Chapter 4

Renee finishes chatting with her friends and decides to call her wedding planner to ask about booking the ranch that portrayed Southfork. However Renee gets things mixed up a bit.

Renee: "Hello Marie! Yes dahling I'd just love to book Southfork for a little old party and so I'd love to know if it's availible, if you will."

Marie: "Southfork letz zee...hmmm, where is diz Zouthfork?"

Renee: "It's in Texas Marie. Outside Dallas, Texas. Just ask Larry Hagman, he should know."

Marie: "Laree Hag-man? Okee I will vind out. I will call vous back."

(a few minutes pass)

Renee: "Hello? Oh yes Marie so what did you find out? Did Larry say it was okay to come over?"

Marie: "Laree Hag-man says dat he doez not own Zouthfork."

Renee: "What I thought that he surely owned Southfork!" "What else did he say?"

Marie: "He called me a little French maid and asked if my name was Jeannie and if I wanted to come over and rub hiz lamp..."

Renee: "OMG Marie I hope you said 'No'!?"

Marie: "Of course! I'm not zat stupid!"

Renee: "Anyway I thought for sure he owned it! I know give me his number and I'll call him myself."

Marie: "Okee but I'll say I didn't warn you! It's 555-55...."

Renee gets the number from Marie, thanks her and then hangs up with Marie and decides to call Larry.

Larry: "Howdy this is ol' Lar, what can a do ya fer?"

Renee: "Hullo Larry I would like to ask you if I could use your ranch, Southfork, for my weddin' on Christmas..."

Larry: "Sure little gal but I don't own Southfork honey. Still though you can swing by my place any time Jeannie."

Renee: "I'm not Jeannie! Anyway it's too bad you don't own Southfork!"

Larry: "Well you're not Jeannie but I think I can make a deal. I know the people who own Southfork, so I'll give them a call and straighten things out and you can have your little ol' weddin' there if you want to."

Renee: "Oh that would be great Larry! Just reserve it under J & R and that would be fab-u-lous!" "My number is..."

Larry: "Alright I'll do it for ya. J & R hmm, that sounds familiar?..."

Renee: "Talk to you later, bye!"

Renee hangs up right when Jack is walking in.

Jack: "Hi Renee, I hope I wasn't disturbing you or anything."

Renee: "Hi Jackee poo! No you weren't disturbing me at all hunny bunny! In fact things are great! I talked to my friends and they just can't wait to meet you, a real life music star. They've also arranged some people to be your groomsmen if your friends don't work out."

Jack: "Your friends' friends as my groomsmen? I already asked my nephew Ben, and Miller and..."

Renee: "Well those guys are nice enough, but the guys my friends have in mind would do just fine as well. Anyway I already booked 'Southfork' for our wedding so now everything will be just fabulous, that's for sure!"

Jack: "Southfork? Are you SURE Renee? I thought Southfork was just the ranch on the Dallas TV show?"

Renee: "Well I spoke to Larry Hagman and he said that he'll arrange everything as far as the venue goes. Oooh this will be so cool!"

Jack: "If you say so. Anyway I have something to tell you about our getting married."

Renee: "Sure just follow me to my gym and we can talk while I workout on the treadmill. Actually Jack you should try too because you could use a workout as well."

Jack: "I'll just stick with what I do."

Renee: "Aw come on hunny poo a little exercise will do you good...and maybe afterward I'll give you a little exercise of my own tee hee."

Jack: "All right maybe I'll try a couple of your dumb bells while you walk."

So they go to the gym and Renee immediately gets on the treadmill and begins a brisk walk and Jack reluctantly picks up a dumb bell weight and tries an arm curl while he talks to Renee.

Jack: "Well Renee remember how I said I had something to say?'

Renee: "Yeah..."

Jack: "Well today, I talked to Meg and she said that she's getting married to her boyfriend Roger because she thinks that she's pregnant."

Rene: "Oh that's nice."

Jack: "But I don't know, she barely knows the guy. I meaan they haven't been dating that long..."

Renee: "Oh you're always the protective one. She can do what she wants. If she wants to get married she can. As long as it doesn't interfere with my..our big day."

Jack: "Well I guess, but I dunno I guess I'm just used to being each other's protector."

Renee: "Well if you feel that way, maybe she can be a part of our wedding. Sort of as an associate bridesmaid or something. Does that sound fine?"

Jack: "Yeah I guess so, though it's up to her whether or not she wants to be your bridesmaid."

Renee: "I'm sure she'll agree with my terms, they should be quite reasonable indeed." "Hmm, Jack have you ever heard of Rumplestilskin?"

Jack: "Renee you've got to be kidding!"

Renee: "Why do you think so?" "Anyway are you ready for your real workout now? I'm know I'm primed and ready to go!"

Jack: "I think I'm going to be sick." And he runs off holding his mouth in disgust.

Renee: "I was just kidding Jack...although if you are gonna be sick, the bathroom's the second door on the right. And please don't hit my parquet bamboo wood floors, I've just had them buffed and it cost a for-tune!"