A/N: For Johntel who lets me write my own stories.
Sheldon Cooper often referred to Penny Queen as 'the most aggravating point of chaos in my life". He could not figure out how to put her in one of his little boxes, how to properly label her, or define her. So he didn't. He simply allowed one single individual to exist in his otherwise pristine world of structured order, of Entropy, but now, despite his complete acceptance of the process of Transference, there was another, and his closed system became chaotic. The need for order outweighed common sense with disastrous results.
Chapter Four
He became aware of two snakes hissing somewhere near his feet and he became incredibly still, hoping they would slither away and leave him in this delicious fog of unthinkingness.
He lay in his bed trying to make sense of the hissing that finally transmogrified into speech.
"…became so agitated at your sudden appearance that I had to order a light sedative. I cannot allow you to remain and must ask you to leave. He thinks he's cured but, if anything was demonstrated by your appearance, it's that he's almost as bad off now as when I first examined him."
"He's my friend, my best friend and – " she started but the shorter, feisty psychiatrist was quick to cut her off.
"Ms. Queen, your departure was the tipping point that ultimately ended up with him losing his sense of structure and position in a world he cannot live in. You saw how he reacted. I must insist you leave immediately."
Penny felt a fisson of guilt but mashed it down as quickly as she'd felt it and recognized it for what it was.
"I moved. I distupted his precious schedule." Penny didn't mean to belittle or dismiss the doctor's comments but she did. "Look, I work in L.A. and I need to live closer to my job. I'm an actress and finally got – "
"Yes, I daresay I know more about you and your ambitions from sessions with Shel – with my patient, than anyone else. In many respects, you were the center of his universe because you didn't fit anywhere else. Imagine the one thing you rely on more than anything else suddenly disappearing from your world. How would you feel? Now, multiply that by some huge number – that's how he felt."
"It's not my fault he put me in the center. I didn't ask for that. We were just friends, best friends, and a normal person would have understood why I had to move but no, not Dr. Whackadoodle, not him. He even offered to buy me a car if I'd stay." She was on a roll, not really thinking, not even guessing, how her words might hurt.
"He's not normal by your standards, he's – "
"Boy, you can say that again. He's selfish and self-centered. He's a bag of nuts six feet tall. He even folds his dirty laundry! I mean, how nuts is that? And he has his precious spot and he needs his food a certain way and he never lets me forget for one minute how stupid I am and – "
"He sings to you, lends you money without interest or a timeframe for repayment, he helped you start a business that died because you didn't apply yourself to it! He thinks the world of you. He is not nuts, he's just different and his issues - "
The two women were toe-to-toe and about to come to blows when Sheldon finally had had enough. He had tears in his eyes and anger in his heart and he reacted as only someone with issues such as his could.
Sheldon lurched out of bed and angrily shoved the two combatants out of the room. He slammed the door, shoved the guest chair under the handle as he'd once seen in a movie and retreated to the bathroom and locked the door. His fist smashed into the mirror and he pulled out one of the largest shards in the frame.
His mother and dad had fought like that and he'd hidden under the bed because invariably he would be used as a bludgeon by one against the other. Two people he loved using him to hurt one another. The parallels were not lost on someone with an IQ of 187. He was brilliant and his overwhelming need for structure and order had brought them all to this point in time.
I am Chaos in their worlds. I am the one who brings them misery and pain through my selfish need for homeostasis. The needs of the many…
He felt sudden resolve and calm. It was so simple. Remove Chaos and Order follows. The closed system would once again be in balance. The world wasn't ready for Homo novus so the obvious solution was to remove himself from it.
He knew his anatomy. He made the long slice down his inner forearm lacerating the interior antebrachial vein. It didn't hurt, such was his state of mind aided by the drugs that coursed through his veins. The slices in his palm and fingers didn't hurt either. He stood leaning forward slightly with his arm over the sink since he had no desire to ultimately lie in a pool of his own coagulating blood. He smiled, changed hands and drew a long incision down the other arm and closed his eyes.
Stunned and suddenly having a focus for her anger, Penny pounded on the door and shouted for Sheldon to quit acting like a child and open the door.
Moira knew what had happened and a terribly cold fear clutched at her heart and she shouted for an orderly. "Move or I'll have you arrested!" she said, pushing Penny aside and shoving at the door with her shoulder. Penny lent her weight to the little psychiatrist but the door wouldn't budge.
The orderly smashed against the door like a lineman against a tackling dummy and the chair clattered across the room as the door flew open with a crash.
"Bathroom! He's in the bathroom!" shouted Moira, ignoring Penny and directing the lineman at the door. He didn't try the knob. He knew what the psych section's patients were likely to do and he wasn't going to have that on his watch. He splintered the lock with one massive kick and the door flew open again and he assessed the situation at a glance and scooped Sheldon up like a baby and carried him to the bed.
Penny was just standing there watching as the orderly straightened out Sheldon's limbs and Moira used towels from the bathroom to put pressure on the long bleeding slashes. The orderly lifted a cover and mashed the red button that signaled a medical emergency.
Oh, God, so much blood! Penny retreated to a corner of the room and almost hid while medical personnel and staff wheeled in IV stands and monitoring equipment and carts full of electronic equipment.
A/N: Short but I am pressed for time.
