Chapter 2: DARE TO GIVE UP?

A/N: I'm sorry this took a little bit longer than intended, but here is the next installment for our 40-day dare story. I hope you keep reading. Thank you to all those who take the time to review and comment, especially all the Guests who do. I truly appreciate you; I just wish I could reply to your reviews.


Day 3

Oliver was very excited upon reading the journal entry for the third day. "Love is thoughtful," it said. "I can do thoughtful," he said to himself with a grin on his face.

The day's dare had him contact his wife sometime during the business of the day with no agenda other than to ask how she was doing and if there was anything he could do for her that day. Oliver thought that the chances of Felicity picking up if he called her was nil, so he settled for a simple text that she would most probably read anyway, before even deciding on keeping it in her inbox or deleting it altogether. Hoping for some kind of response – no matter how brief or vague – he sent her the following text message:

"Hi! How's your day? Hope all is well. Anything I can do for you today?"

He waited for an answer all day. It never came.

Still Oliver persisted; in fact, he was so determined to press on that he read up on the dare for the following day in advance. He was sitting in his limo at the end of the day's work, holding the leather-bound notebook, and as soon as he read the next entry, he had Diggle tell the driver up front to make two side trips before heading home.


Day 4

"Love makes good impressions," the journal entry for the fourth day had said. Oliver was supposed to think of a specific way of greeting his wife, a greeting that would show her that he was thinking of her and that she mattered to him. The Scripture quote for the day spoke of "greeting one another with a kiss of love," but he was sure that kissing Felicity – something that he had absolutely been missing and craving for the longest time now – was out of the question at the moment, given the state of their relationship. In the limo the day before, he had thought of two very specific and concrete ways of intentionally and creatively greeting his wife the next day. One led him to a specialty store in the mall. The other led him to a commercial greenhouse on the other side of the city.

On the morning of the fourth day, Felicity arrived in her office and found another fern on her desk, one that matched the fern he had given her before, which was still sitting on the book shelf near the glass window. Beside the plant was a personalized signature red pen with her full, married name etched on it. There was a note written in his penmanship that accompanied his gifts. The note said:

"Have a great day in the office! Here's hoping that red and green still make you smile. Love, Oliver."

This time, Oliver did not expect any response. He just went ahead and did what he had to do. He figured he didn't have anything to lose but had everything to gain just by trying to make a good impression. He was right not to expect anything in return, because once again, no response ever came. "Tomorrow is another day," he sighed.


Day 5

Oliver hardly had any sleep because Green Arrow business the night before had taken longer and harder than expected, with the Team one hero less in stopping a heavily armed smuggling ring at the pier, since Diggle had to stay home with a very sick Sara while Lyla hand her hands full at ARGUS headquarters.

The sun hadn't come out yet, but Oliver was already awake as usual. So, even if the last couple of days had been quite discouraging, he decided to get up and begin reading the "dare diary" (as he had fondly come to call it). He turned on the lamp on his night table and began to read.

The fifth journal entry explained that whatever it is that you put your time, energy, and money into is what's most important to you. Loving someone involves investing in the very person you care about. That brought his thoughts back to when he and Felicity had been living a pretty normal, domestic life in Ivy Town. Back then, he was able to invest all the time, energy, and what little money he was able to scrimp and save from what was left of his trust fund after he had brought her to trips around the world. He took her out on dates, bought her simple to fancy gifts, cooked for her and tidied up the house on days she attended meetings with the board members of Palmer Tech after Ray had mysteriously disappeared (or allegedly died). He wasn't ashamed that he'd even spent time and energy painting her toe nails a few times.

Oliver smiled as he reminisced those times. Those were the times he enjoyed lengthy pillow talks with the love of his life. Those were the times he didn't mind listening to her talk for hours while he gazed on her beautiful blue eyes or her pretty pink lips. Those were the times he opened up to her, one little memory at a time, telling her some of the crazy things he'd done pre-Gambit, as well as a few, carefully selected deeds he'd regretted doing post-Gambit. Those were the times she listened with her heart, resting her head on his bare chest and tenderly tracing the scars on his torso, which became damp with her tears more than once.

They had given each other time, as well as their mutually undivided attention, and allowed themselves to deepen the intimacy of their relationship, which had begun to suffer as soon as they returned to Star City and rejoined the Team. Somehow they were able to revive that intimacy when they got married, but that was short-lived. Keeping the secret of his son from the one person he should have shared it with from the very beginning had ruined everything they had worked so hard to build together. Much as he hated to admit it, Oliver knew that he had trampled on the trust that they had both given time and energy to nurture and grow, and the guilt clawed on his soul ever since he gave Samantha Clayton his word. He knew he needed to regain that trust even if it meant starting from scratch.

"Love invests on who matters most," he had learned on day five.

Oliver looked at the digital clock on his night table and figured he had enough time to whip up a hearty breakfast before Felicity usually leaves for work. He sprung from his bed as if he were the Flash, put on a cotton shirt and sweatpants, and dashed to the kitchen to execute his plan. Thirty minutes later, a scrumptious breakfast for two was set on their table – at least, to him it was still theirs.

Felicity was lured into his delightful trap by the enticing smell of brewed coffee. Dressed for the office in her light pink, sleeveless peplum blouse and matching pencil skirt, she walked straight to the kitchen counter where the coffeemaker was, ignoring Oliver, who had just finished toasting bread. She poured some coffee into a keep-warm flask, intending to take it with her and drink it on the way to work.

As she turned around to leave, Oliver greeted her with a bright smile, "Good morning! I made breakfast. It's your favorite kind of omelet."

Felicity looked behind her at the delightfully set meal on the dining table. Her eyes widened in surprise, and her jaw dropped slightly. She couldn't remember the last time Oliver had made breakfast and served it so attractively like they did in Master Chef. Her thoughts flashed back to their Ivy Town days, especially that night when he had made soufflé and had hidden the engagement ring there to surprise her. For a moment there, there was a tiny smile forming on her face.

But that tiny smile soon fell, and it was replaced by a sullen expression. "I'm sorry," she responded sadly and softly, scratching her left temple as she spoke. "I… I have to go. I have a meeting in twenty minutes with the supervisors of HRD." And then she walked away.

But Oliver was ready. Just as Felicity headed towards the door, he called out, "Wait!"

She turned around and flashed him a puzzled look.

Oliver hurried towards her with a brown bag in his hand. "I packed some for you… just in case you were in a hurry to leave." There was a hesitant smile on his face as he reached forward and offered her the bag.

"No, it's okay. I'm good. You take it," was all she said before she walked out of the loft, leaving him downcast and disappointed.

Oliver sighed. He packed the breakfast in disposable food containers and brought them to the office for his staff to feast on during their morning coffee break.

Oliver didn't give up too easily, though. He did the same thing with dinner that night. He even picked up a bottle of cabernet on his way home and lit candles on the dinner table to make his Italian set menu more special. Felicity came home pretty early, and as soon as she entered the loft, Oliver invited her to join him for dinner before they headed to the lair. Separately.

"Oh… Thanks, but I'm not that hungry," she said plainly, indifference evident on her face. "I'm actually dead tired. Had a full day. I think I'm just going to go straight to bed. I hope… you don't mind if I don't join the Team later?"

"Uhm, it's fine. I'll just put everything in the fridge. If you're hungry later and decide to eat, you can just heat up some of this," Oliver replied patiently, pointing to the food on the table with his thumb. He held her gaze, looking straight into her gloomy blue eyes, expectantly waiting for an even slightly positive response.

But all she said was, "Okay, good night," and then she turned away and headed straight to her room without looking back. Oliver watched her walk away, his chest tightening as he felt sheer disappointment enveloping and wringing his heart. He bowed his head and closed his eyes as another weary sigh escaped his lips.

When he looked up again, however, he was surprised to see that Felicity had turned back and was now staring at him with a confused and somewhat annoyed expression on her face. "Oliver… What's going on?" she asked.

"What do you mean?" Oliver answered with a question of his own.

Felicity took a few steps towards him and answered, "These past few days, I… You've been…" She blinked and then asked confidently, "What's with all the thoughtful messages and gifts? Now it's breakfast… and then dinner. What are you trying to do exactly?"

"I… uhm…" Oliver cleared his throat and shifted his weight between his two feet. Of course, Oliver couldn't tell her about the dares. He didn't want her to misinterpret everything he had been doing. He didn't want to risk her thinking that this was all a game to him. But he had also promised her again and again that he wouldn't lie to her anymore. So, he decided to go with the bottom line – the truth.

Oliver pulled out his hands from his pockets, stood straight, and held his wife's gaze with pleading eyes as he spoke. "I've been trying to show you how much I really love you. Because I still do. And I'm still hoping you would find it in your heart to forgive me and… and give me one more chance. I love you, Felicity. Very much."

Felicity stood frozen and silent as tears welled up in her eyes. When Oliver took a step towards her, she instinctively took a step back, biting her lower lip as a sign of the misgivings that clouded her judgment. As a teardrop slid down her cheek, she said softly yet stubbornly, "Oliver, I've already told you. There's no fixing this. There's no fixing us. It's just a matter of time before I figure out exactly how this has to end amicably… because it has to… for both our sakes. We can't live like this forever. I can't."

"Then don't," Oliver responded just as determinedly. "We can start over."

"We can't start over. Because. It's. Over," Felicity argued emphatically, her voice slightly stronger than before.

"Not for me," Oliver countered just as emphatically but more gently. His eyes had also become glassy with tears.

"Oliver…" His name left her mouth in an exasperated whisper. "We have to let each other go."

"I don't want to let you go."

"Well, you have to. Because I'm already gone."

"Felicity, I can't stop you from leaving, if that's what you want. But don't ask me to stop loving you. Because I never will."

"Love? What is love without mutual trust? I trusted you… with everything. But your choice to lie to me all that time? It shattered trust into a million pieces, and I don't think love is enough to put those pieces back together. I'm sorry, Oliver. Please… just… just let me go and learn to un-love me. Because I'm not sure if I'm ever going to be capable of loving you back. I'm not sure I even want to. Because loving you back again and again despite the lies… hurts too much. And I don't want to keep hurting anymore than I already am."

And there it was – the near-fatal blow that stabbed him straight through the heart. It wasn't because she had rejected him and the love he still offered her; it was because of the stark realization that he was causing her so much pain than he could ever imagine. If only to stop her anguish, he would give her what she asked for and let her go, but then that would, in turn, most certainly be the death of him.

An eternity of silence passed in which neither of them moved a muscle. Neither of them could look the other in the eye. As soon as Felicity turned and walked away, Oliver's tears fell.

He cleared the table without eating a bite of the meal he had lovingly prepared. He had lost his appetite and didn't want to eat alone. Again.

Before he left to join the Team that night, he thought to call Walter Steele. He badly needed someone to talk to, and his former stepfather was more than willing to lend him a listening ear. Their talk had been brief; in fact, his weeping had taken longer. But by the time the call ended, Oliver had mustered whatever hope and courage was left in him to open the dare diary and read up on the next day's challenge in advance.

Oliver had decided that he wouldn't dare give up so easily and so early in the challenge. Walter had suggested that perhaps he just needed to adjust his strategy. So later that night in the lair, Oliver pulled Thea aside after the Team returned from a rather uneventful patrol. He needed her help for tomorrow's dare.


A/N: I know we've all been bearing with the angst in season 4 so far, but it can't be avoided here because it's part of the rising action needed to spice up the story and keep it moving forward. Don't worry, the fluff and romance will be worth the wait... and the agony. As always, it would be nice to hear from you. Thanks for reading and following.