Chapter Four
Bobby listened numbly as the woman on the line told him which hospital Dean was in but refused to give further details about the eldest Winchester's condition. Bobby thanked the woman-probably Dean's own doctor- and hung up phone.
He swiped his baseball cap off and scratched at his head.
"Balls," he muttered, replacing the hat.
What was he going to do? He needed to go to the hospital, see exactly what kind of injuries Dean had sustained and perhaps drive the idjit back here but he sure as hell couldn't leave Sam on his own. And Bobby didn't trust anyone else to look after the boy while he was gone.
That was it then, Bobby would take Sam with him. It was the only thing to do.
Preparing himself, the veteran hunter walked into the living room, frowning at the sight of the young man on the couch exactly as he had left him. Curled up and staring out the window, Sam didn't react when Bobby came close.
"Son?" Bobby said quietly, "You alright?"
The young man stared right through the veteran hunter.
"Listen Sam," Bobby knelt down in front of the youngest Winchester, looking into his placid face, "I gotta go an' get yer idjit brother and you have to come with me."
Sam didn't react. Bobby sighed and rubbed a hand over his beard.
"We're gonna get Dean, son," he explained, "You and me."
Bobby reached out and grasped Sam's head, one hand on either side of his face.
"You hearin' me? Dean. We're gonna go to Dean," Bobby spoke, his nose only inches from Sam's.
The older man shook his head, released Sam and stood, realizing that he wasn't going to get through to the youngster.
Turning his back, Bobby glared out the bay window for a long moment, jumping in fright when he felt a touch on his sleeve. Sam stood behind him, one hand clutched in the sleeve of Bobby's plaid shirt.
The veteran hunter raised an eyebrow, "You ready to come along?"
Sam didn't respond but he didn't let go of Bobby's shirt either. The grizzled hunter took that as a yes and walked purposefully towards the front door before Sam could change his mind.
Bobby bent down as best he could and helped Sam put his sneakers on, tying them tightly. He grabbed the boy's jacket off the coat rack and brought it along, knowing Dean would have his head if Sam ended up getting a cold because he wasn't dressed warmly enough.
Sam followed behind Bobby as he stepped outside, making a bee-line for his old pickup truck. Making his way to the passenger side, Bobby pried Sam's hand off his sleeve and gestured the young man inside. Sam stared at him for a long moment. Bobby sighed; he knew the truck wasn't the Impala but it was the only vehicle he had running.
"S'alright son," Bobby coaxed, and gave Sam a little push.
Sure the pickup sat higher than the classic Chevy but for a guy of Sam's height, it shouldn't be a problem.
The young man blinked at Bobby and then turned to face the interior of the truck. He grabbed the inside door handle and pulled himself up, his movements uncoordinated and slow.
Once Sam was seated comfortably Bobby closed the door gently and rounded the front of the truck to the driver's side. Bobby couldn't help but worry about both Winchesters; he was afraid of what condition Dean would be in when they arrived at the hospital in Davidston and how Sam would react if his older brother wasn't well enough to interact with him.
These boys are gonna be the death of me, Bobby thought irritably as he climbed into the driver's seat and closed the door.
He glanced over at Sam as he turned the key in the ignition and reached over to take hold of the young man's seat belt.
"No need to tempt fate," Bobby muttered as he buckled Sam in and smiled at the youngest Winchester.
Sam was staring out the windshield, paying the older hunter no mind.
Bobby gripped the steering wheel with white knuckles and pulled out of the driveway, the truck coughing loudly.
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The veteran hunter could not help but glance at Sam from the corner of his eye every few seconds. He didn't like the young man's silence, it unnerved him that the boy was so quiet. Not that Sam had been a chatterbox but by now he should be venting his anger and worry for Dean. This Sam was completely closed off to Bobby. He had no idea what the young man was thinking.
Sam's expression betrayed nothing. His brow was smooth, his eyes were clear, his mouth set in a ambiguous line.
Bobby stopped two hours outside of Sioux Falls, to stretch his own cramped legs and to allow Sam the chance to do the same. The veteran hunter pulled into a small gravel parking lot outside of a picnic and rest-area. There were a half-dozen wooden picnic tables scattered around the hillside and a brick-sided public restroom sitting at the edge of grass.
A red sedan and a dark green mini van were the only other vehicles in the lot. Bobby caught sight of a young couple and a family of five sitting at separate picnic tables, enjoying lunch.
The old hunter stepped out of his pickup truck and opened the door for Sam, unbuckling him at the same time.
"C'mon out," Bobby smiled at the young man and Sam immediately grabbed at his shirt sleeve. Bobby allowed Sam to hold onto his sleeve as he led the way to the restroom.
The grizzled hunter watched the occupied picnic tables with a leery eye. He knew now how Dean felt when he spoke about taking Sam to those restaurants they had visited on their way to the Salvage Yard; wary of what people were thinking of the youngest Winchester.
The two hunters were far enough away that any conversation coming from the direction of the tables was too quiet to hear. Bobby sighed and tugged Sam along, perhaps with a little more force than necessary, slamming the restroom door open as he went.
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"Two more hours, Sam," Bobby muttered to himself as he started the pickup and drove out of the parking lot, having met with no civilians on the way. The owners of both the sedan and mini van had remained at their picnic tables.
Bobby pressed his foot down hard on the accelerator, wanting only to get to the hospital.
How was he going to get Sam into see Dean without someone stopping them, asking about the young man? Clearly something was off about Sam, his placid, vacant expression would tell anyone right away that he was not in control of all his faculties.
"Cross that bridge when you get to it, Singer," Bobby grumbled and turned on the radio, grimacing when the ZZ Top song 'Le Grange' came on but he didn't turn it off. He could use some noise to cut through the mind-numbing silence in the truck.
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Here goes, Bobby thought as he turned the engine of the pickup off, staring at the whitewashed bulk of Davidston General Hospital before him.
Sam leaned forward, placing both hands on the dashboard, as though somehow he knew that Dean was just beyond those sliding double-doors.
Bobby exited the pickup and hurried over to the passenger's side, opened the door and unbuckled Sam's seatbelt.
"Alright son," he told the young man as Sam fisted his hand in his shirtsleeve, "When we get in there, you just let me do the talking."
Sam smiled softly and Bobby grimaced in response. His old heart was pounding in his chest, hoping that Dean was not cooling on a slab in the morgue at the moment.
Bobby nearly dragged Sam after him as they rushed into the hospital, the sliding doors startling the young man for a moment but the veteran hunter did not pause until he reached the nurse's station.
"We're here to see Dean Winchester," Bobby told the young woman sitting behind the desk. She peered up at the two men and smiled, "Are you family?"
Bobby fought the urge to roll his eyes, "I'm his uncle and this here's his brother."
"Alright," the nurse said and turned to look at the computer screen as she typed.
Sam was staring wide-eyed at the bustling foyer. Doctors and orderlies were running around, family members were hugging and crying tears of either happiness or sadness, the PA system babbled overhead.
The young man's hand tightened in Bobby's sleeve, fingers curling into a fist and a frown forming on his face.
Finally the nurse behind the desk looked up, "Dean Winchester is in room three-oh-four."
"Thanks," Bobby muttered and turned around, almost toppling over when Sam didn't follow him and remained as still as a statue.
"Son!" the old hunter exclaimed, "C'mon!"
Sam's eyes were watery and he was frowning.
"Sammy?" Bobby asked, using the young man's nickname once again.
The hunter reached out and placed his hand over Sam's.
"We're gonna go up and see Dean now," Bobby explained, "Okay?"
The hunter took a couple of steps back and was relieved when the younger man followed.
Bobby quickly found the elevators and the one they stepped into was empty. The older man squeezed Sam's shoulder comfortingly, looking at their reflections in the shiny surface of the lift's door.
Taking a deep breath, Bobby led Sam out to the third-floor hallway. Glancing around, Bobby was relieved to see that at least they were not on the ICU floor. He peered nervously at each door they passed, praying that Dean would be alright when they saw him.
"Here it is," Bobby paused in front of a whitewashed door with a small metal plaque with the numbers 304 on it. He didn't even lift his gaze to look through the small square window, afraid of what he might see.
Slowly, Bobby pushed the door open, calling himself a wuss for acting as he was, and peered inside.
Dean was sitting up in bed, clad in a blue hospital gown with a sheepish expression on his face. Bobby frowned, besides the white piece of gauze taped to the young man's temple, Dean looked no worse for wear.
"Hey Bobby," he greeted and tried to smile.
Glowering in disapproval, the older hunter stomped into the room, dragging Sam along with him.
"You idjit!" Bobby growled, pulling Sam's hand off his sleeve and towering over the prostrate older brother.
"Bobby-" Dean tried but Bobby interrupted him, "Don't even start with me! You just listen!"
The eldest Winchester shrank back against the starched hospital pillows, his expression taken aback.
"What the hell were you thinking?! Why would you leave Sam alone?" Bobby snapped angrily.
"He was with you-" Dean spoke up but a glare from Bobby cut his argument short.
"You know better than anyone what Sam's like now! You should know he can't function without you!" Bobby growled, leaning in close to Dean, "At least you could have tried to ease him into you leaving! For a few hours at a time or something!"
"Bobby, I thought-" Dean attempted to speak again.
"No! You didn't think! You claim to be worried about Sam an' then you take off to God knows where without so much as a 'goodbye'!"
Dean's gaze dropped, his expression ashamed.
"He knows you, Bobby," he whispered, "I thought he'd be alright with you."
The veteran hunter rolled his eyes but decided not to say anything else; now was not the time or place to argue with Dean.
"We'll continue this back at the Salvage Yard, Dean Winchester," Bobby hissed menacingly.
Although he was pissed at the young man for being irresponsible, the grizzled hunter knew he wouldn't get into it again with the eldest Winchester. He knew Dean felt bad enough without him having to rub it in.
"You brought Sammy here?" Dean asked, pushing himself up against the pillows.
"Ayuh," Bobby said, "Couldn't leave him home alone."
Dean smirked, "I'm sure he'd be able to give Macaulay Culkin a run for his money."
The eldest Winchester shifted position and for the first time since Bobby had entered the room, took his eyes off the older man, spying his brother standing in the doorway.
"Hey Sammy," he called, "C'mon over here."
Shuffling slowly, the younger brother moved forward until he stood right beside Dean's bed. The older brother reached out and took hold of his sibling's wrist.
"How you doing, Sammy?" Dean asked, raising his brother's hand as he did so until it rested on his chest so Sam would be able to feel his heartbeat.
Sam, as usual, remained silent. He inched closer to the hospital bed, head down.
Dean glanced over at Bobby, "Doc gave me a clean bill of health; said I should be fine to go home in a few hours."
The grizzled hunter nodded.
"What exactly happened, Dean?" he asked, "I know you drive that old Impala like a bat out of Hell but it's not like you to get into accidents."
The younger man shrugged, "I was coming back- after you called- and I guess I wasn't paying as much attention as I should have. All I could think of was Sammy and I only took my eyes off the road for a moment… I was going to text you and ended up in the ditch instead."
Bobby looked like he wanted to wring Dean's neck for being so irresponsible but he only shook his head, "Thank God that's all that happened."
Turning his attention back to Sam, Dean titled his head so that he could try and get a look at his brother's face.
"I tried to get him to eat but he wasn't having any of it," Bobby spoke up, "He knew you weren't there straight away."
Dean frowned. He hadn't planned for it to turn out like this. Sam knew Bobby, liked him and was comfortable around him. Dean had thought Sam would be alright without him for a day or two.
I guess I was wrong, Dean thought sadly and sighed, rubbing his thumb along Sam's knuckles.
"What did you do about the case?" Bobby's voice cut in and Dean held back the urge to scowl at him.
"I called up one of Dad's old contacts to take care of it," the younger man explained absentmindedly.
Further questions were prevented when the door opened and a middle-aged woman with ash-blonde hair and faded blue eyes entered the room.
"Hello," she greeted them, "I'm Doctor Banner."
"Bobby Singer," the grizzled hunter stepped forward to shake the woman's hand, "An' this is Sam; Dean's brother."
Dean instinctively tightened his grip on Sam's wrist when his doctor turned to his sibling. Dr. Banner, however, only smiled and moved to Dean's other side, checking his charts and the heart-rate monitor they insisted he be hooked up to.
"Well my earlier diagnosis still stands," she announced happily after setting the clipboard on the end of the bed again, "You'll be a free man in a few hours. We just need to keep you a little longer for observation- hospital policy- but other than that I don't see any reason why you can't go home this evening."
"Thanks Doc," Dean said and watched the woman carefully as she looked at Sam again, almost as though she was analyzing him with her gaze.
From the corner of his eye, Dean caught Bobby following the doctor's line of vision as well, a frown on his face.
"I'll check in later on," Dr. Banner said and left the room, Dean's eyes nearly burning twin holes into the back of her lab coat as she went.
Leaning back against the pillows, Dean gritted his teeth, "Jesus! I thought she was gonna leap across the freakin' bed and grab Sam."
"She was probably just curious," Bobby commented, not sounding like he believed himself.
"Maybe I should have left him with Rufus," the grizzled hunter muttered.
Dean shook his head; sure, he liked Rufus- the man was a good hunter- but a babysitter, Dean was sure he was not. Besides, Sam might not remember the other hunter and if Bobby left him with Rufus, it may end badly.
"If anyone tries to take him away from me," Dean promised, "I'll kick their ass, doctors or not."
"I think I'm gonna head down to the cafeteria and get myself some coffee," Bobby changed the subject, "You want anything?"
"I could use a cold one," Dean smirked and Bobby rolled his eyes, leaving the room without further comment.
The older brother returned his attention to his brother. He shifted to the far side of the bed and patted the empty space beside him.
"Have a seat," Dean said and Sam sat heavily on the edge of the mattress, the position looking rather uncomfortable but he wouldn't complain.
"Sammy," Dean grabbed his brother wrist again- he'd had to let go as he moved over- and squeezed gently.
"I'm sorry, Sam," Dean apologized, his voice a whisper, even though he knew his brother probably didn't fully understand what he was saying.
"I was being a dick and you deserve better than that," he continued, "I just… I could never leave the hunting life, you know? I tried when you were gone… when I was with Lisa but… I'm not cut out for the 'apple pie life'… not like you."
Dean paused and glanced up at his brother. Sam's eyes were half closed, his expression unreadable.
"It's my fault you're like this… I didn't stop you… no matter what Bobby or anyone else says. I said you could do whatever you felt was right. I… I watched you jump and didn't do anything."
"What I'm trying to say is… you should be the most important thing to me… you are, actually, and I forgot that. There are other hunters out there. But there's only one me. Sure, we've got Bobby but, just between the two of us, he'll never be as awesome as I am."
Dean sighed and glanced out the window for a moment at the golden, early evening sunlight streaming through the glass.
"You probably have no clue what I'm saying, do you?"
Sam didn't answer.
"That's okay," Dean continued, "I know you can't stay mad a me. You never could."
The eldest Winchester looked up when the door opened again- expecting to see Bobby- but smiled anyway when a petite nurse walked in, a tray in her hands.
"Thanks Natasha," Dean said, causing the nurse to blush.
"Is this your brother?" she asked, looking at Sam after she set the tray down on the table beside the bed.
Dean nodded, "His name's Sam."
Natasha smiled sympathetically at the young man before speaking to Dean.
"Enjoy your dinner."
After the nurse was out of the room, Dean reached out and lifted his brother's chin, peering into Sam's face.
"What is it with people?"
Releasing his brother's chin, Dean stared at his hospital food- a tuna sandwich, a bowl of chicken noodle soup, and a cup of green Jell-O for dessert- and grimaced.
"Here, Sammy," Dean said and put the Jell-O cup and plastic spoon in his brother's hand, "Eat that and I'll let you have the sandwich."
The older Winchester waited until Sam had started eating before he began on his soup. It was lukewarm and bland but he didn't complain, it was his own damn fault for not paying attention to the road in the first place.
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Bobby returned just as Dean finished his soup, setting the bowl aside and stretching, gingerly touching the gauze at his temple.
"Man am I ready to blow this joint," Dean muttered and switched the empty Jell-O cup for the tuna sandwich; his own stomach still growling hungrily.
Bobby sat down, coffee cup in hand and watched the brothers for a moment with a wry smile.
"What took you so long?" Dean asked, shoving his dinner tray aside and leaning forward, forearms resting on his knees.
Bobby's smiled faltered somewhat, "Was talking to Doctor Banner. She asked about Sam."
Dean's expression immediately darkened, "What did she say? What did you say?"
Sam, seeming to sense the change in his brother's mood, stopped eating his sandwich and turned his 'puppy-eyes' on his sibling.
Dean reached out and ruffled his sibling's hair affectionately, "Don't worry about it, Sam. I'm not letting anything happen to you."
Apparently placated, Sam resumed eating his sandwich and Dean turned a pointed expression on Bobby. The grizzled hunter sighed and sat his coffee cup aside.
"She asked what was wrong with him," Bobby explained and Dean's expression turned even more grim.
"What did you tell her?"
Bobby took off his baseball cap and scratched his thinning hair, "I said he had been in an accident an' that you were taking care of him, that you were his legal guardian 'cause both yer folks were gone. I didn't go into any great detail, just tried to keep her from asking too many questions."
"What business is it of hers what happened to Sam," Dean growled, "It isn't like he's being treated badly. I can take care of him."
Bobby shrugged, his mouth moving but not speaking.
"What?" Dean asked suspiciously.
"Nuthin'… It's just… not too long ago, people like Sam probably would have been institutionalized," Bobby spoke his thoughts, "I'm sure more than a few of them still are."
The eldest Winchester's eyes narrowed.
"I think yer doctor was more shocked than anything that you were taking the responsibility of lookin' after Sam, is all," Bobby finished.
Dean nodded.
Why wouldn't I look after Sammy? He's my brother.
Dean couldn't imagine leaving his sibling- his last remaining family member, besides Bobby- in some sketchy state-run home. Sam didn't deserve that. After all he'd done, after everything he'd sacrificed, that would have been a slap in the face.
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Dean closed his eyes gratefully as he sat in between Sam and Bobby. The pickup truck wasn't really made to hold three full-grown men but the Impala was too damaged to drive back to Sioux Falls and really he knew he shouldn't be complaining.
The sky was a dark purple, the stars just beginning to shine, as they headed home. Bobby didn't speak much and Dean didn't feel like talking to the older man, afraid he'd get reamed again so he spent the time thinking about Sam.
Dean knew that he wouldn't go out hunting again, no matter how much he wanted to; that wasn't him anymore. His job was to take care of Sam.
The eldest Winchester couldn't help but feel guilty though, there were people out there who need him and he was resigning himself to being his brother's keeper instead.
It wouldn't have to be like this if you'd told Sam jumping into Lucifer's Cage was a stupid idea, Dean told himself. He sighed and rubbed at his eyes with his fingers.
"You tired, boy?" Bobby asked without taking his gaze from the road.
"Yeah," Dean muttered and looked away from the older man, towards his brother.
Sam was looking out the passenger window, one hand against the glass.
SPN
"Say my name," Dean said to his brother the next morning as Bobby watched, leaning against the counter, "I know you can do it."
The grizzled hunter shook his head and took a large drink of coffee, his heart breaking for the younger man. The Winchesters were sitting at the kitchen table, breakfast dishes in the sink, and Dean had his hands on either side of his brother's face, ensuring Sam was looking at him.
"D-e-a-n," the older brother stressed, "Dean. C'mon Sammy, its easy. It was your first word, you've got to remember."
Sam didn't speak. His lips were turned up slightly as though he thought Dean's attempts at making him talk were humorous.
Bobby couldn't take it anymore, "The boy's not gonna talk if he don't wanna."
Or can't, the older man corrected as Dean's hazel eyes bore into his grey ones.
"He can't stay like this forever, Bobby!" Dean insisted, "He has to start getting better now that he's Topside again!"
The grizzled hunter sighed, "Dean, from what you told me Cas said, Sam's not going to get better. Lucifer and Michael did Sam some irreparable damage."
The younger man looked like he wanted to snap at Bobby, but he didn't. Instead, Dean turned to look at Sam. The older sibling reached up and brushed the younger man's long bangs back from his brow.
Dean sighed and sat back, picking up his own mug of coffee and drinking deeply.
"Are you alright, son?" Bobby asked concernedly.
Dean shrugged, "No, not really. But I'll live, I guess."
The veteran hunter pushed himself away from the counter and stared at the young man, "This ain't the end of the world. This ain't the hardest challenge you boys have had to face."
Dean gave Bobby an incredulous look.
"You'll get through this, just as you always do," Bobby continued, "Just take things slow. Don't rush."
Dean nodded and his expression turned sheepish, "I know I don't deserve anything from you after what I did the other day… but… can you help me? With Sam?"
Bobby smiled, "I thought you'd never ask."
Author's Note:
1. Thanks to maxandkiz, reannablue, mandancie, angeleyenc, anon, jkf340, BranchSuper, Abbygail, baileylovesyou0400, NAVILLUS, jojospn, mcrygirl, SPN Mum, L.A.H.H, emebalia, mb64, SUPERNATURALANGEL67, Sivadkristal1447, sarah, Rie, and Souless666 for reviewing.
2. Thanks to everyone who alerted or favourited.
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