Technology hates my fanfics. Its offical. My internet has been out since Monday night and only returned today. I blame Hermes. So this is a bit late. But well worth the wait. Rewriting the Future will be updated as soon as I manage to finish it.

Quick question.

Do you guys want me to PM you review answers?

Disclaimer: I don't own anything but Jag. And she is fucking kickass. Though can I please own Percy's B-day presents?

Percy slowly dragged himself into the other room, his eyes glued to the photograph of his father holding onto his newborn self, with such love and pride in his eyes. His brain felt like Silly String as he tried to process all he'd learned so far.

One: He had two older brothers. Two crazy, slightly dickish mermaid in Triton's case, but still amazing older brothers.

Two: His Dad was in fact not dead. His mother had only been lying to him his whole entire life.

Three: His big brother was a mermaid.

Four: He had a slightly clingy nephew that seemed to like randomly pouncing on him for hugs.

Five: His Dad was Poseidon. An immortal God of the Sea. One of his brothers was a guy who got in a fight with a giant hamburger and won. The other could turn into a mermaid.

Six: He was being blamed along with his Dad for stealing a weapon from the crazy guy who wanted him and Nico dead.

Yeah, his life was majorly screwed up. He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't notice Triton standing in the doorway until he crashed into his solid chest. Triton steadied him, running a soothing hand through his hair.

"Easy little one. No one is going to take your photo away. But if you don't hurry up I think Nico is going to steal your presents." Triton smiled as he watched Percy blush and carefully tuck the photo into his pocket. He stepped aside and allowed Percy to enter the sitting room where Theseus and Nico had dragged his presents. He grinned, pleased when he saw the boy's eyes light up as he took in the pile of presents.

Theseus was kneeling beside the largest box and frowning as he knocked on cardboard. "Shit..."

Nico glanced at his father. "I told you to put more air holes."

"I didn't think it needed that much air." Theseus complained as he prodded the box again with his ear pressed against the side.

"You killed his present?" Triton groaned as Percy paled and looked between his brothers.

Theseus shushed him as he knocked again before grinning. "I hear movement. We're good."

"What did you get me?" Percy asked curiously, eyeing the box that was as tall as his head and as wide as his arms. It was wrapped in shiny azure blue wrapping paper and done up with a green bow. Along the sides he could see a line of holes poked through the cardboard.

"You'll see. It's the big gift which means you have to sit there and stare at it's amazingness while opening the boring gifts Triton gives you and the other cool gifts I got you."

"I wanna go first Daddy!" Nico whined, sending pleading puppy dog eyes at his father.

"Of course Angel." Theseus smiled fondly at his hyperactive son as Nico bounded over to the pile and selected a small lumpy package from the top clumsily wrapped in black wrapping paper. Nico bounced over to Percy and tackled hugged him. Percy smiled as he returned the hug though not quite as enthusiastically, not that Nico noticed as he offered up his gift. Percy took it and happily ripped off the wrapping paper only to gasp as he saw the gift. It was simple but all the more beautiful for it. A thick black leather band similar to a wrist watch with a carved human skull charm made out of some strange black metal and inlaid with bits of silver.

"Do you like it? The charm is Stygian Iron which is special in my Papa's kingdom. Most minor monsters from the Underworld will hesitate to attack you if you wear it. They know only my siblings and me or our friends have charms with that metal. It even matches mine." Nico held out his hand to show Percy an identical skull design on a ring.

"Thank you so much Nico. I love it." Percy happily held out his wrist and allowed Nico to buckle the bracelet on his right wrist before he tugged the Son of Hades into a tight hug.

It was Nico's turn to blush as he returned the hug. "Glad you like it. I hope it protects you."

"It should help at least. Creatures like hellhounds which rely mainly on scent shouldn't bother him if they smell the metal of the Underworld on him. No sane person would carry that cursed material." Triton grumbled from where he was leaning on the wall.

"I guess I'm not sane then." Percy commented as he ran his fingers over the icy surface of the skull.

"Unsurprising with father's genes." Triton muttered but he did push away from the wall and select a black jewelry box from the top and toss it to Percy. "Since we are giving jewelry."

Percy smiled at his big brother and opened the box. Nestled inside was a carved piece of blue-green coral in the shape of a rearing pegasus on a golden chain.

"That necklace makes you an official Sea Prince. We all wear one." Triton explained and lifted up his own conch shell charm as Theseus showed off his Trident charm. "If you are ever in danger and far from water you can channel the ocean through the coral." Triton explained as Percy slipped it over his head.

"Thank you Triton. It's great." Percy stepped forward and gave Triton a slightly awkward hug before pulling back quickly.

"Please it's a cruddy gift next to mine." Theseus moved towards the boxes and selected a green wrapped box the size of a toaster and handed it to Percy.

The demigod tore it open only to squeak as he came across a framed photo and a pair of silver car keys.

The picture showed a 1970 Mustang Boss 302 Fastback painted blue with black British racing stripes across the hood including the black hood scope combined with its standard black Boss striping and black spoiler. All black leather interior peaked out through her gleaming windows.

"I know you are a bit young to drive but I figured I could get you a fake ID or something." Thes laughed as he got an armful of Sea Prince.

"Thank you so much! I love it. Thank you, thank you." Percy practically crushed him with his hug.

"Eh, it's no biggy. I picked her up from a salvage yard in South Dakota a few years back. I wanted the black Impala but the guy wouldn't sell her so I got stuck with this girl. She's not really my thing but I figured I'd restore her and give her to the least annoying of my siblings. Which happens to be you. She's in my warehouse right now but you can go see her later."

"You gave a twelve year old a car?" Triton asked his eyes wide.

"Sure. He's not allowed to drive her alone or anything but she will be a great learning experience for him. Nico has his own Trans Am and he's quite happy with it."

"Did anyone ever tell you that you spoil children?"

Theseus shrugged and nodded at the presents. "Try and beat my gifts big bro."

"How did you turn this into a competition?"

Theseus only blinked innocently. Triton huffed as he tossed Percy another package. "Does this beat Theseus's car?"

Percy opened the box and frowned. "You got me a leash?" He asked.

"Dude I called dibs on the kinky stuff." Theseus whined.

"Idiot."Triton muttered before he snagged the leash back from Percy and stalked into his bedroom. He returned a few moments later with a beautiful black and tan German Shepherd on his heels. The dog instantly sat down the moment Triton stopped and looked intently at Triton, clearly waiting for its next command.

"Percy meet Jag. She's your new Schutzhund trained German Shepherd. Hopefully she can keep you alive."

"What trained?" Percy asked as he held out his hand to the golden tan dog with a black muzzle and black "saddle" markings on her back. She sniffed his hand calmly before looking back at Triton.

"Protection and tracking trained." Triton explained as Percy started to stroke her beautiful head. "I bought her from a kennel in California that imported her from Germany."

"Isn't Jag a boy's name?" Nico asked from Theseus's lap.

"It's the name she knows. It must be normal for a German female." Triton shrugged as he scratched her ears only to make a face as Percy hugged him tightly.

"Thank you Triton. She's amazing."

"Of course. I picked her out for you. She might be a bit distant until she warms up to you. But she should bond to you quickly enough. Try giving her some commands." He pulled a piece of paper out of the box. "She's trained to German commands. Here is what she already knows."

Percy glanced at the list and made a face as he struggled to read it. But finally he managed to make out a few commands.

"Jag heir!" He ordered as Triton unclipped the leash. Instantly Jag trotted to his side and focused on him. "Good girl."

"No, tell her so brav. That's what she knows as good dog."

"So brav." Percy repeated obediently and the beautiful Shepherd licked his hand her tail wagging slightly.

Growing slightly more confident he tried another command. "Sitz!"

Instantly she sank down so she was sitting, ears perked up at him. "So brav." He cooed, petting her. Jag licked his hand again.

"Alright fuss!" He shouted before taking off. Jag leapt after him and heeled instantly, running alongside him with ease. He giggled as he scrambled over the couch and Jag stayed right on his heels. Nico laughed and raced after the pair even as Triton and Theseus watched in amusement as they tore around the room.

Finally the boys calmed down enough to slide to a stop in front of the older men or in Nico's case leap into his father's arms. Theseus swung his son around before watching as Percy praised Jag before looking at Theseus's expectantly.

"Where is my next present?"

Theseus snicked. "Getting greedy little one." He shifted Nico in his arms so he could snag another present and hand it over to Percy. Nico whined and wrapped his arms tighter around his father's neck as he was shuffled. Theseus kissed his hair, shushing him.

Percy happily ripped the paper off to reveal a sheathed hunting knife. Curious he drew the blade, studying the odd metal and the even odder almost bonelike handle. He turned his attention to the sheath and noticed the leather had scales on it almost like alligator skin but was pure black.

"Do you like? The blade is Celestial bronze. Which is one of only three metals that can kill monsters. The handle is carved from the horn of the Minotaur that I killed. And the sheath is made of drakon skin. My best friend and lover Pirithous helped me kill one." Theseus set Nico on the ground. "Angel, go get your knife."

"Okay Daddy!" Nico bounded off, jumping over Jag who was lying quietly in the corner on a rug. He returned seconds later with an identical knife clutched in his hand.

Triton eyed the twin blades warily. "Theseus. Do you really think it's wise to give them those blades?"

Theseus chewed his lip as he ran his fingers through Nico's hair, smiling as his son cuddled into his side. "Yes." Sighing he knelt in front of Percy and Nico laying one hand on each of their shoulders.

"Those knives are special." Theseus explained. "There are four of them. Two are mine. Two belong to Pithy. All identical except for mine are marked with a carving of a Trident and Pithy's has a lightning bolt since his Dad is asshole Zeus. These blades are...temperamental. They were forged by Aphrodite Goddess of Love. Which means you do not fuck around with these blades. I gave Nico his blade this morning."

"Get to the point Theseus. I do not want Percy near that blade without him knowing it's past." Triton growled.

"I'm getting there." Thes huffed before biting his lip. "I wielded the knives you now hold. And my lover the other two. When Aphrodite created the blades, she was wielding her magic to create blades designed for only lovers. She wanted to choose the people who got them herself but the blades have a bit of a mind of their own. They chose Pirithous and me. So she fitted the blades for our knife handles and we carried them for years. But I dunno about 11 years ago. Right around the time someone was born." Thes ruffled Nico's hair. "The blades weren't too happy that I cheated on Pithy and had a child with another. Last time I tried to use mine, they sorta tried to stab my dick."

Triton snorted. "Pirithous holding them and stabbing at your crotch might have helped the knives out a wee bit."

Theseus ignored him. "The blades magic refuses to allow either of us to use them anymore. I talked to Aphrodite and she believes Pithy and I breaking up must have shatter our bond with the blades. She suggested I give them to you two."

"I'm not dating Nico!" Percy shouted, blushing.

"Yeah Daddy. We aren't lovers. So the knives won't work for us." Nico mumbled.

"That's part of the magic that broke. The fact you can touch the blades proves that it's not only lovers who can use them anymore. Before if someone other than Pithy and I touched my knives they'd feel as if they'd stuck their hand in boiling water. So you two are fine to wield them. And the knives have plenty of other powers that will help you out."

"Thanks Thes." Percy smiled weakly at his brother who patted his head. Nico gave him a reassuring smile as he buckled the knife onto his belt. Percy chewed his lip, not at all comfortable with this gift. He didn't like the idea of sharing a blade meant for lovers with Nico. That just didn't sound like it was going to end well. But Theseus seemed quite pleased with himself and it would be rude to reject it. So Percy pushed the matter aside and looked at Triton who handed him another jewelry box.

"I hate to give you more jewelry but some monsters might be smart enough to remove your necklace since its obviously connected to the sea. So I didn't dare put the enchantments on the coral. So you will have to make do with another bit of jewelry."

Percy opened the box and smiled as he saw the black diving watch and his grin widened as he realized that the display had been modified. Instead of the usual grayish background with black lettering the screen now showed a black background with white digital letters.

"I'm hoping the display will make it easier for you to use. I know it's suppose to be better for dyslexia." Triton explained. "There is also a tiny piece of coral inside the watch near the battery that I had Hecate weave the enchantments on."

"What enchantments?" Percy asked as he struggled to buckle the watch on his left wrist. Nico silently reached out and did it up for him.

"Nothing much. If you are ever in danger and need me you just tap the watch twice and whisper TrĂ­aina. The coral in the watch is connected to my necklace. It will make my necklace burn red hot to alert me that you need my help." Triton told him. "Try it."

Percy hesitated."What does trĂ­aina mean?"

"It's Greek. It means..."

"Trident."Percy murmured, blinking slowly as the answer seemed to just appear in his head.

"Good boy. As you know Father's sacred weapon is the Trident. He in fact named me after his weapon. The same weapon I wield."

Thes snorted. "Dad has some serious creativity issues."

Satisfied with the explanation Percy taped the watch face and murmured the word. Though his happiness quickly turned to worry as Triton jumped about a foot in the air and cursed as he held his conch shell charm away from his skin. The coral glowed cherry red like a coal in a fire and even from several feet away Percy could feel the heat rolling off of the coral. Triton muttered something under his breath and the coral instantly cooled only for Triton to yelp as he got an electric shock from the necklace as he let it touch his skin.

Theseus snickered. "That's a bit overkill.I guess Hecate is still pissed at you for running screaming from her bed. Really shouldn't have lead her on bro."

Triton glared at the Athenian Prince. "You are the idiot who got me drunk and then tied me naked to her bed."

"Hey, you needed to get laid bro. That pent up sexual frustration is going to lead to bad things. Like your dick falling off. Or you getting so damn horny you pounce on me!" Theseus frowned. "Wait, that would be kinda hot. So on second thought keep denying yourself sex so I get to see if you are as good in bed as the rumors have said." Theseus nuzzled his face into Triton's chest pouting slightly as his big brother pushed him away.

"Stop being a fucking pervert for once in your life Theseus. I'd never touch my siblings in that way and you know it. I don't give a shit what you get up to with Sciron and Chrysaor but I am having no part of it."

"Prude." Theseus pouted but tossed Percy the next present on the pile.

Percy pulled the box open and smiled when he saw a black leather jacket.

"It's made of drakon leather. It's super rare and a bitch to find. Do not fuck that up." Theseus told him as Nico helped Percy put it on. "It's supposed to help block demigod scent. No idea if it actually works but Sea Princes look sexy as hell in drakon leather."

"Thanks Thes." Percy bounced forward to hug his big brother only to be pulled into Triton's side.

"Please that is nothing next to my next gift." Triton handed over another box and Percy happily sat down to open it. Triton carded his hands through Percy's hair as the boy unwrapped a laptop.

"Laptops won't put out a deacon for monsters unlike cell phones and this way if we are separated you can still stay in contact with me." Triton braced himself for the tackle hug and wasn't disappointed as Percy happily snuggled him.

"Oh, and I spoil him." Theseus muttered as he watched Nico open the box and begin to examine the laptop. "Oi! Out of Percy's presents Angel. I buy you enough stuff."

"He can use it. I don't mind." Percy smiled at Nico who beamed at him before sticking his tongue out at Thes.

Thes flicked his son's nose. "Brat."

"Your the one who said that if I wasn't a troublemaker that you wouldn't believe I was your son." Nico piped in as he powered on the laptop.

Theseus rolled his eyes at his son but quickly turned to Triton. "Give him your last present. My next two go together."

Triton frowned. "Do I want to know what you got our sweet innocent baby brother?"

Theseus only smirked and patted the large box. "You'll see."

Triton sighed but pointed at his own large present. "Go see Perseus."

Percy bounced happily forward, oblivious to the death glares Triton was sending at Theseus as he tore open the wrapping paper to reveal a beautiful set of armor, carved with a trident on the breastplate and made of the same odd metal as his new knife.

"Thanks Triton." Percy murmured softly as he noticed Nico eying the armor with interest. But his attention was quickly focused on the big box which was starting to shake slightly. Theseus frowned as he smacked the cardboard. "Stop that!" He scolded.

"Can I open it?" Percy asked his excitement growing as he fidgeted in place, eyes locked on the gift.

"Sure! Your other gift is sorta attached to him." Theseus's hand crept towards his sword as he watched Percy eagerly tear in the wrapping paper.

Several moments passed as Percy struggled to reach the top of the box to undo the flaps. He squeaked softly as Triton came up behind him and lifted him into the air. He tilted his head back and blushed but happily went back to work. Triton smiled as he saw the innocent excitement on Percy's face but he kept shooting glances at Theseus who looked far to smug for this present to be anything good. Nico was peeking out from behind Theseus's legs which didn't reassure him at all. The kid was far too nosy to not be underfoot even if he obviously knew what was in the box. For him to be keeping his distance wasn't normal.

Percy though had managed to get the wrapping paper and was struggling with the he pulled his new knife from his belt and squirmed to be set down. As Triton obeyed he began to carefully cut the cardboard until he made a nice little opening in the side.

As the cardboard opening fell away they all got a good look at what was inside and Theseus wisely bolted as Triton turned on him with a murderous snarl.

Because struggling pathetically in the box was a handsome young man of around nineteen, with sandy blonde hair that was sexily tousled and angry sky blue eyes. He was naked except for a tight fitting pair of black leather underwear that left nothing to the imagination. Well naked unless you counted the red ball gag secured in his mouth and the furry green handcuffs that held his arms behind his back, and a black leather dog collar with attached leash, with a dangling silver dog tag that read "Luke". Oh and a steady trickle of blood, some of it already dried, matting his hair and part of the right side of his face, nearly covering a long pale scar.

Admit it. That is the sexiest Lukey entrance of all time. Even if Theseus is dead meat next chapter when Luke gets free. I really want Percy's birthday presents. Review please and let me know what you think!

Car: 1970 Mustang Boss 302 Fastback Grabber Blue