Veteran Reconciliation

I stare at the power plant. There, looming upwards to the clear blue sky... and I have a strong dislike for it. Nuclear power is expensive, inefficient and polluting. People say it's a clean power source. But mining is very damaging environmentally, and there is the processing of the radioactive ores. Then there is the disposal of the waste. It costs a lot of money to deal with the fuel for these stations. I never thought about it. Until now, I never thought about power stations, about the environment, but since talking to the Elder Tree, I can't stop thinking about it. This is important. Really important.

"It looks a lot different than I remember," Derek sounds like he's having trouble adjusting to being in the past. I understand. I have that sometimes. I go somewhere, and I have different memories of the place. Darker, bleaker, more horrible...

"The resistance controls this plant?" Mommy asks. I keep on staring ahead.

"Battle of Babola Beach, December 8th, 2026. Humans gain control of Serrano Point from Skynet." I tell her, keeping all feeling out of my voice. I feel conflicted. Part of me is glad Skynet lost, and part of me wishes it had won. I feel torn by the loyalties to my two families.

"It's a key strategic hold, it's one of our main sources of power." Derek says, his voice still a little distant. He's remembering. Maybe he was at the battle? I don't know if I was. My memory was wiped. I wish I could remember. I don't like not knowing. It feels wrong.

"The guy who died said something about two days. What's happening in two days?" Internally, I frown. I don't know. It's not information I possess. No... no. Nothing. It's all missing. And I don't like that. I feel useless. And lazy. As if I'm not contributing enough to my family. I need to provide something, though...

"Maybe Greenway will tell us?" I say, a small tint of hope in my voice. Greenway is our only lead. Wait, no. I remember when I saw the Resistance fighter I fell in the crater just when there was a second jump occurring. Jane had jumped in and saved me, by controlling the time displacement with her Kirlian device, but I hadn't realised that the implication would be that someone was coming across. And that someone had shot him.

Oh. It must have been a Terminator. It's the only thing that makes sense. A Terminator sent to stop the fighter from warning us. Yes... that makes sense.

"Maybe Greenway is trying to sabotage the plant. Do you think he will tell us that?" Mommy asks. I consider this possibility. Why would he do that? Is he a terrorist? Maybe he's a disgruntled employer. It's happened before. But how does this relate to the future? I need to answer her, though.

"I think he will." I tell her, certain that in one way or another, it'll happen. If I must, I'll break his bones to get the answer. I feel unsettled about this, though. My food processing system feels like it'll reject it's contents. I must be malfunctioning again. I need to run a diagnostic. Make sure that everything is working okay.

"I'm going to look around," Mommy says, opening the door. "I'll be back in ten minutes." She gets out, and slams the door. Derek turns round to face me as soon as she's out of earshot.

"So. Why were you tree hugging, instead of securing the perimeter?" He's still very angry. He's been brooding over it. I look away, to the floor.

"The area was secure. The trees wanted to talk to me. You interrupted my interfacing with their leader." he snorts at this.

"You really want me to believe that? Because when I tell Sarah-"

"Don't tell Mommy!" I blurt out. My eyes widen and I slap my hand to my mouth. I've slipped up. This is bad. Very bad. I'm going to be in trouble now...

"Mommy? Sarah isn't your Mommy! You're metal! A Machine!" I feel tears trickle down. I start to hug myself, rocking gently forwards and backwards.

"Skynet is my mother and my father. Skynet made me... And now I'm with you. Skynet would take me apart to find out what went wrong. To built a better model. I don't want to be dismantled." I look at him. "All I want to do is make Mommy proud of me. I want you all to be proud of me," I tell him, he face morphing into shock when I tell him that. I think he's a little disgusted at that, too.

"I used to be a Terminator, but I'm not any more. I'm a Tin Miss now, and I'm pleased about that. I'vechanged," I tell Derek. He's starting to stealthily draw out his gun. I slowly and clearly bring out my hand, and open it up. I have no choice. I have to do it. I have to silence him.

I focus my attention, and wish for a ball of energy to form in my hand. And one starts to swirl, building up in the centre of my palm in a silver toned whirlpool of power. It's not stable, and it quickly dissipates, but it's worked. Derek is looking at me, stunned.

"Not everything mechanical is evil. I'm not. Not now, anyway." He looks at me, shocked, suspicious and disbelieving.

"John had managed to fix my chip, but he hadn't removed the termination directive. I overrode it manually. I chose not to kill John. Once I was fully working, I could make that choice." He's staring at me, realising for the first time ever that I'm not the enemy. Not any more.

"I patrolled Serrano Point a couple of days before I was sent back. You're right... it's different. It's not armoured up, with extra facilities..." I look at Derek. "We both were part of the same war. We didn't have a choice in what we did. You hate me. I don't hate you." He's just staring. "I feel sorry for you. Skynet took away your family, your life... it programmed tremendous hate into you. I remember bits. Fragments of what I was prior to capture and reprogramming. I don't like who I was." I swallow hard. "I remember I had been in this bunker. I killed people. And I was happy. Because I hated them. I hated their existence. I understand why you hate me. Because that's what I was." His eyes are burning anger, his face a mask of pain.

"You have any idea what you mean to me?"

"Yes. I was your interrogator." His face dissolves into shock.

"I remember a room. It's dark. There's music playing. Chopin. Nocturne, I think. You were shoved inside the room." I swallow hard again. "I don't like what I was. Part of me feels something about Skynet. It's like child and parent." I hold his hand. "But you're my family. I'd die to protect my brother. You're family to me. No matter what sympathies I have for Skynet, I'm not letting it happen. Skynet must be stopped." I start to cry again. "I helped someone who was dying. I'd ended up back in time with them, and they'd been contaminated by the Temporal Displacement effect. As they were healing, the energy they were generating shocked my system when I touched her. It's altered me. It's made me aware of this planet more." I shake my head. "Its getting harder and harder for me to cope. To stay emotionless. To hide all this from you all. Because it all goes. It's all burnt away." I look at him dead in the eyes. He's staring back, the same haunted look that has to be in mine is staring back at me.

"We have to stop it, Uncle Derek. Not for John, not for anything... because we know too much. We have lived through that hell. And I want to go to the mall with you and eat until I throw up." He looks away.

"You're also like the Tin Man. You need a heart, too." He looks at me, flashing anger in his eyes. It's gone instantly, though. Because he's realising I'm not trying to trick him, or operate some scheme to serve Skynet by deception. He takes a slow, deep breath.

"When I look at you, I see the cold, soulless machine that wanted to know all it could about Allison." I look away, the name hauntingly familiar.

"Don't tell me any more. I don't want to be told. I need to work it out. I have nightmares. It might be around her." He's looking at me, confused.

"I go to stand-by mode. I have false memories when I do so. They have to be nightmares." He's looking at me, the revelation slowly hitting him hard. Suddenly, the door swings open, and Mommy is back. I quickly withdraw my hand, and that raises Mommy's suspicions.

"What's going on?" she asks, eyeing the pair of us.

"Derek was reminding me that I'm a Metal, and that he's good at dismantling machines. I was analysing his readings to assess whether his rant was calming him down. It did. There is a much reduced chance of him killing someone now." I lie fluidly. She's not really believing my lie, but she's got nothing to back up that doubt.

"Okay, then we need to go, Tin Miss. Managed to secure temp applications for us. Two Janitors just called in sick. Personal problems," she says with a small smile. She rigged it somehow. That's my Mommy for you.

I get out, and start to follow Mommy, turning back and giving Uncle Derek a small smile and a wink. As I turn around, I think I see a small smile start to form on his mouth.