she has a good dad."
There was a moment of pure discomfort between the two when Grace explained, "He, uh, ran out. Nobody knows where he ran off to."
"Ah, geez, I'm really sorry."
"No, no, it's okay. You didn't mean anything." Grace kept her eyes firmly trained on the gold necklace between her fingers. "I'd better get going. Thank you. I know you tried everything you could."
"Uh… you're welcome." The medic awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck and nodded, "Well, I better get going."
"Of course." Grace offered the man a watery smile as he walked away.
"But my daughter…. What happens to her?" Jane asked, a tone of panic setting in.
"Do think I would leave you hanging?" Kate teased lightly, still a little choked up.
They soon found themselves watching the CBI team all sitting in front of Jane's couch. A dark haired little girl was curled up on the couch, completely asleep.
"So, who's going to tell her?" Rigsby inquired, speaking quietly as not to wake her. "Maybe you should do it, Grace. I mean, you're well, a woman. It makes it a little better, I guess. But if you don't want to, me or Cho will do it." Rigsby stumbled over his words in a way only he could.
Grace looked down at the necklace, and nodded, "No, I can do it. It might make her feel better. Have either of you two tried calling Jane?" She spat the last word out with as much venom as Grace Van Pelt could possibly muster.
"I tried calling his number, but it said it's been canceled. I did call her brothers. Tommy's on his way from San Francisco. James is flying in from Chicago. And Mark should be here soon. He was here for a training camp." Cho recited dutifully. The other two shared a sad smile.
"You know, she took that bullet for me. She saved me. It's my fault." Grace buried her face in her hands, "And to think earlier, we were just talking about the new baby and Lexi playing together. And now, she's gone. Lexi's never gonna have a mother. It's my fault." Rigsby rubbed a large hand up and down her back in what he assumed was a soothing manner. A tiny hand touched Grace's knee, causing her to look up sharply. A pair of vivid green eyes stared back at her.
"Auntie Wrace, why cwry?"
"Oh sweetie," sobbed Grace and she instantly pulled the girl into a tight hug. "I'm so, so, so sorry."
"Sowwy?" Her small hands found the gold necklace in Grace's hand, "Momma's neckwice! Momma?"
The soft cries from the girl brought fresh tears to the redhead's eyes. Grace's eyes flashed to the others and they nodded slightly, "Lexi, sweetie," she settled the girl on her knee so Lexi was facing her, "you know how Mommy's job is very dangerous."
Lexi bobbed her head quickly, "Mommy sway's dwagons and monstwers," she declared proudly.
"Uh-huh. Did she ever talk to you about how she might not come home some nights?"
"Is Mommy on a twip?"
Grace bit her lip and continued, "Sort of. Sweetie, Mommy's not coming home. She… she's with God up in heaven."
"Mommy's gone?" Jane could feel his heart breaking all over again at the sight of those big, watery green eyes. "Mommy!" wailed Lexi, clinging to Grace's neck. "I want my Mommy!"
"I'm so sorry, bud," Rigsby chimed in, ruffling her hair.
"Lexi!" Everyone turned and saw yet another dark haired man running towards them.
"Wuncle Marco! Where's Mommy?"
Mark scooped her up in his arms. Lexi buried her face in his neck, loud sobs muffled against his neck. "What happened?"
"Teresa was shot. A suspect started shooting. She saved Grace," Cho explained in remarkably few words.
"Here, we have this for Lexi. I think she would've want her to have it," Grace held up the gold crucifix.
"Reese's cross. This was my mother's and my grandma's before that. Reese definitely would've liked Lexi to have it." Mark gathered it in his hand, "Lex, can I put this on you?" Lexi pulled away from him and nodded slightly. "You look beautiful, just like your Mommy." At the words, Lexi broke into fresh sobs.
The sound of footsteps broke the silence of the room. "What happened? What happened to Tess?"
Grace was still silently crying while Wayne consoled her, so Cho responded, "She was killed saving Van Pelt."
Maggie looked at Van Pelt, an eyebrow raised, "How far along are you?"
"What?"
"I'm a doctor. I can tell when people are pregnant." Maggie replied curtly. "Congratulations." She turned her attention to Lexi and cooed, "Hey there, squirt, are you doing okay?"
"Waggie!" Lexi reached out her arms for the woman to hold her, which Maggie obliged to happily.
"You called James and Tommy right?" Mark asked, his eyes seeming to have permanently set to panic.
"Yes, Tommy's driving from San Fransisco. And James is waiting for a flight in Chicago. They'll both be here soon," Cho said calmly. "Do you want a coffee or something?"
"Yes, I would love some coffee." Mark sighed, sinking down into one of the chairs, his head buried in his hands, "This wasn't supposed to happen to Reese. She's the strongest person I know. She's done it all," he cast his gaze to Lexi, "Reese was so excited to be a mom, especially to a girl, not 3 rowdy boys. What about Lexi's dad?"
"We tried, but his phone has been disconnected."
"So who's gonna take care of Lexi?" Mark questioned hurriedly.
Lisbon's team shared a look, "We can take care of her. I know you travel a lot with your job, so it would be hard for you to settle down with a 3 year old. What about your other brothers? They couldn't take her, could they?" Grace asked, twining her fingers with Wayne's.
"James has a set of 5 year old twins and his wife is pregnant again. So I think he's out of the running. Tommy has Annie and he's doing that whole bounty hunter thing, which is not the best environment for a little kid. Reese had a will right?"
"I would guess so," Grace said with a shrug.
Maggie reappeared with Lexi propped on her hip, "She did. I was one of the witnesses."
"So we'll need to get that. What about a funeral?" Wayne turned to Mark, offering him the floor.
"I'll deal with that." Mark said softly, watching Lexi thoughtfully. "She looks just like Reese. A mini version of her. Where is her father?"
"We don't know. Last time any of us heard from him was when Teresa was pregnant and he said he was in Pennsylvania. But other then that, I have no clue. I would guess that he's not named as her guardian." Cho explained quickly.
"First thing tomorrow morning, I'll do a database search for him. Even if he won't come back, he deserves to know what happened," Grace, diplomatic as ever, reasoned.
"And this folks is what we call a royal fuck up." Kate said as the scene shifted. They were standing on the end of a funeral in a deceptively sunny and cheerful grave.
Jane's eyes instantly found the small figure of his daughter, curled up in her older cousin's arm. She was dressed in a black dress and her mother's cross hung around her neck. Annie ran a hand through her hair in a soothing manner, occasionally wiping away Lexi's tears and occasionally her own.
"Teresa Lisbon was possibly the most caring and giving person I have ever had the pleasure of working with and meeting. She protected all of us, saved us many times from our mistakes. She died saving my life and the life of my unborn child. I will always remember her and be in her debt." Grace swiped away a few stray tear from her cheek as she stepped down.
Cho patted her softly on the arm as he passed her. He resumed Grace's position at the podium, "The strength Teresa had was unparalleled. She was known for her stubbornness, but it was always well reasoned and for the better of others. She always believed in people and giving them second chances, some more then others," Jane, despite knowing they could not see him, looked away in shame, "She took me in when everyone else rejected me for my background. Teresa was able to look past rocky pasts, or distasteful families, or age. She saw the good in everyone. So in her memory, I ask that we all try and see the good in everyone."
"That's the most I've ever seen Cho say in one sitting," breathed Jane, shocked, "And I never knew he could be so passive aggressive."
"I probably knew Tess longer then anyone, spare her brothers. We were practically sisters when we were younger. She always pushed me to follow my dream of being a doctor, and now here I am. Tess dedicated her life to making this world safer for everyone. She truly was a superhero. She was so excited when she learned she was going to be a mother. Tess had so much love and heart to give. She wanted to share all of that with Lexi. That was dream was ripped cruelly away from both of them. But Teresa Lisbon left us all with some part of her, some thing we learned from her. It is up to us to share that with her daughter. We are her legacy. Thank you. Rest in peace, Tess." Maggie stepped down, hastily wiping her face on her sleeve.
Mark Lisbon was the next to speak, "People often think that they have a guardian angel. Someone up in heaven that watches over them, keeps them safe. My guardian angel lived on earth. She was my sister. She took so many punches for me and I pushed her away. It took me 15 years to figure out how much she sacrificed for me. But I know now how much she gave up for everyone she came in contact with. She truly was an angel. Love you, Reese." A loud wail interrupted the peaceful silence from Lexi.
"Momma!" she squealed, fresh tears hydrating the dry ones. Annie tried desperately to sooth the sobbing girl, but it was to no avail. Lexi continued crying, but her head was nuzzled against Annie's shoulder, preventing any wails from escaping.
Kate reached out and brushed a hand against Jane's. He spun to face her, obviously shocked. She smiled softly at him, eyes still watery. Jane responded with an equally watery smile.
Mark had left the podium and was kneeling in front of the little girl. "Lex, sweetie… it's okay. You're going to be okay."
"I…I…wa-wa-ant my mommy! Marco!" She twisted out of Annie's arms and threw herself at her uncle, who was trying desperately not to cry. Tommy rose from his spot next to Annie and gathered his older brother and niece in a tight hug.
There was not a dry eye in the place when James joined.
After the Lisbon family hug, the funeral proceed as usual. A priest dressed in formal attire stood over the hole in the ground where Lisbon's body had been lowered. He recited something in Latin Jane did not understand. And then handfuls of dirt were thrown on the coffin and Teresa Lisbon was truly gone from the earth.
"Surely, I'll come back for my daughter. I'm not going to leave her on her own."
Kate's eyebrows shot up her forehead at an alarming rate, "Wanna bet on that? Let's go see where you are,"
They soon found themselves in a dreary, muddy graveyard. Three men stood around a freshly dug grave. A clean, unsullied headstone rested at the end of the grave.
"Rest in peace man," One of the men said, pushing his long, wet hair out of his eyes. "So no ID on the body?"
"Nope," another replied, "No wallet, no wedding ring, no pictures, no nothing. No family showed up to identify him, or even file a missing person's. But, the guy did have a sweet suit on. One of those fancy 3 piece ones. You know, like showmen do?" The other two nodded in acknowledgement.
"Well, boys, it's too cold for an old man like me, so we'd better pack up,"
"Okay Digger, we'll get right on that."
"I died?" Jane spluttered weakly.
"…Yeah… car accident. It wasn't the Citroën if that helps."
"I died"
"Yes,"
"I'm dead…"
"Yes. Everybody dies. No one is immortal. Get over yourself," bit out Kate.
Jane reeled backwards at her harsh tone, but remained quiet after that.
A small dark haired girl bounded down the stairs, a braid bouncing up and down off her back. She had aged a few years since the last time they had seen her. Even at the age of 7, Lexi looked like the spitting image of her mother. "Marco! Marco! Marco!" she called.
"Polo! Polo! Polo!" Mark yelled back from a back room. "Hey, Lex, you ready for your first hockey practice?"
Lexi rolled her eyes and Jane smiled broadly; that was all him.
"Marco," she began with the sass of Lisbon and Jane combined, "I've been skating since I was this little," Lexi stated as if it was general knowledge.
Mark squatted down next to his little niece. "I know that, and you know that, but everyone else doesn't know that. So you just go out and skate your hardest, okay?"
"How else would I skate? My softest? That doesn't make any sense, Marco." Jane's heart swelled at the sight of the perfect little smirk on his daughter's face. It was a perfect copy of Lisbon's, one that he saw all too often.
"It's an expression, now go get your stuff."
Jane mused, "I never would've guessed I would have a kid playing hockey."
"Yeah, well, you do." Kate shot back, somewhat defensively.
While Jane stared curiously at Kate, the scene around them changed.
"Lex, Cho will pick you up. You're staying over there. Be on your best behavior. Their baby is still little, not a big girl like you. Now go get 'em." Mark ruffled her hair affectionately as she sat down on one of the benches and began pulling out the numerous pieces of equipment.
"Okay then, Marco. You can leave, I don't need my uncle to stand over me."
"Fine, fine, I'm leaving kiddo." Mark shook his head with a smile. After a long pause, Mark turned his back to Lexi and walked out of the rink.
Kate pulled Jane up to the stands and pushed him into a bench. Jane's vacant eyes were trained on his small daughter who was quietly sitting by herself, not making eye contact with any of the others.
"That has to be all Teresa. I am in no way shy or antisocial."
"Just watch your daughter."
"Why are we?" Jane asked, eyes not leaving his daughter.
"Well, you see, I thought you might like to see your daughter, but if you don't, then we can go," Kate replied with a shrug. She stood to move, but Jane roughly yanked her down. "Or we can stay."
Jane watched with utter fascination as his daughter practiced. But eventually, an hour later, it came to an end. Jane's eyes glowed with the pride of a father as she stepped off.
"Cho! Cho!" Lexi cried, grinning broadly at the Asian man.
"Lexi," he nodded to her in his usual greeting. "Let's get your stuff packed up. Julia made dinner for you,"
"Grilled cheese?" She asked eagerly.
"Yeah,"
Cho lifted her heavy bag over his shoulder and led her over to the door.
A few stray parents, waiting for their kids, muttered to the others, "Wasn't the man who dropped her off different?"
"Yes, and the girl is most definitely not Asian." A mother with her face coated in makeup said smugly, as if she was the smartest person in the world.
Jane glared at the woman with all of his might, despite the fact she did not even know that he existed.
"Kate, did she ever know who… who I was?"
"Eventually." Kate said cryptically. "Would you like to see?"
"Yes, I would love to," choked out Jane, tears clogging his senses.
The scene shimmered into a gloomy graveyard, barely illuminated by the dim light of morning. The entire CBI team, and the three Lisbon brothers stood to one side, watching as Lexi squatted down next to her father's grave.
"Hi Dad," whispered the teenager. There was barely a trace of Jane in the girl. Her hair was dark and curly, her eyes forest green and she must have been only a couple inches shorter than her mother. Even down to her jeans and jacket did she look like her mother. There was very little of a mischievous glint that belonged to Jane. There was of course the glimmer of humor that Lisbon had always had, but at the moment her eyes were remorseful.
Jane stood stock still as his daughter spoke. "You probably don't even know I exist. But that's alright, I suppose." Ah, there was Lisbon's usual blame herself gene. "I know you had another daughter and a wife before. It's fine that you didn't want us or me. I don't hate you for that. What I do hate you for is what you did to my mother. I can barely remember her. And even fewer of those memories is she actually smiling. I can never forgive you for leaving her. I had to grow up, not only without a father, but without a mother. And that is your fault. I will always, I suppose, care about you in some twisted way. But I will also hate you forever." Lexi pushed herself up, a world-weary expression on her face. She lazily dropped a bouquet of flowers onto the grassy ground without a second thought.
Jane stared, open mouthed, at Lexi. She waltzed back to the adults. "Can we go?"
"Uh, yeah. I'll go get the car," Rigsby volunteered quickly, shuffling away from the awkwardness of Lexi's anger.
Van Pelt reached out for her shoulder and Lexi shuddered slightly under her touch, "Lexi, are you alright?" Her fingers darted up to the gold necklace that hung around her neck in force of habit.
Lexi turned to the taller redhead, and said, "Yeah, I'm fine. I just wanna go back home. When is our flight?"
"It's not until tomorrow. Sorry," Van Pelt responded sadly, pitying the teenager in front of her.
"No, it's fine, Aunt Grace. Really, I'm fine," but it seemed as if she was reassuring herself more than anything.
"But… did… what if…." Jane struggled to find words, his mouth opening and closing like a fish.
"What if Teresa had never died?" Kate supplied.
"Yes, wouldn't it be better?"
Kate's shoulders bobbed up and down in a shrug. "It depends on your definition of better."
"Can you show me?"
"You mean, can I show you that reality? Yes, yes, I can. You can decide which you think is better."
"Alternate realities?" Jane spluttered.
"Yeah, there are always alternate realities."
"You mean, there's one Angela and Charlotte are still alive. Is there a way to jump between realities?"
Kate's eyes darkened ridiculously and she snarled, "You are such a git. Even after all of this…."
Jane took a tentative step back from the fuming girl. His mind was still racing, trying to figure out how he knew her. There was something eerily familiar about her, but he couldn't put his finger on it. He stared at her trying to figure it out, but nothing was clicking.
"Well, are you waiting for the grass to grow?" Kate asked sharply. Jane was jolted out of his musings and looked at her in confusion. "It's a little bit more complicated to switch realities. So come on." Kate grasped one of his hands and dragged him through the fog that surrounded them.
Oooo, alternate realities? Next time! Any guesses who Kate is? And Jane really is a big git.
Drop me a note if you please. It makes my day and makes me write just that much faster!
hoagie
