A/N: A big thank you to all, who left me a review for this story, I really appreciate all of them! I'm glad you enjoy this story so far. Now, I leave you to another chapter :) Enjoy.
CHAPTER 4
Sue grinned widely, when she saw her husband walk into the bedroom, looking absolutely exhausted. He had no idea when the weekend has passed; the girls were ecstatic that their daddy had more time to spend with them than just an evening, and made sure not to leave him much opportunity to do anything other than spend time with them. Yet, he definitely wasn't going to complain; if it was only possible, he would willingly spend every day like that.
Even though it was now the end of November, the weather was still pretty nice, and he didn't hesitate to use the warmer day to take girls to the park. Sue and Levi stayed at home, after he insisted that she deserved some time only for herself; at first she wanted to come with them as well, but later she decided he was right. Their daughters didn't mind at all, because at least for a while, daddy was perfectly capable of being all they needed, even if after some time they would all want her mommy as well. So, they were all fooling around, all five of them running, squealing, giggling and making most of the people turn their heads in their direction. Jack didn't really pay attention to it, but when he did he saw on his own eyes, what Sue was always repeating – that everyone was looking at them with a mix of curiosity, confusion, admiration and some, also a slight jealousy. Whenever they were out, he didn't hesitate to have some fun with the kids, being one of not so many fathers doing it so openly.
He couldn't imagine he could act any other way. Sue and the girls were his everything, and he didn't hesitate to make them feel it whenever he had the opportunity to. Family was something he saw as the most important thing in life and always cherished more than anything. It was one of those things that his parents showed him, and even though for a long time, there used to be only him, his mother and his father, it never changed. This feeling only grew stronger, after he fell in love with Sue and their daughters were born. He didn't really remember his grandparents, as they passed when he was just a small boy; his parents didn't have many siblings, and those they had didn't really keep in touch with them. He himself was an only child, but now he understood his mother's words, which she spoke to him any time he asked her if he could have a brother or a sister, that they would give him one if only they could. It wouldn't be anything strange nowadays, but back then it wasn't very common for people to have the first child when they were almost forty and even though he never really asked, he was pretty sure that they simply couldn't have a child and it was also explaining their slight over protectiveness, as well as being called their special little boy. Yet, it didn't change a fact that his family was always small, and he wanted it to change.
If someone had asked him one day, how many children he would like to have, he definitely wouldn't have said five. Not, that he didn't want that many, because he actually hoped for five or six, but he needed to be realistic. Where would he find a woman, who would share this dream and be willing to give him as many? He didn't think he would, and as the time passed, he was only getting more convinced in this belief, because practically all the women in his life cared more about the career, and thought about one child, if any. But then, Sue stepped into his life and he was soon lost for any other woman in the world, and even though it has taken him a heart attack to start a relationship with her, it definitely wasn't going to take any less to make him let her go. She gave him four amazing daughters, who he was sure were going to grow up into wonderful women, and he couldn't forget about this little one growing under her heart. Could a man ask for more? He definitely didn't feel the need to. If anything, he would only wish for everything to happen earlier. He was going to be over sixty, when his youngest child was going to turn eighteen, and when was time for him to get the chance to take care of his grandchildren, drive his kids mad while endlessly spoiling the little ones?
He sighed, climbing into the bed next to his wife. Perhaps he was going to get the chance to do all of that, who knew. Sue smiled wider, seeing him practically fall asleep, when he positioned himself comfortably on his back. He didn't even have strength to lean to her and give her a goodnight kiss, like he always did. She was practically only waiting for him to join her, so she could snuggle to him in order to doze of a little easier, and placed the book on the bedside table, turning off the light and moving closer to Jack. She was sure he mumbled something, when she placed a gentle kiss on his cheek before resting her head on his chest and closing her eyes as well. They were both going to need their strength for the following day, and it wasn't long before they were both sleeping peacefully.
Next morning, they found themselves amongst all the other people sitting in the waiting area and waiting for their doctor's appointment. She was very close to postponing it, because she didn't want Jack to miss it, but now was glad she didn't do that because she didn't have to wait much longer to see the baby for the first time. She was soon asked by the nurse to come into the doctor's office, while Sparky remained there a little longer, coming in only after he was asked to. He found his wife and the doctor already waiting for him, and sat on the stool next to the bed Sue was lying on, taking her hand in his. She smiled at him, and the corner of Jennifer Matthews mouth also moved up, as she watched them; she knew this couple for quite a few years now, witnessed the birth of all their daughters, but she was always amazed by the strength of the bond between them.
They've both already been through it four times, but it didn't mean that they felt any less excited than the first time. Even though it was only on the monitor, and at this point, it didn't really look like a little human, they were going to see their baby for the first time, see that it was really there and in a couple of months they were going to get to see it for real, as well as hold it in their arms. But no matter what, in no way they were ready for one of the biggest surprises in their lives, and both stared at the doctor with their eyes wide and full of disbelief, when she showed them the familiar shape of the baby, only to move the device a little on Sue's abdomen after a while to show them a second one.
They were really surprised. Even though somewhere back in their minds, there was a thought it was possible, especially that twins weren't such a rare thing in Sue's family, but they didn't think it would happen to them. Yes, they did think about it during the first time, even second, but now when they had four kids, they didn't really consider it anymore. They knew it was a stupid thing to do, as it could happen any time, and it did now. It couldn't really reach them, even as they listened to the doctor, explaining them what was going to be different and what they should do another way than they did previously. The pictures weren't lying, and they could both see it very well, but it seemed they simply needed a little bit more time.
"I know that I'm saying that every time we see for sure, that the home test wasn't wrong, but I feel scared…" stated Sue, only after they arrived at their favourite restaurant for lunch, where they drove to in almost complete silence.
It's been a while since they had the opportunity to be there or even spend some time without the kids. There were few days in the year, when their friends always took the little Hudsons, so they could have a date night. They were also spending two weeks every year at each of their grandparents', and Jack and Sue didn't need much to start missing them horribly. It never took more than three days for them to want for their girls to come back home to them. Now, however, that the older two girls were at school and Darcy was looking after the younger ones, they decided to use the time as much as they could.
"It's going to be fine." he signed and spoke at the same time, in case she wasn't focused enough to read his lips as he could see that she was still a little lost in her thoughts.
After so many years of learning and practicing the language, he became pretty fluent in it and even though there were still words he didn't know, especially those more difficult and rarely used ones, he had absolutely no troubles communicating in ASL and didn't even need someone to sign slower for him anymore. He was taking her to signed performances, accompanied her to The Little Bookworm Club meetings whenever he could, and often amazed a lot of people by his openness to the world of the deaf. With Sue's skills to read lips and speak, it was unnecessary for him to learn her language, and yet he decided to do not only that, but even try to understand her world better, earning respect and admiration from a lot of people.
Sue nodded and felt him take one of her hands into his, squeezing it. She sighed and reciprocated the gesture, giving him a small smile. He was right, of course she knew that, but she still couldn't stop feeling at least a little afraid. It wasn't any different previously; she was very close to freaking out when she found out she was pregnant with Michelle, so soon after their wedding. She was terrified she wasn't going to be able to manage to take care of a child, be a good mother for them. Then, when they found out about Emma, she knew what to expect and how to deal with it, but was afraid if she was going to be able to do all this with one, and later with two and three more little children. Jack, of course, was helping her as much as he could, still most of the day she was alone with them. And even though she knew that she will work it out, right now she felt scared. He knew and understood it perfectly; it was the same way for him and in his heart, there was also happiness next to those feelings, just like in hers. There was no way it was going to be easy with six kids, just like it wasn't now with four or even with one. Yet, a big family was their dreams come true and agreeing for it, they were both aware of both sides of what it was going to bring to their life.
They were brought back from their thoughts to reality, when the waiter approached their table with their meals. Just like they always did, they chatted about everything and nothing, simply enjoying each other's company, while eating and later went for a walk in the park. It was the tradition they started at the beginning of their acquaintance, continued when they began dating, got engaged and later married. Even though now it wasn't as regular as it used to be, they were still known by others, who had similar habits and didn't change them over the years. Those never had any difficulties recognising the dark-haired man and blonde-haired woman, who were almost always coming there together. Those, who had the opportunity to meet them since the beginning, could admit that they actually watched how their relationship progressed, from what seemed to be friendship - balancing on the border of relationship, to a very happy marriage with four beautiful daughters.
Jack watched his wife carefully. It was almost as if he could see the thoughts whirling in her head and he was wondering what was on her mind. He really wanted to ask her what was so obviously bothering her, somehow he thought it wasn't something, what came to her only upon learning of the fact, that in about seven months, they were going to have not one, but two more children. And even though his curiosity was slowly getting the better off him, he managed to keep it at bay and give her some time for a longer time, until they reached their house. At first they enjoyed the difference from what it usually was there, but after a while they both agreed that without the girls, it was too empty, too quiet, lifeless.
"Sue..." he started, not able to hold himself off any longer, gently touching her shoulder to get her attention. They were sitting on the couch, one of his arms wrapped around her, holding her against him. She gently shifted, so she was able to look at his face. "What is it, Sue..?" he asked and a sigh was all the response he got. "Hey, Sunshine… Talk to me…"
"I'm scared…" she said after a moment, the expression in her eyes making his heart clench.
"We're going to be fine. It might be difficult at times, but we'll be fine. No matter how many children we'll have, we're going to love them and give them the best life we can."
"Yes, we will, if everything goes the perfect way. But what if it won't? What if something is going to happen and shatter this dream life we lead right now?"
His eyes widened, at the sight of tears slowly filling her eyes and realised, that he was right and it was indeed something way deeper than what one could think at first.
"Jack, I almost lost you, just a few days ago… You may say you were wearing a vest, that everything is fine, and thank God it is, this time. " she put a huge emphasis on the last two words. "But what if another time, it's not going to be? What if you get shot when you will not wear it? Or something else is going to happen? And don't tell me you're careful and whatever else, because it means nothing. I live in this constant fear that something will happen to you, that you will leave us and…"
Her voice broke, and she took a deep breath, trying to calm herself, but the tears from her eyes fell down her cheeks anyway. The grip of his arm around her tightened much more, pressing her tightly against him. She hid her face in his neck and he held her, doing everything in his power to give her as much comfort as it was only possible.
"Don't get me wrong, I'm happy about them…" she said finally, placing their hands over her abdomen, her voice shaking less. "A little scared at the thought of two babies and four lively, stubborn and sometimes moody little girls in less than a year, but happy. I love our children with all my heart, they are the best thing that happened to me, along with being with you… And I just can't imagine, that one day I… we may lose you…"
For a moment he had absolutely no idea what to say. He considered a lot of things to be the reason for her distress and now that he thought about it, it should, but it haven't crossed his mind that this could be it. He knew she was scared about him; it was something she was completely right about – no matter how careful he was, he could never be sure it was going to be enough, and if it was the other way around, he would be worried sick as well. And even though he was trying not to show it, he was afraid too. He was aware that no matter the precautions, the life-threatening situation may appear out of nowhere at any moment and catch him completely unprepared. Just the sole thought of it terrified him horribly; he didn't even want to think that one day he may go out to work, and never come back to his wife and their children. It was also a part of why he had gone to D., why he wanted to change what he was doing, because no matter how much he liked his job, it was absolutely nothing in comparison to the love he felt for his family and he would be willing to do the most boring, annoying things the FBI just could give him, if only it meant that he would have the certainty that he was safe.
The more he thought about it, the more he understood why these worries were triggered in Sue just now. They were there all the time, of that he had no doubts, but she kept them inside her, only occasionally letting a little of them come out and only now he realised how strong they actually were. He wasn't sure what to blame, if it was the surprise they received, the hormones, or something he didn't even think about, but something finally let them free.
He sighed heavily, shifting a little. His hands immediately reached to cup her face, his thumbs were tenderly stroking her cheeks as he leaned closer and placed a lingering kiss on her forehead. It was followed by another, and the next one, his lips moving all around her face and placing the affectionate gestures all over it only to finish with another gentle, lingering one on her lips.
"You aren't going to lose me, Sue… Never…I promise…" he said, when he moved away just a little, but enough for her to read him.
"Don't… You can't be certain you'll be able to keep this promise…"
All he could do was nod. She was right, he had no way of being sure about it, but it didn't mean that he couldn't do anything to make it be this way. He only needed a little time to think about it, to figure out how to do it the right way. Until now, he has chosen the easy path – talking to D. and waiting – but perhaps he should try something else? The talk wasn't complete, there were so many thoughts in his head, so many things he wanted to tell her, to discuss with her, but he couldn't find the right words, or needed to think over them. And the way she snuggled back to him left no way for her to read him, and he didn't really feel eager to withdraw his arms from around her to sign.
They had no idea how much time has passed, while they were just sitting snuggled together on the couch, enjoying the closeness with one another. He was actually getting pretty close to dozing off, keeping his eyes closed, when he heard Sue speak up again.
"Can you imagine the team's reaction when they find out..?"
The first thing he did was chuckle. He could imagine it very well, he almost heard their voices in his head, having no doubts what each of them was going to say. Tara, for sure, was going to be happy for them. Lucy, who despite the fact that she didn't work with them for a long time now was still considered to be a part of it – just like Sue – was surely going to be absolutely ecstatic and he was pretty certain that most of her neighbours were going to hear her squeak, when they share the news with her. They could both see Myles rolling his eyes and giving some comment, as well as a goofy grin on Bobby's face. And Dimitrius - he was surely going to congratulate them. Yes, their friends were surely going to be happy.
"Can you imagine my mom's reaction?" he asked and his heart jumped when he saw the biggest of smiles come to her face.
"Of course! I'm pretty certain that by the end of the day we tell her, the whole town will know that she is to have two more grandkids to spoil!"
"If not sooner! She's just so happy about them… And also a little sad, that she doesn't get to see them more often."
"Yeah… If there is anything, what could make her happier, it's having them closer."
"Or having more grandchildren, but us living closer is definitely a number one."
"You know that I love our children with my whole heart, but she will have to be satisfied with us having six of them."
"Well, who knows what the fate still has stored for us… We agreed that Jadie is going to be our last, we were using contraceptives, and where it brought us? To expecting two more babies. And when I think about it, ten is such a nice, round number…"
"Ten?" she asked, with her eyebrows raised, while the playful sparks in her eyes were leaving no doubts that just like him, she wasn't entirely serious about it.
"Well, maybe I got carried away a little, but you know what they say about seven… It's a lucky number."
"Okay, I can agree for seven, even ten." she said, kissing his cheek, surprising him. "On one condition, though. You're going to be the one carrying them for nine months and giving birth." she gave him her best grin, and the expression on his face immediately matched hers.
"Of course."
He captured her lips in what was supposed to be a very gentle kiss, but quickly evolved into a much more passionate one. They were both breathless, when the sound of the doorbell made Jack jump, and break the kiss.
"Door." he signed in response to the questioning look in her eyes and stood up to open it.
It turned out to be Darcy, bringing Vanessa and Jade home, just like they agreed. The girls immediately ran to the living room, and he could hear them – actually, mostly Vane – chatter about what they were doing. That would be the end of the peace, he thought, but didn't mind at all. Their house was finally almost back to normal.
