Summary:

Warning! This is unbeta'd! It probably really sucks but I felt that you guys deserved something since you've all been waiting for so long!

Levi confronts Eren on his self-harming problem.

Erent attends his first day at Sina High.

Eren's P.O.V.

Notes:

Hey there, readers!
I'm so sorry that it took me almost a full year to update this fanfiction. When I first started this fic it helped me to release my emotions without having to directly vent to anyone (something that I greatly dislike to do simply because I don't want to add any weight onto someone's shoulders). After some time, I hit a huge depressed rut and found life to be nothing but painful. I ended up having a few bad relapses of my own. My family found out soon after and immediately sent me to a therapist. Being so bad at venting my bottled emotions, it took quite some time for my defensive wall to fade. So, with that out in the open now, if you have any questions, comments, or requests, feel free to leave a comment below! Also, please, if you're still reading this fanfiction, let me know in the comments below! That, within itself, will give me the confidence that I need to continue this story!

Important: I would like all of you to also understand that this chapter is unbeta'd! My beta-readers have quit and I personally haven't taken the time to read over my piece! Sorry about this!

Thank you all so much!


Chapter 4:

Don't Get Your Hopes Up

"You…" I spat with clear disgust. My brows furrowed and my teeth, tightly clenched.

"Wait! Before you go off on me, I want to say just a few things!" My fingers clasped around the hem of my sweatshirt as he begged me to listen to his vile words.

"I don't care!" I turned on my heel and fled to the door in anger.

Only after releasing a heavy sigh, he spoke; "Eren, if you don't accept my help then I will have to contact Carla and make sure you get the attention you fucking need!" His words caused me to pause, my full body's weight planted on my leading foot.

'How can this man continue to belittle me? My mother doesn't deserve any more pain but no, this asshat, a mere stranger, would place that extra burden on my mother's frail shoulders without a second thought.' "You...y-you wouldn't!" I could feel my uncontrollable rage spike as our eyes met.

"Eren, I don't want to hurt you or your family in any way however I can't just leave you like this," he spoke with a fake calmness that I knew was hiding irritation. "You need help and if you won't accept it from me then I must inform someone close to you before you seriously get hurt. I won't just fucking stand by while you kill yourself!"

"How would you know that I need help? You sure as hell aren't 'worthless Eren fucking Jäger' and clearly you don't know the pain that I'm going through so you can shut the hell up and stop trying to be the fucking hero here!" I yelled back at him with full force, my head down, my fists tightly clenched in a death grip, and my whole body shaking beneath the heavy layers adorning my generally weak, thin frame.

"Eren," he sighed again as he approached, a pallid hand nearing my trembling shoulder. Enraged, I brusquely swatted the hand away, causing him to take a step away from me; the feral child. "I'm not trying to be the fucking hero here...I just want to help," he spoke as I turned on my heel. "Hey!" He tried to stop me from walking out. "I may not be you however I have had problems of my own and I know how it feels to be alone." My eyes caught the shift in his stance. "Damn it all! I...I used to be like you," he spoke with his steel gray eyes averted.

"So, you think you are 'like' me?" I turned to face him yet again, laughing at his words. "No one is like me!" I hollered. "Everyone has someone that cares for them and loves them accept for me! I always lose the friends I have and hurt those that get too close! How else am I supposed to atone for all the pain that I have dealt upon people? How else am I supposed to vent this monstrous rage? Tell me, how am I supposed to live with the fact that I am fucking worthless! My blade is my only friend that takes away my agony, my regret, my guilt...and if you want to take that away from me too then you can go shove all your fake sympathy up your ass because I don't want it!"

''Eren...''

''I've literally lost all of my friends and my family! They all up and left and it wasn't even my fault! I-it couldn't have been my fault!" I was screaming and crying like an overtired child throwing a tantrum.

''Eren."

"God, and if losing everyone isn't punishment enough, there's Grisha and every fucking asshole at school! No one cares about me! They all hate me!" I wiped the tears away quickly, not wanting to be seen as someone weak and vulnerable like I clearly was. "See, this is why I should just end this shit!"

"Eren!" He yelled at the top of his lungs, startling me greatly. "You may think you deserve this pain because others around you have suffered but that isn't even remotely true! I would know that because I used to think the same way!" He shoved up his long, black sleeves and brought the pale flesh to me, as if he were displaying something to me. I viewed the neat array of white marks on the skin of his wrists. I wanted to laugh at the few scars that were left behind from past mistakes however I couldn't bring myself to do so because I knew just how much pain someone had to go through to permanently mar their flesh.

"Wh-what do you think you're going to accomplish by showing me...th-these?" I inquire, my body beginning to tremble again for what felt like no apparent reason. I however knew that deep within, I felt sympathy for this man.

"I showed you my scars to hopefully get you to understand that I've gone through shit and that I really want to fucking help someone. That someone, in this case, is you. I want to help you from suffering like I once did." The emphasis he put on his words were startling however it shows his true determination to rescue someone from their own personal demons.

I stayed silent for a moment, thinking of his words. Without realizing it, I began to scoff unkindly. "You think you can help me? I'm so far gone that no one, not even the most divine God, could save me!" I glared, staring directly into his silver eyes. "Helping me would be nothing but a waste of your time." I spoke bluntly and with a crazed glint in my emerald eyes. "There are just simply too many things that are out of your control. One example being that I don't want your help; cutting brings relief and gives me control over at least one aspect of my life." Levi's eyes were wide at my outburst of anger; my social anxiety being overlooked by utter rage. He just simply stared at me as I huffed and puffed due to my exasperated rant.

After a long moment of silence, I turned on my heel and headed for the front door. To little surprise, he called out for me; "Eren!" I turned around and found him before me with open arms. Before I could do anything, I was wrapped in his warm embrace.

"L-Levi, what are you-"

"Eren," he interrupted my words, "I know that it seems like no one can help you but you have to let someone try." His words were desperate and he held me tightly despite my attempts at pushing him away. "You need to realize that, yeah, I may not know you well, but there are people such as Carla and myself, that want you to be happy and healthy. You need to understand that you don't deserve this pain: no matter how much you feel that you fucking do! You need to see that you need someone to be by your side; to be your shoulder to cry on, your confident, your friend,…your savior." As Levi spoke, I tried to butt in but was shut out by his strong, velvety smooth voice. When I finally stopped fighting him, he brought a hand to the back of my head and let me rest my forehead on his shoulder. "I'm here to listen to your problems no matter how big or small. I can offer a safe haven; somewhere you can run and escape the pains of life: even if it's only a few houses away. I will be here for you through thick and thin, happiness and sadness, day and night; all day, every day. I'm here to help you even if no one else will." His words brought out shaky breaths and teary eyes. I felt weak and childish showing this man that I was so broken but he… His words… How can a stranger show me, a worthless waste of space, such love and care? How could such a gruff looking midget be so kind to me? How could he even bear to have me here, in his arms, with my head resting on a surprisingly broad shoulder? Why did my hands clutching the back of his shirt and his arms embracing me endearingly feel so… So good… So natural? So...right? How was any of this making sense?

Levi sat me down and we continued to talk for a bit, going over a few things such as being able to come here anytime, to stay here whenever I needed, and a few baseline rules. He did have a few different terms though, one being that I couldn't come here just to be a little shit ( well, there go my plans). After time passed and we got to know each other better, he decided to cook something for us to eat. "You okay with pizza, brat?" His voice was smooth as silk gets scratchy with an angered tone. If he relaxed and let loose, I feel that his voice would be one of the most peaceful and calming sounds in this cruel world.

Without directly speaking, I just nodded my head, Levi accepting minute responses. The man left me on the black leather sofa and complete and utter silence. Having sat around the park all night, I found my eyelids heavy. Without any fight left in me, my body changed into a relaxed state, my eyes willing themselves shut. Soon enough, my breathing had evened out in my world had become a drifting darkness.

"…-ren?" A voice far off in the distance. "Eren?"

' It's calling for me… Why would anyone speak my blasphemous name?'

"Eren?"

' Why? Why are you calling for me?'

"Eren,It's time for you to wake up."

' But… What if I don't want to wake up? What if I like it better here: aimlessly floating through an imaginative space created for myself, by myself?'

"Eren…" A cool hand upon my cheek startled me awake. "The pizzas ready, brat." Levi's eyes grew wide as I slapped his hand away without a second thought. My repulsion caused him to take a worried step back."I apologize if I scared you but it was your damn fault for falling asleep when the food was going to be done in only a few minutes. That and you would wake the fuck up so I had to do something," he spoke naturally, his eyes staring directly into mine. I quickly averted my till gems from his silver shards with a soft apology. "Well, just get off your ass whenever you're ready," he sighed, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. He then headed into the spotless kitchen; I followed just behind.

"Thanks," I mumbled just beneath my breath. He immediately looked to me with the peculiar facial expression that I could clearly see was a soft smile. It surprised me a bit to see him look 'happy' however I couldn't keep myself from once again averting my eyes.

"Help yourself, brat."

"Th-thanks," I replied again, taking the black and white bamboo designed plate from him. I quickly chose a piece before moving to the large dining room; sparsely filled with a modern, square table and a few elegant chairs. There were beautiful dark sconces placed upon the wall. When you look just passed the table, you find another doorway. I curiously peered around the open black threshold to find a dimly-lit, expensive 'adult' lounge. The walls were painted a dark mahogany with a very luscious, dark wood bar.

"Like it?" His voice startled me and I jumped, almost dropping my plate on the floor.

"Y-yeah," I squeaked, turning back towards the room, eyeing all of the lit-up alcohol on display behind the bar. "I don't like the purpose of the room though," I spoke beneath my breath. Levi must have caught that I was speaking, questioning what I had previously mumbled. I just simply replied with a 'nevermind' and he thankfully left it at that.

We both ate in general silence, only speaking when Levi asked a question and I felt like answering. Once we were both finished, we remained at the table, Levi bringing up a topic that always made me shiver in disgust.

"How has the school change been, brat?" It may be a Sunday today but anyone was smart enough to know that I was a student who should have been attending Sina for the last few days.

"I...I haven't started yet," I spoke truthfully however his usual expression didn't change.

"You realize that it's already fucking October, right?" I was surprised by his brusque usage of the English language. Despite my displeasure with his dirty, vile mouth, I listened to his true question however found that I didn't get what he truly meant by the statement. I mean...Of course I knew what month it was, why wouldn't I? "You've already missed a good month of school just because of moving, haven't you?" My raised eyebrow fell back to it's normal position as I let out a small 'oh'.

"I attended school before we decided to move here but my mother decided to let me get settled into the new house before throwing the stress of school on top of the move."

"I guess that makes more sense than waiting to enroll until after the move," he spoke, looking directly at me. His gaze made me feel slightly uncomfortable however he must have sensed my uneasiness, now looking about.

"Y-yeah, well...I loved the break," I admitted. "School has never been a very enjoyable place to be; kids have always discluded me. As the years have gone by though, things have gotten worse; much worse. Elementary school was mainly just verbal teasing and exclusion. Middle school and high school however were filled with nothing but physical, mental, and verbal abuse. Nowadays the kid's don't just ignore you. They are constantly there, plaguing every aspect of your life with negativity be it when you're at school, at home; anywhere and everywhere. Phones and internet happen to be another hindrance; just another way for tormentors to ruin your life." My true feelings began to leak out; my eyes staring into my lap and my fists clenching the loose fabric of my jeans. "They no longer just ruin your day, no, they have to make you miserable for the rest of your poor existence. I mean, if their snide looks and 'behind-your-back' comments aren't torture enough then the threats and beatings are."

"Ere-"

"The words of ridicule start to stick and then you end up like me; a person who can only believe the labels that others have given them. 'You're ugly', 'are you emo', 'do you cut', 'you're disgusting', 'worthless', 'weak', 'why don't you just kill yourself'. They say such vile things but those malicious tags remain with you; like a brand, permanently etched upon your skin; visible every time you look at yourself. Then, when any term has been used repetitively, it begins to appear everywhere and, like a chisel, it breaks away at a part of you. It's always the worst at night, too. It echoes infinitely in your mind, even as you try to empty your thoughts and rest. But of course, the faces of your mental blight appear and before you know it, you're being haunted by your own inner demons. Then, you break down and use the one and only friend you have to calm the raging storm of self-hate and horrid memories of discrimination. Then, you don't just suffer once: it's an endless cycle of pain. And now, tomorrow, I will be starting up at Sina high -a place where I will never fit in-. A-and then everything is just going to get worse again and then...I..." weak tears began to fall another time. I quickly wiped the second wave away, sniffling madly. Levi let out a sympathetic exhale, getting up and moving towards me. He pulled my head against his chest -despite my flinch- and caressed my hair. It was a very nostalgic feeling: my mother always holding me close and running a hand over my messy locks. The two of us sat like that for quite some time, Levi whispering encouraging words.

"I know how much school fucking sucks; trust me. I've been there and suffered through it and I know it's not easy! I personally had more fucking downfalls than most shits would guess. I know that school is a living hell but I also know that you're almost fucking done! Eren, I hope you can see just how close you are to having a diploma in your hands. Try to stay strong for me. Graduate and tell me how it feels to hold that certificate in your hand. I truly want to understand how you felt completing high school because...I never got to know that feeling." My eyes went wide, tears cascading down my cheek. He told me something so personal and the emotions flooded me. I found it so difficult to believe that he, the man standing before me, had been a drop out.

"Y-you…" he held a very penitent look as I almost dared to question why.

"My past is something that I am gravely ashamed of and I hope to stop you from someday feeling the same," he gave me an earnest look as he spoke. "Please try to make it at school; it's very important."

"I-i'll try but…" I mumbled, "I can't make any promises."

"I understand however if you ever need me, just call me. I don't care if I'm at work, sleeping, or taking a shit; just call me and ask for help if you need it." He patted my shoulder amiably.

"I-i don't have a cell phone…" I murmured, his piercing, silver eyes widening immediately.

"Are you shitting me?" His already grumpy look increased as his brows furrowed.

"No, my last one was broken by some kids from school and...my father won't replace it." I had previously begged and pleaded for a new phone; even a flip would have sufficed! My mother agreed to take me however my father wasn't very keen on the idea of 'wasting' money on his 'worthless', 'waste-of-space' son. After quite the battle, I just decided to live without any connection to the outside world.

"Seriously? Most fucking eight-year olds have a phone in today's society and you're telling me that you don't have even a god damn, prehistoric flip?"

"I use to have one!" I added once again, putting emphasis on the fact that I don't have one anymore.

"YEah, yeah, yeah but that doesn't solve this shitty ass mess…" he sighed, his eyes roaming about while he tried to think of something. " Still take my number, I'll write it out for you. If you ever need me to pick you up from school or something, you'll have it. For now, this will do but I'll have to think of something but...until then, I need you to stay strong. Oh, before I forget, feel free free to stop by whenever you need to; I'm not always home but when I am, I can help." He went to get a small paper, writing his cellphone digits with amazing elegance. "Here's my cell and work numbers." I gave a nod, pocketing the item that I may actually keep; just maybe…

"Alright then, lets get you home."

Levi and I walked down the street in silence, my mind going over our previous conversation. I stared at his long black sleeves as he walked in front of me. 'He...he seems stable; a large house, an antique car...how could he have ever been like me?'

"Brat?" My eyes moved to his face. "You're home." I looked over, the pastel yellow house sitting beautifully before me. He moved before me, walking up the steps. I hesitated a moment, checking the driveway for my father's car. Seeing the vehicle, I backed away from the door, Levi giving me a confused brow raise.

"You knock…" I shied away, stepping behind him on the white porch.

"Okay then," he stepped up, landing a few hard knocks on the white door.

The door opened quickly. "Eren?" Carla looked out, spotting me instantly. "Oh Eren, thank god you came back! We were really starting to get worried!" She ran forward, wrapping her frail, maidenly arms around me. I slowly and weakly returned the embrace, knowing full well that only she had missed me.

She released me from the hug, finding Levi on her porch beside me. "L...Levi, correct?" The raven nodded in response. "It's a pleasure to see you again." She gave a respectful bow of her head. "M-may I help you with something today?"

"No," he declined kindly, "Just bringing the child back home."

"Eren! Were you bothering the neighbors?" She gave me a stern look.

"No, don't worry Carla. I stepped in on my own accord." He spoke with a respectful manner that wasn't very familiar to me seeing as he would usually fit a few swear words into every other sentence.

"You are such aking gentleman, Levi. Thank you." Mother gave one of her signature smiles before turning back towards me. "Eren, we should head inside; we have a lot to talk about before you're off to Sina High tomorrow." I just replied with a silent nod. "Good," she turned back to the raven, "we're going to head inside for now but I hope you have a wonderful day, Mr. Levi."

"You too." He nodded his head before looking back at me. "Eren, remember what I said." I once again nodded quietly before my mother dragged me inside.

My mother and I sat at the elegant dining room table collaborating about my first day back in the school system. Not once did I bring up how I felt about going to school or how I was afraid of being thrown into the cesspool of brainiacs and athletes with my unfitting skills. She had previously known that I wasn't popular and that I would sometimes come home with a few cuts and bruises however she never truly questioned it; most likely thinking that I was young and stupid and got into a fight. Despite the fact that her thoughts were wrong, I never brought it up; my mother already having to deal with enough shit without having to add the fact that her son was being beaten up.

Her motherly nature caught my unease. "I promise everything will go fine tomorrow, okay?" She gave a reassuring smile however it did little to calm my thoughts.

"Thanks," I returned a weak grin. As I did so, shame built up within my chest. 'How, even when looking deep within my loving mother's eyes, can I not pull off a real smile? Since when have I been this far gone?'

"Before I begin dinner, can we have a chat about your disappearance yesterday?" Without even letting me answer, she began. We went through a bit before she decided to go cook supper.

Soon enough and I was alone in my room, staring up at the beige ceiling. Mother was fast asleep in her room and Grisha was passed out on the recliner; the silence killing me on the inside. I lay upon my bed, sighing heavily as my mind wandered down dark paths.

"Eren!" The alarm beeps off incessantly. "Darling, it's time to wake up!" Mother's voice pounds loudly in my head. "Eren!" My tired eyes open wide at the audacious beep and matching calls. I gave my clock an annoyed smack, the alarm cutting off sharply.

"E-eren?"

"Yeah mom, I'm up," I yawned, stretching a bit before getting up and throwing my sweatshirt on. Once my cuts and scars were covered, I unlocked my door.

"Eren, you know I don't like you locking your door. What if something were to happen?"

"Mom, something almost always happens and locking my doors has always stopped 'him' from getting to me," I added, taking the school's uniform out of her hands and heading for the shower.

I stripped my clothes once I was in the Earth-toned bathroom, gripping the sink tightly while staring into my reflection. My hair has grown long, messily covering my face and shielding a great portion of my eyes. Looking over my eyes, I noted the bags forming beneath them, reminding myself of the way that Levi's eyes were sunken in a similar, sleep-deprived way. Truly unhappy with that I was viewing, I moved toward the shower; throwing the water on at a burning temperature that I knew would scorch my naturally tan flesh.

I sat in the scalding warmth until my mother yelled at me for lack of time. Her calls brought me to shampoo my hair and end my peaceful escape. I got out, dried off, and ruffled a towel over my head. I tried to tame my unruly hair but left it after it decided to truly defy gravity. Once dressed, I headed out, feeling quite uncomfortable.

"Oh sweetie, you look so handsome!" My mother came up to me, laying a kiss upon my cheek.

"I-i...don't really like it," I murmured.

"It's not your usual style however I think it's a good change," She smiled. "Go grab your backpack and a jacket so we can get going before you're late!" I nodded, heading into my room, taking off the dark blue suit jacket. I grabbed my simple green sweatshirt, wearing it over the formal apparel. Once fully clothed and now more comfortable, we left the house.

"Do you have everything you need?" She spoke as she pulled up to a red light.

"Yeah, I think so."

"Got your schedule, your old ID card, some gym clothes, and all the materials?"

"I told you, I'm signing up for online gym!" I squawked, messily looking for my schedule.

"Erin, the school requires 4 years of in-school gym! There was nothing I could do to get you out of it!" She rose her voice, surprisingly. "Some exercise will do you good anyways."

I was highly displeased with her words. I would never change in front of so many people and push myself to stay fit when being haggled by so many jocks. Now, before even getting to school, I knew shit was going to hit the fan.

"Wonderful day, dear." She gave me a loving peck on the cheek before sending me off. I stepped out of the old vehicle, staring at the vast land and insanely beautiful Gothic-styled school. My mother pulled away, leaving me for the intimidating building. For a minute, I stood instantly watch the people into the historic building. The beauty of it all was overwhelming and I immediately knew that I wasn't going to fit in.

"Move it," and I bumped into me as I stood in awe. Being the person I was, I turned towards him, opening her mouth, ready to unleash some creative language that would surely get me into trouble. Seeing red jersey and a bag full of what must be his football gear, I backed down. He simply scoffed at me, "That's right," as I gave him his space.

"Excuse us," a sweet voice, ears and I looked past the two-tone undercut, Fighting a smile and a cute, freckled face. After that the left, going towards the building. I gave a heavy sigh, the feeling of unease only getting worse now. With my hands gripping my backpack straps tightly, I walked in after the other two.

Inside, I held in the want to slacken my jaw and all. The hallways were wide, when he was tall the lockers and trophy displays. I was astounded to see so many people despite the school's vast size. If my social anxiety wasn't bad enough in a public school full of average day teens, that it was through the roof now with the large sum of rich beauties, tough jocks, smart nerds, and everyone else in between.

Walking down the hall, I began to collapse in on myself. I looked down, shoulders pulled in tight naturally, my mind shutting down. My heart began to speed up, my breath hitching out of anxiety as I felt people watching me: the rise like stabbing knives. An unsettling not formed within my stomach, my head filling with sharp pain. I was absolutely uncomfortable, like a sore thumb those catching everyone's attention. The sounds of girls giggling, here, a culture running through my body. Just their simple laughter triggered even more anxiety deep within my echoing thoughts.

'Were they laughing at me? Do I look weird? Is my hair? My jacket? Or is it… Just me? Do you see that I'm ugly? The fact is worthless? Do you see who I really am?' As my thoughts continue to flare, I dipped into the nearby men's room, rounding the corner before placing my backpack against the wall and sliding down onto my rear. I pulled my knees to my chest, my breath heaving as I tried to relax my racing thoughts and worries.

"H-hey, are you okay?" I jumped at hand had been gently placed upon my messy locks. I stared: sky blue and teal now locked. After a decent gone just a little too long to be comfortable, we both looked away. "S-so," the blonde weekly stuttered, "a-are you alright?" I said we shook my head in reply, my breathing still heavier than normal.

"Is there anything I can do to um…Help?" The blonde questioned, tucking some of his medium-length hair behind his ear.

"C-can you take me to the office?" I mumbled quietly. He raised an eyebrow. "Office?" I repeated a little louder.

"Oh! Are you new here?" His smile was overwhelming but cute. I nodded to answer him. "Alright, I can take you to the office then." Houston the hand held me up. I started offered appendage for a moment before hesitantly taking it. He held me up and give my hand a shake, "by the way!"

"Eren," I added quietly, letting him leave me out the door.

"So, the greater you and Eren?" He questioned as we walked on the still crowded hallways.

"I'm a j-junior," but words began to show my true feelings. Being in this pack school made my stomach churn and my whole body tremble with dreaded anxiety.

"Oh, you're an 11th grade student just like me!" He gave a cheerful giggle while pushing his glasses up. "Well, I hope we at least a few classes together! And quote

"Y-yeah." He seemed like a kind guy: a little too chipper for me but I'm sure I could use the extra nerdy happiness in my life.

"Well, here we are! I'll take you in and you situated before I go."

"Th-thanks but… Will you be late?" Armin seemed smart and I figured he wouldn't want to miss whichever class he had first.

"It's no problem for me. I went to a guide for students and families so it's pretty much my job to help noobs like you out!"

"O-okay then," I spoke, slightly confused by his usage of the term 'noob'. I wasn't a very social kid so I figured the new word to be some modern-day lingo that I hadn't quite picked up on yet.

With that, we entered the office and he spoke to the front desk lady for me. She checked my old ID card before grabbing my new Sina High badge. The lady then went over my schedule with me, clarifying on the nearby school map where my locker was generally located. Once done with that, she wrote Armin an electronic pass that would be sent to his teachers before Warning us of the oncoming Bell.

As we exited the office, I handed my schedule over to Armin. Armin looked over my classes for a moment, the five-minute warning bell echoing through the school's emptying hallways.

"Sadly, it seems like fate has worked against us. Dang it; I even presumed that you were someone with somewhat similar intellectual abilities."

"What made you think that?"

"Well, most students that attend Sina come for the athletics program or for the vast number of offered academic courses. Finding you in the bathroom like that, I figured you were one of the brainiacs that felt intimidated by the number of attendees and athletes. It's not surprising to find a new academics student overwhelmed by the crowds or hiding from the gymnasts," he giggled. "I must admit though, our athletes are all generally nice to us geeks. Our school has policies and even mixed free times for us to get to know each other and work together. Truthfully, we have a lot of respect for each other; the athletes stick up for us and we help them if they need any academic assistance. It's a decent civil union; we're always there for one another no matter how strong or smart." I was surprised by the news, hoping that I would find the same peace within the confines of this historic building.

"Alright, your locker is right here," he pointed out the tall, blue storage unit. "I suggest trying to open it at least once and then I'll take you to your first class." I nodded, approaching my locker with a shaky breath. Armin watched carefully as I turned the dial. I tried my hands at the comb a good four times before the blond finally decided to help. With little effort, he cracked it open, closing it and asking me to try yet again. I failed for the fifth time, kicking the locker in frustration and giving up.

"I'm not going to use it anyways so can I just go to class?" I was fed up with trying to open the damn thing and I could tell that my anger was starting to boil deep within my veins.

"Yeah," he spoke, checking his wrist watch. "Follow me," he chimed before beginning to walk. The halls were practically empty by now; the occasional lost person or late student being the only few remaining. "Here we are!" he walked in, my body halting just outside the door. To put it simply, I was super frickin' nervous; my legs shaking at the idea of walking into my Algebra 2 class knowing that everyone's eyes would be on me.

"Eren?" Armin questioned as he looked back at me. I simply shook my head, nails digging into my palms. He gave a sigh before coming back into the hallway. "It'll be fine! Mrs. Duniken is great!" He gave me a grin before patting me hard on the back. The outwardly rough contact made me jump, fearful eyes stuck on the blond. "Go on!" He gave me a head gesture before having to practically drag me into the full classroom.

"Good morning, Armin!" The woman gave us a pleasant smile. the forming wrinkles growing more obvious. "Are you helping out the new student?"

"Yep! Just bringing him to his first class." The two continued talking, my eyes going over the many desks with jersey-sporting teens. Many eyes were meeting mine, a heavy knot tightening in my gut. I heard a scoff; my head dropping, letting my bangs fall further into my face. Groups were whispering, my mind immediately taking it as everyone dissing me with hushed tones. My nails dug further into the palms of my hand; the sharp warmth of pain filling parts of my clenched fist.

"Hello," I jumped away as the hand moved towards me. "It's a pleasure to have you in my class." I looked up, meeting her eyes for a moment before looking away and rushing a weak handshake.

"Okay, my job here is done!" Armin gave a wide grin.

"Did you already receive a pass?" The math teacher questioned. Armin nodded, explaining that an office woman had already sent an electronic pass. "Okay then, you better hurry; you've already missed a few minutes of class!"

"Alright, thanks Mrs. Duniken! Bye everyone!"

"Now then, I need everyone to take their seats and to quiet down." With her words, the room settled in mere seconds. She looked over the class before giving me a seat and starting the lesson.

As she spouted what seemed to be a different language, I took the time to look over the room. To my right was a brunette eating chips. In front of her was a decently small guy with a buzz cut, complaining that the 'potato-chip-girls's' eating habits will affect her track scores. Then to my left happened to be a beautiful, petite blonde, her dance-team jersey looking almost a size too large. In front of the goddess-like cutie was a brunette with freckles; her basketball gear fitting her natural look perfectly. Behind me were three people; a freakishly tall basketball player, a completely buffed out blonde, and a stone-faced gal. Near the front of the room was the football playing horse-guy that had previously bumped into me.

I spent the rest of the hour looking over the other people and trying to match them with a sport. I found almost everyone in the class was wearing something recreationally related. Myself and one other person were left adorning the normal student school uniform.

With that, the bell rang. I exited the room, heading directly to the fourth floor. I quickly got things set with my next teacher and then sat down, my chin resting upon my hand wearily. Within a matter of seconds, I was confronted by a few others, my social anxiety spiking, leaving my insides feeling like a jumbled mess.

"Eren, right?" The beefed up blonde from my previous class spoke, a large hand being placed upon the far corner of my desk. I hesitantly looked over their stone-cold faces. "Welcome to Sina High," he scoffed, clearly pointing fun at me with his overly sarcastic tone of voice. "I'm Reiner, this is Bertholdt, and that's Annie."

"Sport?" Annie assumed I was a health junkie like all the rest in my classes.

"I-i don't play," I murmured, a wave of cold running through my body as they seemed to look down upon me now that they knew the truth.

"I thought you were about our age but you must be younger to be taking this class as an advanced course," Bertholdt commented.

"Or….maybe the dude's a normal!" Reiner added, their faces cringing at the title. I was slightly confused by all of their awkward displays. I felt like a 'normal' person, nothing special about me; no amazing talents or abilities to share with the world.

"So, are you a normal, Eren?" Annie asked, stoic face looking judgemental as her eyes bore into me.

"What's...what's a 'normal'?" I questioned with a raised brow. The three just snickered at me as they walked over to their desks.

My next few hours were quite...lonesome. No one spoke to me, only giving me peculiar looks; my anxiety pushing horrible thoughts into my head with each and every glance I received. Lunch so far was the absolute worst. I was kicked off a few tables; people having specific spots in which they sat everyday with their teams. Walking out of the cafeteria, I found a quiet bench outside, overlooking the many sport fields. I drank my water in complete silence, watching some guys play soccer out in the far pitch. The time seemed to move along slowly, my loneliness only bringing more depression. I didn't have a lot of friends at my previous school but I had never been kicked off 2 tables or ended up sitting outside alone. 'I guess I'm just destined to be alone be it home or school,' I sighed loudly. I sat, staring at the sky for the rest of my lunch, only moving my attention when the bell echoed over the large expanse of the school.

I sulked inside, my backpack laying lazily over my sore shoulders. Heading over to the large gym, I was given quite the bump in the hallway. My severely bruised shoulder stung as I peered over; trying to see if I could tell who it was and if it was intentional or not. Sadly, I was new here and had no way of telling who it was or what their motive may have been. With a heavy sigh, I readjusted the strap of my bag and headed into the spacious locker room. Half of the room was filled with lockers; a portion of the cubbies being larger than the others. I found that the second half of the room was partially covered, a wall separating the shower stalls and sport equipment rooms.

My schedule listed my gym locker and its comb. I hesitantly moved to the back wall, reading the tiny etched numbers. I then moved down, heading further right, away from the locker room entrance. Other's piled in, the athletes getting the largest, front lockers, chatting loudly, filling the silence with echoing laughter. Some of the genius's packed into back row; my locker being completely isolated from everyone. The guys changed as I opened my gym locker, putting my belongings -minus the schedule I will need to get this junk back out- inside the safety of the metal contraption. By the time I was done storing my items, everyone was heading out the back doors, into the gym.

Everyone stood in two different lines; the separation of athletes and brainiacs apparent yet again. I found it disgusting that they labeled people like this; smart or dumb, physically built or weak. I fit into neither clique, my abilities being unfound or forgotten with my current life style.

"Jӓger?" The teacher's voice was strong, her authoritative tone causing me to jump. I hard a few snickers from people, my face filing pink and my clenched fist growing tighter.

"Y-yes, ma'am?" I spoke quietly and stuttered; the last thing I truly wanted to do in front of someone with such an overconfident aura. People prey on the weak and I had clearly just shown about 45 classmates that I spoke weakly like a dog with it's tail between it's quivering legs. 'Good job, Eren!'

"Any sports?" She gave an obvious question and I just shook my head. "Well, you aren't here for the athletics program and judging by the fact that you forgot your clothes today, you must not be here for the academics either. That leaves me to believe that you are just simply 'average' with some parents that have extra cash to throw around. Well, normal, get in line with the big boys and be prepared to join in; gym clothes or not, we still play." The woman pointed everything out in the open, everyone laughing at my talentless life. I hung my head lower, my eyes on the floor as I shuffled over to the athletes that I knew I would soon come to despise.

My anxiety and depression were through the roof, my stomach threatening to shove my previously eaten foods back up out of pure discomfort. My teacher began instructions, my mind running back over what she had said and finding one true theme behind all of her words. 'I am worthless...'

I've been told that I am just a waste of space before by many; kids at Shiganshina High and my father being the most painful. Being called worthless in any situation hurts. The second you hear that slip from someone's lips your eyes go wide and your heart just simply shatters; the vile word acting as a hammer and breaking away at your most vital point as if it were made of fragile glass. The feeling of being told that is an extreme rush of overwhelming pain, confusion, and later, self-loathing. It only takes a remarks about how your existence is a complete and utter mistake before you start to believe them. Believing them is wrong and I know that….but it's not just something you can ignore so easily. Being told that you don't belong living is just something horrible that no one should ever have to suffer through. I've been informed of my unimportance enough to know how it feels; like a nail being driven into my flesh each and every time I hear it. The word worthless constantly flashes through my thoughts and it doesn't seem like it will ever leave. The cruel tone and harsh terms will stick with me forever; every time I make a mistake, I realize that everyone was right about me. The term worthless tends to affect me most when I'm alone with nothing but my thoughts. Ruminating around in each and every waking thought, causing me to remember just how lonely and unloved I truly am. This is the type of word that will forever be imprinted within; leaving not only mental pain but physical scar as well.

"Jӓger!" I jumped yet again as I was snapped back to reality, earning a few more unwanted snickers. "Pay attention!" I nodded in reply as she finished up the lesson. "Athletes play athletes, academics play academics; same as always. Now head outside to the fields and grab the correct flags." Like slaves, we were pushed outside, a box of matching belts and streamers being sifted through by the many hands of the students. I chose a green, watching as others plucked out other then walked to the far off stadium, meeting the teacher at the gates. She informed the teams of their rivals and stations before sending us off to play flag football. My team, the green, was set against the red; a definitely unfair battle once looking over the loaded enemy group. Despite knowing that, we still played. Before even starting though, we chose positions and tasks. My job, as specifically told to me, was to stay out of everyone's way. The comment stung but the pain was numbed by the petite, blonde's angelic smile.

"Be nice to the new kid; he has it rough switching to such a powerful school!" Her disciplinary actions made me happy even though the other's just brushed it off.

With everything now settled, we started the game; everyone moving to take their positions. Surprisingly, Christa, the cute dancer, was quite agile, her small size allowing her to squeeze past people with ease. Despite our team's efforts, we were losing; the horse-faced guy named Jean was skilled, showing off his years of practice. The 'potato chips' girl proved that her gluttonous ways hadn't harmed her amazing speed, stamina, or long jumps. The energetic 'buzz-cut' was officially named 'Connie'; his abilities as a newbie quarterback, tennis player, volleyball setter, and soccer forward was revealed with his quick reactions and smooth movements. The red team was officially stacked against us; full of strong players and muscle freaks.

No surprise at all, we were down by four touchdowns and the others on my team were enraged by our quick defeat. Now stuck in a compromising situation, Christa threw it to the only person that was left unguarded; me. I managed to catch the football but hesitated too long, the reds already on my heels. With my mind made up, I ran the ball as fast as I possibly could. Luckily for me, I was already near the end zone and could practically taste the victorious touchdown. 'I...I can do this! I will help my team!' With but a yard or so left, Jean tackled me brusquely to the ground. I winced at the pain of impact as he got off me; laughing and cheering with the football in his rough hands. As I slowly began to pick myself up, off the expensive turf, he grabbed a chunk of my hair.

"Not this time, 'normal'," He whispered directly into my ear. My eyes opened wide, a cold shiver running down my back. This small action triggered something within me; my whole body beginning to feel hot, my head dizzy, and my stomach, extremely nauseous. Jean then threw the ball back to the others, talking about the next play as if he didn't break the rules. Christa, the angel she is, told them to wait as she caringly checked to make sure that I was physically okay; not knowing that mentally, this small attack had sent me over the edge.

"Eren? Hey, are you okay?" She knelt down, looking me over carefully. I simply shook my head, a hand over my mouth and my body hunched over; ready to empty my stomach's minimal contents on the field. "I'll go get the teacher, you wait here," she ran quickly.

"What's wrong with the 'normal'?" Jean snickered.

"You tackled him without warning despite the fact that it's against the rules! You're such an ass, Jean!" She spat as she rushed past the others. Her comment made the others turn to Jean, poking fun at him and saying that he'd been verbally bitch slapped. Despite all of that nonsense, Christa returned with the teacher only a moment later.

"Class is almost over; head back in, take your showers, and get dressed." The teacher passed her name badge to the trustworthy angel, allowing Christa to lead the others back inside the building. With everyone funneling out of the stadium, the teacher tried to help me up, grabbing my upper arm uncomfortably. I winced at the action, pulling away out of fear with a childish whimper. Her eyes went momentarily wide at my reaction. She may or may not have understood my harsh reaction...lets hope not. Luckily, she then gave me my space to slowly move stand up.

It took me a few minutes to settle down however I managed to pick myself up and brush my clothing clean of any debris. The teacher kept a watchful eye on me as we walked in. She didn't question me about the happenings of the field or about my health. Personally, I don't know whether or not I actually wanted her to ask; I didn't want the jerk to get into trouble and later seek revenge but then again, I felt that he deserved to be punished for unjustly tackling me without warning.

At the locker room door, I was left alone, the teacher leaving for her office to write a pass as she had verbalised. Hesitantly, I moved into the locker room, quickly grabbing my belongings, and walking out past the newcomers. With little choice, I stopped by the gym offices, picking up my pass before heading to my next class.

With no enthusiasm to continue on with the day, I sauntered down the hallways and stairwells, exhaling heavily as I neared my 7th hour classroom. I was highly unexcited to have to interrupt class and introduce myself to the teacher; something that would cause all eyes to be on me yet again. I always hated entering class when it would draw any attention to myself. Hell, I simply detested being in class let alone around people; especially strangers. Then there was the fact that the United States school system crams information down your throat at an unimaginable rate; choking you until there is no possibility of you ever breathing again and trust me, nobody liked that! I gave another heavy sigh before knocking softly on the wooden door, cursing myself as I witnessed the handle swiftly turning. A shaky inhale fills the silence as I witness the teacher standing just past the threshold of the filled classroom.

"Well, if it isn't the new guy!" One of the children called out, a few others chuckling along with comment. My cheeks immediately flushed pink and I hung my head, the teacher ushering me in and pointing me towards my seat. I fell into my desk with a nervous breath, finding myself mentally incapable of lifting my eyes off the patterned browns of the desk's surface. I remained the rest of the hour with downcast eyes and a nervous twist in my guy.

"Eren…" the teacher approached, "Eren, the bell has already rung." I peered up at him, apologizing softly as I pulled my backpack onto my shoulder. "Eren, I know that the first day can be extremely tough but just remember that things get easier." I left with those words echoing in my head. The only reply I could muster the strength to actually say was 'lies'. Everyday, as usual, will continue to grow worse as it always has.

I got to the second floor library for my last class of the day; study hall. I was surprised to find the tables fully packed with a mixture of the academic and athletic students. Although the crowd was bigger and filled with many types of people, my mind still wasn't at peace. Having seen most of the usual guys and girls from my classes was difficult enough because I seemed to stick out like a sore thumb but now...now I was being engulfed by a sea of people that were all superior compared to me; smarter, stronger, agile, nimble; you name it, they were better. Of course it's painful to know that you're absolutely worthless compared to everyone else in the room but to also feel like all eyes were on you, judging you, and wishing you would just go jump off a bridge.

I clenched my teeth and grit my teeth as a large hand roughly slapped my upper back. "Hey there, normal!" The buff blond gave a wicked grin. "Still feeling queasy?" I shook my head in response, already guessing that these three would be some of my new nightmares. "Well, well, well….good to know that the normal knows how to take a hit even if it was a weak one." My eyes shot up to Reiner's face while the taller gave him an elbow to the ribs and the girl scoffed at his comment. At first, I was frightened by his words but found Bertholdt and Annie's actions as a warning sign. "See you later, normal." The three walked away chattering, leaving me with a cold shiver running down my back.

'Did 'see you later' mean that they would just simply see me around school or was it a hidden threat?' I lowered my head, moving to find a seat just as the bell rang. I found a pleasant spot in the back, two other people occupying some of the playful chairs. Bracing myself for minimal impact, I let myself fall onto a well stuffed bean bag wearily. Today had been long and very stressful; my body begging to rest. Knowing that it'd be unsafe to fall asleep here, I went to pull my cellphone out of my pocket and listen to some music but was crushed to remember that I would be left in utter silence thanks to Grisha.

"Any you are?" I jumped out of the chair slightly, looking at the older woman to my right. "I apologize for startling you, young lad." She gave me a kind smile as I recomposed myself comfortably on the bean bag. "So," she cleared her throat, "you are?" I looked at the paperwork in her hands and immediately understood that she was trying to take attendance.

"Eren Jӓger," I spoke louder than usual seeing as she was older and didn't deserve the extra strain of my social anxiety.

"Oh, are you perhaps related to Dr. Grisha Jӓger?" The name sent a wave of pain rippling through me like a forceful wave. "I know he used to work in Shiganshina; he actually was my husband's surgeon a few years ago." She spoke so kindly of my 'father'. To no surprise, my only reply was a small nod and a secretive dig of nails into the soft flesh of my palm. "He is such a brilliant, loving, young man. You are so very lucky to have such a great father."

She...how could she say such a thing about that….that man! How could the whole world be fooled by his public display? How could they not see who he really was? I mean, how could anyone say that that abusive drunkard was a 'great father' when they weren't the one living with him. And...and...how could they not see the pain flicker through my eyes at the mere mention of his name?"

"Well, please give him my thanks," she smiled, moving along to mark other students as present. Having nothing to do, -homework not being something even remotely important to me anymore-, I let her words ruminate through my aching mind.

'If only they could see who he truly is… the way he doesn't hesitate to fiercely whip a hand across my mother's cheek or the way he uses all the force he can muster to deal hard blows to someone that is already paralyzed in agony, writhing on the floor. If only I had the courage to get up and tell someone...no, they wouldn't believe me even if I did...they would probably laugh and claim that I'm just seeking the bruises would just make people think that I am some problematic child that gets into fights. No one would listen to the socially awkward, filthy boy when his 'father' is a man with such a good reputation," I sighed heavily, knowing that I was and forever would be alone in this mess.

The repetitive chime of the school bell echoed loudly throughout the library, the vast number of students filing out of the 4 doorways. I waited a moment before standing up and heading out into the emptying halls. I quickly checked the time before heading towards the exit.

"Eren!" I turned around, worried, but found the freckled boy waving for my attention. The boy jogged up to me, slightly out of breath. He adjusted his glasses before speaking once again. "Eren, I'm so sorry!" He politely bowed his head. "Jean was such a jerk, tackling you out of the blue when he knows that it's supposed to be a friendly game of football!" He was way out of line and I apologize for his behavior. You aren't hurt though, are you?" This guy….was an absolute angel! Despite his kindness, I felt that he was wasting his breath; apologizing for the one that was truly in the wrong.

"I'm fine, thanks," I mumbled.

"It was no problem at all! I'm just glad that you're okay!" He smiled brightly. "If he ever gets out of hand again, just let me know and I'll have a talk with him." I felt momentarily reassured by his words; knowing that someone was here to keep this kid in line. My calm soon passed, the realization of me ending up as a 'tattle-tale' not being a fond idea. "Well, have a great day then!" He ran off with a wave.

With a nod goodbye, I walked out the double doors and into the refreshing autumn air. With no further need to remain at school, I began to head home, trying to remember the route back to the new house. As my feet carried me forward, down an unfamiliar path, my fingers gripped the straps of my backpack; the material still hanging loosely over my weak, bruised shoulders. After a short time, my body developed a rhythm, my feet moving to the beat of my own drum. The gentle breeze blew arbitrarily, catching my hair and clothing, pulling at them with the strength of a weak child. I closed my eyes, allowing my jacket to billow freely as I let the wind carry away some of my thoughts and worries. The leaves rattled as I stood in peace, the crunchy debris being strewn across the healthy green grass. Matching the natural sounds were dull thuds, almost as if someone….was nearing. I quickly pried my eyes open, turning towards the shuffling of shoes against pavement. To no avail, my awareness had failed me; a heavy arm falling over my shoulder, causing me to violently flinch away.

"Aww, Eren, are you running away already?" Reiner questioned, pulling me a bit too close, therefore trapping me tightly against his muscular figure.

"Mind if we have a quick chat?" Annie asked, looking slyly malicious as usual.

"W-well, I-" Reiner's arm moved, uncomfortably squeezing my neck between his upper and lower arm in an almost 'headlock'-like manner. Personally, just having someone near instilled fear deep within me but this….having someone's arm wrapped around my neck in what may be a malevolent attack threw me over the edge; the signs of a panic attack starting.

"It's alright, Eren. None of us are going to hurt you." My eyes snapped to Reiner as he began to force me forward; the other two closing off any smart escape route that I may try to take. "The three of us just wanted to be friendly and warn you of your 'welcome party' that will take place tomorrow."

"P-party? O-of what sort?" My whole body was burning up, my hands starting to tremble, my breathing ragged, and my thoughts growing horribly fuzzy.

"Yep, a party! It's like an initiation for Sina High's newest 'normal'! I mean, you must receive an official welcome from your new friends, right?" His words only helped to further the progression of my difficulties; my body now stumbling about like a baby fawn on this legs. "Since we're throwing you a party, you won't skip school tomorrow, will you?" He added with threatening sarcasm.

"If you do decide to ditch, everyone will just wait until you return from hiding like some worthless coward." Once again that word has haunted me. To no surprise, it caused me to grimace; knowing all too well how my father has embedded 'worthless' deep within the marrows of my bones.

"Oh, and before we go," Reiner leaned closer to my ear, "we just wanted to wish you good luck for tomorrow; wouldn't want you to be one of the unlucky bastards that end up in the hospital after initiation." My breath hitched. The blond simply harumphed and released me, allowing me to crumble to my hands and knees. The three then walked away, leaving me with a snide comment, "Eren, don't forget to breathe...if you even can."

Sadly, it took me time to calm down and regain my ability to properly inhale oxygen. When I finally managed to do so, I got up and stumbled to my one safe place; the park. Upon arrival, I surveyed the area, finding no one but myself and little critters around. I took my spot on the old, worn out swing, fingers tightly gripping the rusted chains as worry consumed me.

Of course home and school had almost always been a battleground; my father and the bullies being relentless. To my dismay, Sina was proving to be even harsher than the last. To top it all off, my father was clearly showing his unhealthy dependence on alcohol; seemingly drinking more as of late. With so many enemies, my body won't be able to function from all of the abuse. Hell, even my own personal punishment was beginning to cause problems! Why did everything always have to work out horribly for me?

To some advantage, I at least had this park to run to in times of need. Sadly, this location could only last for so long; the weather only growing worse with each passing day. I would soon have to find some other place to take refuge.

After quite some time, my eyes caught a flash; the park's hanging lights flickering on, signaling just how late it was getting. With dread weighing me down, I gave a heavy sigh and pulled myself off the swing. To calm myself before the storm, I took a single walk around the entire park, my fingers ghosting over the chords connecting each little L.E.D. I released the green wires, heading down the secluded sidewalk. Oddly enough, the darkness didn't affect my anxiety; probably even relaxing me more than even the light did. To also help, I decided to hum to myself softly; music always being a way to escape from the harsh pain of reality. Of course any type of singing wasn't my first choice but with my cellphone and downloaded music destroyed, humming was all I had left.

Finally, after jamming to my own acapella beat of Breaking Benjamin and Three Days Grace, I made it to my block; Rose Boulevard. There, I stopped vocalizing songs, instead allowing the worry to overtake my mind once again. 'Will he be mad at me for making mom worry? No, what if he blames her for my disappearance again? What if...what if she's seriously hurt or...worse…' These cumbersome thoughts drove me to move faster.

Halfway down the street, my light job slowed to a stop; the small, falling embers catching my eyes. "Just heading home now, brat?" His voice startled me, causing me to jump. "You realize how dangerous it is to walk around when it's this dark, right?" Levi commented again.

"Y-yeah, I know," I mumbled as usual.

"Uh-huh, sure you do," he replied back with utter sarcasm, "that's why you're out here. Well, I'll just have to walk your ass back home to protect you from whatever shitty predator may be lurk in the darkness."

"Th-thanks but...I'll be fine on my own, I answered honestly. Personally, I was worried that Levi would walk with me and end up finding out that 'predators' don't always lie in wait for their prey in the dark. I know that it's weird that I feel the need to hide my family problems from everyone but I always had what I believed were good reasons to continue keeping the information to myself. One reason was because I always feared that a someone would come and speak with mom and Grisha about it, leaving afterwards to have Grisha take his anger out on mom and I. It's stupid to think that way and to hide the pain from the world but it's what I personally felt was right.

"Too late, I've already decided to walk your little ass back to mommy," he commented while standing up from his spot on the porch steps.

"N-no, it's really okay! I promise!" I waved my hands out frantically to stop him.

"It's not that far, right? I'll just give you some damn good company."

"No, no, it's fine! You can just finish your cigarette here, I'll be fine!" I pushed however it didn't work, Levi moving down the sidewalk without heeding my words.

"Hurry up, brat," he teased, taking another drag from his white and orange cigarette. With a sigh, I reluctantly followed. "How was school?" He asked, my shoulders tightening.

"Well…"I wanted to complain but felt that it would've been a waste of breath, "...nobody died so I would say that things turned out fine." I left it off with an awkward laugh and nails scratching the back of my neck in discomfort.

"Well, lets hope no one keels over at Sina, it would ruin their fucking high and mighty reputation," he teased once again.

"Y-yeah," I simply agreed, the conversation falling there and leaving us to walk in general silence the rest of the way to my house.

"Well, at least your home safe now," he smiled, stomping out his cigarette on the walkway. "Have a great night." I nodded in response before knocking on the door softly. Levi didn't wait up, walking back down the street with his thumbs in the pockets of his dark jeans. By the time mother opened the door, the ravenet was already halfway home.

"Eren," Carla gave a sigh of relief, "we all know it doesn't take 6 and a half hours to walk a measly four miles."

"I know. I'm sorry," my voice was weak but she just gave me a reassuring smile.

"Oh well, at least you came back," she giggled, allowing me inside the house.

"Where is Grisha?" I lowered my voice even more than usual but, even if she didn't hear my question, she knew what I was asking.

"He's asleep upstairs. He got home and crashed so I'm guessing that he's had a pretty busy day. Probably a few emergency cases or state fly-ins." I nodded with momentary glee before placing my backpack on the floor. "Lets hope that tonight continues to go smoothly."

"Agreed," I added with a small grin.

"How was school today?" I tried to also head straight to bed but to no avail; she questioned the happenings of my day before I got the chance to even leave the room.

"Fine," I rushed my answer, using a strong, abrupt tone than she wasn't quite used to. "I-it was fine but….I'm exhausted so….I'm just going to head off to sleep." I moved past her, heading towards the stairs.

"Eren, aren't you hungry?" She followed after.

"No, I'm fine. I saved my lunch money and used it for supper at a small restaurant near the school," I lied through my teeth, my mother giving me a worried look but letting me go without further questioning. Once upstairs and safely in my locked room, I gave a heavy sigh. Today had really drained me of all my energy; my body falling limply on the queen-sized bed. Before giving myself some mental comfort with my one and only 'friend', I let my thoughts fly around. Without realizing it, I fell fast asleep, the day taking a greater toll than I had even estimated.