"What am I doing?" Aubrey asked herself this over and over, hoping that a better plan would arise from the words. She was back at their dorm, hovering outside the door because she knew that Chloe was in there. It was Sunday night and predictably she would be sitting in front of the TV with her books surrounding her. It was Chloe's weekly study binge.

Before she turned around she reminded herself who she was and that she did not run from things. Well, maybe she had a few days ago but one weekend at home with her father was enough to shame her into returning with renewed determination. Everything had to be perfect and normal again between herself and Chloe. She needed it to be.

The lock turned easy and she entered the apartment, finding Chloe just where she had expected. She could hear the faint music coming from the headphones on Chloe's head and she smiled at the sight of the books haphazardly strewn around the coffee table, floor, and onto the couch. It was something she could see a thousand times and appreciate more on each occasion. It was just so Chloe.

She put her keys down on the table, hoping that the sound would get Chloe's attention but it didn't. So, she moved closer. "Chloe," she said. Her voice carried over the music and Chloe looked up, wide eyed.

"Hey," she said while pulling the headphones off and sitting up. Surprise gave way to bitter flavored words. "I wondered if you were coming back."

Aubrey's lips turned down. She deserved that. "Of course, I came back. This is where I live." She hung her bag on one of the pegs by the door and walked across the living room to the other side of the couch. "We need to talk."

Chloe closed her book and set it aside. She was not thrilled about this turn of events. If she hadn't already been confused enough she could feel the emotion rolling off of Aubrey in waves. It was hard to resist but she didn't want it to sway her to just go along and pretend everything was fine. She wouldn't swallow the hurt this time.

"Okay, talk," Chloe said.

This was going to be harder than Aubrey imagined but she also deserved that. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I know I did. I was stupid." Jumping into the discussion seemed the best approach. Going for the heart of the issue made it less painful to tear the bandage off and the small sentences bolstered her confidence in what she intended to say. "I love you."

Chloe looked up. If Aubrey meant what she was implying then…

"Not just in a friend way." Aubrey's back straightened. "And I'm sorry if I made you think I didn't but it's all useless anyway because I can't be with you." She hated the brutal fact and the words felt broken coming out of her mouth. Chloe's confusion pulled her heart farther into the mire.

"What the hell?" Chloe spat the words. To say the words that she most wanted to hear and then take it all away. It was cruel. "Why would you tell me that?"

The ground was slipping from under her conviction but Aubrey stood strong. "I can't risk it but I wanted you to know that I didn't just kiss you to mess with your head. I lost control for a second and don't worry, it won't happen again."

Giving in to her feelings would just make life harder for both of them because it would change their relationship, it would risk her father's good will, and it wouldn't last. Love never lasted. It was a hard lesson she had learned early.

"Well, I guess I should thank you," Chloe's incredulous voice rose in volume with every syllable. "God, Aubrey, you're so arrogant." She got up and grabbed her jacket. "Seriously… you can't risk it?"

Aubrey was taken aback. "No, I can't. You're my best friend and that isn't something I've ever had before." She followed Chloe to the door. "Plus, you know how my Dad is and I can't lie to him. He will ask if I'm seeing anyone."

The laugh started low and built into an exaggerated guffaw. "Wow," Chloe said. "You know, I've got to go meet someone for coffee. I wouldn't want to risk being late." She walked through the door, leaving Aubrey standing there holding it open.

Aubrey stepped into the doorway and watched Chloe go. Her two feet standing upon the principle she believed so staunchly in. Honesty and emotions were like gunpowder and a flint. The scorch marks were in evidence all over her, leaving her falling apart inside the shell of her body.